new does not mean better
new just means different

my heart is in my throat and in my stomach simultaneously right now

i want to see you so badly it hurts it hurts it hurts

i don't want to be drunk
i don't want to hate myself
i don't want to feel like a burden
like a mess
like someone always has to be taking care of me
i don't want to be a joke

so all i want is to lay in bed with you every weekend
fresh out of the shower
pajamas on

easy

no shame the next day
no guilt
no fear
no embarrassment

easy
comfortable
happy

but no
i'm fine

steps were made for sitting
like
you were made for me

part one:
my husband has a girlfriend
what a strange sentence

part two:
it’s okay, i think

part three:
i have a crush and
i don’t know and
i overanalyze every text

part four:
i’m drinking this
entire bottle
by myself

happy new year

i hate valentine's day

sitting at a dead stop at a red light when i look up to my rearview mirror and see a full sized truck getting closer and closer and i have no idea how long he was in my mirror for but all of the sudden i'm screaming, feeling nothing but pure fear as the back of my car is slammed into the front of my car and my seatbelt is holding me tight as we ( Read more... )

i don't remember the last time i was this happy

maybe it's because he never cries, maybe i feel like i need to have enough sadness for the both of us