Doctor Knows Best
Title: Doctor Knows Best
Author: ivesia19
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Ryden
POV: 3rd limited
Summary: Ryan has severe insomnia and goes with Brendon to Dr. House to find a solution. While helping Ryan, House can’t help but notice something interesting about his patient.
Disclaimer: I don’t own House. This is entirely fictional. Blah blah blah - you know the drill.
Author Notes: Just a little plot bunny that has been creeping around my head lately. Couldn’t help it.
Dr. Gregory House was in an unusually good mood today. He successfully tricked Wilson into taking his motorcycle for its six-month inspection, his favorite soap opera was getting more dramatic by the episode, and Cuddy was wearing a particularly low shirt this morning.
House couldn’t help but smile to himself as he popped a Vicodin expertly into his mouth. Now all he needed to do was pawn his clinic hours off on one of the more easily manipulated doctors, an easy enough task. Perhaps then he would twirl his cane, or track Foreman down and trip him in front of a patient.
While these deliciously deviant thoughts were running through his head, Dr. Cuddy had somehow managed to sneak up behind him. “House!” she barked in his ear.
House startled and gave her an annoyed look. “Hasn’t anyone ever told you that women are preferred to be seen and not heard?” He leeringly stared her up and down, taking in her questionably low neckline. “You don’t seem to have a problem being seen obviously.”
Cuddy was unamused, “Very funny, House.” Though her voice was steady and she seemed unperturbed, Cuddy discreetly tried to tug her plunging neckline up to a more work-friendly placement. House smirked at her cover-up.
“You’re needed in the clinic. If I’m not mistaken, you still have three hours left this week and it’s already Friday. And don’t try to get one of your lackeys to cover for you.” Cuddy smiled sweetly. “And if you don’t finish them they’ll carry over to next week.”
Cuddy turned sharply on her heels, walking away. House rolled his eyes at the back of her head. “And they’ll double!” Cuddy shouted over her shoulder.
Damn.
House grumbled, apparently it was time to see the great unwashed, the mass populace. Oh joy.
As he walked down into the clinic area, he could see that a large mass of people were already waiting. It was going to be a long day. “Anyone who has a runny nose, sore throat, or slight headache listen up!”
Nearly every head turned to look at the misanthropic doctor. “Listening? Good. Go to a CVS and pick up some DayQuil. NyQuil if you’re feeling crazy. You have a cold. It’s winter. It happens.”
Before the indignant grumblings could happen, House opened the door to an examining room and let it slam behind him.
Morons.
A couple of minutes passed in blissful silence. Sure enough, just when House began to relax, the door opened and his first patient entered.
“Contestant number one, come on down!” House cupped his hands in front of his mouth, pantomiming a megaphone. The middle aged man that entered into the examining room looked around wildly. House smiled sardonically at his confusion. Sometimes it was too easy.
“Come on, sit down. We don’t have all day.” House pointed to the examining table with his cane. When the man didn’t move, House tapped him sharply with his cane. “Now.”
The man hurriedly jumped onto the table. “Perfect, now what seems to be the problem?”
“Um, I think I have Genital Warts,” the man embarrassingly confessed.
“That’s no way to get into my pants,” House retorted. The man blanched. “Well, let’s see it then, drop the jeans.”
His face growing steadily redder, the man pulled his jeans and boxers down past his knees.
Yep, the tiny sores were there. No mistaking them. “Congratulations, you have Genital Warts!”
At this proclamation, the examining room door suddenly opened. The man quickly pulled his boxers up to cover himself.
“Oh, I’m so sorry,” Dr. Cuddy choked out upon seeing the man. “House, I’m going to be sending in a patient in about five minutes.”
House raised his eyebrows up at her. “That’s great. Thank you for informing me that patients will come to see me. The doctor.” His voice was dripping with sarcasm.
Cuddy pursed her lips. “It’s a special case. A sensitive patient if you will.”
“What about me?” The STD-ridden man interjected.
House pulled out his prescription pad and scribbled. “Take this. Aldara. It’s your friend.”
The man hastily took the prescription and left the room, muttering a swift “Thanks” as he departed.
“Nice man,” House said. “It’s always good to have a little reminder that my penis is superior.”
Cuddy frowned. “Just be nice, whatever you do.”
“I always am!” House yelled after her, flinching slightly as the door slammed behind her.
True to her word, a couple of minutes later, Cuddy led two young men into the examining room. Both were rather skinny, though the taller one had an almost dancer-esque quality to him while the shorter was a bit curvier. They were standing very close together, and the fast movement of their arms made House suspect that they had been holding hands earlier. They had their heads leaned in close to each other, smiling discreetly at one another as if sharing a secret.
