FIC: Call It Desperation

[3988akasha]

Title: Call It Desperation

Author:  3988akasha

Rating: NC-17

Word Count: 6,750

Warnings: Angry Sex, Cheating, Angst, Powerply, Humiliation

Pairings: James McAvoy/Michael Fassbender

Beta:   bones_2_be

Disclaimer: I own my story. The characters in the story belong to themselves.

Summary:  “Do you know what you’re doing, James?” Michael asked, hoping it sounded as casual as he intended. He was unsure of what answer he wanted.

“I’m just giving us both what we want,” James whispered, “What we’ve wanted since filming. What we’ve been careening towards since the scene we filmed in bed, when we were moments, heartbeats away from this very position.”

Call It Desperation

When There’s Too Much Left Unsaid

As he turned his key in the lock of the front door, he could feel the anger boiling right beneath the surface of his skin. The door slammed shut behind him, and hands, hot as coals, shoved him into it. Before he could verbalize his shock, warm, demanding lips descended upon his own. His hands grappled for the intruder's shoulders, intending to shove him off, but he wasn't fast enough. With one hand, his captor locked his arms above his head; the other remained heavy on his hip, effectively immobilizing him. The assault on his mouth continued; teeth nipped at his lips while a tongue brutally thrust into his mouth.

He struggled to maintain his anger, to use it as a shield against the want tightening in his stomach; against the want spreading through his veins like cancer. As if privy to his thoughts, his assailant bit painfully into his lower lip, causing him to moan as he felt his pants tighten against his dick. He thrust his hips forward; it wasn’t much friction, but it made him feel more in control - less passive. The lips against his smirked before abandoning his lips in favor of that spot right below his ear.

“Don’t speak, James.”

The command went straight to his dick. He hated the traitorous appendage. He banged his head against the door, unintentionally offering more of his neck, which had been mostly hidden by his collared shirt. Even through the haze of lust, he could feel his anger bubbling closer to the surface, spurred on by the harshly whispered command. In spite of, or maybe, just maybe, because of his anger, James remained quiet. He moaned deep in his throat as teeth bit into the tender skin behind his ear. It wasn’t hard enough to leave a mark, not yet. It was simply a promise, or a threat. James realized he couldn’t tell. He wanted to retaliate, to move away. He couldn’t. And it had nothing to do with the hands restraining him.

He writhed under the attention, the reality so much better, and worse, than his fantasies had been. Wasn’t that really the source of his anger? Too much, too late? But, right now, it didn’t matter because he was everywhere, he surrounded James, kept up a relentless assault on his senses. His lips continued to trace the contours of James’ neck, his tongue darting beneath the collar of James’ shirt, tasting the skin there. Slowly, the hand on his hip began to inch the material of James’ shirt out of its careful tuck. He hissed when questing fingers began to trace the exposed skin above his hipbone. James wiggled helplessly, the touch both ticklish and devilishly arousing.

“Stay.”

James meant to question the order, he did, but Michael’s earlier admonition for silence stopped him. Slowly, teasingly, the fingers worked open all the buttons of his shirt. He shivered as goosebumps erupted on his newly exposed skin, his body lurching against the one holding him. He wanted to shove Michael away; he wanted to pull him closer. Capable of neither, he whimpered pitifully when a clever tongue swirled around one of his nipples.

“I ca - ammmhm…”

Whatever protest James had been attempting to articulate dissolved into a moan when teeth bit his nipple sharply. Using his tie, Michael’s hand traveled up his chest quickly, and tugged the knot loose, only to wrap the expensive silk in a fierce grip and tug James’ face forward a bit.

“I told you not to speak, James.”

James closed his eyes and bent his head back, a frustrated growl rumbled from his chest. The movement caused the tie to tighten around the front of his neck, the material a slight pressure against his Adam’s apple. He dropped his hands to his side, uncaring of the standing order to keep them raised above his head; they curled into fists, emotions warring through his body. He couldn’t seem to muster enough restraint to push through the mind-blowing arousal suffusing his being. The voice in the back of his mind, the one not obscured by his dick, berated him for his weakness, reminding him of things he wanted to forget. Maybe he shouldn’t just ignore it because he wanted to, the anger was real, it pulsed in his veins, rooted in truths he couldn’t simply ignore. He opened his mouth, intending to speak clearly, demand some personal space, but then he felt the gentle kisses along his neck, where the tie was still secure against his skin. The feeble protest died before he closed his mouth. He felt the smirk against his lips, but couldn’t gather an appropriate level of indignation; he was pathetically weak.

