fic: "One Small Step" (Tintin/Haddock, teen)

Nov 17, 2011 12:18

This, believe it or not, is a ficlet project story. The last ficlet requestor, brewsternorth, pooled hir request with ansketil_rose and
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fic: 2011, fic: tintin, ficlet project

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Comments 46

miss_morland November 18 2011, 21:11:15 UTC
Oh, I love this. So much. (Brace yourself for long review of doom...)

In the first part, I love how quickly and deftly the central motives are established: not only Haddock's taking care of Tintin (and btw, the "You save me and I save you" line was absolutely beautiful and very descriptive of their relationship both in this story and in general), but also the dramatic irony that comes from seeing Haddock's discomfort. It's so obvious to the reader that he loves Tintin and is afraid of being too close to him at the same time, and that irony just grows even stronger and more powerful in the subsequent sections, first in the back rub scene, then after Haddock's spacewalk, and then - perhaps most poignantly at all - after the ice cave, when Haddock's visibly trying to convince himself of thinking of Tintin as a kid.

Tintin shivers again at the vastness of everything he's been given. Moulinsart and the moon, and a friend better than any of the stainless heroes Tintin dreamed up during his solitary childhood.I just love the juxtaposition ( ... )

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miss_morland November 18 2011, 21:18:36 UTC
Also! Haddock's backstory here is wonderful - it's no wonder he'd be inclined to domesticity after what must essentially have been a lonely and rootless youth. I like that Moulinsart becomes such a symbol of safety for Tintin, too.

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kindkit November 19 2011, 04:47:30 UTC
I love long reviews (seriously, the word "love" should be in giant sparkly text), so please don't apologize for that. (ETA: And I seem to be writing the Long Response of Doom, so we've even.)

the "You save me and I save you" line was absolutely beautiful

That was one of my favorite lines.

The scene where Tintin thinks about masturbation works really well in bridging the gap between his youthful innocence and the insight he gainsAh, thank you. One of the hardest things about writing this story was trying to figure out how Tintin's sexuality might work and might be convincingly portrayed. Trying to move him the distance from an basically asexual state, where he has a sexual drive but has never connected it to anything he feels for another person, into desiring a sexual relationship was tricky, especially since I didn't want to suggest that he was actually asexual and get into a creepy "asexual is CURED BY LOVE" trope. I tried to suggest a multitude of things going on: a repressive background, the influence of heteronormativity in ( ... )

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slashgirl80 November 18 2011, 22:36:53 UTC
O__O *__*

How wonderful! So sweet *sighs*

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kindkit November 19 2011, 04:48:49 UTC
Thank you!

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supercrook November 19 2011, 06:00:46 UTC
This is just breathtakingly good. I kept checking to make sure I had more to read, even when I'd reached the end of it. There's too much amazing stuff for one comment, and way too many amazing parts to pick out just one, but this paragraph, God--

Immediately Tintin feels a fool. It's the sort of thing salesclerks say to ladies--old ladies--to get them to buy perfume. But he means it. The captain isn't old. People, Tintin thinks, have an age they were meant to be, an age that suits them. The captain was meant to be as he is now, solid, well-defined, comfortable in his own small eccentricities. Sometimes Tintin worries that he himself was meant to be a boy and that he's almost at the end of it, that he'll be a decaying boy from now on, the wreckage of a boy, and not a man.

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kindkit November 19 2011, 20:12:32 UTC
Thank you so much. That paragraph is probably my single favorite moment in the story, and I'm delighted that it was one of yours too.

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retha_helena November 19 2011, 07:33:23 UTC
You know, I've been waiting for this. And I'm not disappointed, believe me :)

I really love this part:

Tintin's never wanted one. He pretended when he was younger, so that other boys wouldn't think he was odd and the monks wouldn't think he might have a vocation. He's looked at girls and tried to want them, itemizing the things men talk about (their round breasts, their legs in silk stockings, their plump red lips and long shiny hair, the smell of their perfumes) but feeling nothing. True, he needs release sometimes--his body's the same as any other man's, even if his mind isn't--but it's a separate thing. He can't imagine kissing a girl, let alone doing that to her. It doesn't worry him the way it used to; it's a kind of freedom. He'll never have to give up adventure for the sake of a wife and children. He needs nothing but his own hand.

It seems like he's denying things and finally shut his feelings out. Thank you for writing this!

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kindkit November 19 2011, 20:15:38 UTC
Thank you!

I don't think Tintin's in denial about any feelings for women--I was definitely envisioning him as gay in this story. But at that point, due in part to the culture of the times, he's not able to make the leap from "I'm not attracted to women" to "maybe I'm attracted to men," and can't even recognize attraction when he feels it. So, yes, he's constructed a mental image of himself as someone without certain kinds of feelings and without a need for emotional connection. Of course he's quite, quite wrong. *grins*

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ramen_rules November 19 2011, 10:06:08 UTC
Wow. Just, wow. I am blown away by how descriptive and introspective this piece is. You are an incredible writer! Please pardon my lack of actual review, as I am still in awe of what I just read...

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kindkit November 19 2011, 20:15:59 UTC
Thank you so much!

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