I just dont know why.
And as I sit here...all that seems to run through my mind is you. I know Ive updated about this before. But its all thats going through my mind and I dont know what to do. It seems like theres noone around anymore. It seems like everywhere I look I lose someone. I dont know why. But it seems like my head always seems looking for you and once again I never can find you no matter how hard I look. It makes me terribly sad. I dont know why all I think about is you. I mean, theres hardly anyone else that intrests me. I mean theres one or two people but, thats it. Maybe Im relying too much on luck. I dont know. I wish I could just figure you out. But, sometimes I dont because it wouldnt be part of the learning experince and I havent found out exactly what it is that Im learning from this. Not to rely on luck...not to believe in love. I dont know. I just know that Im very much in love with you but, theres no way that you can still be in love with me still...if you were at all. I mean, you havent seen me in 5 months now and...that had to be enough time. I just know that all I feel for you is pure love none of that bullshit that kids my age pull. Thats retarded. I just wish you would tell me how you felt for me...so I would stop wondering and wasting my time on something that will never happen, but before I do. I wish you would talk to me, and let me know about all of this that I have been wondering and if you wondering anything about me You can talk to me about it. When you said "Sorry for being gone so long." I wanted to punch you because i dont understand why you were and you said it like you were coming back into my life...when I havent seen you since that day. I mean you gave me your number but you know for damn sure that Im never good at remembering things like taht. I have to write that shit down. Maybe I need to look past all of this and be optimistic about it. But from where I stand I dont see good in it. None at all. Youre stupid.
<33Hannah