(no subject)
Obviously I'm dissappointed and obviously I've cried more today than I have in my entire life, but this whole thing was bound to end sooner or later. We had our fifteen minutes of fame, we've been exposed.
Our first game was okay. I went 0 for 5 and errored between the legs again. We lost 6-2. I bawled my eyes out so hard, you don't even know. I guess I'm really hard on myself. The worst thing is having to pull yourself together for a must win situation game, but I managed to do it.
So get this, there's a runner on first and she's running on the pitch. The hitter hits it towards second, I get it one-hop, step on second for one out and then I'm throwing it to first for the double play and the runner slams into me and kind of flips me over her. And they don't call her for interference? The umps told the fans later that they blew the play and they knew it. I scored the second run making the score 2-2. They got two more and won 4-2, but the only thing thats so hard is that we wanted it so much more.
I cried so hard. I still cry thinking about it. I hate that I have to wait so long until I can play again and I hate that there's no practice to go to tomorrow. I miss the point drill. I miss 'liquid metal'. I miss bad hops that hit me in the chest. I miss crying at practice and being miserable. I miss making errors even. I hate that I have to wait two weeks to play softball for BE. I'm crying now.
I ruined everything with everybody and I think it's catching up to me. I lost a best friend, I'm still not sure who's as fault. I've been led on by multiple people and let down by all of them.
I don't really know what else to say. There's so much I need to say but I just can't figure it out. My fingers hit the keys so much and I ramble for so long but what really needs to be said just doesn't ever come out. I know this makes no sense and I make everything longer than it has to be but I don't know what else to do.
I want to talk to every person. What have I done wrong that nobody likes me anymore? Just honestly tell me because I don't know what to do anymore.
Here are pictures.
CHRISSY.
<3
Antonio.
Cereal.
TINO.
More Antonio but look at Tino in back.
Mr. Beckett.
TONIGHT.
I love Sam Ide.