Praise me, you maladroit simpletons, praise me!!!!!
I'm at school right now, typing this because I already finished the project we're supposed to be working on today. I find that while I am working on a project, I keep thinking about how everyone will react to it. I wish I could say "I just want to do the best job I can do," but I am plagued by thoughts of how "my project is going to be better than so-and-so's project" or "I'm better than everyone." I've never considered myself vain and I don't like this competition in my head -- if I'm better at something than someone else I should help them. I should share my talents, not revel in my superiority.
I've always had trouble dealing with good things about myself - I can't handle praise well - It's hard for me to do things I'm good at without feeling like I'm "showing off." It's as if my brain wishes I sucked at everything because that's somehow easier to deal with. I feel like I'm doomed to be either a self-deprecating whiner or an asshole show-off. I think it has something to do with my family.
I've always had trouble dealing with good things about myself - I can't handle praise well - It's hard for me to do things I'm good at without feeling like I'm "showing off." It's as if my brain wishes I sucked at everything because that's somehow easier to deal with. I feel like I'm doomed to be either a self-deprecating whiner or an asshole show-off. I think it has something to do with my family.