His constant tossing and turning was keeping Nancy awake too. She knew what had happened. The look on John's face after combined with his even more distant than usual attitude told her everything she needed to know. Besides, it wasn't like the other wives hadn't filled in the rest the next morning over coffee. Nancy figured she could wait him out, but the whole situation with John possibly dying every mission was getting to be too much for her to cope with. While scars accumulated and stitches faded, the fear of being a 26-year-old widow stayed with her. "I'm glad it wasn't you," she whispered into the darkness between them, wiping at her eyes to prevent the formation of tears that would threaten to drag leftover mascara down her cheeks.
Irrationally annoyed to hear those words come out of her mouth, John could hardly find the ability to reply, rolling over in surprise that she would ever say that to him. He shook his head slowly and squeezed his eyes shut. Maybe he could will himself to sleep to avoid talking about this. "Don't." John would swear that just slipped out.
Nancy frowned, taken aback and wanting to know exactly when she was getting her husband back from the depths of this utterly depressing silence that had descended on him since returning from his last mission.
And really, if she was honest, he'd been acting a little oddly since that weird day trip to Fandom six months ago. Okay, more oddly. The man was strange in general. "What? I can't be happy you came home when other women lost their husbands?"
He felt her hand stroking over his shoulder and couldn't help flinching away. "No," he mumbled under his breath. Explaining more thoroughly would be hard the way his jaw was clenching against the memories he couldn't seem to escape. John would give anything to have somehow saved his teammates from their fate, even his own life. Not that Nancy understood that. But how could she? He wished for a moment that she was someone who could get it and immediately felt horribly guilty.
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And really, if she was honest, he'd been acting a little oddly since that weird day trip to Fandom six months ago. Okay, more oddly. The man was strange in general. "What? I can't be happy you came home when other women lost their husbands?"
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Make that guiltier.
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