*where and when*would i kill her*
everything really really sucks....
i cant talk to anyone about how i feel about who im feeling it for right now because anything i would say would sound really stupid and shitty. i have these feelings that i cant ever express because if i do ill destroy things with everyone.
ive realized that i cant rely on my friends. when it somes to guys, everytime i get close to someone i really like, one of my "friends" fuck it up. lets consider them...
dave - well, he was my friend at the time, and he ruined it.
jon - caity fucking goes out of her way to hook me and him up, giving me the most amazing moth of my entire life and then tells him im "prude" and screws everything up because now he thinks im lieing to him and that i dont really want him to do stuff with me, so he gets angry and we decide to be "just friends" which is the hardest thing ill have to do ever. hes the best thing that ever happened to me and i have to pretend like he doesnt matter that much.
mike - i got him for one night before a "friend" emotionally fucked me over and decided not to hang out with chris so i could see mike again. so now things between us are too weird to just go back to what we did that night.
brian s - i hooked up with him and kate, being the oblivious ass that she is, hooked up with him later cause she "didnt know i hooked up with him before". so i put my feelings for him aside even thou he called me all the time to sing songs and play guitar for me over the phone and tel me how he liked me more than her and how he wanted me to be with him. i told him i didnt know and kate just kept hooking up with him without even careing how i felt about it.
pete - kelly is going to prom with him, which makes everything 10 times more confusing for me. i dnt know if he likes me or what, but her going to prom with him isnt helping much. i dont know if he likes her, or if theyre just friends, or if one has feelings for the other, or if either care about me.
thing just really really suck right now...i dont think ill ever find someone for me, someone who my "friends" cant fuck up. i hate this, its not fair. all of the good things that happen to me get ripped away and all of the boys that are even remotely interested in me are turned off by something one of the assholes i call friends did. why cant i find someone whos feelings wont be terminated the minute of of the assinine people i know dribble out some retarded babble to make me look bad.why does NOONE in this world ever want me to be happy?? its getting to the point where ill take anyone whos thrown at me. i just want somene who can make me happy in a different way then my friends can.
i cant talk to anyone about how i feel about who im feeling it for right now because anything i would say would sound really stupid and shitty. i have these feelings that i cant ever express because if i do ill destroy things with everyone.
ive realized that i cant rely on my friends. when it somes to guys, everytime i get close to someone i really like, one of my "friends" fuck it up. lets consider them...
dave - well, he was my friend at the time, and he ruined it.
jon - caity fucking goes out of her way to hook me and him up, giving me the most amazing moth of my entire life and then tells him im "prude" and screws everything up because now he thinks im lieing to him and that i dont really want him to do stuff with me, so he gets angry and we decide to be "just friends" which is the hardest thing ill have to do ever. hes the best thing that ever happened to me and i have to pretend like he doesnt matter that much.
mike - i got him for one night before a "friend" emotionally fucked me over and decided not to hang out with chris so i could see mike again. so now things between us are too weird to just go back to what we did that night.
brian s - i hooked up with him and kate, being the oblivious ass that she is, hooked up with him later cause she "didnt know i hooked up with him before". so i put my feelings for him aside even thou he called me all the time to sing songs and play guitar for me over the phone and tel me how he liked me more than her and how he wanted me to be with him. i told him i didnt know and kate just kept hooking up with him without even careing how i felt about it.
pete - kelly is going to prom with him, which makes everything 10 times more confusing for me. i dnt know if he likes me or what, but her going to prom with him isnt helping much. i dont know if he likes her, or if theyre just friends, or if one has feelings for the other, or if either care about me.
thing just really really suck right now...i dont think ill ever find someone for me, someone who my "friends" cant fuck up. i hate this, its not fair. all of the good things that happen to me get ripped away and all of the boys that are even remotely interested in me are turned off by something one of the assholes i call friends did. why cant i find someone whos feelings wont be terminated the minute of of the assinine people i know dribble out some retarded babble to make me look bad.why does NOONE in this world ever want me to be happy?? its getting to the point where ill take anyone whos thrown at me. i just want somene who can make me happy in a different way then my friends can.