Shitatsu Fanfic ^_^
Title: A Whole Lot Of Misunderstandings
Group(s): KAT-TUN and NEWS
Pairing(s): Kato Shigeaki / Ueda Tatsuya (ShiTatsu)
Genre(s): Fluff, Romance, and kind of Comedy/Crack
Word Count: 4670
Rating: R? For some coarse language (swearing) and really mild sexual references.
Summary: If you listen to your band mates then you and the person you love are in love with the sexy Osaka man but that’s not true so just who is everyone in love with?
Disclaimer: This fic comes entirely from my imagination and if through some weird impossible coincidence it is actually true it was not because I forced them into it as I don’t own them ^_^
Massu is eating, Tegoshi is feeding him and Koyama is smiling happily at the perfect display of member-ai. Just part of the normal lunch time routine in NEWS’ dressing room. However, Ryo and Yamapi having finished eating and for lack of better things to do decide to see what are the latest fics out on LJ.
“Ahhh Ryo look this one seems interesting”, Yamapi exclaims pointing to the latest Ryoda fic a tantalizing mix of angst and romance, love and hate, sweet and harsh words or so the author claims.
“Ryoda huh?” well it’s not surprising that fish lips can’t even resist me in the virtual world Ryo says with an expression of joy quickly opening the link.
In his corner of the dressing room Shige glances up with a derisive snort and then returns to his law textbook albeit the less interesting of the two texts. Yamapi and Ryo wisely chose to ignore this in favour of the fic and are soon engrossed. As they get to juicy parts Yamapi and Ryo start acting like school boys looking at their dad’s porn for the first time. Before long they’re reading out very loudly the more explicit parts with everybody in the room now listening. Before long Shige can’t help his mind from imagining Ryo and Ueda together doing …… it. As Yamapi reads on Shige’s heart starts to ache and his face starts to get red. Without even realising it he’s glaring at Ryo wanting to beat the crap out of him for touching his Ueda! His Ueda, damn what the hell was he thinking it was just a fic no need to get jealous no need to get jealous at all, Shige berates himself for being so foolish. However, as soon as he looks up to see Ryo’s happy smiling lust filled expression his face is once again red his fist’s clenched and his jealously stronger than ever.
Everyone suddenly turns to look at Shige in surprise as he glares at the computer screen confused except for Ryo who smirks and then swaggers over to Shige.
“Not jealous are we Shige-kun?” Ryo asks as Shige’s jaw drops out of disbelief Ryo actually got something right until Ryo adds laughing, “Come on, it’s written all over your face. Don’t worry I know it’s impossible to resist this sexy Osaka man”.
Now anger quickly replaces the jealously and Shige decides he doesn’t want to hear whatever else Ryo’s ego cares to make up, as it will no doubt be perverted and unable to hear reason, so without a word he quickly leaves the dressing room. The rest of NEWS sit in stunned silence, now their turn to stare at Ryo in disbelief that he actually got something right. That disbelief though is soon replaced by the knowledge that Shige actually likes Ryo and more than one of them can feel a headache coming on.
Yamapi though feels the need to say, “Ryo you didn’t need to tease him that much, it’s not his fault he likes you.” Ryo merely looks smug in response.
~~~~~~~~~
Meanwhile in KAT-TUN’s dressing room Jin has managed to talk Kame into looking for some Akame fics on the internet for a laugh. Jin is pointing out all the Akame fics to Kame laughing at the summary and the NC-17 ratings saying things like ‘I wonder what we do in this one to deserve a rating like that’. Kame simply rolls his eyes in response as he wonders about the sudden increase in Nishikato fics. When he points it out to Jin, Jin simply shrugs and suggests reading one, without waiting for an answer he clicks on a random link and starts to read out loud.
Ueda who was sitting on couch peacefully with his eyes closed now scrunches them shut trying to block out Bakanishi’s voice as all sorts of images of Ryo and Shige float through his head. As the fic gets more explicit Ueda’s face heats up, he starts to feel sick and is close to running out of the room to kill that little midget! How dare he even think of putting his dirty hands on his precious Shige? With a groan Ueda tries to put such petty jealous thoughts about a fictional Ryo out of his mind. His fists unclench, his breathing returns to normal and his face no longer holds traces of red but all this exertion is soon put to waste as Jin starts reading a Nishikato fic where Shige is taking the initiative. The very idea of Shige touching Ryo and wanting to is too much for Ueda’s fragile heart and all commonsense flies out the window. Forgetting Shige is not his and that the story is fictional, Ueda shoots up eyes blazing and storms out the door yelling, “How dare he touch Ryo!”
The silence that results is deafening and unprecedented in KAT-TUN’s dressing room. Also unprecedented is that all five reach a unanimous unbelievably conclusion, Ueda is in love with Ryo! As everyone looks at each other they can see this conclusion mirrored in each other's eyes.
“Damn I can’t believe Ueda is actually an M, I mean he must be after all the shit Ryo’s put him through to still be in love with him,” Jin says finally breaking the silence.
“Mmmmm,” Koki agrees, “Especially to the point he gets jealous of someone touching Ryo in a story he must have it bad!”
Everyone murmurs their agreement and just as Jin excitedly starts to tell the others about his brilliant plan to get Ueda and Ryo together they all hear a loud banging coming from just outside their dressing room.
~~~~~~~~~
Earlier after having left NEWS dressing room, Shige decides he’s in need of a nice refreshing drink and perhaps a mental health check I mean who gets so worked up about a fictional story written by some random teenage girl. He walks slowly glad of the quiet walk that calms his erratic heartbeat and lets him forget about the stupid story. However, when he finally arrives at the vending machines all calm thoughts fly out the window; he sees Ueda, collecting a drink and just about to turn around to face him. Unfortunately, his calm thoughts took all other coherent thoughts with him and all he is left with is nonsensical grunts which he wisely refuses to utter. Thus when Ueda finally turns around and sees him he is confronted by a silent staring Shige who is slowly getter redder and redder.
