Mermaid Sex

Feb 20, 2010 23:08

 So, it's pretty clear that babysitting is a vastly traumatizing experience.  I've started to... enjoy playing Barbies.  But I have the one I like, who is called Devin, and a plumber, with mad awesome cowboy boots and socks.  And that was way too much information.

Note to self: six year olds should not be allowed to watch Lady Gaga videos.

But today!  Oh, Today!  We watched the Barbie movie Mermadia.

First of all, the etymology of the word mermadia, is so puzzling to me that it makes me want to cry.  I mean, fine, Mermaid plus the greek-type 'ia' ending like in Alexandria, but still.  Why does that sound like some sort of weird disease?  A fungal infection?

Anyways, the real point is that Elina and Nori had clearly massive subtext potential.  Let's build friendship, teamwork and trust!  yay!  And then Elina gets a tail (she was a fairy before), and Nori looks at her and is like "OMG, you're so-"  and Elina cuts her off before she can say "f*ing hot" with a tail, which is vastly disappointing.  And (this is probably a Spoiler Warning, but seriously, Mermadia) there is about a thirty second period where Elina realizes that she will have to stay as a mermaid forever and never regain her wings!  She despairs.  And it was the perfect opportunity for Nori to jump in and say, "I know it sucks, but I'm going to show you all the good things that come with a tail," wink, nudge...

And then I hit a roadblock, because there is a very big problem with mermaid sex.
How does it work?  If they're just fish on that half, with that sort of system, then it can't have anything to do with reproduction, but if they're mammals?  Has anyone read some good, scientifically plausible mermaid pr0n?

Is this a really stupid question?

This is why I hardly ever write personal posts.  I am *so* weird.  *bangs head on wall*
But all in all, Mermadia was not that bad a movie.  Hilariously awful at times, and illogical and pointless, but it had its moments. 

recommendations, fanfiction

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