Writer's Block: Pecking Order
Last name basis I'm the youngest of three. There's Jess, oldest, loudest, boldest. Next there's Rick, and to be honest he's a bit of a bastard. And then there's me. Dad left when I was about four, never quite knew why until I was about seventeen when I wasn't really the baby any more. So I've got a half sister, Nicole, dont see her much. Which I suppose is fitting, considering none of us knew she existed until she was thirteen. Mother to mother hostility doesn't help I suppose. She's nice enough, but there'll never be brother sister love between us, i dont think. Certainly not the way it is between me and Jess.
Jess is brilliant, only way I can ever describe her. Rick was always so much more independant than me, and Jess so much more so than him, so Jess was always the one pulling me along, getting me involved. When I wasn't under Mum's wing it was Jess'. Girls boy, I suppose. The Baby. Wouldn't have been quite like that if Nicole was an actual part of our family. I feel bad saying it, considering we're blood, but there's still that divide I can't conquer around her. She's the partial reason my parents split - it's hard, sometimes. But I do wish i could see her more. I like her, but she's just... not my sister like she should be.
But it's fairly obvious how being the youngest affected me, I'm a weakling who can do pretty much naught for himself. Always been doted on, always helped rather than told to go at it myself - like the others had to. Jess just did it herself without anyone saying a word. Rick had to be forced into anything and I got to breeze through with the ease of being last. If I wasn't the baby of the family they wouldn't have humoured me for so long after I was attacked. They'd have been more like Rick, I think, and told me to stop being a bastard and get up. Rick has always been the harder one; he was old enough to know what was happening when Dad left, but not old enough to be told everything or get a say the way Jess was. He's the typical middle child, I suppose. I love him, he's my brother - but we're very different people and we dont really get along. He wouldn't be the one coming round next week, that's for sure.
Jess is brilliant, only way I can ever describe her. Rick was always so much more independant than me, and Jess so much more so than him, so Jess was always the one pulling me along, getting me involved. When I wasn't under Mum's wing it was Jess'. Girls boy, I suppose. The Baby. Wouldn't have been quite like that if Nicole was an actual part of our family. I feel bad saying it, considering we're blood, but there's still that divide I can't conquer around her. She's the partial reason my parents split - it's hard, sometimes. But I do wish i could see her more. I like her, but she's just... not my sister like she should be.
But it's fairly obvious how being the youngest affected me, I'm a weakling who can do pretty much naught for himself. Always been doted on, always helped rather than told to go at it myself - like the others had to. Jess just did it herself without anyone saying a word. Rick had to be forced into anything and I got to breeze through with the ease of being last. If I wasn't the baby of the family they wouldn't have humoured me for so long after I was attacked. They'd have been more like Rick, I think, and told me to stop being a bastard and get up. Rick has always been the harder one; he was old enough to know what was happening when Dad left, but not old enough to be told everything or get a say the way Jess was. He's the typical middle child, I suppose. I love him, he's my brother - but we're very different people and we dont really get along. He wouldn't be the one coming round next week, that's for sure.