One thought flies back into Shige’s muddled brain but it’s not much help as if he were to state, ‘I wish the ground would swallow me up right now’ it might cause hurtful misunderstandings. So he simply stands there and notices with some fascination and wonderment that Ueda’s face also seems to be slowly getting redder and redder.
Ueda couldn’t believe it when he turned around to find Shige, Shige, staring at him with a faint blush on his cheeks. Unfortunately he seemed to catch what Shige had and found himself unable to do anything except imitate the other man. Thus if anyone were to chance upon them they would find two adult men staring intensely at each other with extremely red faces.
The one thought that entered Ueda’s mind after a while was only very slightly better than Shige’s and that was RUN!! And so with a slight bow Ueda did just that with a rather large sense of cowardice following right behind.
Shige, slightly confused, hurt and relieved decides it’s best to simply grab a drink and then walk to someplace that is not NEWS’ dressing room.
~~~~~~~~~
Ueda having totally embarrassed himself in front of the guy he likes, because of Bakanishi and the rest and their stupid idea that reading fanfiction about themselves is fun, decides if he doesn’t want to end up in jail for homocide (Because everyone except for Junno are homosexuals! Arghhh that’s worse than one of Junno’s puns!) decides to head to the NEWS dressing room hoping that a few arguments with Ryo will make him feel better whilst conveniently forgetting that it’s Shige’s dressing room.
~~~~~~~~~
At the same time Shige is once again putting himself down this time for making the guy he likes feel so uncomfortable he had to run away. Not to mention just one look at Tatsuya and his face turns bright red like some high school girl in bestselling shojo manga. He stops to bang his head harshly against a wall when suddenly a hand grabs his wrists and yanks him into a nearby room. Once he has his bearings he realises he’s in KAT-TUN’s dressing room and for one horribly second he wonders if Ueda is here. His heart calms down when he realises he isn’t.
~~~~~~~~~
Meanwhile Ueda in NEWS’s room is being told all about how Ryo and Pi were reading Ryoda fics and how Shige got all annoyed and jealous and thus it’s pretty obvious he likes Ryo. Ueda chest starts to ache and he can’t even come up with an insult though Ryo and his big ego are pretty much asking for one. But why else would Shige act like that? And that might also explain his strange behaviour at the vending machine, could it actually have been anger in his eyes too or just embarrassment as Ueda made Shige remember how he’d got jealous over a silly story. In the end Ueda can’t help but conclude that Shige must really like Ryo as then it all makes perfect sense.
Ueda of course feels compelled to ask what Ryo is going to do and Ryo, being Ryo, just gives Ueda an infuriating smirk whilst saying nonchalantly, “It’s none of your business is it fish lips? Maybe me and Shige will have some fun together if you get what I mean?”
One look at his face and even the densest of people could have understood Ryo’s meaning and thus rightly so Ueda get’s upset on Shige’s behalf, imagining a used heartbroken Shige he turns red with barely restrained anger. Glaring at Ryo he tries to say, ‘If you dare hurt the one I love I will never forgive you!” Unfortunately for Ueda in his enraged state it becomes, “GRHHHHHHHHHH I love GRHHHHHHH URGHHH you”. And thus when Ueda storms out the whole of NEWS think Ueda was jealous and also likes Ryo.
~~~~~~~~~
In KAT-TUN’s dressing room Kame is asking Shige why he was hitting his head against the wall, having just hit his head against the wall and not thinking very well Shige blurts out “I just ran into Ueda….” But that’s as far as he gets as Jin can’t resist telling Shige about how they were reading Nishikato fics and Ueda got all jealous and stormed out whilst glaring and muttering stuff about how dare Shige touch Ryo. Therefore it’s perfectly obvious that Ueda is desperately in love with Ryo. Despite his brains Shige can’t think of a single reason to dispute this.
So his heart starts to ache and he blurts out “He can’t like Ryo! Why? Why Ryo?”
Everybody interprets this to mean Shige also likes Ryo and therefore isn’t happy to hear about competition. Of course this isn’t immediately obvious from just those words so perhaps Ryo’s large ego and his constant reminders that he is ‘The sexy Osaka man’ actually had an effect on everyone. To their credit they were half right, Shige wasn’t very happy to hear about his competition especially in the form of the Sexy Osaka Man.
When Jin finally breaks the silence to actually ask him if he likes Ryo Shige’s too caught up in his own thoughts and just assumes they mean as friends since he and Ryo haven’t always got on perfectly and replies with a dismissive wave of his hand as he leaves the room “Of course”.
~~~~~~~~~
Shige and Ueda manage to make it back to their own dressing rooms without crossing paths.
Shige once he gets back to his spends the rest of the day staring at his “competition” and quickly glancing away whenever Ryo catches him staring, sometimes his face is bright red for getting caught and sometimes it’s bright red for the things he imagines happening between Ryo and Ueda. Of course he blames those thoughts entirely on the images Ryo and Pi had such fun reading out earlier as they just won’t stop torturing him. It also doesn’t help that whenever this happens Ryo has a huge smirk on his face and makes a remark to Yamapi about how Ueda was just in here confessing his love.
Ueda doesn’t have it much better but at least he doesn’t have to deal with his “competition”. No he only has to put up with Bakanishi and his relentless teasing about how he likes Ryo and that he better watch out because Shige’s also after him! Each ‘light hearted’ tease from Jin is unwittingly a sharp stab to Ueda’s already bleeding heart.
~~~~~~~~~
At the end of the day Shige and Ueda break the record for fastest Johnny’s out of the Jimusho after dismissal and magically manage not to run into the other in their desperate sprint for home.
