I am soooooooooooooooooooo pissed.

The majority of the population of this country/world is full of people who dont have a goddamn clue what they want. We all seek our momentary highs. We sabatoge ourselves when we find what we consider perfection. It is no wonder we are cynical, fearful, jealous, hateful, and just plain cruel to one another.

Hahaha. I just saw this Bacardi commercial. This younger fly is talking to this older fly who was ( Read more... )

I was hit with extreme anxiety today. I'm guessing the trip was such a change of pace that I was distracted. Well, here we are again. Back to the anxiety. It's making me question things all over again. Maybe the idea is to just be, and not to run away. I had been running from everything.Running from my feelings. I'm off meds and I'm foggy. Weird. I ( Read more... )

It was a good week. A desperately needed week. A desperately needed week followed by a loong day of traveling. We left the cabin at 6:30, and made it into Minneapolis at 10:30. We had way too much time, considering the plane was set to leave at 1:40. Sooo, we drove around trying to find the homes where my great grandfather lived. Three homes in the ( Read more... )

Coooooold. Ungodly cold in July. Minnesota weather. I blame it on global warming, but I wont get into that. Thinking that this would be relaxing was a big mistake. BOREDOM. I learned to weld. I did a little boating. Hooked up some office equipment. Uhhh. Slept. We are out in the middle of nowhere where it's rainy, dreary, freezing. Can't swim, too ( Read more... )

I just had a moment of clarity. What one thing do most people try to do to slow down the inevitability of time and and change?

Nothing.

Today, today, today. What can I say about today? Today just like tomorrow, and the next day and the day after are the first days of the rest of our lives. Then again so was yesterday and the day before that and 6 months ago on some random day. Would you think someone who has dabbled in psychology even the slightest bit would understand how we ( Read more... )

Woke up early yesterday morning. It was odd. I got 4 hrs of sleep, but wasn't tired. I read another 100 pages of Angela's Ashes. I cant believe how horrid life was 70 yrs ago for the poor. It was a real eye opener. The physical and psychological abuse that many went through is astounding to me. Then again, many people still live like that today, so ( Read more... )

OK... recent events have been very depressing. So I'm going to vaguely cry about them into this LJ. Let me first state that I am to blame for every single event, which is me feeling sorry for myself, but I currently dont give a shit. Question for the audience. Does anyone know what a phobia is? An fear directed at something specific. May cause a ( Read more... )