Automata: Don't Love Me (Chapter 2)
Title:Automata:Don’t Love Me
Fandom: Arashi, DBSK/JYJ, Super Junior
Pairing: HaeHyuk (Lee Donghae/Lee Hyukjae), Ohmiya (Ohno Satoshi/Ninomiya Kazunari), YunJae (Jung Yunho/ Kim Jaejoong)
Rating: PG-13 to R
Genre: AU, Drama/Angst, Fantasy, Romance
Chapter - Word Count: Chapter 2 - 6 231 words
Summary: How can two people love each other when only one of them is entitled to exist to love and be loved?
Warning: Unbeta-ed
Author’s Notes: More background of Ohno and Nino’s side. *grins* Although a bit insert of Jaejoong’s background. Enjoy! Please refer to the Author’s Note in the end for further information that may confuses you.
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Rush of steps along the wooden floor earns the attention of a man in his thirties who is spending his night confined in his study room. He is alerted knowing that his companion won't be coming home till later remembering what day is today. But then the slam of the door in beside the room of his study proves him otherwise. He leaves his work in his desk and rushes to the other room.
"Hyukkie?" He calls as he opens the door. There isn't an answer but sobs echoes and so he goes in further.
"Hyukkie?" He calls again and then a whimper in his right. He turns and sees his dongsaeng, curling beside the bedside table. He quickly goes to his dongsaeng and encases him in a hug, trying to comfort the other.
"Sssh..sssh...I'm here..." he coos because honestly he doesn't know what else to do. At times like this, he feels nostalgic. It just feels like it's just yesterday when he first has held Eunhyuk like this.
"He's back hyung... he's back.." Eunhyuk murmurs and it has taken a minute before it dawns to him to whom Eunhyuk is referring to.
"Hyukkie just gave you a punch? You actually deserve more than it... and stronger too."
Donghae looks to his right side upwards and there he saw the tallest in their group of friends, offering his hand which Donghae gladly takes. A grateful grin escapes his lips as rubs the back of his neck, not knowing what to say back.
And then there are a couple of tissues that enters his view and his eyes trails to whom the offer comes from.
"You know… a simple 'Tadaima' isn't really bad to hear from you and maybe I can guarantee I won't land a knuckle against your head."
"Tadaima, Nino hyung." Donghae finally murmurs, hesitant and shy.
Pak!
"Ow!" Donghae yelps and glares back to Yunho.
"Sorry, that doesn't apply to me, plus that's for ruining the dessert time." Yunho shrugs and goes back to their table. Donghae just clicks his tongue. He wipes the blood from his lips that has been created by the earlier punch, his eyes travelling towards Yunho who sits back, probably to finish his dessert. There's also Jaejoong in the table. He is looking at him hesitant but once their eyes have met, they both smile in recognition. And then there's also their oldest hyung, already has a sketch pad at hand who gives a nod before continuing on.
"Come on, there are still cream puffs. You and your friend can join us in our table." Nino says. And then direct his next words to the barista in the counter, "Yoochun-ah, just bring their drinks in our table. And it's on the house since the last owner finally decided to show up." Nino scoffs and then smirks at Donghae in his last words before joining back their group in the table.
"The last owner?"
Donghae's eyes widen and same goes for Sungmin but Nino just gives them another shrug and heads back to their table to join the others.
"I didn't know you're one of the famous owners of this cafe." Sungmin finally speaks when finally everything sinks in.
"I didn't know too. I-" Donghae is bewildered and then has caught some of Sungmin's words. "Famous people?" He asks.
"Well, it kinda suits them all. Everyone who patronizes this shop here knows how these five owners excel in their own fields…” Sungmin explains and started indicating how so everyone thinks of that, “First is Ohno Satoshi sshi, the famous stage and musical actor, then there’s Ninomiya Kazunari sshi, the director who really has eyes for good productions and add the fact he also composes, then there's also Jung Yunho sshi, the prince of the business world Seoul, and lastly is Kim Jaejoong-sshi, a renowned photographer. And I do hear he also composes with Ninomiya-sshi.." Sungmin explains, counting in his fingers the people involved in this cafe and when he is on his fifth finger, he looks at Donghae, "And then the one who punch you is Lee Hyukjae-sshi that receives a lot of recognition in the world of dance."
Donghae smiles learning about everything his friends' updates in one go. It isn't that detailed yet and still he is already proud. He knows everyone have worked hard to be where they are now; he has seen it on their college years. And he is quite disappointed he has missed those almost five years of being away.
"You know, even if you do awe us a lot of explanation. We won't really rush you." Donghae's reverie is interrupted and noticing only now that Jaejoong is actually beside him already.
"That is if you plan on telling us anyways. But we'll really appreciate even just a tad update about 'what's-up-with-you-lately' kind of thing." Jaejoong says as his right index finger and right thumb emphasize the little favor he is saying. Donghae gives a chuckle and then nods. Jaejoong replies with a grin and then shifts his attention Donghae’s companion.
"Hi, my name is Jaejoong. I hope this fish hasn't been an asshole to you. Come on, join us… uhm?" Jaejoong pauses not knowing what the other's name is.
"Just call me Sungmin..." Sungmin supplies and Jaejoong offers his hand for a shake that the former gladly took. He then ushers Sungmin towards their table. Sungmin gives Donghae first an amuse smile before following Jaejoong.
Donghae just replies with a grin, a proud one not until he realizes what Jaejoong has referred him to, "Oi! I'm not an asshole!"
Jaejoong glances back at him, sticking his tongue out. Donghae shakes his head. It really feels good to be home. But he wonders when will it actually last.
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Nino wakes up with a fresh start the next morning, brushing teeth first and then going for a quick shower. He doesn't have any plans at the moment except to finish some songs he's been working on and go on the shop like he usually does on Saturday afternoons. Even if deadlines are around the corner, he doesn't rush it. He'll try to confide it with Jaejoong afterwards anyways (and surely the said man will also be in the shop like he always does).
He strums his guitar and tries the chords. It's soft and slow at first then gradually the tempo increases. Maybe he can add drum beats later to make it more cheerful. Before he knows it, it's already a little pass lunch.
He hasn’t eaten yet so maybe he could just order something. He won't be going out soon till late in the afternoon anyways since he's planning at least three hours of quality time with his beloved game console. He smiles at himself, thinking he'll finally be able to kill the boss monster in that level. Because he is busy with setting up the new production they'd be starting soon, he has that level left out.
He goes to his kitchen and catches a pack of ramyun in the cupboard. “That will do.” He says to himself. He doesn’t really feel like cooking anyways. And so he starts boiling water for his meal, maybe also for a tea.As he waits for the water to boil, he leans his back from the counter as looks around. He’s been living in that apartment for almost six years ever since he started working. It isn’t too big or small. It’s just right for a person who is living alone. Of course there is another room for guest and one music room. But then usually, he just does it in the living room when he is composing and mainly that room is for recording. And then a painting has caught his eyes in the living room. From where he is standing, he could perfectly see the living room, especially the painting Ohno has given him before for his house warming party. Although it seems that the painting is out of place for it’s colorful hues contrasting his pad’s simple colors, Nino doesn’t bring it down for looking at it helps him to relax just like it’s painter.
“Guess, I better visit that old man…” He decides. Well, after he has killed that boss in his game to his heart’s content that is.
After finishing his meal, he smiles to his self. “Finally…” He says as he sets out to his game console but then he has to set it aside after his home phone rings and Nino can't help but to growl in annoyance.
"Yobeoseyo?" He murmurs not in the mood to talk. If it's just a useless call then surely he'll let out a fit for someone who dares waste his time and taking him away from his heaven.
"Moshi moshi? Nino-chan?" With the gentleness of the voice from the other line and the language the person is using, Nino smiles and his irritation is completely forgotten.
"Okaa-san, hisashiburi!"
"Good thing you are there. I thought you might be busy today." the middle age woman said in the other line after sighing a relief.
