With every collapse...
So, i got my hair cut today, its friggin short. I'm kinda scared actually that i ASKED for it to be this short, and mikey's little "scene" hair cut with the long ass bangs is gone for a little while. But hey i was due for a change.
Shit hit the fan last week. i went into a downward spiral, and had no idea what i was doing with my life as it is so (in)conveniantly set up at the moment. I doubted almost everything that exists in my life, i felt worthless due to the lack of productivity (i.e. school or job or anything) in my life, i was bored, not working out, not happy, actually i was extraordinarily depressed to the point that i slept like 15 hours a night, took naps, and barely left the house save for johnny dragging me. I didnt want anything to do with cori, and i knew something was wrong.
But now through all that crap i have a job interview 2moro, kinda scared not gna lie, i got my job back at B&N which will make me some money til i find something better, ive gotten back into the swing of the gym thing, which gets my endorphines flowing and makes me want to kill things a lot less. I have given up my wreckless driving for now, because it will only kill me, due to the fact that there are only 2 defensive drivers in the world: me and my dad. everyone else is out for themselves. (i almost got killed the other day on a venting ride, and i learned that slow night drives are much more soothing than mid afternoon races through traffic.
Im happy with my relationship again. its hard to be in a healthy relationship when both participants are stressing out hardcore. it makes life so much more complicated.
O and for the record. I fucking hate everyone i know named Nikki/Nichole because i have had a skewed perception. so if you read this and are or know anyine that is a nikki/nichole and haven't been, or aren't addicted to cocaine, heroin or both, haven't stolen over 1000 dollars from a friend or a company you work for, and are a huge fucking slut on the verge of losing theyre genitals due to either them rotting away or a scientist cutting away at them to quarentine the infectious animal that has taken homage inside of ur vagina please call me because i am in need of a nicole that i can trust and stand to hear about/ talk to.
On that note...