Meanwhile Jin drags Kame over to NEWS dressing room for some healthy male talk *Ahem* Gossip *Ahem* and the rest of KAT-TUN decide to follow. Upon lengthy discussion (Jin running in with Kame flailing behind him yelling out “Both Ueda and Shige are in love with Ryo” and Yamapi agreeing) NEWS and KAT-TUN decide something has to be done and Ryo looks like a little kid in a candy shop imagining all the insults Shige and Ueda will exchange over one very sexy Osaka man.
They eventually decide to simply get them all in the same room tomorrow thus KAT-TUN will grab Ueda, drag him to NEWS’ dressing room, everything will be laid on the table and it will be decided which one of them will date Ryo. At this Ryo seems to finally understand where things are headed but hey he’s gay and both Shige and Ueda are hot in a dorky and girly way respectively so he won’t mind screwing the living daylights out of either one. Heck he might even go crazy and do it a few times. Then Ryo has his most brilliant idea ever (sadly); since they both obviously like him so much they couldn’t possibly be against a threesome. Thus his brain and imagination go into overload causing the rest of KAT-TUN and NEWS to be seriously disturbed by his sleazy expression. So much that even Jin and Yamapi, the two most excited idiots, wonder if this is such a good idea.
~~~~~~~~~
The following day their plan goes like clockwork and KAT-TUN and NEWS are soon all in NEWS’ dressing room with Ueda and Shige both feeling extremely uncomfortably and refusing to look at anyone. Meanwhile Ryo is slouched in the single seat acting like he is a King and looking at Ueda and Shige with undisguised amusement, conceit and lust.
Kame decides to get things started by informing everyone they are here because it has come to everybody’s attention that both Ueda and Shige are in love with Ryo and something has to be done. There is absolute silence; stunned on the part of Ueda and Shige who can’t believe everyone thinks they like Ryo and thus instead of the blushing and stuttered confessions Ryo had been looking forward to all last night Ueda and Shige both burst into hysterical laughter. As the rest of KAT-TUN and NEWS look at each other in stunned silence wondering how they got it so wrong, Ryo loses it yelling “What the hell’s so bloody funny about you guys liking me?”
This creates another silence with Ueda and Shige looking at Ryo’s disappointed childish expression. They are stunned that he really can’t seem to believe they’re not in love with the ‘Sexy Osaka Man’ and collapse once again into laughter.
Kame once again tries to take control of the situation and looking at Ueda and Shige asks in a serious tone, “You guys really aren’t in love with Ryo?”
He also looks like he can’t believe it which elicits some quiet giggles from the two in question (You simply can’t laugh properly when faced with a serious Kame). Finally Shige states clearly, certainly and without room for argument, “I’ve never thought of Ryo as anything other than a friend, an arsehole and a conceited bastard”, Ueda adds, “Same here well except for maybe the friend part”.
Ryo of course turns red from anger and demands, “What the fuck? How dare you? Don’t deny it how could you not love this sexy Osaka man?”
This prompts all the others to demand loudly and all at the same time about all the events yesterday which are definite proof that Ueda and Shige are in love with Ryo. After Kame once again takes over he, with help from Yamapi, outlines all the incidents of yesterday. Ueda and Shige stare at each other with a mixture of pain and certainty ‘Damn so he is actually in love with that bastard Ryo!”
Ueda, who is the more sensitive of the two, breaks eye contact first unable to take anymore. He decides to leave before he starts to cry or has to witness anything between Ryo and Shige. The pain in heart seems to spread paralysing his mind from rational thought and thus all he can see in his mind is a happy confession between the guy he can’t stop thinking about and the guy he has never quite forgiven.
As Ueda runs away everyone is left in shock wondering why except for Ryo whose ego never falters as he confidently says to Shige, “Probably decided with his feminine looks he wasn’t man enough for me, which means I’m all yours baby!” This of course comes complete with exaggerated wink and repulsive leer. Shige does the only thing he thinks is reasonable considering the situation - punches Ryo in the face and runs like the wind.
~~~~~~~~~
Thus we have Ueda sobbing his heart out in the bathroom, Shige running all around the Jimusho convinced if he even stops for a second the monster that is Nishikido with have him and he’ll never be able to look his parents in the eyes again, and the rest of KAT-TUN and NEWS wondering what the hell is wrong with Ueda and Shige if they love Ryo why are they so insistent upon denying it.
In fact for the next hour KAT-TUN and NEWS have a very manly bitch-fit about how Ueda and Shige should just realise it’s so obvious they’re in love with Ryo and own up to their feelings as it’s all just getting kind of sad.
~~~~~~~~~
Shige finally starting to calm down and come to his senses realises he’s about an even match for Ryo and will happily beat the crap of the other guy to save him from the hell he saw in Nishikido’s eyes. With that he finally decides it’s safe to relieve his near bursting bladder.
Just as he’s about to leave the bathroom he hears crying from one of the stalls. He has a gut feeling it’s Ueda and his heart wrenches at the pitiful heartbroken sounds Ueda is making because of the lecherous Osaka man. But finally Shige’s brain, which had deserted him when his heart took over, returned and he started to wonder if Ueda really was in love with Ryo. If Ueda was in love with Ryo why did he laugh at the thought along with him, why did he say he wasn’t, why did he run out of the room when Ryo hadn’t said a word about who he liked? But if he wasn’t in love with Ryo why did he act the way he did yesterday, why did he look so sad before he ran from the room and why was he currently in the bathroom sobbing his beautiful heart out? Shige was determined to find out.
“Ueda is that you? Are you okay in there?” Shige calls out desperate to finally know for sure where Ueda’s heart lies.
Ueda heart stops along with his sobs as he hears Shige calling out to him. He can’t help the tiny bit of hope that worms its way into his heart despite his protests. From such simply words Ueda’s mind is in a complete mess and he can’t begin to even think what to say so the only reply Shige receives is louder more heartbreaking sobs.
As Shige’s heart cracks even more he stops doing what he does best, thinking, and simply acts. First he lies on his back and worms his head under the toilet door so that he is staring at the beautiful tear stained face of Tatsuya. Next he grabs hold of one Ueda’s delicate hands. Finally, he begins to pour his heart as tears begin to slide unashamedly down his cheeks.
