First off, I think you missed something, the White Men are actually men in white space suits. I tried to make that clear with Ta'quixiol describing the faces of the Men as different colors. I purposely left out the color of the initial White Man's face to leave his race unknown. I guess that didn't come across in my writing. As for your suggestion of my fact checking (which I do when I have more time) I do believe that birds can gasp...I "bird-sat" my neighbors' parrot and that sucker made a LOT of noises that I didn't associate with birds until I met him. Originally I was going to use a bug-based alien species, but that would have limited exclaimations and I couldn't imagine humans trying to learn to speak an insectazoid language. Second, have you considered signing up as an editor? You have very good insight and understanding of sentance structure. We could always use that here. Being able to help writers is an excellent thing. Especially when it is asked for.
Well we all have our first impressions and first names for things. An example, pacifiers for infants in my family we call them "nooks" so whenever we see a cute baby with a pacifier the first thing my mother or I said is "How happy does this baby look with his/her nook" even though we know that the item is a pacifier, we still call it by the first name I (I am the eldest child so I got the honor of naming many things) chose. Ta'quixiol and his people saw a white spacesuit and called the huslter White Man, to identify color and...species. It's not saying that the aliens are any less civilized than the humans, it is saying that whoever the con man was, he didn't care enough to identify himself correctly. My idea was for his negligence to show how insensitive and rash he was. Couldn't you see him presenting all the adults and children of that village with their bondage. Perhaps taking them away to sell them to blackmarket alien freakshows or something equally horrible
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As for your suggestion of my fact checking (which I do when I have more time) I do believe that birds can gasp...I "bird-sat" my neighbors' parrot and that sucker made a LOT of noises that I didn't associate with birds until I met him. Originally I was going to use a bug-based alien species, but that would have limited exclaimations and I couldn't imagine humans trying to learn to speak an insectazoid language.
Second, have you considered signing up as an editor? You have very good insight and understanding of sentance structure. We could always use that here. Being able to help writers is an excellent thing. Especially when it is asked for.
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