POI fic: Henchman AU #4: Bear with us
TITLE: Henchman AU #4 - Bear with us
AUTHOR: whomii2
DISCLAIMER: do not own
SUMMARY: Harold reveals his pet project
Harold had invited them down to the lab to see what he had been working on. John had his fingers crossed, hoping for ray guns. Fusco was looking around curiously, not having been down to the lower levels before. They entered the main lab where Harold was waiting for them. He was watching a teapot that was warming over a bunsen burner, teacup ready for when the drink was appropriately brewed.
“Watcha got for us Harold?”
Finch stood up and smoothed down his immaculate white lab coat. He then surprised John by giving a piercing whistle. There were scuffling noises from the next room and the clatter of nails as they were joined by Harold's pet project.
“Is that...?”
“A velociraptor” Harold said smugly. “His name is Bear.”
Guess that explains the collar John thought. Bear had a large leather collar with studs around his neck, the tag with his identifying information hanging from the front. The metal tag was in the shape of a skull & crossbones, except the 'skull' was the smiling face of a teddy bear.
The minions and the dinosaur eyed each other warily as Finch's gaze bounced between the two groups excitedly.
“Is it safe?” John asked quietly, keeping still so as not to provoke the beast but not liking the way it was looking at them. It seemed....hungry.
“Certainly!” Finch said. “I familiarized it with your scent so that it would recognize you as part of its 'pack.'”
Lionel had an epiphany “That's where my missing boxers went!”
“You fed our dirty laundry to a dinosaur?” Reese said incredulously.
“Of course not!” Finch said indignantly. “Do you really think there is anything on the planet that would be tempted to eat Lionel's underwear? Those were lost in another experiment”...Finch trailed off in an indecipherable mumble.”...wormhole...”
Further discussion was cut off by Lionel's action. Reassured as to the good intentions of the Velociraptor, he shoved his phone into Reese's hands and strode across the room to throw an arm around the confused beast.
“Take my picture! Take my picture! Lee is gonna love this! I am gonna be the coolest dad ever.”
“DubelmoHchugh wej ghaH Sop. be poq SuyItHa' ghaH.” Harold said to Bear, while John brought up the phone to take a picture. The minion and the dinosaur were both sporting wide toothy grins. Reese suppressed a chuckle as Fusco raised two fingers for bunny ears behind Bear's head for the next shot. This wasn't a lightsaber, but it was still pretty cool.
“majQa'. vavlI' SoHvaD Hem” Finch told Bear when the photoshoot was over.
“What was that Harold?” John asked curiously.
“Some of the training material I reviewed during the process suggested that commands be spoken in a foreign language in order to avoid confusion with normal conversation.”
“I've heard some military dogs are trained to respond to Dutch commands. But that didn't sound like Dutch to me.”
“Noooooo. I don't know Dutch. I decided to use another language I was already familiar with, but that Bear was unlikely to hear spoken during routine day-to-day activities.”
John was confused for a moment before he figured it out. Really, he should have expected this from Harold. But dammit, now he was going to have to learn Klingon!
Klingon quotes
*Please do not eat him. I am sure he would give you indigestion.
**Good job. Daddy's very proud of you
AUTHOR: whomii2
DISCLAIMER: do not own
SUMMARY: Harold reveals his pet project
Harold had invited them down to the lab to see what he had been working on. John had his fingers crossed, hoping for ray guns. Fusco was looking around curiously, not having been down to the lower levels before. They entered the main lab where Harold was waiting for them. He was watching a teapot that was warming over a bunsen burner, teacup ready for when the drink was appropriately brewed.
“Watcha got for us Harold?”
Finch stood up and smoothed down his immaculate white lab coat. He then surprised John by giving a piercing whistle. There were scuffling noises from the next room and the clatter of nails as they were joined by Harold's pet project.
“Is that...?”
“A velociraptor” Harold said smugly. “His name is Bear.”
Guess that explains the collar John thought. Bear had a large leather collar with studs around his neck, the tag with his identifying information hanging from the front. The metal tag was in the shape of a skull & crossbones, except the 'skull' was the smiling face of a teddy bear.
The minions and the dinosaur eyed each other warily as Finch's gaze bounced between the two groups excitedly.
“Is it safe?” John asked quietly, keeping still so as not to provoke the beast but not liking the way it was looking at them. It seemed....hungry.
“Certainly!” Finch said. “I familiarized it with your scent so that it would recognize you as part of its 'pack.'”
Lionel had an epiphany “That's where my missing boxers went!”
“You fed our dirty laundry to a dinosaur?” Reese said incredulously.
“Of course not!” Finch said indignantly. “Do you really think there is anything on the planet that would be tempted to eat Lionel's underwear? Those were lost in another experiment”...Finch trailed off in an indecipherable mumble.”...wormhole...”
Further discussion was cut off by Lionel's action. Reassured as to the good intentions of the Velociraptor, he shoved his phone into Reese's hands and strode across the room to throw an arm around the confused beast.
“Take my picture! Take my picture! Lee is gonna love this! I am gonna be the coolest dad ever.”
“DubelmoHchugh wej ghaH Sop. be poq SuyItHa' ghaH.” Harold said to Bear, while John brought up the phone to take a picture. The minion and the dinosaur were both sporting wide toothy grins. Reese suppressed a chuckle as Fusco raised two fingers for bunny ears behind Bear's head for the next shot. This wasn't a lightsaber, but it was still pretty cool.
“majQa'. vavlI' SoHvaD Hem” Finch told Bear when the photoshoot was over.
“What was that Harold?” John asked curiously.
“Some of the training material I reviewed during the process suggested that commands be spoken in a foreign language in order to avoid confusion with normal conversation.”
“I've heard some military dogs are trained to respond to Dutch commands. But that didn't sound like Dutch to me.”
“Noooooo. I don't know Dutch. I decided to use another language I was already familiar with, but that Bear was unlikely to hear spoken during routine day-to-day activities.”
John was confused for a moment before he figured it out. Really, he should have expected this from Harold. But dammit, now he was going to have to learn Klingon!
Klingon quotes
*Please do not eat him. I am sure he would give you indigestion.
**Good job. Daddy's very proud of you