He hissed through his teeth, jaw clenched tightly in a futile attempt to assuage the heat igniting his body, when a warm hand covered his dick, gently rubbing through the material of his pants. Lacking any hint of finesse, he rocked his hips into not nearly enough contact, needy noises escaping the back of his throat.

A foreign noise tickled the back of his mind. At first, he simply dismissed it, distracted by the mouth currently sucking wetly on his earlobe, but the incessant noise continued, breaking the spell. James blinked several times, the world once more coming into focus. He stared at the man in front of him, eyes locked while he reached into his pocket for his phone. The reality of his situation hit him square in the chest and for a terrible moment, he thought he’d pass out from the wave of guilt which engulfed his body.

“Can I call you back, sweetheart?” James was proud of himself for not choking on the words.

As he hung up, he closed his eyes, shamed beyond anything he’d ever felt.

“You need to leave,” James whispered, unable to look up.

“James - ”

His eyes snapped up at the suddenly docile tone, almost hesitantly repentant. He was looking at him so earnestly, too much and too little in the look. James looked away first.

“Leave now, Michael. Just go.”

“That’s not going to fix anything, James.”

Instantly, he felt the dam that had been holding his anger at bay snap. His head jerked up and for one of the first times in his life, he wanted to beat someone senseless. Briefly, the edges of his vision tinged pink. His hands closed into fists, for a completely different reason. James struggled to keep his voice even.

“Leave before there’s nothing left to fix.”

James took some sadistic pleasure in seeing the way Michael’s jaw tightened as he nodded once and let himself out. Only once he was gone did James have the presence of mind to wonder at Michael’s sudden appearance. After all, the bonds that tied him also tied Michael, even if the bonds were slightly different. As he looked down at his current, disheveled state of undress, the ties that bind analogy suddenly felt less profound; his tie lay against his bare chest, a silent accuser.

“Fuck.”

Change into Something Worth Keeping

Things weren’t exactly going how he’d planned them out in his mind. Sure, he was levelheaded enough to have expected some resistance; but frankly, being severed off so completely was unduly harsh. His thoughts were jumbled as he walked into his home; he jumped when the lamp turned on.

“James, you scared the shit out of me!”

“Why?”

Michael held a hand over his racing heart, eyes wide. James was sitting on his couch, shadowed by the low glow of the end table lamp. While the sight was enough to make Michael need to readjust himself, the tone sent unpleasant shivers racing up his spine. For several long seconds, he simply stared at James.

“I want you.”

There, it was simple. He’d said it.

“How?”

Michael shook the first dozen scenarios of fucking James into the wall out of his mind, that wasn’t what James meant and now was not the time to be playfully obtuse. James leaned forward, elbows resting on his knees and Michael felt his breath leave him. The same tie hung around James’ neck. Any blood he’d had above his belt immediately pooled in his groin. He now had a Technicolor image of James on his knees, nothing but that damn tie, Michael’s hand wrapped around the tie, dick thrusting in and out of James’…

Needing the relief, Michael pressed the heel of his hand to his crotch. He barely managed to repress the smirk as he saw James’ eyes follow his hand. Instead of commenting or doing something he’d regret, mainly because James would leave, he filed that little bit of information away for later use. He hoped.

“We broke up, James.”

James didn’t answer him. Instead, he leaned back, once more allowing the shadows to cover his face. He wanted to reach out, grab the tie and yank him back into focus. He shoved his hands in his pockets.

“Earlier?”

Michael sighed. He really wished James would end the monosyllabic, cryptic game of twenty questions. Also, he hated that James could make one word questions so infuriatingly uncomfortable to answer.

“I wanted you then, too.”

He didn’t have to see James’ face to know he was rolling his eyes. The answer was inane, but damn it they’d had this argument before, in fact, they’d been having this fight for months.