"Ah, don't worry about it. I won't be going out soon anyways." Nino reassures her. Of course, he doesn't mind talking to her since it's been almost a year before he had seen her and only through phone calls can they communicate.
He and Ohno have been busy with their works that they haven't got the time to visit her back in Japan. And he really enjoys talks like this. After all it's only with her that he can talk like this. He is eager and he doesn't mind admitting that. (Well just to her only anyways) and so he began filling her up with updates regarding what has been happening to him and Ohno. It took a good hour with mostly him complaining how Ohno is so dark now because of his frequent fishing trips lately.
"I tried to warn him okaa-san... to at least put some sun screen lotion but the old man doesn't listen." He complains while the woman in the other line is laughing at it, fondly and good naturedly. And when he unintentionally glances at the clock dangling in the wall, Nino knows the call is getting expensive. He finally decides it's time to bid farewell.
"Jah, okaa-san. It's been great talking to you but this is getting expensive and I don't want you to spend too much with this phone calls. Next time I'll be the one calling you okay?" Nino says and there is a giggle in the other line.
"You are still stingy, Nino-chan. I wonder where you got that trait. I'm sure no one in the family is that stingy."
He knew she doesn't mean any harm with those words but it triggers something inside Nino and he can't help but to be taken back.
"Nino-chan?"
There is a constraint in his chest and Nino knows he shouldn't overthink this once again. He has accepted this long time ago but then...
"Nino-chan? Are you okay? Is something wrong?" the tone of worry finally gets to Nino and so he talks to her.
"Ah, yes I'm fine. Don't worry. I was just fetching something." Nino lies not wanting to worry her at all. It isn't her fault. It's no one's fault. It is an accident after all.
"Ah. Jah, I won't take much of your time anymore. Please take care of Satoshi for me. And make sure you'll be here at least for a week this summer. And bring your friends with you okay? Oh, say hi to them for me…" She reminds him and Nino forces out a laugh just to make sure that it reassures her that everything is fine.
"Yes I will. And I'll let you know if we'll take that vacation." Nino says.
"Goodbye then and send my love to Satoshi for me and also some scolding too if you don't mind." The woman in the line kids and it manages to squish a smile from Nino.
"Yes, I will. And some beating too if you don't mind." Nino says and then there's a fit of giggle before Nino can manage to properly say goodbye. "Goodbye okaa-san."
Before he could hang up, he hears his name being called again. "And Nino..."
"Hmm?"
"Thank you for taking care of my son for me. I love you too."
And Nino hears the dial tone. He stands there for a good minute, a sigh and then a shake in his head afterwards. He closes his eyes and he feels overwhelmed yet also frustrated at the same time. Unshed tears has glistened his eyes and he doesn't want to shed it. It's been almost 17 years then. He takes a deep breath and looks at the watch. Guess he can just play tomorrow. Right now he really needs to make that visit before heading to the cafe.
Click!
Nino opens the door and looks around. "Oh-chan?" He calls but no one replies. He looks at the shoes rack by the entrance and the house slippers can't be seen, clearly stating that the said guy is home. He shrugs his shoulders knowing there's one place where Ohno can be if he can't hear him calling out.
"Guess he's working in his art room." Nino concludes and so he change to his own house slippers that he has left there and heads in further the apartment.
He secures his own copy of keys in his back pocket and walks swiftly towards the room. He has been living there with Ohno before when they are just exchanged students and so he knows where each room is located and since Ohno's art room is in the farthest room away from the main door, he knows Ohno can't probably hear if someone enters his apartment. He really needs to scold that old man for being so careless when it comes to these things but thinking again, it is actually the same scenario when it comes to his games. He doesn't realize someone has entered already his apartment unless that someone is blocking his view towards the monitor where his games are showing.
"Really, Nino hyung, you always scold Sato hyung about his habits when it comes to fishing when you are actually doing the same when it's about your games." He remembers Jaejoong saying it to him one time when the said male has come to his apartment before while he is in his playing spree and Nino can't help but laugh at how actually true it is. So to be fair, he won't scold Ohno anymore about these things. (Well, except about putting sun screen lotions since clearly Ohno is getting dark and it's really bad.)
Finally arriving at the last room, Nino turns the door knob, opening the door a little then peeks in.
"Oh-chan?" He calls but still no one is answering. Nino raises his eyebrow before opening the door wider. "Satoshi?" He calls again but as he scans the room' it seems no one is present at the room.
"And I though he's here." Nino mumbles as he looks around and it seems his speculations are correct that the said male has been there as he finds Ohno's work place a bit messy with old newspapers scattered in the floor. (Maybe to protect the floor from more mess coming from paint splatters.) Above it stands Ohno's art materials;brushes still in cans of paint and then in the painting stand, there it rests Ohno's new artwork.
Nino stares at it as he approaches it, analyzing every strokes and hues Ohno has used. It's a paint of two people and it seems they are watching a rainbow from a hill top. And Nino likes how Ohno has drawn it so alive that it feels you are also seeing the rainbow like those two in the painting. Unknowingly, Nino reaches out towards the painting, fingertips traces the colors.
It's a simple painting actually, a literal one that shouts what-you-see-is-what-you-get. It isn't abstract yet it feels so special.
"Woah..."
"Woah?"
"W-who are you?"
"I... I'm... I-"
"Kazu?"
Nino jumps back startled and he turns to his caller. He huffs a breath out and sends glares towards the culprit.
"You scared a hell out of me."
"Sorry." Ohno says subtly and sheepishly. The older of the two approaches his workplace while drying his hands. And judging by the wet strands of Ohno’s fringes, the older has been to the bathroom to maybe splash some water in his face. He stands there beside Nino as both of them marvels at his newest work.
"Nice painting." Nino compliments after a little silence and Ohno smiles contentedly. He put aside the towel he has been holding to wipe his hands and sits in the chair in front of the canvass. He pats the little space next to him and urges Nino to take it. Nino chuckles, rolling his eyes and muttering, "How could we even fit with this?” It’s true, since it's a chair only meant for one person yet Ohno still persists. He must be out of his mind for even to get this kind of idea. Nevertheless, Nino complies.
With all honesty, Nino enjoys moments like this one right now. It's mostly silence between them but it’s never uncomfortable. Maybe because they have known each other for so long that it seems words aren't that needed between them. It's always just presence between them, as they sit side by side, their shoulders to knees are glued together, warmness emits despite the chilling air the air condition produces or maybe because of that connection.
"You're going to the cafe later right?" Ohno asks and Nino hums as his reply.
"Yeah... I need to check the monthly income and see what we need to stock up." Nino adds and Ohno just gives a nod. He doesn't understand much about management, especially incomes and such yet it amazes him how Nino has managed to learn these things when clearly, the latter's actual course is directing stage plays and productions.
And then another silence before this time Nino finally breaks it, stating his purpose of coming there. "Your mother just called me, she says Hi..."
"Oh."
Nino raises an eyebrow to the elder, Ohno really has small reactions and it's hard squishing ones from him. He just shakes his head and continues. "She's asking us to at least visit her this coming summer. And we should also bring the boys."
Ohno chuckles and it makes Nino confuse. "What?!"
"It's just that it seems you adapted well with your motherly status with how you say ‘bring the boys’." Ohno says and Nino's eyes widens.
"Ha Ha~" Nino scoffs and gently bumps his shoulders to Ohno's who replied with the same gesture. They end up sharing a childish grin. Surely, they are already in their early thirties yet they act like a bunch of goofballs. Yet it isn't bad. Everyone can be young at heart.
"You better call your mother before she nags me." Nino says after a while and he has missed how instantly Ohno's eyes glint have changed from something cheerful to serious.
"Your mother is really caring so you should pay respect to her by at least calling her every other day." Nino continues his tone in a playful scold but with what Nino is saying; Ohno doesn't feel amuse towards it.