“Ueda, everyone thinks I’m great with words because I’m studying law but this isn’t Smith v Smith a case about stolen chickens so what I’m about to try and say might come out terrible but please bear with me cause it’s important…….. I ….. I love you. I have for a long time now, though I only realised it when I went to your solo concert and I felt like I really saw you for the first time. You were beautiful, shy yet confident, so damn talented and just perfect. I love your voice, your boxing, your laugh, your piano playing, and your cute bashful smile; I even love your fish lips. I love you so much I got jealous about a damn story where you weren’t mine. I never have and never will like Ryo the way I acted yesterday was simply because I’ve become crazy about you.”
Ueda’s sobs had stopped but his tears hadn’t, only now the light that shined from his eyes clearly showed they were happy tears. With a shaky breath and a wobbling smile he replied with all his heart, “I love you too. Everything about you… Ummphhh”
Ueda was unable to continue as Shige kissed him senseless, having heard all he needed to hear. When they finally broke apart more than a little breathless Ueda felt like he had to continue, “You weren’t the only you got jealous over a fic, I couldn’t bear the thought of you wanting to touch Ryo even in a fic so I stormed out of my dressing room!”
Ueda and Shige stared at each in complete understanding as they finally realised what had happened yesterday and the whole lot of misunderstandings caused by their unclear actions and their idiot band mates. They started laughing and the hurt, pain and stress of the past two days magically washed away.
Slowly the look in their eyes turned from relief to love to want to need and for the second time that day Shige didn’t think he simply grabbed Ueda’s hand leading him to a private place in the Jimusho. Once there Shige whispered, “I want to touch you and only you Ueda Tatsuya” and with that his hands started touching, exploring every inch that was Tatsuya.
~~~~~~~~~
As they slowly make their way back to their respective dressing rooms hand in hand Shige laughs saying, “It will be pretty sad telling our grandchildren about how we got together in a public bathroom!”
Tatsuya stars at him wide eyed wondering if at any moment he’s going to pull off a mask and Bakanishi will be standing there. After a while Tatsuya simply rolls his eyes and informs his boyfriend that, “Are you an idiot, two men can’t have children little own grandchildren”.
Shige just laughs, smiles and says male pregnancy fics have become really popular lately; Tatsuya can’t help laughing along with him.
~~~~~~~~~
As Shige makes it back to NEWS’ dressing room he notices KAT-TUN are still there and everyone looks rather depressed. So he just stands by the door not sure what to do until Ueda appears by his side and asks curiously, “What’s going on? Why is everyone looking so depressed?”
At this everyone looks up at Ueda and Shige but in the end only Kame answers, “Everyone just can’t believe how wrong we were and that neither of you are in love with Ryo. We’re also kind of disappointed I guess that there’s not a cute new couple in the Jimusho.”
With this Shige and Ueda can’t help but stare at each other with wide eyes soon replaced by playful smirks. “Actually,” Shige starts and everyone looks up expectantly, “There is a new couple!”
This news is created by lots of murmurs of excitement and soon Shige has the intense attention of all of KAT-TUN and NEWS as they demand to know who and how.
“Well you guys weren’t wrong when you said me and Ueda were acting jealous” Shige continues smile now wider than ever, “We were jealous, just not because we liked Ryo, we were jealous of Ryo cause we were in love with each other!” And with these final words Shige proudly lifts up their tightly entwined hands and Ueda a shy smile that does nothing to dim the fire in his eyes.
This statement causes chaos and soon everyone is talking and exclaiming at the same time.
Bakanishi and Yamapi try to convince everyone they knew this all along.
Nakamaru and Massu wonder if now is a good time to tell everyone they’ve been together for years now then decide nah they don’t want to steal Shige and Ueda’s thunder.
Koyama tells everyone he can live with this as it is still technically member-ai as they are all members of the Jimusho then he starts crying and tells Shige he’s very happy for him. Shige’s just thankful Koyama has yet to realise Shige failed to mention to him, his best friend that he was in love with a member of KAT-TUN.
Tegoshi just pouts waiting till someone finally gives him some attention again, of course he’s happy for them but it’s got nothing to do with him does it?
Kame quietly congratulates the couple and wishes them happiness.
Junno makes some lame pun about homosexuals and homocide causing Koki to hit him and Ueda to swear not to hang around Junno so much.
Ryo complains that there is no way Shige and Ueda are a good match as they have hardly any fics not to mention a complete lack of a cute nickname and with that he refuses to acknowledge the relationship.
~~~~~~~~~
Until 7 months later an inexplicable increase in Ueda/Shige fics and the cute nickname of Shitatsu forces Ryo to acknowledge their relationship.
The inexplicable increase is of course quite explainable as Ueda and Shige finally got sick of Ryo ignoring their relationship. Actually they got sick of him always hitting on both of them especially when they were together. So they joined a whole bunch of JE fanfiction communities on LJ and a lot of JE fanfiction sites under multiple usernames and started posting lots and lots of Shitatsu fics. Of course so many fics by only two people required a lot of inspiration and as a result Shige and Ueda both agreed they quite liked writing Shitatsu fics. And if anyone ever commented it was weird that almost all the Shitatsu fics were rated NC-17 they simply looked away to hide the faint hint of pink that would without fail tint their cheeks.
~~~~~~~~~
A year after they got together Ueda came home from a doctor’s appointment glaring at Shige as soon as he entered their shared apartment. Without warning he roughly grabbed the front of Shige’s shirt, shoved him up against the nearest wall and started yelling, “Damn you Shige I’m fucking pregnant, pregnant you son of a bitch! What the hell did you do to me?”
Notes: Well I hoped you liked it ^_^ I may continue this and write about Tatsuya being pregnant. Also if anyone wants to request a fic I'm always open to ideas :) I've only written one other fic (an Ohno/Nakai cause they need more love and their own tag) it's over on jent_fanfics.
