My notes are old.

[________chicago]

So I cant do this.
I have put myself out there.
I have played hard to get.
And what it all comes down to
Is me falling to the ground.
There is nothing left,
Nothing left that I can do.
I really want him
But he doesnt want me too.
He sees me as nothing.
Just a girl I guess.
And ordinary girl
Nothing special about her,
And I guess thats what I am now
no one has changed me.
I was special one time, maybe.
But now thats all gone,
All I have is sorrow
for what I see that I cant have.
So all of you were right
who said I couldnt get it.
I didnt
And I never will.
But thanks for believing in me.
thanks Misery
for being my friend
for keeping me company.
I dont see why I still want him
Even though it makes me cry.
He is something special
in my eyes he really is.
What is wrong with me.
my name doesnt stand out in the crowd.
who am I kidding.
Alex stands for stupid.
Im just an Idiot.
Im just an Idiot.

By the way
God...
Can you slow down
and be less hurtful.
Im getting really tired of this.
And one more thing..
Can you tell cupid to
come get his arrow
out of my back.
Oh wait.
Thats not an arrow.
I dont like backstabbers.
But thanks anyways.
Tell cupid not to even try.
Its not like he will anyways.
He never did for me.

-Alexxxx. Feb.12.06