Dear Diary~ [Page 55 - Jaejoong]
Title: Dear Diary~
Author: k_chan!
Disclaimer: ....Yep....it's disclaimed...xD
Parts: [55/??] I mean...there's not much plot so I'll probably just go with it. xDD
Pairings: So far Yoosu...Yunjae...Jaemin...Jaesu...Jaechun...Jaechul...xDDD
Genre: crack....with a tiny smidgeon of angst in the middle. o.o *runs*
Rating: PG/PG-13
Summary: A collection of journal entries from the boys of DBSK. Let's get inside their heads. ^.~
A/N: Yeah, it's been a while. o.o HI READERS!!! 8D *waves*
A/N2: ...Readers....? O.O
A/N3: Um...are you too mad at me for updating so late to join meh community...? o.o
A/N4: It's dbkrackweens ... ._. There's a contest now...
A/N5: I promise I'll be better in the future...I'll destroy all the writer's block demons.......
A/N6: ....Readers...........?
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Dear Diary,
I'm kinda pissed/upset/disappointed/yay/not yay/refreshed/exhausted/confused/sad that I'm not too sore to write in full sentences right now, so have a few lists, Diary. You're welcome.
My Awesome List of Things that are Awesome:
-This list
-You, Diary. (You're welcome)
-Me
-Yunho
-Me
-Food
-Changmin eating my food
-Rock music
-Ballads
-All music
-X-Man
-People who use the word 'befuddled' in conversation
-Hands
-Feet
-Turtles
-My new April socks
-Lube (Can't keep teasing myself like this til Mission Min is complete)
-Wasabi
-HOT curry
-Yellow tail fish
-One Piece
-Peeing (Oh, come on. You can't say it's not one of the most relaxing, calming, soothing, amazing things on this earth. You just can't.)
-Speaking English better than Yoochun (I can't, but you know, it would be awesome enough for the List of Awesome if I could)
-Mario Bros. (Yoshi!)
-Yoshi (He gets his own category now)
-Taking long walks around the block with Yunho
-Watching Yunho and Junsu take long walks around the block. (Because it always turns into a mad sprint of who's manliness can trump all manliness)
-Bags (There are all kinds. And so many colors. Fun, fun~)
-Sex (Should go higher up on the list but I don't know if it's legal to write that anymore according to the new Law...)
-Being co-head chef at the restaurant with Ryeowook
-Being co-head chef at the restaurant when Ryeowook calls in sick
-Nursing Changmin back to health when he's sick (He's so CUTE. I wish he were sick all the time. I mean....wait...I don't mean that as evil as that sounded...)
-Shopping with Yoochun
-Watching Yoochun sleep
-Watching Yoochun's Adam's apple
-stars~
-ice cream
-High places
-Cats
-Mirrors
-Reflective surfaces
-That Japanese group that sings the song Hands (That song is so wrong, it's right. Yeah!)
-Jung Yunho
How to Get Changmin a Man:
-Get him a haircut
-Trick him to get a haircut when he refuses the first time
-Beware of evil glare when Operation: Cut the Min's Hair in His Sleep doesn't work out so well. (He's too smart. Darn it.)
-Accept the fact that his hair does not need cutting
-But consider getting him to consider that his hair may need a little coloring (Highlights can do wonders~)
-Never look for romance through Heechul. He's a disaster.
-Contemplate the idea that he might be straight/experimental/bi. Never mind. Changmin's definitely bi. Just updated his Cyworld status. I'll just shove men in his face either way
-Capture his diary (This is more difficult than it sounds)
-Stalk him until I can use the data I gather to gage what his favorite traits are in a man
-Let him hang out around Yoochun (Maybe he'll learn how to flirt and get his own man)
-Tell him I'm taking him to eat out
-Take him to a stripper bar on gay night instead
-Brace self for copious snark thereafter
-Go man-shopping at the mall
-Point out lots of hot males at the mall and force the Min to chat up 1 out of ever 2 guys spotted
-Set him up an account at match.com
-Get him drunk
-Get him willingly molested by sober and/or equally drunk male of my choosing
-Brace self for copious snark following sobriety
-Take him to a nude beach
-Hope there are not topless old ladies there
-As a precaution for his well-being, keep Junsu out of the above possible strategy
-Ask Kibum #2 (That kid nicknamed Key from downstairs) if he has any older friends
-Ask Kibum #1 (The one that lives with Heechul and Hankyung) to donate alcoholic beverages for the above strategy that involved alcoholic beverages.
