HMM
Jill's comment on my last entry made me think a lot more on being single and finding myself...so i'm going to elaborate a little bit.
I am VERY proud of the person that I am. And Jill was right, having a lot of single time really does let you get to know yourself. And I feel like I have completely found out the person that I really am. In high school I made A LOT of mistakes, I will admit that. My actions did not leave others with a good impression of me. However, I know now that that person I was acting like was not the real me inside. I was confused and going through a rough time trying to find myself. NOW I understand the real me and I am so proud of who that person is. I am SO different now than how I was and I know that it's not being different than who I am, its being who I really am.
I realize now what I want for myself, relationship wise...and relationships are probably one of the most important things that I have thought about while finding myself because who I am with guys is one of the biggest changes that has happened to me. I have learned what I really want with guys. If I could change one thing in my life, it would be to have known who I really was inside while I was dating my one and only true love. I made so many stupid mistakes while I was with him that I wish I could take back. If we started the love we had again today, it would be totally different and he would know how much I REALLY loved and cared for him and how serious I was for him because I would be able to show it better. I was so foolish back then and selfish and just made so many dumb mistakes...
Sorry if this kinda doesn't make any sense..i'm not sure it does but I'm just rambling whats going through my head. I just know that...i've matured A LOT and my actions now really reflect the kind of person that I want to be seen as. I'm not interested in messing around with guys and just 'getting some' or whatever. That is just DEFINETLY not even close to the person I am anymore.
I guess the point of this entry is just to say..i've discovered myself.
& I am DAMN proud of who Sara Winkler really is.
I am VERY proud of the person that I am. And Jill was right, having a lot of single time really does let you get to know yourself. And I feel like I have completely found out the person that I really am. In high school I made A LOT of mistakes, I will admit that. My actions did not leave others with a good impression of me. However, I know now that that person I was acting like was not the real me inside. I was confused and going through a rough time trying to find myself. NOW I understand the real me and I am so proud of who that person is. I am SO different now than how I was and I know that it's not being different than who I am, its being who I really am.
I realize now what I want for myself, relationship wise...and relationships are probably one of the most important things that I have thought about while finding myself because who I am with guys is one of the biggest changes that has happened to me. I have learned what I really want with guys. If I could change one thing in my life, it would be to have known who I really was inside while I was dating my one and only true love. I made so many stupid mistakes while I was with him that I wish I could take back. If we started the love we had again today, it would be totally different and he would know how much I REALLY loved and cared for him and how serious I was for him because I would be able to show it better. I was so foolish back then and selfish and just made so many dumb mistakes...
Sorry if this kinda doesn't make any sense..i'm not sure it does but I'm just rambling whats going through my head. I just know that...i've matured A LOT and my actions now really reflect the kind of person that I want to be seen as. I'm not interested in messing around with guys and just 'getting some' or whatever. That is just DEFINETLY not even close to the person I am anymore.
I guess the point of this entry is just to say..i've discovered myself.
& I am DAMN proud of who Sara Winkler really is.