“Did you tell him the same thing?”

Michael had no response. He’d heard the question before, and not from James. He felt the situation spiraling out of his control, not that there’d been much before now.

“He break-up with you, Michael?” James asked, tone biting. “He finally get tired of my name on your lips instead of his?”

Michael wanted him to stop, but the words were lodged in his throat. Now James was standing in the light, and Micahel’s breath caught with his words somewhere near his esophagus. He was wearing the tie with a pair of jeans. He didn’t know how he’d missed the small fact that James was shirtless.

“Figured you had a thing for the tie.”

So he’d been caught staring, James’ derisive tone probably no more than he deserved. Was that was this was? James mind-fucking him by showing up all stealth and shirtless. The idea forced himself to adjust himself again. But, if James thought he’d somehow get even, or be allowed to break into his house just to tease him, he was horribly mistaken.

“Did he wear a lot of ties for you, Michael?”

Michael watched James caress the material of the tie between his fingers. He slid it between his thumb and first finger, pulling the tie away from the broad expanse of chest exposed to the soft-glow of the lamp. Michael wanted to lick every inch of it until James writhed and moaned into a helpless ball of need, only when he was begging would Michael give him the attention he wanted. James continued to advance on him. Michael stood his ground, primarily to keep himself from doing exactly what he was imagining. There’d be time for that later. He hoped.

“Don’t do this, James.”

He hated the gravely undertone of his voice, but at least it was even. Considering how hard he was, he’d accept his small victory. Now, James stood about six inches from him, eyes full of righteous anger, face flushed nicely.

James smirked at him.

“Isn’t it a little late for that, Michael?”

Indeed, it was, Michael decided. He reached out and grabbed James’ tie, he savored the texture of the material between his fingers before he used it to reel James to him. He expected resistance as he tugged James forward. Michael brought his free hand up, cradling the back of James’ head. James stared at him; Michael noticed the fire burning there, the deep anger, the hurt. Hopefully, it matched his own. His self-anger for being unable to do without James, irrational anger at James for daring to already have someone else, and undirected anger at them both for their current situation.

When he crushed his lips against James’, he intended to punish him, to vent his frustration upon his lips. Michael knew he’d appreciate the sight of James’ red, swollen lips. He worked his fingers under the tie, the knot comfortable in his palm, the back of his knuckles pressing into James’ neck, near his throat. Feeling James shiver, Michael moved one of his knuckles up and down, tracing the line of a dominate vein. The hand on James’ neck trailed up until Michael had a fist full of James’ hair. He used his leverage to change the angle of the kiss, tilting James’ head to give him better access to his mouth.

To his delight, James didn’t remain passive. Michael felt James’ fingers scramble along his back, seeking purchase, finding none. He enjoyed the power of knowing he’d reversed their roles, once more in control. He savored the feel of James’ warm body, and allowed James to pull him closer. James’ hands were warm on his ass, their bodies aligned, one of Michael’s legs slotted between James’. The new position allowed Michael to rock his hips gently against James, ensuring James could feel how hard he was, ensuring James knew exactly what he did to him.

“This what you wanted, Michael?” James asked when they broke apart to breathe.

Michael could feel the anger coiled tightly in the lines of James’ body. He felt James’ pulse quicken where his knuckle still pressed into the skin of his neck. James rocked his hips sinfully, as if to prove his point, a needless gesture. But, when Michael noticed the calculated line of James’ swollen lips, he felt his control slip again. Perturbed by how easily James could shift the foundation of his world with a single question, his own anger rose to meet James’.

Determined to regain equal footing, Michael shoved James away, sending him sprawling on the couch. Before James could follow through with the intent burning in his eyes, Michael was towering above him, hand fisted around the tie. He yanked James forward, the leverage pulling James to his feet once more. Until there was no space between their noses, until they breathed the same air.

“Does she know you came here, to me? Where does she think you are, James? What lies did you whisper into her ear as you slid from her bed?”

The self-righteous anger in James’ eyes faded for a moment; replaced by such a despondent look Michael couldn’t properly enjoy it. Hated James all the more for it. His free hand moved down and squeezed James’ dick until James’ eyes fluttered shut. Michael moved his lips to James’ ear.

