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Axel's Playlist
My characters have been really into music lately, but Axel's definitely shot to the forefront, compiling a huge playlist (plus several videos on youtube) of songs that move him, songs he likes to move to, and good old guilty pleasures. I'm now reposting it here, for reference. He says not to judge him, but I don't think he really cares.
( songs for burnin' ) -
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I am now quite convinced that the root of my depression is - even moreso than my health - my memory. As a child it was always a gift, to be able to remember the scents and sights and touch and taste of places I'd once been. But the memories have stayed clear, even as my quality of life has decreased, and now not only am I confined to a bed in a ( Read more... ) -
Update on... me.
I had a dream last night that I was on a school field trip to King's Island. I wasn't allowed to shave my legs so I couldn't visit the water park, and I wasn't allowed to ride any of the rides because of my back surgery, and I went to use the handicap stall in the public restrooms and when I tried to flush it backed up, spewing liquid shit water ( Read more... ) -
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I drank enough to endanger my health tonight. I don't remember it - there's nothing there, just a big black hole. Apparently I drank enough that I was vomiting into a trashcan Curtis brought me and all over the front of myself. I sent an IM to my friend consisting of little more than random letters. He had to strip the sheets off my bed and wash ( Read more... ) -
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The pain's bad tonight. I took a percocet Sunday night because it was unmanageable and advil wasn't strong enough, and the pain went away. I slept so good that night - better than I have in months, and even though I didn't sleep any longer than usual when I woke up the next morning I had so much more energy and was still in less pain ( Read more... ) -
Something's gone wrong...
...but I don't know what it is. No changes to medication, no overt health problems that weren't already there. But I'm sleeping more, and the hours I'm not sleeping are spent in a dissociative malaise. It would be so easy to chalk this up to depression but, really, it isn't. That's a feeling I'm familiar with ( Read more... ) -
a star-shaped name tag...?
I always hated having to write my name on those name tags they make you wear on first grade field trips - I had an awesome sticker with a place to put a name, and they expected me to use my birth name! It was a chance to let everyone know, "Hi! My name is: _______" with whoever or whatever I wanted to be that day. But that didn't work... they ( Read more... )