( cut for semi-graphic descriptions of injuries )

A thousand gil to whoever can bring me pants.

[Cue Kefka glaring at the camera, skin back to normal, no wings at all, wearing a green sweater and looking like he just fell out of bed. Which he totally didn't. Shut up.]

That was anticlimactic.

[Blink. Then, Kefka remembers what bugs him and adds:]

So, does anyone want to tell me why all the keybladers have four faces in between them all?

[locked to non-Organization members, minus Ansem, plus Xion, Axel and Roxas]

[Kefka appears onscreen, his face a pale purple and his hair twisted into a long(er than usual) braid over his shoulder. He's wearing a sleeveless shirt with long gloves, which exposes a red chitinous armor covering his shoulders, and two small, white wings are barely ( Read more... )

[Ok. Kefka's communicator has managed to survive getting thwacked by a heartless and getting fallen on by a roof, but that doesn't mean it's not broken. And so when, in a flail, Kefka smacks it, it turns on ( Read more... )

Alright, ladies and gentlemen! It's time for a super-special clothing shop SALE! That's right! Come to the shop now for this special magical communicator offer ( Read more... )

[The first thing you should know is that Kefka's communicator-book is broken ( Read more... )

[The sound of static pervades the transmission before a voice starts to ramble through it. The voice is first a buzz, then a whisper, then staticky speech as Kefka talks to himself.]So then if it’s light, then it means that at their core, their true being, all things there are light. And if it’s dark, then the true being off all hearts is darkness ( Read more... )

( IN WHICH KEFKA BLOWS UP A BUILDING, JUMPS INTO THE AFTERLIFE AND SINGS )

[Kefka adjusts the video so that he can glare it in the eye, his honeyed hair falling over his face and shoulders in long, messy tresses.]Alright, since no one seems to know what they're doing, especially the Gaians, and I never want to explain what a penis is again, this is the open post on HUMAN. BIOLOGY. Sex, bodies in general, whatever! Ask it ( Read more... )