“Can she do this to you, James? Are you even able to get it up for her?”

When James pushed away, Michael released him. He’d proven his point. Although, when the door closed softly behind James, he wondered if his victory was worth it.

I’ll Take Whatever I Can Take, Whenever I Can Take It

No matter how many times he told himself to stop, he couldn’t. He continued to wonder why the smooth hand felt wrong in his. He didn’t like his conclusions. His conclusions told him it was because it wasn’t his. Squeezing his eyes shut, he pretended that would keep him from thinking about him. To further delude himself, he gave her hand a gentle squeeze, feeling guilty when she gave him a bright smile in return.

The invitingly warm sun tricked James into thinking a walk to the coffee shop would be good, fun even - that was fifteen minutes ago. Before he saw Michael. Unfortunately, so did she. And since she knew absolutely nothing about his dalliances with Michael, she thought nothing of waving to him. Michael knew better, but he waved them over, all congenial smiles. At least he wasn’t wearing the tie. Not that its absence kept Michael from raking his eyes over James’ body. He maintained eye contact with Michael throughout the pleasantries, hoping he at least answered appropriately.

“Would you mind if I borrowed James for a moment?” Michael asked.

James felt the blood drain from his face. He silently begged her to refuse, to come up with some non-existent excuse about them being in a hurry. Of course, she simply smiled and said, “Sure.”

Was James the only one who noticed Michael’s wolfish smile? After a quick glance at her face, he knew he was. Unable to do anything else, without looking suspicious, he followed Michael. They walked outside, around the side of the building where trees shaded them and blocked them from casual observers.

“You planned this,” James accused.

Michael raised a nonchalant eyebrow. James closed his eyes, allowing a moment to compose himself. He knew how ridiculous his accusation sounded because unless she’d called and invited Michael, then he had no way of knowing. When he felt Michael’s hands settle on his hips as if they belonged there, he realized he’d allowed himself to be distracted into a compromising situation. One with which he was far too comfortable. Michael’s breath was warm against his ear, but the only contact was the weight of Michael’s hands on his hips.

“I’d never let you out of my reach,” Michael purred, highlighting his statement by moving his hands around to grab James ass.

“And let you out of my sight? Never.” Michael licked the shell of James’ ear. “I wouldn’t allow you to be ravished by someone who just happened to be around the corner.”

“You’re hardly capable of it.”

Michael’s laughter was dark, sensual, dangerous, as he pulled back to look James in the eye.

“Would you like to find out?”

“You won’t.”

The words were out before he could employ any common sense. He’d been playing this game with Michael long enough to know he’d take the challenge seriously. Of course, what bothered James the most was his excitement at the prospect of Michael doing exactly what James challenged him to do. He knew better, he had her and she was amazing, but Michael always pushed him in all the wrong ways. And God help him, he loved to push back. He was screwed, probably literally and figuratively. His dick twitched.

“You’d enjoy that, wouldn’t you, James?” Michael began, advancing and forcing James backwards.

James swallowed the sound over-loud in his ears. He felt his heart hammering in his chest. When his back collided with the brick building behind him, his eyes darted around nervously. He wasn’t afraid of Michael per se, but he was currently walking a thin line. They both knew about the line, and once crossed they’d never be able to go back.

Then Michael’s hands curled around his hips proprietarily, and James didn’t care about the line, the consequences, her. Michael’s grip was brutal, his fingers dug painfully into James’ hips. His mouth opened in a silent moan as his head fell back against the brick wall, silently thankful for its solid presence behind him.

James’ entire body shuddered when Michael licked a strip from his collarbone to the hallow behind his ear. Michael bit his earlobe painfully. James’ knees were rather more gelatinous than he would like, safety first.

“You’d like me to ravish you mindlessly against the wall. To make you feel the rough brick through the thin fabric of your t-shirt, to feel the brick under your fingers as I tear you apart from the inside, my dick thrusting in and out of your body, tight and ready for me.”

