Fandom #10
Title: Restless Night
Fandom: Liar Game (J-dorama canon)
Summary: Nao Kanzaki's thoughts as she lies awake in bed during the Minority Game.
Notes: This is an awesome series and I recommend it to anyone who likes games that screw with people's heads.
Nao had trouble sleeping that night.
She trusted Akiyama and Tsukahara to win the game for their team. In fact, the thought that they might fail didn't cross her mind. They had all signed a contract to help one another, and Akiyama and Tsukahara were such sweet guys when you got to know them... it was silly to think they were going to betray anybody.
That wasn't what kept her awake.
She was kept awake by the memories of what she had to do to Mr Fujisawa. She felt so ashamed of the trickery, even though she absolved her guilt the moment she was announced winner, but the memories of putting him through that much stress made her want to get up and apologise to him.
Nao had made her way over to his home once before, but the windows had been shuttered up, and a big For Sale sign had been erected in the front garden. She couldn't help but feel responsible for this.
Even so, that wasn't the only reason she couldn't sleep.
She knew that somewhere out there, there were twelve other people who were having sleepless nights, too.
The dozen people outside of her team, who had legitimately lost the game and were now each shouldering debts of a hundred million yen. Akiyama's strategy required exactly eight people to work, but that meant fourteen people would lose out. He had just shrugged his shoulders when she pointed this out to him, and said it was their lookout. Nao didn't like Akiyama's flippant attitude to other people's wellbeing. But she also didn't like causing trouble, so she stayed quiet, and let the guilt and politeness wrestle in her stomach.
She imagined what these dozen other people were doing right now. Nao had spoken to a geeky looking guy with glasses, and a stout woman wearing bright colours. She found these conversations the hardest, because the Game was underway, and they were passing time with politeness, knowing they were inevitably going to stab one another in the back.
Only Akiyama and that lady with the sunglasses looked unphased the whole afternoon. Nao felt a twinge of fear toward the young woman they had branded 'X', and wondered how somebody could rob another woman of such a huge amount of money, and not even care. How did X manage that?
Nao reflected, while she was trying to sleep, that her role in refusing to ally with any other girls was similar in many ways. Even though she and X never held a conversation, between them, they had destroyed the lives of the other women.
That stung worst of all. Akiyama didn't care. Nao wondered if he had another trick up his sleeve, but he refused to say anything more. It was his way of doing things, and she felt it best to leave things be.
But even so... a hundred million yen...
She couldn't do it to Mr Fujisawa, and she wouldn't do it to perfectly nice strangers. They all claimed to be victims, and they were, right? Akiyama didn't agree. He said they won their first rounds for a reason, and the reason wasn't for being a victim.
What Nao really wanted was the confidence and faith in the kindness of strangers, because that was the world she lived in, and in that world, she would be able to think for herself and make everybody happy, the ways he wanted them to be. Here, it was a cold and cruel existence full of deceit and betrayal and trickery, and Nao hated being so gulliable, because it made her feel stupid.
She held faith that all people were good within their souls.
Presently, her faith was running low. She needed to see Akiyama and Tsukahara win the game tomorrow. She needed to know the sleepless nights were justified.
So she would get up early and watch him play his final move. Then she would follow his advice, withdraw with her share of the winnings, and never look back at the nightmare.
She lay her head on the pillow, and dozed into a light sleep, filled with the faces of those hurt by this dreadful game, and woke up sorrowful. She yawned, and opened the curtains, to be bathed in early morning sunlight.
The sky shined golden, and Nao Kanzaki's faith was replenished.
Fandom: Liar Game (J-dorama canon)
Summary: Nao Kanzaki's thoughts as she lies awake in bed during the Minority Game.
Notes: This is an awesome series and I recommend it to anyone who likes games that screw with people's heads.
Nao had trouble sleeping that night.
She trusted Akiyama and Tsukahara to win the game for their team. In fact, the thought that they might fail didn't cross her mind. They had all signed a contract to help one another, and Akiyama and Tsukahara were such sweet guys when you got to know them... it was silly to think they were going to betray anybody.
That wasn't what kept her awake.
She was kept awake by the memories of what she had to do to Mr Fujisawa. She felt so ashamed of the trickery, even though she absolved her guilt the moment she was announced winner, but the memories of putting him through that much stress made her want to get up and apologise to him.
Nao had made her way over to his home once before, but the windows had been shuttered up, and a big For Sale sign had been erected in the front garden. She couldn't help but feel responsible for this.
Even so, that wasn't the only reason she couldn't sleep.
She knew that somewhere out there, there were twelve other people who were having sleepless nights, too.
The dozen people outside of her team, who had legitimately lost the game and were now each shouldering debts of a hundred million yen. Akiyama's strategy required exactly eight people to work, but that meant fourteen people would lose out. He had just shrugged his shoulders when she pointed this out to him, and said it was their lookout. Nao didn't like Akiyama's flippant attitude to other people's wellbeing. But she also didn't like causing trouble, so she stayed quiet, and let the guilt and politeness wrestle in her stomach.
She imagined what these dozen other people were doing right now. Nao had spoken to a geeky looking guy with glasses, and a stout woman wearing bright colours. She found these conversations the hardest, because the Game was underway, and they were passing time with politeness, knowing they were inevitably going to stab one another in the back.
Only Akiyama and that lady with the sunglasses looked unphased the whole afternoon. Nao felt a twinge of fear toward the young woman they had branded 'X', and wondered how somebody could rob another woman of such a huge amount of money, and not even care. How did X manage that?
Nao reflected, while she was trying to sleep, that her role in refusing to ally with any other girls was similar in many ways. Even though she and X never held a conversation, between them, they had destroyed the lives of the other women.
That stung worst of all. Akiyama didn't care. Nao wondered if he had another trick up his sleeve, but he refused to say anything more. It was his way of doing things, and she felt it best to leave things be.
But even so... a hundred million yen...
She couldn't do it to Mr Fujisawa, and she wouldn't do it to perfectly nice strangers. They all claimed to be victims, and they were, right? Akiyama didn't agree. He said they won their first rounds for a reason, and the reason wasn't for being a victim.
What Nao really wanted was the confidence and faith in the kindness of strangers, because that was the world she lived in, and in that world, she would be able to think for herself and make everybody happy, the ways he wanted them to be. Here, it was a cold and cruel existence full of deceit and betrayal and trickery, and Nao hated being so gulliable, because it made her feel stupid.
She held faith that all people were good within their souls.
Presently, her faith was running low. She needed to see Akiyama and Tsukahara win the game tomorrow. She needed to know the sleepless nights were justified.
So she would get up early and watch him play his final move. Then she would follow his advice, withdraw with her share of the winnings, and never look back at the nightmare.
She lay her head on the pillow, and dozed into a light sleep, filled with the faces of those hurt by this dreadful game, and woke up sorrowful. She yawned, and opened the curtains, to be bathed in early morning sunlight.
The sky shined golden, and Nao Kanzaki's faith was replenished.