Group(s): KAT-TUN and NEWS
Pairing(s): Kato Shigeaki / Ueda Tatsuya (ShiTatsu)
Genre(s): Fluff, Romance, and kind of Comedy/Crack
Word Count: 4670
Rating: R? For some coarse language (swearing) and really mild sexual references.
Summary: If you listen to your band mates then you and the person you love are in love with the sexy Osaka man but that’s not true so just who is everyone in love with?
Disclaimer: This fic comes entirely from my imagination and if through some weird impossible coincidence it is actually true it was not because I forced them into it as I don’t own them ^_^
Massu is eating, Tegoshi is feeding him and Koyama is smiling happily at the perfect display of member-ai. Just part of the normal lunch time routine in NEWS’ dressing room. However, Ryo and Yamapi having finished eating and for lack of better things to do decide to see what are the latest fics out on LJ.
“Ahhh Ryo look this one seems interesting”, Yamapi exclaims pointing to the latest Ryoda fic a tantalizing mix of angst and romance, love and hate, sweet and harsh words or so the author claims.
“Ryoda huh?” well it’s not surprising that fish lips can’t even resist me in the virtual world Ryo says with an expression of joy quickly opening the link.
In his corner of the dressing room Shige glances up with a derisive snort and then returns to his law textbook albeit the less interesting of the two texts. Yamapi and Ryo wisely chose to ignore this in favour of the fic and are soon engrossed. As they get to juicy parts Yamapi and Ryo start acting like school boys looking at their dad’s porn for the first time. Before long they’re reading out very loudly the more explicit parts with everybody in the room now listening. Before long Shige can’t help his mind from imagining Ryo and Ueda together doing …… it. As Yamapi reads on Shige’s heart starts to ache and his face starts to get red. Without even realising it he’s glaring at Ryo wanting to beat the crap out of him for touching his Ueda! His Ueda, damn what the hell was he thinking it was just a fic no need to get jealous no need to get jealous at all, Shige berates himself for being so foolish. However, as soon as he looks up to see Ryo’s happy smiling lust filled expression his face is once again red his fist’s clenched and his jealously stronger than ever.
Everyone suddenly turns to look at Shige in surprise as he glares at the computer screen confused except for Ryo who smirks and then swaggers over to Shige.
“Not jealous are we Shige-kun?” Ryo asks as Shige’s jaw drops out of disbelief Ryo actually got something right until Ryo adds laughing, “Come on, it’s written all over your face. Don’t worry I know it’s impossible to resist this sexy Osaka man”.
Now anger quickly replaces the jealously and Shige decides he doesn’t want to hear whatever else Ryo’s ego cares to make up, as it will no doubt be perverted and unable to hear reason, so without a word he quickly leaves the dressing room. The rest of NEWS sit in stunned silence, now their turn to stare at Ryo in disbelief that he actually got something right. That disbelief though is soon replaced by the knowledge that Shige actually likes Ryo and more than one of them can feel a headache coming on.
Yamapi though feels the need to say, “Ryo you didn’t need to tease him that much, it’s not his fault he likes you.” Ryo merely looks smug in response.
~~~~~~~~~
Meanwhile in KAT-TUN’s dressing room Jin has managed to talk Kame into looking for some Akame fics on the internet for a laugh. Jin is pointing out all the Akame fics to Kame laughing at the summary and the NC-17 ratings saying things like ‘I wonder what we do in this one to deserve a rating like that’. Kame simply rolls his eyes in response as he wonders about the sudden increase in Nishikato fics. When he points it out to Jin, Jin simply shrugs and suggests reading one, without waiting for an answer he clicks on a random link and starts to read out loud.
Ueda who was sitting on couch peacefully with his eyes closed now scrunches them shut trying to block out Bakanishi’s voice as all sorts of images of Ryo and Shige float through his head. As the fic gets more explicit Ueda’s face heats up, he starts to feel sick and is close to running out of the room to kill that little midget! How dare he even think of putting his dirty hands on his precious Shige? With a groan Ueda tries to put such petty jealous thoughts about a fictional Ryo out of his mind. His fists unclench, his breathing returns to normal and his face no longer holds traces of red but all this exertion is soon put to waste as Jin starts reading a Nishikato fic where Shige is taking the initiative. The very idea of Shige touching Ryo and wanting to is too much for Ueda’s fragile heart and all commonsense flies out the window. Forgetting Shige is not his and that the story is fictional, Ueda shoots up eyes blazing and storms out the door yelling, “How dare he touch Ryo!”
The silence that results is deafening and unprecedented in KAT-TUN’s dressing room. Also unprecedented is that all five reach a unanimous unbelievably conclusion, Ueda is in love with Ryo! As everyone looks at each other they can see this conclusion mirrored in each other's eyes.
“Damn I can’t believe Ueda is actually an M, I mean he must be after all the shit Ryo’s put him through to still be in love with him,” Jin says finally breaking the silence.
“Mmmmm,” Koki agrees, “Especially to the point he gets jealous of someone touching Ryo in a story he must have it bad!”
Everyone murmurs their agreement and just as Jin excitedly starts to tell the others about his brilliant plan to get Ueda and Ryo together they all hear a loud banging coming from just outside their dressing room.
~~~~~~~~~
Earlier after having left NEWS dressing room, Shige decides he’s in need of a nice refreshing drink and perhaps a mental health check I mean who gets so worked up about a fictional story written by some random teenage girl. He walks slowly glad of the quiet walk that calms his erratic heartbeat and lets him forget about the stupid story. However, when he finally arrives at the vending machines all calm thoughts fly out the window; he sees Ueda, collecting a drink and just about to turn around to face him. Unfortunately, his calm thoughts took all other coherent thoughts with him and all he is left with is nonsensical grunts which he wisely refuses to utter. Thus when Ueda finally turns around and sees him he is confronted by a silent staring Shige who is slowly getter redder and redder.
