Blade of Gliese Chapter One: Riza of Antinome

[shanmonster]

Riza of Antinome slipped her foot behind that of the Lancastian soldier, pressed with her knee, then shoved the off-balance man hard into the wall. He sucked air in a noisy bray, the wind knocked right out of him. She laughed when she saw the next soldier rush toward her and easily tossed him over her shoulder and slammed him into the floor. She

Comments

[threemilechild]

I don't know how much of it was already there and how much is your rewrite, but you did a particularly good job with the action. It was clear and suggestive, but not tedious.

[shanmonster]

Thanks! I've rewritten everything. There are very, very few words in common.