:-/
I haven't updated in a while. Got a few things to talk about.
School. All done. What a waste of money. or so I thought til recently. I think I want to try to pursue movies. Alot of money is in the lower-grade tech positions. Heck, a simple grip makes 600 a week. and that's a low ball figure.
I've been feeling like I didn't want to do the epct anymore cause I was just too busy and noone seemed to trust me but this recent show everyone congratulated me x1,000,000. It felt good. Semi-Pro and Pro actors were all giving me praise, saying I did stuff right. So I started to feel good about myself.
The Grand Prix season is coming to an end so I want to try to collect and do some under-the-table jobs to get some extra money and hopefully live the holiday season comfortably this year. I want to be able to buy people things.
So I've been dating Brittney for about 2 years now come wednesday. However, to be honest, I don't know whats happening with that. Her dad don't want me around and her brother is being an angst-ful twat pocket. She has a new dog so she can only go out if her dad is watchign the dog or if the dog is asleep. And she's still at RIC. There's very little neutral ground I can see her at w/o pissing someone off. It just fucking sucks. I meet a great girl and things go well until I do something positive like graduate from college, then I don't see much of her anymore cause I'm always working or something.
And on that note, I've recently wronged her AND violated a good friend of mine in 1 swift move. (Actually, it wasn't so much swift, but a drunken move). I was at my most recent show's cast party and I got a little more drunk than I've ever had been before. I've only been drunk twice previously and I've usually been well-behaved but this party was different. A friend of mine asked me to lay on the floor with her, so I did, and it was perfectly innocent. We were just talking and being comfy out of the way of others. But as we dozed off, apparently I started necking her and kissing her. I don't recall much of this at all. I remember petting her back to calm her and having Candice stare at us. Once they took her home I started thinking "aw shit" and I called Brittney. Told her I'd talk to her in the morning when I was sober, and when I did I told her everything that I could remember and everything people said I did because I wanted her to know so she knows I'm not hiding anything and that I feel wrong. I also tried to contact my friend to simply apologize but she's obviously too creeped out by me. I just hope we can still hang out without her feeling creeped out by me. I mean.. we're both adults. We drank too much. Something happened, and it's in the past. I just want to apologize and put it in the past.
As for Brittney, she says she's cool with it but I still want to talk with her cause I want to make sure we're on good terms but as I've mentioned before, we're shakey as it is and I want to make sure we don't fall apart.
And I do believe I'm being over descriptive and counter-productive here and I want to ctrl-a backspace this whole thing but I need to be honest and I want to vent.
Anyways. Sorry Brittney. Love you. And sorry you-know-who. I hope we can put this behind us.
School. All done. What a waste of money. or so I thought til recently. I think I want to try to pursue movies. Alot of money is in the lower-grade tech positions. Heck, a simple grip makes 600 a week. and that's a low ball figure.
I've been feeling like I didn't want to do the epct anymore cause I was just too busy and noone seemed to trust me but this recent show everyone congratulated me x1,000,000. It felt good. Semi-Pro and Pro actors were all giving me praise, saying I did stuff right. So I started to feel good about myself.
The Grand Prix season is coming to an end so I want to try to collect and do some under-the-table jobs to get some extra money and hopefully live the holiday season comfortably this year. I want to be able to buy people things.
So I've been dating Brittney for about 2 years now come wednesday. However, to be honest, I don't know whats happening with that. Her dad don't want me around and her brother is being an angst-ful twat pocket. She has a new dog so she can only go out if her dad is watchign the dog or if the dog is asleep. And she's still at RIC. There's very little neutral ground I can see her at w/o pissing someone off. It just fucking sucks. I meet a great girl and things go well until I do something positive like graduate from college, then I don't see much of her anymore cause I'm always working or something.
And on that note, I've recently wronged her AND violated a good friend of mine in 1 swift move. (Actually, it wasn't so much swift, but a drunken move). I was at my most recent show's cast party and I got a little more drunk than I've ever had been before. I've only been drunk twice previously and I've usually been well-behaved but this party was different. A friend of mine asked me to lay on the floor with her, so I did, and it was perfectly innocent. We were just talking and being comfy out of the way of others. But as we dozed off, apparently I started necking her and kissing her. I don't recall much of this at all. I remember petting her back to calm her and having Candice stare at us. Once they took her home I started thinking "aw shit" and I called Brittney. Told her I'd talk to her in the morning when I was sober, and when I did I told her everything that I could remember and everything people said I did because I wanted her to know so she knows I'm not hiding anything and that I feel wrong. I also tried to contact my friend to simply apologize but she's obviously too creeped out by me. I just hope we can still hang out without her feeling creeped out by me. I mean.. we're both adults. We drank too much. Something happened, and it's in the past. I just want to apologize and put it in the past.
As for Brittney, she says she's cool with it but I still want to talk with her cause I want to make sure we're on good terms but as I've mentioned before, we're shakey as it is and I want to make sure we don't fall apart.
And I do believe I'm being over descriptive and counter-productive here and I want to ctrl-a backspace this whole thing but I need to be honest and I want to vent.
Anyways. Sorry Brittney. Love you. And sorry you-know-who. I hope we can put this behind us.