"Kazu..." Ohno calls softly but it's in a tone he rarely uses and Nino is busy stating things to notice. Nino says it in cheerful and calm but Ohno can hear that undeniably tone of sadness.
"You know I even stated to her how her son is so persistent in fishing without a sun screen lotion applied. Though your mother did give me permission to scold you..."
"Kazu." Ohno continues his tone now with warning.
"Your mother says to th-"
"Kazunari!"
Nino flinches and there are chills running in his spine with how Ohno has used his full name like that but he doesn't show it. He knows what Ohno means when he uses that kind of call and it usually happens if he talks about Ohno's mother.
"What?" He says with straight face and it makes Ohno to grit his teeth. He hates how Nino doesn't show how he really feels. He may bark comments, snarky and straightforward but he still he hides what he really feels and Ohno doesn't want that. At least to him, he wants Nino to be fully honest, to tell him what he likes or dislikes or what he feels may it be anger, frustration or sadness.
"I don't like how you say it." Ohno murmurs still with gritted teeth. Nino catches it, every word but he chooses ignorance.
"What Oh-chan? I don't think I say anything in a wrong way? Is my Japanese failing me already?" Nino asks, trying to sound clueless as possible. He knows he's acting like a spoiled brat (well, everyone does says that he is…) but what he says is the truth. Ohno sighs, defeated and tired and just shakes his head instead.
"Wait here, I'll just change and go with you to the shop." Ohno decides and Nino just gives a nod and watches as the elder goes out of the room and goes to his bed room.
Nino exhales the breathe he has been holding and looks back to the canvass once again. He then finally notices the iPod sitting in the brush holder that is attached to the canvass stand. He grabs it and it's still playing. He attaches one earphone in his ear and listens. His eyes widens for he recognizes that song.
"Niji?"
Niji is the first song he ever has composed but never has turned it to music companies. It is special and he keeps it to himself. Except that Jaejoong has found it before that he has given everyone a copy before Nino can even protest. It's already 8 years since then and Nino has thought that everyone has forgotten it already. (He does a tad bit has forgotten it.)
He lets it play as he now has put both ear phones in each of his ears. Since he knows it’s already in its finishing part he wants to hear how it is especially it’s the part he will be hitting high notes. But what surprises him the most is when it has ended, it plays again. He checks the screen and the mark in the upper right has proven the fact that it's playing in loop, and it isn't just the playlist but rather just one song, his song.
He looks again at the canvass and it dawns to him. "Is Oh-chan listening to this while painting?" He asks no one in particular but then he feels his cheeks warming and he doesn't understand why. Maybe because of embarrassment of hearing his voice back then and it is so croaky and shaky. It is his first recording back then after all and he knows his piano playing those times is rough unlike how years of practicing has done to him now. He feels embarrass that Ohno has to listen to this crappy thing while creating such a master piece.
"Kazu, Let's go..." Ohno calls but Nino doesn't move. He cocks his head in confusion. Surely his voice can be heard from the door right? He just approaches the still latter. That's when he finally sees what makes his voice to not reach Nino's ears. His eyes widen. But he tries not to act too nervous. It isn't wrong to listen to music right? He taps Nino's shoulder and removes one ear piece so the younger can hear him. "Let's go."
Nino looks at him, dumbfounded and lost and Ohno thinks Nino is looking so cute right that moment.
"You're listening to it?" Nino asks, still not believing. And Ohno raises an eyebrow with how Nino looks so shock at that discovery. Is it a crime to do so? Is Nino mad that he is listening to it without his permission?
"Err, yes?" Ohno replies but doesn't know whether it's what Nino wants to hear from him.
"But... it's a crap..." Nino giveshis reason for his astonishment and it has made Ohno to sigh in relief that Nino only thinks of it as that. (Although he doesn't like how Nino belittle his very own master piece) At least Nino doesn't inquire more why Ohno is listening to it in repeat.(And only to that song only.)
"Come on. We better go." He changes the topic and hauls Nino up and gently guides him to the front door but not forgetting to close his art room after one glance at his latest art work as he remembers the last part of the lyrics of Niji.
The rainbow is really pretty
No it's you that's prettier
To the you who's starting to be shy
Thank you
Thank you.
Just like the one Ohno has painted, one of the two subjects in the paintingis looking at the rainbow in awe while the other is marveling at the beauty not of the rainbow but the beauty beside him.
Too bad Nino is too preoccupied with how embarrassing his song is to notice how Ohno has been inspired to create a masterpiece from that said ‘crappy song’.
They arrive at the shop and if you think it will be empty since students don't have classes today and most workers have their day offs, better think again. It is crowded but not that full to the point there are no vacant seats to take. It's still manageable for two workers and one of the owners to serve customers. (Plus two more owners are actually present and another two have arrived. Yes, only one of the owners is absent and surely girls who keep their eyes to the owners are feasting with handsome faces.)
"Irishaimase!"
Nino smirks at Jaejoong's greeting once they have reached the cafe. Like always if Jaejoong doesn't have schedule for photo shoots, he'll be in the cafe helping in serving the customers.
"Kamsahamnida." Nino replies with mirth and Jaejoong grins at that before serving an old couple some drinks. Nino goes to their table after seeing Yunho there and someone he thought he’ll never see, not until yesterday night that is. Ohno follows him after greeting Jaejoong and their workers.
"I see you decided to show up." He remarks at the occupants of their table.
"Hey, hyung." Yunho grins and Nino just gives a nod of acknowledgement.
"Hi Nino hyung…" Donghae murmurs and Nino understands why Donghae is still hesitant around them. Who won't be when the latter disappeared and just re-appeared again? Surely, there is some gap.
"So, did myeolchi decided to show up too or still no?" Nino asks and even if Nino sounds so teasing and carefree, deep inside he means it and he is very worried.
"Well, if Hyukjae did go here, maybe this guy will have another bruise in his face." Yunho answers, pointing at Donghae who indeed still sports a bruise from yesterday's punch. The latter gives a growl but doesn't speak. Nino doesn't comment also and just shakes his head. He then just goes to the counter to get their records and such.
"Oh, hi Ohno hyung." Yunho then greets their eldest hyung who sits beside him. Donghae also just gives a small hello which Ohno answers with a smile and nod. Jaejoong joins them, bringing with him some drinks.
"Thanks Jae." Yunho is grateful. It is his day off but numbers and charts and words occupies his head right that moment. He has a presentation this coming Monday and he doesn't want to come unprepared. Good thing Donghae has agreed in helping him and he can get a thing or two from him that can help with the presentation.
Even if they met him just yesterday night, they haven't known much about Donghae's whereabouts except what Sungmin has said, that Donghae has just arrived that yesterday night to settle and so with the help of Yunho, Donghae manages to find a decent apartment to stay quickly especially with Yunho and so Donghae consider this a little payback.
Jaejoong notices that everyone has their own business. He has known Yunho has a presentation coming up and has asked for Donghae's help to make it more presentable. Ohno on the other hand seems to be reviewing his script, judging from the book he just takes out. He knows there's nothing he can do more and so he leaves them be.
He approaches his Nino hyung instead who is discussing something to Yoochun before the older dismisses the younger. Since there aren't any customers to serve yet and Yoochun and Ryeowook can still handle it, he decides to talk to Nino.
"So, are there any songs yet hyung?" He asks. He knows he sounds demanding but then Nino has mentioned before that he will consult him about some new songs.
"Yeah, there is. I didn't bring it though." Nino answers although his attention is in their records, and jolting some things. Nino then takes the big notebook and starts making his way towards their storage room. Jaejoong looks around and everything is just calm. Surely, Yoochun and Ryeowook can handle it. He follows Nino then since there's no better to do than help his Nino hyung in inventory.
"I wonder if Hyukkie is okay." Jaejoong breaks their silence after a while and then starts counting the packs and plastic cups in regular size.