-Ask Kibum #3 (The one that...Do I know a 3rd Kibum?) if such a Kibum exists, ask him to hypnotize Changmin
-Play Yoochun's Sims 3 game for observation notes. Sim Min may provide some answers for the sexless predicament plaguing our house
-Get Changmin a dog
-Plant Changmin and dog in a park.
-Watch the beautiful men introduce themselves to Changmin and his adorably impossible to ignore doggy
-Take away Changmin's porn
-Give Changmin more porn
-Give Changmin lesbian porn (No. That will scare him)
-Take Changmin on a cruise
-Let the homosexual promiscuity ensue
-Convince random horny cruise passenger and/or horny island native to come home with Changmin
-Burn the new Law
TV shows that rock:
-X-Man
-Love Letter
-X-Man
-You're Beautiful
-Kim Sam Soon
-Coffee Prince
-Take Care of the Young Lady
-Heading to the Ground (Don't tell Yunho, Diary, but I think the lead is...quite attractive)
-Iris (Dude, who is that assassin guy that keeps showing up? He's hardcore~)
-Family Outing
Movies that rock:
-Attack on the Pin-up Boys
-Oldboy (Twisted but fun)
-Too Beautiful to Lie
-200 Pounds Beauty
-Heaven's Postman (Haven't seen it yet but I'm sure it rocks.)
-Hello, Schoolgirl
-Speedy Scandal
-Finding Nemo
Music that rocks:
-Everything~
Books that rock:
-One Piece
-Absolute Boyfriend
Reasons why Jung Jihoon-sshi annoys me sometimes:
-On Yunho's Thursday practices, he spends more time with my Yunho than I do. At least it feels like it
-He still hasn't done anything about the rats. I know they're still there
-He gave us an apartment with a demon laundry room
-He stole Yunho's last name.
-There is no relation
-I don't know why he keeps telling people that there is
-Jung Jihoon and Jung Yunho are not brothers
-Or 1st cousins
-Or 324th cousins
-Or of the same species
-They're not
-The first time he met Yoochun, he smacked him on the butt
-Weird??
-The first time he met Junsu, he didn't smack him on the butt
-Weird???
Reasons why I must shop for Junsu:
-He can't shop for himself
-He has no sense of fashion
-All his pants are now burning in laundry hell or something
-I get to shop with Yoochun, too
-It's fun to shop with Yoochun
-Yoochun has fashion sense
-I'm wearing his shoes
-I can't let Yoochun shop for Junsu alone
-He'll come back empty handed saying Junsu should just go without clothes all together
-That would violate Yunho's new Law
-We'd all have to face punishment from Yunho if even one of us breaks the Law
-I don't think Yunho's legal punishment is the same as his special punishments for me
-Yunho has to make new punishments for me now that our original one is outlawed
-My punishment is awful
-Yunho tells me stupid jokes in private
-Like yesterday he pointed at a nonexistent spot on my shirt and said, "You've got Yunho juice on your shirt."
-And then he flicks my nose
-And then he walks away laughing
-I suppose this new punishment really is a traditional 'punishment' now
-I miss my old punishments
-Junsu can't shop
-He gets distracted by random things when he shops without supervision
-Like the time he started looking for mattresses when he was supposed to be finding Changmin a shirt for a birthday present
-Junsu is lame
-Junsu is lame because he hates shopping
-Shopping is fun
-Junsu is lame
-Shopping = fun
-Junsu = lame
-Shopping + Yoochun = fun
-Kim + Junsu = lame
Body parts I find interesting:
-Navels
-That muscle in your lower back
-Hands (Pretty, slender ones like Yunho's)
-Feet (It's not a kinky fetish or anything. Really...)
-Forehead (Yoochun's is huge but that's not why I think foreheads are interesting)
-I could put a sexual body part here but I don't think it's necessary or legal. Yunho takes care of everything or at least he used to so it's all okay
-Cheeks (The ones on your face. Pervert Diary...)
-Thumbs (They're opposable!)
-Eyes (The windows into Yunho's soul~)
-Tongues
~Agent JJ
Turn the page~ Page 54 - Changmin || Page 56 - Yoochun
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Comments go here~
And fun!cookies go to whoever can identify the artist of the song Jaejoong randomly sticks on his Awesome List of Things that are Awesome~
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