Oh, god, I am so sorry that you are going through this. Only one of those things happening to someone would be enough, but the fact that it's all piling on top of you at once is so terrible and frightening. I agree with the other comments about a women's shelter (or shelter in general -- maybe even a youth hostel?). I wish I could think of something else that could help you in the short term (long term, you might be able to take some legal action on your ex, but I don't know too much about that).
As for suicide, please I know things seem very dire, but I truly hope it doesn't come to that for you. I know when you're in the thick of it, suicide ideation seems like a great escape, both mentally and physically. I've had issues with that myself in recent months and have been helped a lot so far by a book I'm reading called 'How I Stayed Alive When My Brain Was Trying to Kill Me' by Susan Rose Blauner. One thing Blauner goes into is the truth about suicide and de-romanticizes it.
For example, not people many know that many suicide attempts end up not only failed, but with life-long medical effects, such as permanent brain damage or disabilities. This makes life for the person who attempted suicide often far worse than what brought them to that point in the first place. I'm not trying to overly frighten you, just trying to make you understand what might very well happen if you do in fact try to kill yourself. Most people that attempt suicide do not in fact want to die, they just want to escape their circumstances. I firmly believe there is always a way out, no matter how bad things look.
I would definitely recommend calling a suicide prevention line, at least to help you get things into perspective. A good number is 1-800-SUICIDE (1 800-784-2433). Please give them or some other professional a call. The world would be a much darker place without you. :(
As for suicide, please I know things seem very dire, but I truly hope it doesn't come to that for you. I know when you're in the thick of it, suicide ideation seems like a great escape, both mentally and physically. I've had issues with that myself in recent months and have been helped a lot so far by a book I'm reading called 'How I Stayed Alive When My Brain Was Trying to Kill Me' by Susan Rose Blauner. One thing Blauner goes into is the truth about suicide and de-romanticizes it.
For example, not people many know that many suicide attempts end up not only failed, but with life-long medical effects, such as permanent brain damage or disabilities. This makes life for the person who attempted suicide often far worse than what brought them to that point in the first place. I'm not trying to overly frighten you, just trying to make you understand what might very well happen if you do in fact try to kill yourself. Most people that attempt suicide do not in fact want to die, they just want to escape their circumstances. I firmly believe there is always a way out, no matter how bad things look.
I would definitely recommend calling a suicide prevention line, at least to help you get things into perspective. A good number is 1-800-SUICIDE (1 800-784-2433). Please give them or some other professional a call. The world would be a much darker place without you. :(
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