Michael spun James around, forcing him to feel the brick, and it was exactly and nothing like Michael’s fevered words. They were cool against his flushed skin, the jagged edges biting into his face. Behind him, Michael molded his body to James’. When Michael ground down against him, James’ moan wasn’t silent. In fact, he was positive the sound echoed around them, even traveled all the way back to her, and at any moment she’d come around the corner and catch them.

“That would make it simple for you, wouldn’t it, James. Your chance to make me the villain, give you an easy out with her. Then you would be able to have a clear conscience when you explain the obvious markings on your skin. Marks she didn’t leave. Does she do that, James? Does she use her body to make you hers?”

James could do nothing more than whimper, Michael’s wicked words sending lightning coursing through his trembling body. The gentle kisses Michael placed against James’ neck were in stark contrast to the punishing grip he had on his hips. It made James feel possessed and adored at the same time, the heady knowledge made his head swim.

“Shall I show you, James?”

His tone changed; it was darker, more predatory. James stiffened.

“I think I will,” Michael said to himself.

His voice sounded distant, James too far gone to care about anything beyond his aching hard-on. Michael’s words simply stoking the fire raging within him, consuming him.

Michael’s lips found purchase between James’ neck and collarbone. At the first teasing swipe of his tongue across his flesh, James whimpered and writhed helplessly. Soon, Michael’s teasing nips turned into possessive bites, his lips sucking a mark into James’ skin. It thrilled him to know the affect he had on Michael. To know he caused Michael to fracture. To know he’d made Michael suffer along with him.

“Mine.”

The word ghosted across his skin so softly he almost missed it. He wasn’t sure Michael intended for him to hear, but he did and when Michael squeezed his hips and ground down on him one last time, James felt himself teetering too close to the edge. He pushed himself away from the wall, the sudden movement throwing Michael’s balance long enough for James to reverse their positions. He allowed himself a moment to enjoy the shocked look on Michael’s face before he ran his arms up Michael’s sides, forcing his arms above his head.

“Think it’s that easy, Michael?” James asked, voice ragged.

He moved his hand down, cupping Michael’s jean-covered dick. He squeezed, enjoying the way the veins on Michael’s neck stood out when Michael clenched his jaw. James darted forward and nibbled the length of the prominent vein, feeling Michael tremble slightly beneath him.

“How does it feel, Michael? Hm? Knowing you can’t have me?”

James continued to work his hand over Michael’s dick.

“Do you feel that, Michael?” James asked, giving Michael’s dick a quick squeeze.

Michael moaned in response; James smirked. He slunk down Michael’s body, trailing his hands down Michael’s thighs, until he was on his knees. He looked up at Michael, eyes full of challenge.

“You know what that is, right?”

James mouthed wetly at Michael’s bulge. He pulled away with a sloppy smacking of his lips.

“That’s what I do to you. Even knowing you can’t have me, I do this to you.”

He moved his mouth back to Michael’s dick. One hand held Michael’s hip, pushing him against the wall, the other trailed down palming Michael’s balls. He sucked at Michael’s head, and when Michael’s hands fisted in his hair, he knew he’d evened things out again. He’d shown Michael the truth of their situation, reminded him they were both in this thing, they were both destructive forces. He tore his mouth away and stood to his feet.

He appreciated the way Michael looked, eyes blown, pupils wide, dark, skin flushed, mouth slightly open, it was perfect.

“I almost pity you, Michael,” James began, voice mocking, “Finally knowing what you want, but knowing you can’t have it. Can’t have me. Knowing you’re too late.”

James walked away from Michael, back to her, and ignored how heavy each step felt.

Then I Set Fire to Our Bed

Michael tripped over a shoe he knew he hadn’t left on the floor. For the thousandth time, he resolved to remember to leave a light on in the living room. He picked his way carefully to the end table, almost expecting to see James slouched on the couch. What he did find was a second shoe. He picked it up, and glanced around his living room. When he noticed the collared shirt near the hallway, he knew; the shoe in his hand wasn’t in fact his.

He followed the trail of clothing to his bedroom, his dick hardening in anticipation. Unease trailed up his spine, but he ignored it. Knowing he’d regret it later, he decided to simply go with whatever happened next. Their tango had come to a point where something had to break, and if they broke in the process, well, they saw it coming.

