Mind Games (1/?)

[upupa_epops]

Title: Mind Games
Fandom: The Vampire Diaries
Rating: NC-17
Wordcount: 2500
Characters/Pairings: Damon/Elena; also features Bonnie, Jeremy, Shane, Rebekah and Stefan.
Spoilers: goes AU in 4x13. Some of the lines and events are from the episode, some are not. No Lost spoilers in this chapter, just general references.
Summary: Shane is leading them

Comments

[badboy_fangirl]

I assume you're doing this without a beta, and this line really stood out to me as awkward, so I want to point it out before I start flailing:

“Is it just me, or does this island look really creepy?” asks Jeremy out of the blue, almost making Damon jump on his sit.
Do you mean 'jerk on his seat' like he was startled? Because this just makes no sense to me, and I usually get your metaphorical English quite well :D (Also the next sentence after that is missing the period at the end.)

Okay, on to the flailing:

First of all: POLAR BEARS! This should be the password forever. SO FUNNY, so Damon.

He only hears an arrow, then a hatchet and some screams, and it takes some self-control to not turn around looking for a pillar of black smoke. Run, BooneDamon, run!

And then to finish it up...
If he ever makes it out of here alive, he's never watching TV again.
...with that? LOLOLOL FOREVER. I can't stand it.

they're following the lead of probably the shadiest guy Damon met this month.This is funny particular, because DUH. LOLOLOL. See, this

[upupa_epops]

Thank you, edited! I am the worst, ugh.

I had so much fun with the Lost jokes! You know Damon would. He totally would.

I am awaiting the loud tent sex since we got the bad, weird not-sex out of the way :D

I swear, this was supposed to be actual tent sex! But then I took your advice, stopped overthinking it and let the characters take the lead... and this is what they wanted to do! I swear, I had nothing to do with it.

Thank you for reading and commenting <3333.

[badboy_fangirl]

As for the editing--it now says 'jerk on his sit' and that is still not right. Seat is the word you mean--where he is sitting, that's his seat. Also, the sentence after that still doesn't have a period! ;-)

If Damon watches The Amazing Race, I'm sure he watched LOST, too. It only makes sense!

Also: very excited for part two!

[upupa_epops]

Done now! Thank you for having patience for my lack of brains today.

Damon watched EVERYTHING! No way he hasn't seen Lost.

I already started part two, so if nothing unexpected happens, I hope to have it done at some point next week?

[swirlsofblue]

Oh, I absolutely love this, especially the portrayal of all of Damon's off feelings, and the lost references :).

[upupa_epops]

Thank you! Damon's feelings were the difficult part for me :).

[kesjcv]

I absolutely LOVE this - so hot and sad and vivid! You have such a gift for expression, and setting just the right mood for a piece so that it carries an immense weight in all it's smallest movements and words. I love all your stories, and every day I check to see if you've posted a new update! Would you consider writing the next chapter form Elena's POV? I just always have a hard time gauging her, and it would be really great to see this revelation from her viewpoint, and her view of Damon, in all his insecurity, comforting, recklessness, passion, and out-of-controllness which seems to hit them both a whammy whenever they're together :P

[upupa_epops]

Whoa, thank you so much! I'm so happy to know you were reading my stuff, and even happier to meet you :D.

I'm sorry to disappoint you, but this whole story will be from Damon's POV. I want to keep the story in a quite creepy mood, and to do that, I need Damon's imagination to play tricks on him the way it does in this chapter. If you want to, try to make an experiment and imagine some scenes from here from Elena's POV. It would be a completely different story, Elena would be incredibly focused and single-minded, because stress affects her differently. She wouldn't even notice that the island is so uncanny, her entire attention would be on people and on the cure.

Besides, I write Elena's POV so often I also want to experiment with Damon from time to time :). So, maybe next time?

[kesjcv]

Haha of course :D I pretty much love anything you choose to write so... LOL :P I'm really looking forward to the next instalment of this story! It was lovely to meet you too :) Speak soon! :)

[upupa_epops]

Thank you! I hope to hear from you more often, not just in fic posts, also in general :).

[magisterequitum]

I didn't get to read this till my break now, but SO WORTH IT.

All the little LOST references are wonderful.

And I wish this is the way it would have played out? This seems more realistic. I mean, you and I have talked about how the cure is such a fake.

BUT YES. GOOD.

I want all the more of this. The pain and desperation and longing in the last scene and Elena just broke my heart with what she was trying to do.

[upupa_epops]

I won't lie, there's some wishful thinking on my part here ;). It's funny you'd say that this is realistic when the story is so focused on Damon's paranoid imagination, but I totally get you. This is closer to what we talked about than the actual show turned out to be.

I'm so glad this works for you! Thank you for reading and commenting!

[cyanskye]

Okay, I have gotten an adequate amount of flails out of my system so I can actually comment now.
MARTA. ILU. I love love love this. Everything we wanted from the episode! Lost jokes! Fake sirebond reveal! Even a little bit of sexing (AND THERE WILL BE MORE.)
You did an excellent job portraying Damon's thoughts and emotions.
“Don't go there,” says Damon just to make sure. His knees almost buckle under him when Elena shoots him an angry look and disappears among the trees.
YES okay I can just imagine how in shock Damon is and how his brain is fighting to process the fact that OH HEY ELENA ACTUALLY LOVES YOU DUMBASS when you can tell he's been getting more and more sure that it's just the sirebond messing with him. Oh Damon.

She's unnaturally wise and unbelievably stupid at the same time, and Damon is torn between being glad that she's still strong enough to hold on to her special brand of naivety, and wanting to shake some sense into her, to yell until she lets the mask drop.
Love this. So much.
(It isn't until later that he

[upupa_epops]

Thank you so much! :D And again, sorry this probably isn't what you expected when you were prompting. At some point there will probably be some sex that isn't so miserable, and if not, I owe you another story XD.

You are going to continue to rip my heart out with the next part, aren't you?

Well, everyone thinks I'm incapable of happiness anyway, so why would I disappoint you guys?

[cyanskye]

I will definitely accept one big angsty story and then another separate PWP fic as resolution. ;)