Further Proof of My Madness
Goat Haiku (1-25)
I.
the goats leap around,
in this they are justified.
the force is with you
II.
my goat is quite ill
he ate too many berries
and is now puking
III.
there is a thin line
that separates you and me
from just being goats
IV.
once there was a goat.
he has many pairs of pants,
and that is the end
V.
my hair is frizzy.
it is a big tangled mess.
i must blame the goats.
VI.
did you hear the tale?
this large, multi-colored goat
ate my potato.
VII.
i miss my old goat.
we were friends until last year
because then he died.
VIII.
here is my secret -
many goats have crossed the bridge
but nine fell off it
IX.
spectacular goats
all join three-ring circuses
to dance the tango
X.
grandmother is old,
but she can still play bingo
with all of her goats
XI.
how many people
own turquoise mannequin heads
that their goats chew on?
XII.
will you go to Venice
to see Mr. Murgatroyd
and his argyle goats?
XIII.
i lived in a can,
but all the contagious goats
came and rescued me
XIV.
all my adventures
went quite smoothly, i admit.
though i missed my goats.
XV.
my goat has a hat.
he often wears it backwards -
then I laugh at him.
XVI.
i feel guilty that,
because i ate the pasta,
our goats got the flu.
XVII.
don't dare question me.
with mystical goat powers,
i'm a mighty fiend.
XVIII.
the goats are calling.
they tell me i have termites.
where's the telephone?
XIX.
many goats are green.
some are yellow or purple.
purple is sexy.
XX.
if ever i die,
put my belongings away
and feed all my goats.
XXI.
no more teasing me.
the goat and i are happy
so leave us alone
XXII.
there is a berry
that tastes like a banana -
all goats enjoy it.
XXIII.
sometimes i dream of
many goats in a big field
eating checkerboards.
XXIV.
jump with parachutes
to meet all the goats dressed up
like ugly turtles
XXV.
go forth, my children,
to see the land of the goats
laid out before you
I.
the goats leap around,
in this they are justified.
the force is with you
II.
my goat is quite ill
he ate too many berries
and is now puking
III.
there is a thin line
that separates you and me
from just being goats
IV.
once there was a goat.
he has many pairs of pants,
and that is the end
V.
my hair is frizzy.
it is a big tangled mess.
i must blame the goats.
VI.
did you hear the tale?
this large, multi-colored goat
ate my potato.
VII.
i miss my old goat.
we were friends until last year
because then he died.
VIII.
here is my secret -
many goats have crossed the bridge
but nine fell off it
IX.
spectacular goats
all join three-ring circuses
to dance the tango
X.
grandmother is old,
but she can still play bingo
with all of her goats
XI.
how many people
own turquoise mannequin heads
that their goats chew on?
XII.
will you go to Venice
to see Mr. Murgatroyd
and his argyle goats?
XIII.
i lived in a can,
but all the contagious goats
came and rescued me
XIV.
all my adventures
went quite smoothly, i admit.
though i missed my goats.
XV.
my goat has a hat.
he often wears it backwards -
then I laugh at him.
XVI.
i feel guilty that,
because i ate the pasta,
our goats got the flu.
XVII.
don't dare question me.
with mystical goat powers,
i'm a mighty fiend.
XVIII.
the goats are calling.
they tell me i have termites.
where's the telephone?
XIX.
many goats are green.
some are yellow or purple.
purple is sexy.
XX.
if ever i die,
put my belongings away
and feed all my goats.
XXI.
no more teasing me.
the goat and i are happy
so leave us alone
XXII.
there is a berry
that tastes like a banana -
all goats enjoy it.
XXIII.
sometimes i dream of
many goats in a big field
eating checkerboards.
XXIV.
jump with parachutes
to meet all the goats dressed up
like ugly turtles
XXV.
go forth, my children,
to see the land of the goats
laid out before you