pink hearts
i've been self-involved & difficult. residing inside myself, only sticking my head out to communicate with you during bad weather. keeping myself so connected to myself, that my connection with you hollowed out. i've been callous, i've made you believe you are less important than you really are, acting as if i needed no one, nothing. i've been unfair & unapologetic. unloading all my anger on you, when the real targets were unavailable. or when the real target was me. i've been unpleasant. i've been dishonest. i've been malicious. i've been hateful. i've been selfish. i've been hurtful. i've been everything i would never want you to be. i've been wrong. & instead of reaching for white-out to cover up all my mistakes & act like i didn't intend for them to be there, act like i was an innocent victim to my own bitchiness, i'm going to turn the page & open a new one. i'm going to pull out my pink-inked pen, & make the content of the next pages better, prettier. i'm going to write more honestly & peacefully, while leaving a trail of little pink hearts on every page.
<3
lauren
<3
lauren