[Fic:] Cementry guest

[mouter]

Jin woke up in the middle of the night. He was painfully shaking and he felt horrible. The nightmare came once again and he couldn’t do anything to get rid of it. Night after night he was dreaming about his boyfriend’s death. He rubbed his tired eyes and he got up from the bed. He knew, he wouldn’t be able to sleep again, so he decided to go for a

Comments

[norilys]

First of all I wanted to comment on the drabble, because it was really really sad ;___; Poor Jin being unable to be with his boyfriend...!!

But the end I like Pi being there, even if for a moment I also thought it was Kazuya's ghost *ges bricked* But I liked that Pi made Jin realized that he had to live and be happy for Kazuya to be happy in his after-life as well...

Thanks for sharing, Baby Boy!!! Woah, I miss you so much!!!! How are you doing!? *hugs*

♥

Anyway, I'm not the most appropiate person to beta anybody's work, but somehow I wanted to help... I striked the words that I felt were kinda off and put next to them what I felt you sould write instead. At times there just some words that needed to be deleted. Also, I underlined some words that I think you should add... I don't know if I'm really helping here or making it worse, let's hope for a real beta to come to help you, ne~~

[norilys]

Jin woke up in the middle of the night. He was painfully shaking and he felt horrible. The nightmare came once again and he couldn’t do anything to get rid fromof it. Night byafter night he was dreaming about his boyfriend’s death. He rubbed his tired eyes and he got up from the bed. He knew, he wouldn’t be able to sleep again, so he decided to go for a walk.

He took a deep breath and he closed his eyes and he started to walk down the street. The cold, fresh air was always calming him up. Bad memories faded away and the good ones came back to him. Then he opened his eyes and suddenly he stopped and he realized where he was.

Cementry. Cemetery. The graves wherewere surrounding him. It was surprising for him. He had no intention to get there. For a one second he stopped breathing. It was like a sign from the God. He hadn’t been there since his funeral. He couldn’t dotake another step. It was too painful for him. Being there in the middle of the night… For God sake! What the hell was he doing there?! He didn’t know and he supposed that

[mouter]

Thank you very much! *hugs* I'm glad you like it and I'm so thankful for that mistakes... thank you!

I'm doing...okay I think, but not so great. I'm after an operation and still have problems with my brain tumour. But we are working on it and I hope I can defeated it. I'm trying be optymistic :)

And I'm studying right now. English and I think I know less English than I knew before :(

Love you!!!

[norilys]

It was short, but full of many feelings, Baby Boy!! Though I don't like angst that much, I can appreciate things written with so much emotion!! ♥

And well, I'm not very sure if I helped you in anyway, but I tried!! ^___^

Well, that's the spirit!!!! No matter what gets on your way, I kow you will be able to defeat this monster called brain tumor! Is your recovering going fine?

Oh, I read about it!! I'm so proud of you, sweetie!! But yeah, sometimes school makes us feel like that xDD But if you keep on studying with dedication, I'm sure you'll get better at it. In fact, I saw a lot of improvemente already with this piece. Somehow it felt as it the story flowed more smoothly. So just ganbatte, ne~~

Love you too!!! *hugs* ♥