I don't want anyone to ever feel uncomfortable, or to feel obligated to commit to something they may not feel the same towards. I was looking to travel per the direction of the flight rules; you book 10 hours before anticipated discharge. It's about last minute and not planning dates out. Because plans change and maybe so does the desire for ( Read more... )

Sometimes I don't realize how badly I am affected by situations until they occur; that I'm completely oblivious, and then, once whatever has surfaced meets the forefront of my mind, I spiral into my own dark self-analysis.

I didn't realize how much I would ache and feel so menial, insignificant, and at fault just hearing from you, how nice it ( Read more... )

I think it helps to realize that in almost every relationship I've been, I have always felt/been the bottom person. The only relationship I felt I was treated as an equal and where we had decent communication, was with Melissa. Even after the worst of times, when we transitioned into friendship.

I have come to recognize that all of my other ( Read more... )

I didn't take what you said to heart. I also didn't think you would hurt him or yourself during any part of that conversation. I'm sorry that you feel last night ended badly. I am not holding anything against what you said in any negative light; I do understand how the internal monologue can be terrifying. I wish you weren't hurting.

I know there ( Read more... )

A big part of me is worried that you are going to be miserable moving back out this way.

I wish there was a way for you to juggle places with ease, to essentially keep you out there and not require the eventual move back east. The way you speak of it there versus the tone you get when talking about here - you can definitely tell Arizona has ( Read more... )

Further complicated thoughts that were purged into notepad instead of a text reply. These words were later spoken while face-to-face, but I don't think I was actually heard, anyway. I don't think you ever stopped to truly listen unless it was the sound of your own voice.

Re: 'no sex' conversation - it's okay to bring up to your partner how you feel ( Read more... )

Not that it would matter, over everything that we went through. Which really? It wasn't much; it just one day... stopped.

In a previous time, not getting a response of hearing from you leads my brain into believing I'm not worth the effort or time; I'm second best and not worth the 5-second update on life events.

When deciding to postpone/cancel ( Read more... )

Today's Important Instructions were (and yes, very specifically this):

First, meet at the dock across from where The Bite Size used to be (we're talking 20 years ago), on Man o War.

There you will meet Francis who shall charter you (in the rain, no less) across to the next harbor at Hope Town.

Then: go to the lighthouse, climb up, climb down, and ( Read more... )

Sometimes I write text messages on a notepad on my phone and never click send. I try to often preface my thoughts with warnings inside my head. I need to process and not react. Proactivity, not reactivity, right? This was a discussion response a few days after it felt as if our relationship was made insignificant, and that my feelings were ( Read more... )

10/8/Over three years now I've known you as online friends; two years that I started paying more attention to who you are, what you like, what you do. A year and a half (and likely then some) that I've had a crush on you from a distance and in silence; and about a year now that we really started picking up with conversations.

I watched your life ( Read more... )