One thought flies back into Shige’s muddled brain but it’s not much help as if he were to state, ‘I wish the ground would swallow me up right now’ it might cause hurtful misunderstandings. So he simply stands there and notices with some fascination and wonderment that Ueda’s face also seems to be slowly getting redder and redder.
Ueda couldn’t believe it when he turned around to find Shige, Shige, staring at him with a faint blush on his cheeks. Unfortunately he seemed to catch what Shige had and found himself unable to do anything except imitate the other man. Thus if anyone were to chance upon them they would find two adult men staring intensely at each other with extremely red faces.
The one thought that entered Ueda’s mind after a while was only very slightly better than Shige’s and that was RUN!! And so with a slight bow Ueda did just that with a rather large sense of cowardice following right behind.
Shige, slightly confused, hurt and relieved decides it’s best to simply grab a drink and then walk to someplace that is not NEWS’ dressing room.
~~~~~~~~~
Ueda having totally embarrassed himself in front of the guy he likes, because of Bakanishi and the rest and their stupid idea that reading fanfiction about themselves is fun, decides if he doesn’t want to end up in jail for homocide (Because everyone except for Junno are homosexuals! Arghhh that’s worse than one of Junno’s puns!) decides to head to the NEWS dressing room hoping that a few arguments with Ryo will make him feel better whilst conveniently forgetting that it’s Shige’s dressing room.
~~~~~~~~~
At the same time Shige is once again putting himself down this time for making the guy he likes feel so uncomfortable he had to run away. Not to mention just one look at Tatsuya and his face turns bright red like some high school girl in bestselling shojo manga. He stops to bang his head harshly against a wall when suddenly a hand grabs his wrists and yanks him into a nearby room. Once he has his bearings he realises he’s in KAT-TUN’s dressing room and for one horribly second he wonders if Ueda is here. His heart calms down when he realises he isn’t.
~~~~~~~~~
Meanwhile Ueda in NEWS’s room is being told all about how Ryo and Pi were reading Ryoda fics and how Shige got all annoyed and jealous and thus it’s pretty obvious he likes Ryo. Ueda chest starts to ache and he can’t even come up with an insult though Ryo and his big ego are pretty much asking for one. But why else would Shige act like that? And that might also explain his strange behaviour at the vending machine, could it actually have been anger in his eyes too or just embarrassment as Ueda made Shige remember how he’d got jealous over a silly story. In the end Ueda can’t help but conclude that Shige must really like Ryo as then it all makes perfect sense.
Ueda of course feels compelled to ask what Ryo is going to do and Ryo, being Ryo, just gives Ueda an infuriating smirk whilst saying nonchalantly, “It’s none of your business is it fish lips? Maybe me and Shige will have some fun together if you get what I mean?”
One look at his face and even the densest of people could have understood Ryo’s meaning and thus rightly so Ueda get’s upset on Shige’s behalf, imagining a used heartbroken Shige he turns red with barely restrained anger. Glaring at Ryo he tries to say, ‘If you dare hurt the one I love I will never forgive you!” Unfortunately for Ueda in his enraged state it becomes, “GRHHHHHHHHHH I love GRHHHHHHH URGHHH you”. And thus when Ueda storms out the whole of NEWS think Ueda was jealous and also likes Ryo.
~~~~~~~~~
In KAT-TUN’s dressing room Kame is asking Shige why he was hitting his head against the wall, having just hit his head against the wall and not thinking very well Shige blurts out “I just ran into Ueda….” But that’s as far as he gets as Jin can’t resist telling Shige about how they were reading Nishikato fics and Ueda got all jealous and stormed out whilst glaring and muttering stuff about how dare Shige touch Ryo. Therefore it’s perfectly obvious that Ueda is desperately in love with Ryo. Despite his brains Shige can’t think of a single reason to dispute this.
So his heart starts to ache and he blurts out “He can’t like Ryo! Why? Why Ryo?”
Everybody interprets this to mean Shige also likes Ryo and therefore isn’t happy to hear about competition. Of course this isn’t immediately obvious from just those words so perhaps Ryo’s large ego and his constant reminders that he is ‘The sexy Osaka man’ actually had an effect on everyone. To their credit they were half right, Shige wasn’t very happy to hear about his competition especially in the form of the Sexy Osaka Man.
When Jin finally breaks the silence to actually ask him if he likes Ryo Shige’s too caught up in his own thoughts and just assumes they mean as friends since he and Ryo haven’t always got on perfectly and replies with a dismissive wave of his hand as he leaves the room “Of course”.
~~~~~~~~~
Shige and Ueda manage to make it back to their own dressing rooms without crossing paths.
Shige once he gets back to his spends the rest of the day staring at his “competition” and quickly glancing away whenever Ryo catches him staring, sometimes his face is bright red for getting caught and sometimes it’s bright red for the things he imagines happening between Ryo and Ueda. Of course he blames those thoughts entirely on the images Ryo and Pi had such fun reading out earlier as they just won’t stop torturing him. It also doesn’t help that whenever this happens Ryo has a huge smirk on his face and makes a remark to Yamapi about how Ueda was just in here confessing his love.
Ueda doesn’t have it much better but at least he doesn’t have to deal with his “competition”. No he only has to put up with Bakanishi and his relentless teasing about how he likes Ryo and that he better watch out because Shige’s also after him! Each ‘light hearted’ tease from Jin is unwittingly a sharp stab to Ueda’s already bleeding heart.
~~~~~~~~~
At the end of the day Shige and Ueda break the record for fastest Johnny’s out of the Jimusho after dismissal and magically manage not to run into the other in their desperate sprint for home.
Meanwhile Jin drags Kame over to NEWS dressing room for some healthy male talk *Ahem* Gossip *Ahem* and the rest of KAT-TUN decide to follow. Upon lengthy discussion (Jin running in with Kame flailing behind him yelling out “Both Ueda and Shige are in love with Ryo” and Yamapi agreeing) NEWS and KAT-TUN decide something has to be done and Ryo looks like a little kid in a candy shop imagining all the insults Shige and Ueda will exchange over one very sexy Osaka man.