“James,” Michael greeted before he fully entered his room.

The sight on his bed froze the rest of his words in his throat. Wearing nothing but the tie, James sat in the middle of his bed, legs spread, and his hand gently stroked his semi-erect dick. Both of the bedside lamps were on low, illuminating his skin, casting playful shadows along the contours of his body. Michael swallowed hard. Millions of warnings sounded off in his mind. He knew he should throw James’ clothing at him, demand he get dressed and leave, but instead he moved further into the room. James watched his movements, and Michael felt a thrill go through him.

“Does she know you’re here, James?”

James’ smile seemed wrong, but before Michael could analyze it further, he was answering.

“Probably. Doubt she cares though.”

Michael raised an eyebrow.

James’ eyes narrowed, and Michael felt his stomach drop.

“She left me.”

Michael nodded.

James refused to look away; Michael could tell from the set of his jaw that he’d be forced to look away first. Michael’s mouth watered at the sight of James spread out on his bed. He wondered if this was how Odysseus felt tied to the mast of his ship, and regretted not have a crew to tie him more securely to his sanity. As he pulled his shirt over his head, he knew he was diving head first into madness. James’ gaze left a hot trail on his skin as he looked his fill. Michael smirked; let him look.

Michael moved to the side of the bed and sat down to take off his shoes and socks. He ignored James, but he felt his eyes on his back.

“Do you know what you’re doing, James?” Michael asked, hoping it sounded as casual as he intended. He was unsure of what answer he wanted.

He felt the bed shift, then James’ body was hot and hard against his back. He hissed breath through his teeth. Warm lips latched onto his neck, gently sucking the skin there. James’ hand snaked over his shoulders, paused briefly to tease Michael’s nipples, before moving to his waistband. James’ fingers skimmed the skin right below the waistband, his fingers brushing the dark path of hair leading from Michael’s bellybutton to his groin. He tossed his head back, resting it against James’ shoulder, James’ lips still licking and sucking along his neck and collarbone. When he felt the hardness of James’ dick along his back, the last vestiges of his control disappeared.

“I’m just giving us both what we want,” James whispered, “What we’ve wanted since filming. What we’ve been careening towards since the scene we filmed in bed, when we were moments, heartbeats away from this very position.”

With a growl, Michael pulled out of James’ embrace, turned, and pinned James’ smaller body beneath his. Their lips crashed together, more teeth than anything; they each brutally tried to gain the other’s submission. Michael ground down; knowing the material of his pants would rub almost painfully against James’ hardening dick. When James whimpered, his hands scrambling over Michael’s ass, he smirked, knowing he’d been right. He continued to thrust his tongue in and out of James’ mouth, he knew it was sloppy and wet and messy, but he couldn’t stop, couldn’t curb the impulse to claim, to bruise, to conquer. He wanted nothing more than for James to be a shattered, blissed out mess beneath him; Michael was determined to get what he wanted this once. He wasn’t going to let this opportunity slip through his fingers.

He tore away from James, both panting, flushed. Michael moved from the bed, standing at its edge, looking down at James, who’d raised himself up on his elbows, eyes dark, eyes half-lidded. Keeping his eyes locked on James, noting the way he bit is lower lip in a way porn stars dream of, Michael reached out and wrapped the tie around his hand, remembering the feel of it, loving how it centered him, reminded him - James was his, at least right now. He tugged on the tie, pulling James from the bed. Instead of landing in an uncoordinated heap like he’d expected, James slid smoothly to his knees, a smirk playing on his lips.

“I told you, Michael,” James began as he reached for the button on Michael’s jeans, “I’m giving us what we both want.”

James took his time lowering the zipper and even longer to pull Michael’s jeans and underwear down, over his hips, down to his ankles. Michael fisted his free hand in James’ hair, holding him still while he kicked them the rest of the way off. He felt James try to shake out of the grip; Michael squeezed his fist tighter. James’ eyes flashed dangerously. James might be giving them what they both wanted, but it would be on Michael’s terms.

“Then I suggest you get on with it,” Michael growled.