“Guess we need to stock up regular size cups, hyung.” Jaejoong reports and Nino jolts it down. After jolting it, Nino still doesn't look at Jaejoong's direction although he knows the younger one is waiting for him to say something about his earlier statement. A sigh escapes his lips and then closes his notebook.
"I can't say for sure but we can't do anything about it unless Eunhyuk wants us to do something." Nino answers and Jaejoong gives a nod. He is extremely worried but he doesn’t know how to comfort Eunhyuk. He has seen how Eunhyuk almost lost everything back then and now that Donghae is back, he doesn’t know how Eunhyuk will take it.
Five years ago have been down right to Eunhyuk. There have been cries and muteness. There have been empty smiles and longing gazes and even if Eunhyuk has been saying to them that he is fine, they have known what he truly feels. It’s only when he is dancing when they can see a life in his eyes by then. But now, they are thankful that a saying 'Only in time can a person heal' does exist because little by little, Eunhyuk's genuine smile has returned. It isn't the same but still it is better. But then what if the past catches up with time how will it go then?
Jaejoong is fiddling with necktie when Nino has spoken again.
“By the way, Ohno’s mother just called me. She said hi. She says we should have at least a vacation there this coming summer...” Nino brings out the news and Jaejoong grins at that.
He really likes Ohno’s mother. The first time he has met her is when he is in his sophomore year. Nino and Ohno have just graduated and it is summer vacation for them. So, the two have decided to bring them along with them as a celebration. She is really lovely and gentle and very accommodating. She even let him and Nino cook most of the time in their one month stay and even call them her sons.
Of course he has his mother, who is also a mother to eight older women. And so he feels a bit different with how Ohno's mother treats him unlike how his mother treats him. Of course, it isn't bad really. His mother is also lovely. Maybe just because he is in a house surrounded by nine women all the time, it's a whole different thing being in a house surrounded by only at least two women and mostly men. (Well Ohno has an older sister) And then it dawns to him, remembering Nino's situation back then which is quite similar to his actual situation.
“Nino hyung, have you ever met your parents?” Jaejoong asks and he knows he is crossing boundaries but he has been curious for so long he has known Nino.
When they have that vacation before, they have learned that Nino actually lives with the Ohno’s his entire life, a very similar scenario to him as he is living with the Kim’s.
“No...” Nino says and Jaejoong is left clueless as more questions pop up yet only one has managed to come out from his dry lips.
“How come?”
There is a pause as Nino’s eyes have met his. Jaejoong blinks, biting his lower lip at the process and he can feel himself being nervous again. Sure, he and Nino have gotten pretty close for they always work the best when it comes to composing and cooking. Also, their personalities don’t really differ much but Jaejoong can’t remove the uneasiness he feels whenever Nino looks at him like that.
It feels like Nino can see right through your soul with those eyes. He knows how Nino can be so observant, pointing things that is needed to be pointed, may it be little or big. But there is something when Nino looks to you in the eyes. Maybe it is just to him but then he has seen that same look Nino emits before, but that time it has been given to Eunhyuk when Donghae first has introduced Eunhyuk to the group. And base on Eunhyuk’s reaction, the latter is feeling the same as he is. Even so, Jaejoong doesn’t particularly hate that. It just that it feels there is something else in that feeling and he wants to know what is it.
“How about you Jaejoong..." Nino starts and with the calmness yet the hint of seriousness in Nino's tone, Jaejoong can't help but to gulp inwardly.
"Have you ever met your real parents?” Nino asks back and Jaejoong is a bit taken back. But then it isn’t really a secret about his origin.
Yes, he is adopted by the Kim's household.
To him, his childhood is blurry and only bits can be recalled (more like nothing can be really recalled, not even his childhood with all of his noona). All he can remember is the constant feeling of being with Yunho all the time. (And they aren't even living in the same roof. How come is it like that?)
When he has turned sixteen when he has started questioning his origin and Yunho steps up to patiently supplied him those details.
Yunho has narrated that both their parents have been friends with the Kim's. Since the children of the Kim's are all older than them (and all females he may add), they are most likely to be together since they are in the similar age. When his parents have died in an accident where he also got his amnesia and that’s when the Kim household has taken him in and Jaejoong doesn’t question more. Because it's always the same answer he'll get.
"You have a severe amnesia Jaejoong. That's why you don't remember.”
“I dunno… they showed me pictures but it never triggered a single emotion. They say I’m still suffering from amnesia but then…” Jaejoong’s words falter as he admits it. He is confused.
He has been living with his amnesia for like 12 years already. Isn’t it about time for him to recall a bit some? Like actual memories, even just the details of the accident. He has searched before as curiousness eats him up. They say if a person is suffering from amnesia, the first thing he remembers is either he remembers the day he has gotten to the accident or his fondest memories.
But why only the feeling of being with Yunho is the only thing he can remember? Of course he treasures that feeling. But then he can't visualize it. No remnants of scent, or sight, not even sounds. Is his amnesia that severe? Should he be in comatose if that is the case?
His head aches and that is the reason why he chooses not to question more. He learns a person cannot dwell in the past because there is the present and a future coming.
At the end of his trance, he notices that Nino is looking at him, but it seems his mind is in a distant. And he wonders if there is something wrong with what he has said.
“I haven't met them..." Nino repeats his answer in a more precise way and when Jaejoong is about to repeat his question about that, Nino beats him to it.
"...because I don't have."
It is straight and direct but it has left Jaejoong more confuse. What does Nino mean by that? And he somehow knows there's something more than that.
Chapter 1b | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3
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Author’s Notes:
Yahoo! Although I havefinished this chapter even before I have posted chapter 1, I am just able to upload this now since I haven’t finished chapter three and I really like to have at least one chapter advance in my hand. But I guess it is safe to release this because I somehow manage to write half of chapter three. I dunno why but I’m suddenly having a writer’s block with Yunjae. Well, maybe because Yunjae’s story is a bit complicated. Anyways, before I bore you with useless crap here, I better stop and just get it on with.
I am able to finish the outline, well almost actually and I think I’ll stick to that till I have already posted till chapter 15 or else my muse might suddenly leave me. Aside from that, everything is cool. I would also appreciate some comments and criticisms. Although I
just do this out of fun and personal entertainment, it also makes me happy if readers could share their thoughts with me. Thank you again for taking time in reading this.
Terms used in this chapter:
Hisashiburi - means Long time no see in Japanese.
Moshi Moshi - Usual first greeting if you’re answering phone calls like Hello in Japanese
Yeoboseyo - Usual first greeting if you’re answering phone calls like Hello in Korean
Myeolchi - means anchovy in Korean
Irishaimase - means welcome in Japanese. Usual greeting of staffs if customers enter establishments.
Kamsahamnida - means thank you in Korean, the formal way.
Niji - means rainbow in Japanese. Nino’s solo song for Arashi’s Dream A- Live album.
Bonus Facts: (Just for fun XD Please bear with me. Hahahaha~)
Have you ever wonder what if this story just involves one fandom, who’s going to play the main characters?
For Super Junior, I’ll still go for the original plan such as HaeHyuk, KyuMin (Cho Kyuhyun and Lee Sungmin) will take Yunjae’s roles but then I might change HanChul (Hangeng and Kim Heechul) rather than YeWook for Ohmiya’s roles.
For Arashi fandom, Ohmiya will still take their respective roles, Sakuraiba will take YunJae’s while JunMao (Matsumoto Jun and Inoue Mao) couple will take HaeHyuk’s, and that couple will probably the first het I’ll right in Arashi fandom. *grins*
For DBSK fandom, YunJae will take now Ohmiya’s roles, while Yoosu (Park Yoochun and Kim Junsu) will take HaeHyuk’s role and ChangKyu (Shim Changmin and Cho Kyuhyun) will take Yunjae’s roles.
That’s all, Have a nice day!!!
PS: Can someone explain to me how come this 6000+ word chapter can be posted in one post when a 5000+ word chapter needed to be posted in two posts? LJ, you are confusing me. Aigoo!