They eventually decide to simply get them all in the same room tomorrow thus KAT-TUN will grab Ueda, drag him to NEWS’ dressing room, everything will be laid on the table and it will be decided which one of them will date Ryo. At this Ryo seems to finally understand where things are headed but hey he’s gay and both Shige and Ueda are hot in a dorky and girly way respectively so he won’t mind screwing the living daylights out of either one. Heck he might even go crazy and do it a few times. Then Ryo has his most brilliant idea ever (sadly); since they both obviously like him so much they couldn’t possibly be against a threesome. Thus his brain and imagination go into overload causing the rest of KAT-TUN and NEWS to be seriously disturbed by his sleazy expression. So much that even Jin and Yamapi, the two most excited idiots, wonder if this is such a good idea.
~~~~~~~~~
The following day their plan goes like clockwork and KAT-TUN and NEWS are soon all in NEWS’ dressing room with Ueda and Shige both feeling extremely uncomfortably and refusing to look at anyone. Meanwhile Ryo is slouched in the single seat acting like he is a King and looking at Ueda and Shige with undisguised amusement, conceit and lust.
Kame decides to get things started by informing everyone they are here because it has come to everybody’s attention that both Ueda and Shige are in love with Ryo and something has to be done. There is absolute silence; stunned on the part of Ueda and Shige who can’t believe everyone thinks they like Ryo and thus instead of the blushing and stuttered confessions Ryo had been looking forward to all last night Ueda and Shige both burst into hysterical laughter. As the rest of KAT-TUN and NEWS look at each other in stunned silence wondering how they got it so wrong, Ryo loses it yelling “What the hell’s so bloody funny about you guys liking me?”
This creates another silence with Ueda and Shige looking at Ryo’s disappointed childish expression. They are stunned that he really can’t seem to believe they’re not in love with the ‘Sexy Osaka Man’ and collapse once again into laughter.
Kame once again tries to take control of the situation and looking at Ueda and Shige asks in a serious tone, “You guys really aren’t in love with Ryo?”
He also looks like he can’t believe it which elicits some quiet giggles from the two in question (You simply can’t laugh properly when faced with a serious Kame). Finally Shige states clearly, certainly and without room for argument, “I’ve never thought of Ryo as anything other than a friend, an arsehole and a conceited bastard”, Ueda adds, “Same here well except for maybe the friend part”.
Ryo of course turns red from anger and demands, “What the fuck? How dare you? Don’t deny it how could you not love this sexy Osaka man?”
This prompts all the others to demand loudly and all at the same time about all the events yesterday which are definite proof that Ueda and Shige are in love with Ryo. After Kame once again takes over he, with help from Yamapi, outlines all the incidents of yesterday. Ueda and Shige stare at each other with a mixture of pain and certainty ‘Damn so he is actually in love with that bastard Ryo!”
Ueda, who is the more sensitive of the two, breaks eye contact first unable to take anymore. He decides to leave before he starts to cry or has to witness anything between Ryo and Shige. The pain in heart seems to spread paralysing his mind from rational thought and thus all he can see in his mind is a happy confession between the guy he can’t stop thinking about and the guy he has never quite forgiven.
As Ueda runs away everyone is left in shock wondering why except for Ryo whose ego never falters as he confidently says to Shige, “Probably decided with his feminine looks he wasn’t man enough for me, which means I’m all yours baby!” This of course comes complete with exaggerated wink and repulsive leer. Shige does the only thing he thinks is reasonable considering the situation - punches Ryo in the face and runs like the wind.
~~~~~~~~~
Thus we have Ueda sobbing his heart out in the bathroom, Shige running all around the Jimusho convinced if he even stops for a second the monster that is Nishikido with have him and he’ll never be able to look his parents in the eyes again, and the rest of KAT-TUN and NEWS wondering what the hell is wrong with Ueda and Shige if they love Ryo why are they so insistent upon denying it.
In fact for the next hour KAT-TUN and NEWS have a very manly bitch-fit about how Ueda and Shige should just realise it’s so obvious they’re in love with Ryo and own up to their feelings as it’s all just getting kind of sad.
~~~~~~~~~
Shige finally starting to calm down and come to his senses realises he’s about an even match for Ryo and will happily beat the crap of the other guy to save him from the hell he saw in Nishikido’s eyes. With that he finally decides it’s safe to relieve his near bursting bladder.
Just as he’s about to leave the bathroom he hears crying from one of the stalls. He has a gut feeling it’s Ueda and his heart wrenches at the pitiful heartbroken sounds Ueda is making because of the lecherous Osaka man. But finally Shige’s brain, which had deserted him when his heart took over, returned and he started to wonder if Ueda really was in love with Ryo. If Ueda was in love with Ryo why did he laugh at the thought along with him, why did he say he wasn’t, why did he run out of the room when Ryo hadn’t said a word about who he liked? But if he wasn’t in love with Ryo why did he act the way he did yesterday, why did he look so sad before he ran from the room and why was he currently in the bathroom sobbing his beautiful heart out? Shige was determined to find out.
“Ueda is that you? Are you okay in there?” Shige calls out desperate to finally know for sure where Ueda’s heart lies.
Ueda heart stops along with his sobs as he hears Shige calling out to him. He can’t help the tiny bit of hope that worms its way into his heart despite his protests. From such simply words Ueda’s mind is in a complete mess and he can’t begin to even think what to say so the only reply Shige receives is louder more heartbreaking sobs.
As Shige’s heart cracks even more he stops doing what he does best, thinking, and simply acts. First he lies on his back and worms his head under the toilet door so that he is staring at the beautiful tear stained face of Tatsuya. Next he grabs hold of one Ueda’s delicate hands. Finally, he begins to pour his heart as tears begin to slide unashamedly down his cheeks.
