Setting a course for disaster (Bernard, Titans ensemble, PG-13, Teen Titans/Robin)

[1_900_mimicry]

Title: Setting a course for disaster
Author: Mimic
Characters/Pairings: Ensemble. Tim/Kon, Tim/Bernard, and various others hinted.
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I don't play for keeps. DC owns them.
Notes: Crack! Spawned in chat, with Pixie wanting Bernard to meet the Titans. Lots of crack.
Feedback: Heck yeah!
Word Count: 1600

Comments

[naughty__pixie]

The glare he gets, well, he isn't actually sure if Kon has developed heat vision or not, but it seems safe to lean towards 'yes'.

He sighs, and pulls off his sunglasses. "I wouldn't mind sleeping with him," he says seriously.

Kon, well. Twitches.

BAHAHAHAHAHAH Bernard, the delicate little sledgehammer.

"Not through lack of trying. I'm sure you can relate."

..the *merciless* and *cruel* little sledgehammer.

"Okay, that's too good. I'm getting Raven."

oh gods oh gods! Raven as well! *DIESSSS*

"Huh. Do they mind?"
He smirks. "They don't know."
Kid Flash's eyes go wide behind the mask. Bernard continues to smirk.
"That's creepy."
He probably shouldn't feel proud.

HAHAHAHAH !! it must be a Gothamite thing. They all love to freak superpowered hero's out. Look at what Matches regularly does to Clark after all. *grins* (yes, *that* fic)

"Bart!"

"They both want you. Like Kon does this *twitch* thing --"

Poor Robin. 3 very hot males want into his hot bod, whatever *shall* he do? (NO BRUCIE MOMENTS!!! NO! JUST NO!)

Bernard can feel it. He smirks. "Tell me?" he questions.
Kon shifts back to confusion, he can practically see the anger clouding. "He *never* told me, honey."
He looks Superboy up and down again. Kon -- freezes. Hm. Maybe it's a superhero thing. He'll have to look into it.
He smiles. "You *really* need to fix that costume, Kon."
Kon's expression is somewhere between 'woah' and 'what the fuck'.
Again, he shouldn't feel proud.

LOL!!! YUP! definitely a Gothamite thing!! and please, after this? the foursome-of-YESohgodsYES *has* to happen.

"You're like *Tim*!"

"He is *not*."

1)the eyebrow

check

2)the cucumber cool

check

3)the adaptability to fucked up situations

check

4) the stalker tendencies

*raises eyebrown* check

5)the empty house

check

6)the uncaring parents

check

7)the secret keeping fetish

check

8)the love(and friendship) of all hot sleek spandex clad hot superhero males

check

9)the iron balls

check

10)the ability to *crawl* under your skin with little or no effort

check

11) the ability to get any answer he wants regardless of its secret level status

soooo check

i *could* keep going but...

you were saying?

Bernard stares out at the San Francisco Bay. The sun is setting, and the descriptor he's looking for is 'romantic'. It's a shame his current company cuts back on the usage rather heavily.

*Chokes on laughter*
oh bless his gay little soul.

"You know," he muses aloud, purposefully enunciating. "I'm here for the entire weekend."

Tim freezes.

SEQUEL!!!!!!!

"I don't suppose you know how to play Truth or Dare?" he asks, nodding sadly at Tim's imitation of a statue. "Yes, I'm sure growing up in a cave has it's disadvantages."

He stares at Tim's clenched jaw for a second.

"It's nothing to be *ashamed* of."

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHH!!! yes oooohhhh yess we are *so* having a sequel for this. just as soon as you are awake enough *evil grin*

and mannnnn he totally knows about Bruce as well doesn't he? and i can totally see the lecture from Bats:
"you know, when your father encouraged you to make friends with regular children, I do not believe he meant children like *you*, exactly."
Dick is SO gonna freak. but you know my thoughts on this already. *grins*

I love you so so much, you know that right?

of course you do.

[1_900_mimicry]

I hate when you give me lists.

I *like* lists.

Stop that.

"you know, when your father encouraged you to make friends with regular children, I do not believe he meant children like *you*, exactly."

*choke* Bwahahaha.

I love you too. Obviously.

[naughty__pixie]

I hate when you give me lists.

I *like* lists.

I *know*.

Stop that.

Let me think about that....*no*. *grins*

I love you too. Obviously.

Really? *How* much do you love me? *grins with teeth*