Sick *cough cough*
I realised yesterday how much family really matters. I mean if i didnt have my mum, my sisters and everyone else ... i wouldnt be who i am (avoid who i dont want to be hehehe) I soaked in the warmth of the bond between mother and daughter, sister-to-sister, mucked around with my neice....things that i dont normally do with even the closest of friends. I know its nerdy but honestly i dont know what i would do without my mum!
I miss Kathy again, i was wondering why i dont hang out with my siblings on dads side as much and i felt like crying about Kathy. It still hurts! I still havent read the letter that i wrote during the preparation for the funeral, i wrote on it that i cant read it until a years time, 4 years later i still cant open it, im too afraid to. Im even afraid to enter dads room...just because i know her box is under the bed....her perfume, her photos, her identity is still in there along with the sterile containers holding her jewellery...a reminder of that night at the hospital *sadly smiles* those finger nails with green polish. Its sad moments like these that make me realise how much i love my family and why i strive to be closer....people you love dont always stay in your life but they will always stay in your heart.....and usually it hurts.
I dont know why but she reminds me of who i love now.
I think i just need time out. Im trying to understand those around me. I love Brum and i dont want him to hurt. I'll do anything so he doesnt hurt.
I miss Kathy again, i was wondering why i dont hang out with my siblings on dads side as much and i felt like crying about Kathy. It still hurts! I still havent read the letter that i wrote during the preparation for the funeral, i wrote on it that i cant read it until a years time, 4 years later i still cant open it, im too afraid to. Im even afraid to enter dads room...just because i know her box is under the bed....her perfume, her photos, her identity is still in there along with the sterile containers holding her jewellery...a reminder of that night at the hospital *sadly smiles* those finger nails with green polish. Its sad moments like these that make me realise how much i love my family and why i strive to be closer....people you love dont always stay in your life but they will always stay in your heart.....and usually it hurts.
I dont know why but she reminds me of who i love now.
I think i just need time out. Im trying to understand those around me. I love Brum and i dont want him to hurt. I'll do anything so he doesnt hurt.