Fandom: Arashi, DBSK/JYJ, Super Junior
Pairing: HaeHyuk (Lee Donghae/Lee Hyukjae), Ohmiya (Ohno Satoshi/Ninomiya Kazunari), YunJae (Jung Yunho/ Kim Jaejoong)
Rating: PG-13 to R
Genre: AU, Drama/Angst, Fantasy, Romance
Chapter - Word Count: Chapter 2 - 6 231 words
Summary: How can two people love each other when only one of them is entitled to exist to love and be loved?
Warning: Unbeta-ed
Author’s Notes: More background of Ohno and Nino’s side. *grins* Although a bit insert of Jaejoong’s background. Enjoy! Please refer to the Author’s Note in the end for further information that may confuses you.
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Rush of steps along the wooden floor earns the attention of a man in his thirties who is spending his night confined in his study room. He is alerted knowing that his companion won't be coming home till later remembering what day is today. But then the slam of the door in beside the room of his study proves him otherwise. He leaves his work in his desk and rushes to the other room.
"Hyukkie?" He calls as he opens the door. There isn't an answer but sobs echoes and so he goes in further.
"Hyukkie?" He calls again and then a whimper in his right. He turns and sees his dongsaeng, curling beside the bedside table. He quickly goes to his dongsaeng and encases him in a hug, trying to comfort the other.
"Sssh..sssh...I'm here..." he coos because honestly he doesn't know what else to do. At times like this, he feels nostalgic. It just feels like it's just yesterday when he first has held Eunhyuk like this.
"He's back hyung... he's back.." Eunhyuk murmurs and it has taken a minute before it dawns to him to whom Eunhyuk is referring to.
"Hyukkie just gave you a punch? You actually deserve more than it... and stronger too."
Donghae looks to his right side upwards and there he saw the tallest in their group of friends, offering his hand which Donghae gladly takes. A grateful grin escapes his lips as rubs the back of his neck, not knowing what to say back.
And then there are a couple of tissues that enters his view and his eyes trails to whom the offer comes from.
"You know… a simple 'Tadaima' isn't really bad to hear from you and maybe I can guarantee I won't land a knuckle against your head."
"Tadaima, Nino hyung." Donghae finally murmurs, hesitant and shy.
Pak!
"Ow!" Donghae yelps and glares back to Yunho.
"Sorry, that doesn't apply to me, plus that's for ruining the dessert time." Yunho shrugs and goes back to their table. Donghae just clicks his tongue. He wipes the blood from his lips that has been created by the earlier punch, his eyes travelling towards Yunho who sits back, probably to finish his dessert. There's also Jaejoong in the table. He is looking at him hesitant but once their eyes have met, they both smile in recognition. And then there's also their oldest hyung, already has a sketch pad at hand who gives a nod before continuing on.
"Come on, there are still cream puffs. You and your friend can join us in our table." Nino says. And then direct his next words to the barista in the counter, "Yoochun-ah, just bring their drinks in our table. And it's on the house since the last owner finally decided to show up." Nino scoffs and then smirks at Donghae in his last words before joining back their group in the table.
"The last owner?"
Donghae's eyes widen and same goes for Sungmin but Nino just gives them another shrug and heads back to their table to join the others.
"I didn't know you're one of the famous owners of this cafe." Sungmin finally speaks when finally everything sinks in.
"I didn't know too. I-" Donghae is bewildered and then has caught some of Sungmin's words. "Famous people?" He asks.
"Well, it kinda suits them all. Everyone who patronizes this shop here knows how these five owners excel in their own fields…” Sungmin explains and started indicating how so everyone thinks of that, “First is Ohno Satoshi sshi, the famous stage and musical actor, then there’s Ninomiya Kazunari sshi, the director who really has eyes for good productions and add the fact he also composes, then there's also Jung Yunho sshi, the prince of the business world Seoul, and lastly is Kim Jaejoong-sshi, a renowned photographer. And I do hear he also composes with Ninomiya-sshi.." Sungmin explains, counting in his fingers the people involved in this cafe and when he is on his fifth finger, he looks at Donghae, "And then the one who punch you is Lee Hyukjae-sshi that receives a lot of recognition in the world of dance."
Donghae smiles learning about everything his friends' updates in one go. It isn't that detailed yet and still he is already proud. He knows everyone have worked hard to be where they are now; he has seen it on their college years. And he is quite disappointed he has missed those almost five years of being away.
"You know, even if you do awe us a lot of explanation. We won't really rush you." Donghae's reverie is interrupted and noticing only now that Jaejoong is actually beside him already.
"That is if you plan on telling us anyways. But we'll really appreciate even just a tad update about 'what's-up-with-you-lately' kind of thing." Jaejoong says as his right index finger and right thumb emphasize the little favor he is saying. Donghae gives a chuckle and then nods. Jaejoong replies with a grin and then shifts his attention Donghae’s companion.
"Hi, my name is Jaejoong. I hope this fish hasn't been an asshole to you. Come on, join us… uhm?" Jaejoong pauses not knowing what the other's name is.
"Just call me Sungmin..." Sungmin supplies and Jaejoong offers his hand for a shake that the former gladly took. He then ushers Sungmin towards their table. Sungmin gives Donghae first an amuse smile before following Jaejoong.
Donghae just replies with a grin, a proud one not until he realizes what Jaejoong has referred him to, "Oi! I'm not an asshole!"
Jaejoong glances back at him, sticking his tongue out. Donghae shakes his head. It really feels good to be home. But he wonders when will it actually last.
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Nino wakes up with a fresh start the next morning, brushing teeth first and then going for a quick shower. He doesn't have any plans at the moment except to finish some songs he's been working on and go on the shop like he usually does on Saturday afternoons. Even if deadlines are around the corner, he doesn't rush it. He'll try to confide it with Jaejoong afterwards anyways (and surely the said man will also be in the shop like he always does).
He strums his guitar and tries the chords. It's soft and slow at first then gradually the tempo increases. Maybe he can add drum beats later to make it more cheerful. Before he knows it, it's already a little pass lunch.
He hasn’t eaten yet so maybe he could just order something. He won't be going out soon till late in the afternoon anyways since he's planning at least three hours of quality time with his beloved game console. He smiles at himself, thinking he'll finally be able to kill the boss monster in that level. Because he is busy with setting up the new production they'd be starting soon, he has that level left out.
He goes to his kitchen and catches a pack of ramyun in the cupboard. “That will do.” He says to himself. He doesn’t really feel like cooking anyways. And so he starts boiling water for his meal, maybe also for a tea.As he waits for the water to boil, he leans his back from the counter as looks around. He’s been living in that apartment for almost six years ever since he started working. It isn’t too big or small. It’s just right for a person who is living alone. Of course there is another room for guest and one music room. But then usually, he just does it in the living room when he is composing and mainly that room is for recording. And then a painting has caught his eyes in the living room. From where he is standing, he could perfectly see the living room, especially the painting Ohno has given him before for his house warming party. Although it seems that the painting is out of place for it’s colorful hues contrasting his pad’s simple colors, Nino doesn’t bring it down for looking at it helps him to relax just like it’s painter.
“Guess, I better visit that old man…” He decides. Well, after he has killed that boss in his game to his heart’s content that is.
After finishing his meal, he smiles to his self. “Finally…” He says as he sets out to his game console but then he has to set it aside after his home phone rings and Nino can't help but to growl in annoyance.
"Yobeoseyo?" He murmurs not in the mood to talk. If it's just a useless call then surely he'll let out a fit for someone who dares waste his time and taking him away from his heaven.
"Moshi moshi? Nino-chan?" With the gentleness of the voice from the other line and the language the person is using, Nino smiles and his irritation is completely forgotten.
"Okaa-san, hisashiburi!"
"Good thing you are there. I thought you might be busy today." the middle age woman said in the other line after sighing a relief.