He released his grip on James’ hair only to use his grip on the tie to pull James’ face to his dick. James looked up at him, and the sight was incredible. His eyes were full of that self-righteous anger Michael intended to fuck out of him in a bit, his lips were red, swollen from their aggressive kisses. Hesitation flitted through James eyes, and for that moment Michael couldn’t breathe. He would have been able to stop, but once James’ lips circled the tip of his dick, any chance James had of getting out of this vanished. He made some guttural noise when James took more of him into his mouth. Micahel forced himself to keep his eyes open, he wanted to watch James suck him dry. He enjoyed the way James kept his locked on his, clearly not letting their battle die in the throes of passion.

James kept his hands on his thighs, his mouth sliding smoothly on Michael’s dick. His gaze never wavered, even when Michael’s dick fell from his lips with a wet pop, James kept looking directly at Michael, daring him to forget who was on his knees for him. As if he could. As if he wanted to, this was something he’d been imagining for longer than he cared to remember, long before the scene. James licked down his length, his tongue moving to lick broad sweeps across his balls before sucking one and then the other into his mouth.

Michael used the control he had with the tie to pull James’ mouth back to his dick. He fucked into James’ mouth, using the tie to keep his rhythm steady. James’ eyes began to water, but Michael kept up his brutal pace, wanting to punish James. This time, he was punishing him for coming to him when she left, knowing he’d be weak enough to simply accept him into his bed without a second thought. Knowing enough to exploit his weakness. Michael didn’t like having his weakness so easily manipulated. James was an expert. And each time he thrust his dick down James’ throat, he was reminding him that power shifted quickly; the simple fact that James didn’t pull away meant he knew it, and accepted it. For now, at least, James was the one on his knees.

Before he lost it from James mouth alone, Michael pushed James away. Quickly, James scrambled to his feet, and before Michael could react, James shoved him face first into the wall.

“What’s the matter, Michael? Hm? Can’t hold it back? Afraid I’ll make you lose it too soon?”

Somehow, James managed to wiggled one of his hands between Michael’s ass cheeks, his dry finger brushing against his dry hole. The sensation was like sandpaper, and Michael couldn’t repress the shiver that shot up his spine.

“How does it feel, knowing I’ve turned you into this? Moments away from shattering in my arms?”

Michael let out a strangled cry when James shoved his finger into his hole. He knew it wasn’t all the way in, but dry and without warning it was more pain than pleasure. He knew James was getting his back, taking revenge for being on his knees for Michael.

“He ever make you feel this need?”

James twisted his finger, wringing another broken cry from Michael.

Having enough, Michael pushed back, knocking James’ finger loose, setting James’ balance off. Before he could tumble backwards onto the bed, Michael snatched the tie, his grip on it the only think keeping James from falling. He read the surprise, the anger, the arousal, fighting each other in his eyes.

Michael hauled James back upright, spun him around to face the wall, slamming him none too gently against the surface in the process, hand still fisted tightly around the tie, forcing James’ head to arch backwards, exposing the long column of his throat.

“True, James. You’ve made me painfully hard, but when I shatter, and I will, no point in lying about that, it’ll be when I’m buried balls deep in your ass. That will only happen when you’re a whimpering mass of need beneath me, begging me to fuck you. You’ll be on your knees when I slam into you over and over. That’s what you want, isn’t it? That’s why you came here. I can give you something she never could. Something you’ll always crave.”

James craned his neck to look Michael in the eye. An unreadable expression on his face.

“Then get on with it already, Michael.”

Michael smashed his lips to James’, licking his way into his mouth, swallowing his whimpers. He pulled them away from the wall, pushed James back until his knees hit the edge of the bed. He let go of James long enough for him to scramble up onto the bed. Michael quickly followed. He reached across to the bedside table and pulled his bottle of lube and a condom from the top drawer. He heard James hiss in anticipation and smirked. Destructive as it was, they both wanted it. The point of no return far out of their reach.

