A+ for inferiorism!!
There are very few people in this world so far that i have met that truly make me feel inferior. Not inferior in a bad way, but in the sense that they are just SO smart and informed on so many different level and areas, that i know no matter how hard i try at my present state- i cant match. Today was one of those days where i just felt so incapable and so uneducated in one specific area, that it makes me really want to drastically change that. The manly man i talked about earlier from in the coffee shop at school, also known as "hairy man" (haha its an inside thing), whose real name is actually Chris (whats with ALL the chris'???!!! sheesh) just blows me away. i mean literally. i sat there with my mouth gapping, trying to soak up everything he was saying..without looking too baffled...and it just was an awful experience for me. its not that he holds new and exciting knowlegde, but he just remembers absolutely everything. i totally caught him off gaurd and asked him to explain something to me, and he fully went back like 1500 years ago and laid all the groundwork and foundation of it for me so i could get the entire picture. and im talking like 45 minutes worth of just spewing out facts. something that he didnt even go to school for!!! i LOVE people like that. people who just surprise you with their overflowing knowledge...and you know what? yes it was a slap in the face for me to shape up and fully make the most of my education and resources available to me at my school, and it also challenged a few of my specific religious beliefs (which is just eating me up inside right now and im basically itching to go to the library to sort it all out)....but he never made me feel stupid. i mean I made myself feel stupid, because i know im capable of knowing so much more about this, but he was more encouraging than anything. and excited that i was excited to learn about it. ive learned that i really cant base my beliefs on what ive been brought up with, or what other smart people believe, or even what my pastor believes...i need to dive into a huge pile of theology and figure it out ON ME OWN!!! i dont see how anyone can be secure and confident in their beliefs without really diving into religious history, and forming their own conclusions...not just accepting what theyve been told......