“Ueda, everyone thinks I’m great with words because I’m studying law but this isn’t Smith v Smith a case about stolen chickens so what I’m about to try and say might come out terrible but please bear with me cause it’s important…….. I ….. I love you. I have for a long time now, though I only realised it when I went to your solo concert and I felt like I really saw you for the first time. You were beautiful, shy yet confident, so damn talented and just perfect. I love your voice, your boxing, your laugh, your piano playing, and your cute bashful smile; I even love your fish lips. I love you so much I got jealous about a damn story where you weren’t mine. I never have and never will like Ryo the way I acted yesterday was simply because I’ve become crazy about you.”
Ueda’s sobs had stopped but his tears hadn’t, only now the light that shined from his eyes clearly showed they were happy tears. With a shaky breath and a wobbling smile he replied with all his heart, “I love you too. Everything about you… Ummphhh”
Ueda was unable to continue as Shige kissed him senseless, having heard all he needed to hear. When they finally broke apart more than a little breathless Ueda felt like he had to continue, “You weren’t the only you got jealous over a fic, I couldn’t bear the thought of you wanting to touch Ryo even in a fic so I stormed out of my dressing room!”
Ueda and Shige stared at each in complete understanding as they finally realised what had happened yesterday and the whole lot of misunderstandings caused by their unclear actions and their idiot band mates. They started laughing and the hurt, pain and stress of the past two days magically washed away.
Slowly the look in their eyes turned from relief to love to want to need and for the second time that day Shige didn’t think he simply grabbed Ueda’s hand leading him to a private place in the Jimusho. Once there Shige whispered, “I want to touch you and only you Ueda Tatsuya” and with that his hands started touching, exploring every inch that was Tatsuya.
~~~~~~~~~
As they slowly make their way back to their respective dressing rooms hand in hand Shige laughs saying, “It will be pretty sad telling our grandchildren about how we got together in a public bathroom!”
Tatsuya stars at him wide eyed wondering if at any moment he’s going to pull off a mask and Bakanishi will be standing there. After a while Tatsuya simply rolls his eyes and informs his boyfriend that, “Are you an idiot, two men can’t have children little own grandchildren”.
Shige just laughs, smiles and says male pregnancy fics have become really popular lately; Tatsuya can’t help laughing along with him.
~~~~~~~~~
As Shige makes it back to NEWS’ dressing room he notices KAT-TUN are still there and everyone looks rather depressed. So he just stands by the door not sure what to do until Ueda appears by his side and asks curiously, “What’s going on? Why is everyone looking so depressed?”
At this everyone looks up at Ueda and Shige but in the end only Kame answers, “Everyone just can’t believe how wrong we were and that neither of you are in love with Ryo. We’re also kind of disappointed I guess that there’s not a cute new couple in the Jimusho.”
With this Shige and Ueda can’t help but stare at each other with wide eyes soon replaced by playful smirks. “Actually,” Shige starts and everyone looks up expectantly, “There is a new couple!”
This news is created by lots of murmurs of excitement and soon Shige has the intense attention of all of KAT-TUN and NEWS as they demand to know who and how.
“Well you guys weren’t wrong when you said me and Ueda were acting jealous” Shige continues smile now wider than ever, “We were jealous, just not because we liked Ryo, we were jealous of Ryo cause we were in love with each other!” And with these final words Shige proudly lifts up their tightly entwined hands and Ueda a shy smile that does nothing to dim the fire in his eyes.
This statement causes chaos and soon everyone is talking and exclaiming at the same time.
Bakanishi and Yamapi try to convince everyone they knew this all along.
Nakamaru and Massu wonder if now is a good time to tell everyone they’ve been together for years now then decide nah they don’t want to steal Shige and Ueda’s thunder.
Koyama tells everyone he can live with this as it is still technically member-ai as they are all members of the Jimusho then he starts crying and tells Shige he’s very happy for him. Shige’s just thankful Koyama has yet to realise Shige failed to mention to him, his best friend that he was in love with a member of KAT-TUN.
Tegoshi just pouts waiting till someone finally gives him some attention again, of course he’s happy for them but it’s got nothing to do with him does it?
Kame quietly congratulates the couple and wishes them happiness.
Junno makes some lame pun about homosexuals and homocide causing Koki to hit him and Ueda to swear not to hang around Junno so much.
Ryo complains that there is no way Shige and Ueda are a good match as they have hardly any fics not to mention a complete lack of a cute nickname and with that he refuses to acknowledge the relationship.
~~~~~~~~~
Until 7 months later an inexplicable increase in Ueda/Shige fics and the cute nickname of Shitatsu forces Ryo to acknowledge their relationship.
The inexplicable increase is of course quite explainable as Ueda and Shige finally got sick of Ryo ignoring their relationship. Actually they got sick of him always hitting on both of them especially when they were together. So they joined a whole bunch of JE fanfiction communities on LJ and a lot of JE fanfiction sites under multiple usernames and started posting lots and lots of Shitatsu fics. Of course so many fics by only two people required a lot of inspiration and as a result Shige and Ueda both agreed they quite liked writing Shitatsu fics. And if anyone ever commented it was weird that almost all the Shitatsu fics were rated NC-17 they simply looked away to hide the faint hint of pink that would without fail tint their cheeks.
~~~~~~~~~
A year after they got together Ueda came home from a doctor’s appointment glaring at Shige as soon as he entered their shared apartment. Without warning he roughly grabbed the front of Shige’s shirt, shoved him up against the nearest wall and started yelling, “Damn you Shige I’m fucking pregnant, pregnant you son of a bitch! What the hell did you do to me?”
Notes: Well I hoped you liked it ^_^ I may continue this and write about Tatsuya being pregnant. Also if anyone wants to request a fic I'm always open to ideas :) I've only written one other fic (an Ohno/Nakai cause they need more love and their own tag) it's over on jent_fanfics.