"Ah, don't worry about it. I won't be going out soon anyways." Nino reassures her. Of course, he doesn't mind talking to her since it's been almost a year before he had seen her and only through phone calls can they communicate.
He and Ohno have been busy with their works that they haven't got the time to visit her back in Japan. And he really enjoys talks like this. After all it's only with her that he can talk like this. He is eager and he doesn't mind admitting that. (Well just to her only anyways) and so he began filling her up with updates regarding what has been happening to him and Ohno. It took a good hour with mostly him complaining how Ohno is so dark now because of his frequent fishing trips lately.
"I tried to warn him okaa-san... to at least put some sun screen lotion but the old man doesn't listen." He complains while the woman in the other line is laughing at it, fondly and good naturedly. And when he unintentionally glances at the clock dangling in the wall, Nino knows the call is getting expensive. He finally decides it's time to bid farewell.
"Jah, okaa-san. It's been great talking to you but this is getting expensive and I don't want you to spend too much with this phone calls. Next time I'll be the one calling you okay?" Nino says and there is a giggle in the other line.
"You are still stingy, Nino-chan. I wonder where you got that trait. I'm sure no one in the family is that stingy."
He knew she doesn't mean any harm with those words but it triggers something inside Nino and he can't help but to be taken back.
"Nino-chan?"
There is a constraint in his chest and Nino knows he shouldn't overthink this once again. He has accepted this long time ago but then...
"Nino-chan? Are you okay? Is something wrong?" the tone of worry finally gets to Nino and so he talks to her.
"Ah, yes I'm fine. Don't worry. I was just fetching something." Nino lies not wanting to worry her at all. It isn't her fault. It's no one's fault. It is an accident after all.
"Ah. Jah, I won't take much of your time anymore. Please take care of Satoshi for me. And make sure you'll be here at least for a week this summer. And bring your friends with you okay? Oh, say hi to them for me…" She reminds him and Nino forces out a laugh just to make sure that it reassures her that everything is fine.
"Yes I will. And I'll let you know if we'll take that vacation." Nino says.
"Goodbye then and send my love to Satoshi for me and also some scolding too if you don't mind." The woman in the line kids and it manages to squish a smile from Nino.
"Yes, I will. And some beating too if you don't mind." Nino says and then there's a fit of giggle before Nino can manage to properly say goodbye. "Goodbye okaa-san."
Before he could hang up, he hears his name being called again. "And Nino..."
"Hmm?"
"Thank you for taking care of my son for me. I love you too."
And Nino hears the dial tone. He stands there for a good minute, a sigh and then a shake in his head afterwards. He closes his eyes and he feels overwhelmed yet also frustrated at the same time. Unshed tears has glistened his eyes and he doesn't want to shed it. It's been almost 17 years then. He takes a deep breath and looks at the watch. Guess he can just play tomorrow. Right now he really needs to make that visit before heading to the cafe.
Click!
Nino opens the door and looks around. "Oh-chan?" He calls but no one replies. He looks at the shoes rack by the entrance and the house slippers can't be seen, clearly stating that the said guy is home. He shrugs his shoulders knowing there's one place where Ohno can be if he can't hear him calling out.
"Guess he's working in his art room." Nino concludes and so he change to his own house slippers that he has left there and heads in further the apartment.
He secures his own copy of keys in his back pocket and walks swiftly towards the room. He has been living there with Ohno before when they are just exchanged students and so he knows where each room is located and since Ohno's art room is in the farthest room away from the main door, he knows Ohno can't probably hear if someone enters his apartment. He really needs to scold that old man for being so careless when it comes to these things but thinking again, it is actually the same scenario when it comes to his games. He doesn't realize someone has entered already his apartment unless that someone is blocking his view towards the monitor where his games are showing.
"Really, Nino hyung, you always scold Sato hyung about his habits when it comes to fishing when you are actually doing the same when it's about your games." He remembers Jaejoong saying it to him one time when the said male has come to his apartment before while he is in his playing spree and Nino can't help but laugh at how actually true it is. So to be fair, he won't scold Ohno anymore about these things. (Well, except about putting sun screen lotions since clearly Ohno is getting dark and it's really bad.)
Finally arriving at the last room, Nino turns the door knob, opening the door a little then peeks in.
"Oh-chan?" He calls but still no one is answering. Nino raises his eyebrow before opening the door wider. "Satoshi?" He calls again but as he scans the room' it seems no one is present at the room.
"And I though he's here." Nino mumbles as he looks around and it seems his speculations are correct that the said male has been there as he finds Ohno's work place a bit messy with old newspapers scattered in the floor. (Maybe to protect the floor from more mess coming from paint splatters.) Above it stands Ohno's art materials;brushes still in cans of paint and then in the painting stand, there it rests Ohno's new artwork.
Nino stares at it as he approaches it, analyzing every strokes and hues Ohno has used. It's a paint of two people and it seems they are watching a rainbow from a hill top. And Nino likes how Ohno has drawn it so alive that it feels you are also seeing the rainbow like those two in the painting. Unknowingly, Nino reaches out towards the painting, fingertips traces the colors.
It's a simple painting actually, a literal one that shouts what-you-see-is-what-you-get. It isn't abstract yet it feels so special.
"Woah..."
"Woah?"
"W-who are you?"
"I... I'm... I-"
"Kazu?"
Nino jumps back startled and he turns to his caller. He huffs a breath out and sends glares towards the culprit.
"You scared a hell out of me."
"Sorry." Ohno says subtly and sheepishly. The older of the two approaches his workplace while drying his hands. And judging by the wet strands of Ohno’s fringes, the older has been to the bathroom to maybe splash some water in his face. He stands there beside Nino as both of them marvels at his newest work.
"Nice painting." Nino compliments after a little silence and Ohno smiles contentedly. He put aside the towel he has been holding to wipe his hands and sits in the chair in front of the canvass. He pats the little space next to him and urges Nino to take it. Nino chuckles, rolling his eyes and muttering, "How could we even fit with this?” It’s true, since it's a chair only meant for one person yet Ohno still persists. He must be out of his mind for even to get this kind of idea. Nevertheless, Nino complies.
With all honesty, Nino enjoys moments like this one right now. It's mostly silence between them but it’s never uncomfortable. Maybe because they have known each other for so long that it seems words aren't that needed between them. It's always just presence between them, as they sit side by side, their shoulders to knees are glued together, warmness emits despite the chilling air the air condition produces or maybe because of that connection.
"You're going to the cafe later right?" Ohno asks and Nino hums as his reply.
"Yeah... I need to check the monthly income and see what we need to stock up." Nino adds and Ohno just gives a nod. He doesn't understand much about management, especially incomes and such yet it amazes him how Nino has managed to learn these things when clearly, the latter's actual course is directing stage plays and productions.
And then another silence before this time Nino finally breaks it, stating his purpose of coming there. "Your mother just called me, she says Hi..."
"Oh."
Nino raises an eyebrow to the elder, Ohno really has small reactions and it's hard squishing ones from him. He just shakes his head and continues. "She's asking us to at least visit her this coming summer. And we should also bring the boys."
Ohno chuckles and it makes Nino confuse. "What?!"
"It's just that it seems you adapted well with your motherly status with how you say ‘bring the boys’." Ohno says and Nino's eyes widens.
"Ha Ha~" Nino scoffs and gently bumps his shoulders to Ohno's who replied with the same gesture. They end up sharing a childish grin. Surely, they are already in their early thirties yet they act like a bunch of goofballs. Yet it isn't bad. Everyone can be young at heart.
"You better call your mother before she nags me." Nino says after a while and he has missed how instantly Ohno's eyes glint have changed from something cheerful to serious.
"Your mother is really caring so you should pay respect to her by at least calling her every other day." Nino continues his tone in a playful scold but with what Nino is saying; Ohno doesn't feel amuse towards it.
