How are you belching resonantly enough to be heard over my music? How?

[sinsense]

There is an intern at my part time job. He has been assigned to the cubicle next to mine. He belches quietly but with great vibrato approximately every fifteen minutes. He slurps his tea (probably the source of the belching! quit aspirating your liquids!). He occasionally breaks into reedy-voiced singing. Also he has a lot of loud telephone

Comments

[slashpile]

Daaaaaaamn.

Throttling, yes. Only good thing about still not working is NO COWORKERS.

Sid. Sid. Sid. All the freakouts & all the Geno, yesssss.

ALSO WEREN'T YOU DOING A SID GLADIATOR STORY. DID IT MORPH. OR IS THIS ANOTHER GLADIATOR STORY?

Also, also. People have been talking about alternate commentaries for the Olympics, and I can't tell you how much I wished you had been able to do this for the fencing. YOU UP FOR RIO?

[sinsense]

This is the eternal balance I have with the part-time employment. Do I take the money, and with it the possibility of buying clothes not previously worn? Or do I take the lack of spine-melting irritation, and have a forlornly empty bank account? Yarghle.

I HAVE ANOTHER SID GLADIATOR STORY but then every time I look at it I'm like oh god I'm writing two Crosby stories and one of them is about him VOLUNTARILY BEING A GLADIATOR oh my god never mind I'm one of those badfic writers oh god. But. Um. I really like gay gladiators. Fight to the death! Then boners to the death! Delicious. It's pretty much my go-to in all situations. It's like the Hunger Games nonstop up in my mindcase.

Oh! Oh, I didn't even think about the possibility of alternate commentaries! Dude, count me in for Rio. I will be your sassy fencing friend. I will totally pressure my mom into doing it, too, since she's, y'know, an international fencer and shit.

[slashpile]

Alternate commentaries: you are totally on the book. And your mom, once she knows ;)

(I've always thought this would be fun, but the CBC's dreadful first attempt at comedy commentary during the Stanley Cup tipped it in a rage-y direction. And Sam Jackson's twitter has basically become the default commentary of The XXX Olympiad. Although, obviously, it's been on tape delay.)

But also: boners to the death. Yessssss. Please, please, please.

ETA: adorkable library link of the day

[rufus]

I am EXTREMELY curious about your kink tumblr. And sympathetic re: coworker.

I . . . think maybe I don't know what kind of stories I want any more? Possibly I'd like an extended daydream about What Ryan Rossy Is Going To Do Next. I'd still totally read a Panic hockey AU. And I always enjoy a good cracktastic epic involving wings or someone being born with / waking up with a tail or bodyswapping or whatever.

nb: what I've been reading is 1D fic, mostly at random. Because Harry Styles is a an ambulatory basket of purring kittens and Louis Tomlinson sometimes goes out and comes home with a duck.

Plus also an SGA mpreg fic that was hands down the WEIRDEST thing I have ever read, in the sense that it involved dudes having kangaroo pouches and reproducing like kangaroos, and the author built a whole world on this premise, which was both amazing AND turned my brain sideways.

[sinsense]

It is whyisithot on Tumblr! Mostly it is less than enlightening, mostly just me rambling about how I find things fascinating. I am working my way up to some of the more gross stuff, so, um. Not safe for life.

I actually really like 1D fic. I have to envision that they are other people, though, because oh god those boys are my STUDENTS. Insofar as they are both my students' age, and also that they have roughly the same amount of life experience and sassiness as my students. (Both not enough and way too much, paradoxically, in both cases.) So I can read about them, but I have to think of them as, like, twenty-seven year olds with miraculous recovery times. Then I see a picture and I'm like, "OH HELL. STUDENTS."

I do like your steez re: cracktastic epics and real-life-timestamps. I do that stuff more often than I like to admit. I mean, I only confessed one of my bedtime stories.

...I really like the sound of that terrifying, terrifying epic. Kangaroo reproduction! It makes sense, in a... nonsensical way.

[rufus]

re: tumblr: so noted. (crooked-heart is me. I'll get out of the kitchen if its too hot.)

combining cracktastic and RL time-stamps for the win, somewhere, and i forget where now, someone asked for a fic on the theme of "the real reason TYV broke up and Ryan stoppled leaving the house was that he sprouted wings." I WOULD READ IT SO HARD. In fact I would read it so hard I wrote two pages of it and then law school started gnawing on a new part of my face, or something, idk, and it never did get finished.