James placed himself on all fours in the middle of the bed, wiggling his ass a little. Michael smoothed a hand over the firm globe of flesh, loving the feel of it under his fingers. A hand on each cheek, he spread James wide, taking a moment to admire his pink, puckered hole. He leaned forward and licked, tongue flat, a long strip from his balls to the edge of his crack. James’ back bowed. Michael repeated the action. He spread James open further, his tongue darting in to lick around his hole, alternating it with broad sweeps. James made the most incredible breathy little sounds. When he pushed his tongue into James’ hole, his whole body shook. Michael continued to fuck James with his tongue, hands gripping James’ ass tight, keeping him spread open. He felt pre-come drip from his dick, but intended to keep his promise. James would beg for him first.

He popped the cap on the lube, coating one of his fingers before thrusting it all the way into James.

“Michael,” James cried his name brokenly, body pushing back against Michael’s finger.

Michael thrust his finger in and out, never quite touching James’ prostrate. He added a second finger, enjoying the sheen of sweat coating James’ body. He knew James wanted it, knew he was close, but he was stubbornly not asking for it. Doing just to show Michael he wouldn’t beg. While Michael understood better than he’d like, even respected it a bit, he desperately wanted to fuck James senseless. He added a third finger, thrusting hard and fast into James.

When Michael removed his fingers entirely, James whimpered and hung his head. He draped himself over James’ body, taking the tie in his hand again.

“Just beg, James. Tell me how much you want me, and I’ll make you feel so good. All you have to do is ask.”

He felt James’ body vibrating with the effort of staving off his arousal. James turned his face, plundering Michael’s mouth with his tongue. Michael allowed James to control the kiss, to bite at his lips. No one could say he wasn’t reasonable.

“I hate you,” James whispered, their lips brushing with each word.

“I know,” Michael responded. Somewhere distant the truth of that knowledge hurt, but he’d have plenty of time to think about that later.

“Fuck me, Michael. Damn it, fuck me.”

Michael closed his eyes. He felt the desperate brokenness in that whispered command everywhere. He placed a gentle kiss to that spot right below James’ ear before pulling away, keeping the tie in his hand as he pulled away. He almost missed seeing the tear sliding down James’ face. Almost.

With fumbling hands, Michael quickly slid on the condom and slathered it with lube. He knew neither one of them would last long. They’d been on this precipice for far too long for it to last. He buried himself inside James in one smooth motion. He stayed still for a moment, giving James, and himself, a minute to adjust. James was tighter than he’d expected and so hot, it was incredible. When James began to shift restlessly, Michael took his cue and began to thrust into James. He kept one hand on James’ hip, with the other he wrapped the tie around his hand, taking some of the slack out of the tie. He saw the material bite slightly into James’ skin, watched the way it forced him to keep his back arched, his neck back, it was perfect.

As predicted, it didn’t take long before Michael felt his balls tighten, he knew he was close. He used the tie to pull James back until his back was flush against Michael’s chest. He moved his hand from James’ hip to wrap tightly around his dick. He pumped James’ dick brutally, his thumb swiping over the tip, using the pre-come as a lubricant as he continued to fist James’ dick. He changed the cant of his hips; hitting James’ prostrate and James came apart in his arms. He pumped James until the last of his come dripped from the tip. Hand covered with James’ come, he shoved his face down into the mattress and thrust erratically into James’ over sensitized body, chasing his own release. After a couple of deep thrusts, he felt himself filling James.

He pulled from James slowly. By the time he’d taken care of the condom, and retrieved a washcloth from the bathroom, James had curled onto his side on the bed. Michael reached out, and James flinched away from his touch. It stung, but it was to be expected. He tried again, and James allowed him to roll him onto his back. Gently, Michael wiped James clean and tossed the washcloth towards the bathroom. He turned out the lights and crawled into bed. He wanted to pull James into his arms, to kiss him softly, to whisper nonsense in his ear. When James rolled away from him, Michael sighed and rolled away, too. Back to back, they fell asleep.

Michael awoke the next morning, the space next to him still warm. For a moment, hope flared in his chest. Then he heard the front door shut. He squeezed the pillow to his face. After he’d composed himself a bit, he rolled over and opened his eyes. The tie lay next to him. Where James should be. Michael wrapped the material around his hand, cradled his hand to his chest and closed his eyes. They’d had exactly what they wanted, it caused them everything, it caused them nothing and they’d never have it again. Even if they didn’t get what they wanted, they both got exactly what the deserved.

~FIN~