"Kazu..." Ohno calls softly but it's in a tone he rarely uses and Nino is busy stating things to notice. Nino says it in cheerful and calm but Ohno can hear that undeniably tone of sadness.
"You know I even stated to her how her son is so persistent in fishing without a sun screen lotion applied. Though your mother did give me permission to scold you..."
"Kazu." Ohno continues his tone now with warning.
"Your mother says to th-"
"Kazunari!"
Nino flinches and there are chills running in his spine with how Ohno has used his full name like that but he doesn't show it. He knows what Ohno means when he uses that kind of call and it usually happens if he talks about Ohno's mother.
"What?" He says with straight face and it makes Ohno to grit his teeth. He hates how Nino doesn't show how he really feels. He may bark comments, snarky and straightforward but he still he hides what he really feels and Ohno doesn't want that. At least to him, he wants Nino to be fully honest, to tell him what he likes or dislikes or what he feels may it be anger, frustration or sadness.
"I don't like how you say it." Ohno murmurs still with gritted teeth. Nino catches it, every word but he chooses ignorance.
"What Oh-chan? I don't think I say anything in a wrong way? Is my Japanese failing me already?" Nino asks, trying to sound clueless as possible. He knows he's acting like a spoiled brat (well, everyone does says that he is…) but what he says is the truth. Ohno sighs, defeated and tired and just shakes his head instead.
"Wait here, I'll just change and go with you to the shop." Ohno decides and Nino just gives a nod and watches as the elder goes out of the room and goes to his bed room.
Nino exhales the breathe he has been holding and looks back to the canvass once again. He then finally notices the iPod sitting in the brush holder that is attached to the canvass stand. He grabs it and it's still playing. He attaches one earphone in his ear and listens. His eyes widens for he recognizes that song.
"Niji?"
Niji is the first song he ever has composed but never has turned it to music companies. It is special and he keeps it to himself. Except that Jaejoong has found it before that he has given everyone a copy before Nino can even protest. It's already 8 years since then and Nino has thought that everyone has forgotten it already. (He does a tad bit has forgotten it.)
He lets it play as he now has put both ear phones in each of his ears. Since he knows it’s already in its finishing part he wants to hear how it is especially it’s the part he will be hitting high notes. But what surprises him the most is when it has ended, it plays again. He checks the screen and the mark in the upper right has proven the fact that it's playing in loop, and it isn't just the playlist but rather just one song, his song.
He looks again at the canvass and it dawns to him. "Is Oh-chan listening to this while painting?" He asks no one in particular but then he feels his cheeks warming and he doesn't understand why. Maybe because of embarrassment of hearing his voice back then and it is so croaky and shaky. It is his first recording back then after all and he knows his piano playing those times is rough unlike how years of practicing has done to him now. He feels embarrass that Ohno has to listen to this crappy thing while creating such a master piece.
"Kazu, Let's go..." Ohno calls but Nino doesn't move. He cocks his head in confusion. Surely his voice can be heard from the door right? He just approaches the still latter. That's when he finally sees what makes his voice to not reach Nino's ears. His eyes widen. But he tries not to act too nervous. It isn't wrong to listen to music right? He taps Nino's shoulder and removes one ear piece so the younger can hear him. "Let's go."
Nino looks at him, dumbfounded and lost and Ohno thinks Nino is looking so cute right that moment.
"You're listening to it?" Nino asks, still not believing. And Ohno raises an eyebrow with how Nino looks so shock at that discovery. Is it a crime to do so? Is Nino mad that he is listening to it without his permission?
"Err, yes?" Ohno replies but doesn't know whether it's what Nino wants to hear from him.
"But... it's a crap..." Nino giveshis reason for his astonishment and it has made Ohno to sigh in relief that Nino only thinks of it as that. (Although he doesn't like how Nino belittle his very own master piece) At least Nino doesn't inquire more why Ohno is listening to it in repeat.(And only to that song only.)
"Come on. We better go." He changes the topic and hauls Nino up and gently guides him to the front door but not forgetting to close his art room after one glance at his latest art work as he remembers the last part of the lyrics of Niji.
The rainbow is really pretty
No it's you that's prettier
To the you who's starting to be shy
Thank you
Thank you.
Just like the one Ohno has painted, one of the two subjects in the paintingis looking at the rainbow in awe while the other is marveling at the beauty not of the rainbow but the beauty beside him.
Too bad Nino is too preoccupied with how embarrassing his song is to notice how Ohno has been inspired to create a masterpiece from that said ‘crappy song’.
They arrive at the shop and if you think it will be empty since students don't have classes today and most workers have their day offs, better think again. It is crowded but not that full to the point there are no vacant seats to take. It's still manageable for two workers and one of the owners to serve customers. (Plus two more owners are actually present and another two have arrived. Yes, only one of the owners is absent and surely girls who keep their eyes to the owners are feasting with handsome faces.)
"Irishaimase!"
Nino smirks at Jaejoong's greeting once they have reached the cafe. Like always if Jaejoong doesn't have schedule for photo shoots, he'll be in the cafe helping in serving the customers.
"Kamsahamnida." Nino replies with mirth and Jaejoong grins at that before serving an old couple some drinks. Nino goes to their table after seeing Yunho there and someone he thought he’ll never see, not until yesterday night that is. Ohno follows him after greeting Jaejoong and their workers.
"I see you decided to show up." He remarks at the occupants of their table.
"Hey, hyung." Yunho grins and Nino just gives a nod of acknowledgement.
"Hi Nino hyung…" Donghae murmurs and Nino understands why Donghae is still hesitant around them. Who won't be when the latter disappeared and just re-appeared again? Surely, there is some gap.
"So, did myeolchi decided to show up too or still no?" Nino asks and even if Nino sounds so teasing and carefree, deep inside he means it and he is very worried.
"Well, if Hyukjae did go here, maybe this guy will have another bruise in his face." Yunho answers, pointing at Donghae who indeed still sports a bruise from yesterday's punch. The latter gives a growl but doesn't speak. Nino doesn't comment also and just shakes his head. He then just goes to the counter to get their records and such.
"Oh, hi Ohno hyung." Yunho then greets their eldest hyung who sits beside him. Donghae also just gives a small hello which Ohno answers with a smile and nod. Jaejoong joins them, bringing with him some drinks.
"Thanks Jae." Yunho is grateful. It is his day off but numbers and charts and words occupies his head right that moment. He has a presentation this coming Monday and he doesn't want to come unprepared. Good thing Donghae has agreed in helping him and he can get a thing or two from him that can help with the presentation.
Even if they met him just yesterday night, they haven't known much about Donghae's whereabouts except what Sungmin has said, that Donghae has just arrived that yesterday night to settle and so with the help of Yunho, Donghae manages to find a decent apartment to stay quickly especially with Yunho and so Donghae consider this a little payback.
Jaejoong notices that everyone has their own business. He has known Yunho has a presentation coming up and has asked for Donghae's help to make it more presentable. Ohno on the other hand seems to be reviewing his script, judging from the book he just takes out. He knows there's nothing he can do more and so he leaves them be.
He approaches his Nino hyung instead who is discussing something to Yoochun before the older dismisses the younger. Since there aren't any customers to serve yet and Yoochun and Ryeowook can still handle it, he decides to talk to Nino.
"So, are there any songs yet hyung?" He asks. He knows he sounds demanding but then Nino has mentioned before that he will consult him about some new songs.
"Yeah, there is. I didn't bring it though." Nino answers although his attention is in their records, and jolting some things. Nino then takes the big notebook and starts making his way towards their storage room. Jaejoong looks around and everything is just calm. Surely, Yoochun and Ryeowook can handle it. He follows Nino then since there's no better to do than help his Nino hyung in inventory.
"I wonder if Hyukkie is okay." Jaejoong breaks their silence after a while and then starts counting the packs and plastic cups in regular size.
