sleep paralysis?
Oh yeah... I wanted to write this down because it was pretty neat and I don't want to forget it...
I had the most fucked up dream-wake state experience yesterday morning. Something in the dream I was having made me want to wake up. I don’t remember what it was, though that’s not really important. Anyway, I tried the usual way of waking myself up during a bad dream by forcibly opening my eyes. I usually find it pretty difficult but almost always can after a couple attempts. This time, however, while I was able to successfully open my eyes numerous times I was unable to keep my eyelids open, as though there were heavy weights attached to them. It felt as though I kept being pulled back to the dream state. That wasn’t the fucked up part though. As the numerous attempts to wake by opening my eyes failed I simultaneously tried lifting my arms, and it indeed felt as though I had lifted them each time but I could see with my open eyes that my arms were still lying on the bed in the same position. This happened many times before I tried sitting up. Again, it felt as though I had sat up each time, but again I could see that I was still lying in the original position. Each time I “sat up” as well, it felt as though I was attached to some huge elastic band that pulled me back to the bed. Finally, starting to panic I tried sitting up and crawling towards the foot of the bed, grasping at the bed sheets, but again, each time I felt as though I were being pulled back to my sleeping position, and each time I opened my eyes my body was still in the same position. Finally I started repeatedly opening and clenching my fingers, making fists. For some reason this seemed to do the trick. My eyes could see the fists repeatedly being made and then I knew I was awake. One particularly interesting part during all of this was that during one of the times my eyes were open I looked to my left and saw the book I had been reading before I fell asleep right next to me. I tried reading a few lines hoping that would somehow help me wake but to no avail. What a weird episode of sleep paralysis, if that’s what it was. Though sleep paralysis in itself is just plain weird.
I had the most fucked up dream-wake state experience yesterday morning. Something in the dream I was having made me want to wake up. I don’t remember what it was, though that’s not really important. Anyway, I tried the usual way of waking myself up during a bad dream by forcibly opening my eyes. I usually find it pretty difficult but almost always can after a couple attempts. This time, however, while I was able to successfully open my eyes numerous times I was unable to keep my eyelids open, as though there were heavy weights attached to them. It felt as though I kept being pulled back to the dream state. That wasn’t the fucked up part though. As the numerous attempts to wake by opening my eyes failed I simultaneously tried lifting my arms, and it indeed felt as though I had lifted them each time but I could see with my open eyes that my arms were still lying on the bed in the same position. This happened many times before I tried sitting up. Again, it felt as though I had sat up each time, but again I could see that I was still lying in the original position. Each time I “sat up” as well, it felt as though I was attached to some huge elastic band that pulled me back to the bed. Finally, starting to panic I tried sitting up and crawling towards the foot of the bed, grasping at the bed sheets, but again, each time I felt as though I were being pulled back to my sleeping position, and each time I opened my eyes my body was still in the same position. Finally I started repeatedly opening and clenching my fingers, making fists. For some reason this seemed to do the trick. My eyes could see the fists repeatedly being made and then I knew I was awake. One particularly interesting part during all of this was that during one of the times my eyes were open I looked to my left and saw the book I had been reading before I fell asleep right next to me. I tried reading a few lines hoping that would somehow help me wake but to no avail. What a weird episode of sleep paralysis, if that’s what it was. Though sleep paralysis in itself is just plain weird.