Yeah I can see how the AUGH STUDENTS would be a problem with 1D. Mainly I'm just glad they're all 18 now.

This is the master-tag link kangaroo mpreg. Warning: unfinished, and John Sheppard is really OOC at times. But apparently the same author wrote another one about Loki as a pregnant horse. Impregnated by Thor. Which I have not read. Because I like Loki and Thor and all but apparently pregnant horse Loki is a bridge too far.

[secrethappiness]

Oh do I feel your pain. I have officemates that need to be throttled at least once a day and twice on Fridays. I hate them so much. Things I have had to listen to include borderline racist comments, jokes about some shot called a pink taco, a discussion about how one of them got some last weekend, ignorant comments about life, and overall stupidity. In case you couldn't tell, I'm the only lady in an office full of men.

Basically I am going to have to write that epic about Sidney Crosby falling for Geno because Geno gets his screwed-up relationship to sexuality and then having a Freakout for the Ages because Geno's gonna get TRADED and this is BAD FOR HIS MENTAL GAME. Right? I THINK YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO.

I want a story about how I finish my dissertation on time. OH WAIT, NOT POSSIBLE.

[sinsense]

I keep trying to write that Sidney story and then I am cursed with the dissertation wobbles. It's like writer's block, but with added angst that I really ought to be blocked on my dissertation, not porn. FUCK YOU DISSERTATION WOBBLES. But seriously, Sidney is, like, into weird ad-hoc predicament bondage, like having to balance a cup of water on his head while he's getting a blowjob. Which he doesn't realize until Geno basically is like, "Hold still, yes? Okay." And since he basically has never dated anybody except hockey (they have been going steady since he was TWO), and he's kind of a little pissant who never learned how to function (not his words, but let's be serious), he spends a lot of time going "FUCK. FUCK. HOW DO YOU ASK FOR SHIT LIKE THAT

[secrethappiness]

FUCK ALL DISSERTATIONS IN THE FACE. IN THE FAAAAAAAAAAACE.

I mean, I'm dealing with my stress in a healthy manner where in healthy manner equates to picturing various public humilations visited upon the den of douches (that's my nickname for them).

Anyways, I will subscribe this Sid/Geno newsletter any day. I was thinking about this comment while I was gardening and I think you could write it super hot. So all he has to do is figure out how to ask someone if they'd be into getting him to do one-legged squats while they give him a handjob. It should be simple! HE WON THE CUP. lol Sidney, winning the Cup =/= knowing how to ask someone to put a plug in you and make you do jumping jacks until you're begging for it

[whatifoundthere]

It is not the future but this scorching hot NSFW Oglaf cartoon may begin, JUST SCARCELY BEGIN BUT BEGIN ALL THE SAME, to scratch the itch in your third bullet point.

[sinsense]

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ARE YOU ACTUALLY IN MY SOUL RIGHT NOW. OH MY GOD. ALSO THAT CARTOON IS AMAZING. BUT GLADIATORS. AND DEUS EX MACHINA. HOLY DICKSNOOKER I AM THE HAPPIEST BEAST.

SECRETLY IT IS IN THE ~~~ROMAN FUTURE.

[mrsquizzical]

oh man. that gladiator bedtime story is DELICIOUS!

i tell myself lots of stories, but the main ones to get me to sleep and/or get me off is a good old bb!kitten!spencer giving lady!head or bottoming for the first time. it's not epic. it's just great. /o\

[sinsense]

I love it so much. I made myself cry last night by imagining his interview with THE FUTURE'S version of Barbara Walters, where he's confused and doesn't know that his lover's TRAGIC ENDING was on specfeeds and went viral on ReSpec.com and now he's an emotional-porn hero. And so he's like, "Um. Hi?" and spends a lot of time staring at stuff on the soundstage and asking how the chair works, and then when they start interviewing the lady is goading him on how awful his life is and he's just like, "Well, I was a bad kid, and then I killed a guy, so. Y'know. Technically I'm dead. So." And the lady ends up crying FOR HIM, and he's just sitting there, bewildered, manacled to his chair.

OH GOD THE OBLIVIOUS MANPAIN.

good old bb!kitten!spencer giving lady!head or bottoming for the first time. it's not epic. it's just deliciously fantastic. \o/
Fixed that for you.

[mrsquizzical]

oh wow.

you know, if it's a story you've told yourself a lot, then that's sort of like the first draft is done and when you write it down, you're already editing. :D? :D?

hee. thanks for fixing that, lovely. i appreciate you!<3