“Guess we need to stock up regular size cups, hyung.” Jaejoong reports and Nino jolts it down. After jolting it, Nino still doesn't look at Jaejoong's direction although he knows the younger one is waiting for him to say something about his earlier statement. A sigh escapes his lips and then closes his notebook.
"I can't say for sure but we can't do anything about it unless Eunhyuk wants us to do something." Nino answers and Jaejoong gives a nod. He is extremely worried but he doesn’t know how to comfort Eunhyuk. He has seen how Eunhyuk almost lost everything back then and now that Donghae is back, he doesn’t know how Eunhyuk will take it.
Five years ago have been down right to Eunhyuk. There have been cries and muteness. There have been empty smiles and longing gazes and even if Eunhyuk has been saying to them that he is fine, they have known what he truly feels. It’s only when he is dancing when they can see a life in his eyes by then. But now, they are thankful that a saying 'Only in time can a person heal' does exist because little by little, Eunhyuk's genuine smile has returned. It isn't the same but still it is better. But then what if the past catches up with time how will it go then?
Jaejoong is fiddling with necktie when Nino has spoken again.
“By the way, Ohno’s mother just called me. She said hi. She says we should have at least a vacation there this coming summer...” Nino brings out the news and Jaejoong grins at that.
He really likes Ohno’s mother. The first time he has met her is when he is in his sophomore year. Nino and Ohno have just graduated and it is summer vacation for them. So, the two have decided to bring them along with them as a celebration. She is really lovely and gentle and very accommodating. She even let him and Nino cook most of the time in their one month stay and even call them her sons.
Of course he has his mother, who is also a mother to eight older women. And so he feels a bit different with how Ohno's mother treats him unlike how his mother treats him. Of course, it isn't bad really. His mother is also lovely. Maybe just because he is in a house surrounded by nine women all the time, it's a whole different thing being in a house surrounded by only at least two women and mostly men. (Well Ohno has an older sister) And then it dawns to him, remembering Nino's situation back then which is quite similar to his actual situation.
“Nino hyung, have you ever met your parents?” Jaejoong asks and he knows he is crossing boundaries but he has been curious for so long he has known Nino.
When they have that vacation before, they have learned that Nino actually lives with the Ohno’s his entire life, a very similar scenario to him as he is living with the Kim’s.
“No...” Nino says and Jaejoong is left clueless as more questions pop up yet only one has managed to come out from his dry lips.
“How come?”
There is a pause as Nino’s eyes have met his. Jaejoong blinks, biting his lower lip at the process and he can feel himself being nervous again. Sure, he and Nino have gotten pretty close for they always work the best when it comes to composing and cooking. Also, their personalities don’t really differ much but Jaejoong can’t remove the uneasiness he feels whenever Nino looks at him like that.
It feels like Nino can see right through your soul with those eyes. He knows how Nino can be so observant, pointing things that is needed to be pointed, may it be little or big. But there is something when Nino looks to you in the eyes. Maybe it is just to him but then he has seen that same look Nino emits before, but that time it has been given to Eunhyuk when Donghae first has introduced Eunhyuk to the group. And base on Eunhyuk’s reaction, the latter is feeling the same as he is. Even so, Jaejoong doesn’t particularly hate that. It just that it feels there is something else in that feeling and he wants to know what is it.
“How about you Jaejoong..." Nino starts and with the calmness yet the hint of seriousness in Nino's tone, Jaejoong can't help but to gulp inwardly.
"Have you ever met your real parents?” Nino asks back and Jaejoong is a bit taken back. But then it isn’t really a secret about his origin.
Yes, he is adopted by the Kim's household.
To him, his childhood is blurry and only bits can be recalled (more like nothing can be really recalled, not even his childhood with all of his noona). All he can remember is the constant feeling of being with Yunho all the time. (And they aren't even living in the same roof. How come is it like that?)
When he has turned sixteen when he has started questioning his origin and Yunho steps up to patiently supplied him those details.
Yunho has narrated that both their parents have been friends with the Kim's. Since the children of the Kim's are all older than them (and all females he may add), they are most likely to be together since they are in the similar age. When his parents have died in an accident where he also got his amnesia and that’s when the Kim household has taken him in and Jaejoong doesn’t question more. Because it's always the same answer he'll get.
"You have a severe amnesia Jaejoong. That's why you don't remember.”
“I dunno… they showed me pictures but it never triggered a single emotion. They say I’m still suffering from amnesia but then…” Jaejoong’s words falter as he admits it. He is confused.
He has been living with his amnesia for like 12 years already. Isn’t it about time for him to recall a bit some? Like actual memories, even just the details of the accident. He has searched before as curiousness eats him up. They say if a person is suffering from amnesia, the first thing he remembers is either he remembers the day he has gotten to the accident or his fondest memories.
But why only the feeling of being with Yunho is the only thing he can remember? Of course he treasures that feeling. But then he can't visualize it. No remnants of scent, or sight, not even sounds. Is his amnesia that severe? Should he be in comatose if that is the case?
His head aches and that is the reason why he chooses not to question more. He learns a person cannot dwell in the past because there is the present and a future coming.
At the end of his trance, he notices that Nino is looking at him, but it seems his mind is in a distant. And he wonders if there is something wrong with what he has said.
“I haven't met them..." Nino repeats his answer in a more precise way and when Jaejoong is about to repeat his question about that, Nino beats him to it.
"...because I don't have."
It is straight and direct but it has left Jaejoong more confuse. What does Nino mean by that? And he somehow knows there's something more than that.
Chapter 1b | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3
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Author’s Notes:
Yahoo! Although I havefinished this chapter even before I have posted chapter 1, I am just able to upload this now since I haven’t finished chapter three and I really like to have at least one chapter advance in my hand. But I guess it is safe to release this because I somehow manage to write half of chapter three. I dunno why but I’m suddenly having a writer’s block with Yunjae. Well, maybe because Yunjae’s story is a bit complicated. Anyways, before I bore you with useless crap here, I better stop and just get it on with.
I am able to finish the outline, well almost actually and I think I’ll stick to that till I have already posted till chapter 15 or else my muse might suddenly leave me. Aside from that, everything is cool. I would also appreciate some comments and criticisms. Although I
just do this out of fun and personal entertainment, it also makes me happy if readers could share their thoughts with me. Thank you again for taking time in reading this.
Terms used in this chapter:
Hisashiburi - means Long time no see in Japanese.
Moshi Moshi - Usual first greeting if you’re answering phone calls like Hello in Japanese
Yeoboseyo - Usual first greeting if you’re answering phone calls like Hello in Korean
Myeolchi - means anchovy in Korean
Irishaimase - means welcome in Japanese. Usual greeting of staffs if customers enter establishments.
Kamsahamnida - means thank you in Korean, the formal way.
Niji - means rainbow in Japanese. Nino’s solo song for Arashi’s Dream A- Live album.
Bonus Facts: (Just for fun XD Please bear with me. Hahahaha~)
Have you ever wonder what if this story just involves one fandom, who’s going to play the main characters?
For Super Junior, I’ll still go for the original plan such as HaeHyuk, KyuMin (Cho Kyuhyun and Lee Sungmin) will take Yunjae’s roles but then I might change HanChul (Hangeng and Kim Heechul) rather than YeWook for Ohmiya’s roles.
For Arashi fandom, Ohmiya will still take their respective roles, Sakuraiba will take YunJae’s while JunMao (Matsumoto Jun and Inoue Mao) couple will take HaeHyuk’s, and that couple will probably the first het I’ll right in Arashi fandom. *grins*
For DBSK fandom, YunJae will take now Ohmiya’s roles, while Yoosu (Park Yoochun and Kim Junsu) will take HaeHyuk’s role and ChangKyu (Shim Changmin and Cho Kyuhyun) will take Yunjae’s roles.
That’s all, Have a nice day!!!
PS: Can someone explain to me how come this 6000+ word chapter can be posted in one post when a 5000+ word chapter needed to be posted in two posts? LJ, you are confusing me. Aigoo!