The taller boy wore fitted gray pinstriped pants, a white oxford and a vest. The other was outfitted in tight black jeans and a tight blue shirt. Both were wearing eyeliner. House couldn’t help but crease his brow at their attire.
Cuddy interrupted House’s initial appraisal of the two men with her introductions. “Ryan, Brendon, this is Dr. House. House, this is Ryan Ross and Brendon Urie. The boys are in the area doing some publicity.”
House scanned quickly through his brain, trying to see if he knew them. Nope, didn’t ring a bell. “That’s nice.”
Neither Brendon nor Ryan seemed particularly bothered that House didn’t know who they were. Interesting. House knew that they were obviously somewhat important, hence the chaperoning.
The taller boy, the one that Cuddy identified as Ryan walked past House and gracefully climbed up onto the table. Brendon stuck his hand out. “Nice to meet you. I appreciate you helping us out.”
House stared at the hand and then turned to Ryan. “What’s your ailment?”
Cuddy sighed at House’s slight. “Be nice, House,” she said as she left the room. House waved her off.
Out of the corner of his eye, House could see Brendon sitting down in the empty chair by the door. Ryan shrugged at Brendon and gave him a wry smile.
House focused in on Ryan. He was delicate looking and almost feminine. Boy-pretty, House asserted to himself.
“I’ve been having trouble sleeping. Insomnia.” Ryan’s voice was deeper than House would have imagined. It was smooth and fluid, though it held little inflection.
“Maybe the tight pants you wear are cutting off your circulation,” House quipped. Ryan said nothing. His eyes displayed nothing.
If there was one thing that House loved more than anything else it was solving a mystery. He liked to understand people, discover their secrets. There was definitely something about this Ryan Ross that was intriguing.
“So, you say you can’t sleep.” Ryan nodded. “When did this start?”
Ryan paused, clearly thinking back in his head.
“About three weeks ago,” Brendon’s voice rang out.
House turned and faced the boy. “What are you, his boyfriend?” House took in the younger boy’s full lips and fuller hips. Oh, he was definitely the bottom.
“Band mate,” Brendon replied rather meekly. Ryan smiled reassuringly at Brendon.
Musicians. Great. Though House supposed that certainly explained the eyeliner. Somewhat. House observed the interaction between the two boys. Ryan’s eyes rarely left Brendon, though once and a while he would jerk, as if catching himself doing something wrong.
“Sure, band mates,” House scoffed. “If there’s one thing I’ve learned in my many years in medicine it’s that everyone lies. Especially musicians.”
The boys said nothing.
“So, three weeks. Why can’t you sleep?” Ryan shrugged. He wasn’t being much help.
“Okay then.” House moved across the room to grab a stethoscope. “I’m going to listen to your heartbeat for any irregularities. Just in case.” As he reached towards Ryan to use the instrument the boy flinched.
“Relax; I’m not going to beat you like your father.”
From behind him, House could hear Brendon make an angry noise. For his part, Ryan looked down. “Hm, guess I got that one right.”
“Can we just focus on the insomnia,” Brendon asked, his voice developing an angry edge.
“What are you doing here anyways?” House turned sharply and stared at the boy whose leg was bouncing wildly, though his face was a mask of control.
“I asked him to come,” Ryan said with a sharp edge.
“Why?”
“I wanted him here,” Ryan said still a little angry but blushing. “He’s my best friend.”
House observed the two of them carefully. He couldn’t figure them out. Definitely more research was required.
House directed his attention towards Ryan. “Often times, insomnia is caused by anxiety, stress, or racing thoughts. Have you experienced any of that recently?”
Once again Ryan remained silent and Brendon answered for him. “Well, we’re working on our second record right now. We threw out the whole first batch of lyrics so we’re basically back to step one.”
“Anything else?” House was staring intently at Ryan.
“I just broke up with my girlfriend,” Ryan mumbled.
“Why?” House asked. Ryan didn’t respond. House leaned in close to Ryan’s ear, whispering quietly so only he could hear. “Did she find out that you’re gay?” Ryan flushed red and jerked away from House.
“That’s none of your business,” Ryan said just as quietly. House smirked.
“What?! You and Keltie are over?!” Compared to the quiet murmur of Ryan’s previous words, Brendon’s exclamation amplified in Houses ear.
“Keep it down, will ya?” House flinched.
Brendon threw himself out of his chair and rushed towards Ryan. House smartly backed out of the way. “Why didn’t you tell me that you and Keltie broke up?”
Ryan shrugged.
“I could have helped you. Now it’s manifesting itself in insomnia. I told you, Ryan, you can’t go repressing your emotions.” Brendon frowned, his lips growing fuller at the pull. He gently traced his hand down Ryan’s cheek and House could see how the older boy leaned into the touch. Interesting indeed. “And don’t give me crap about your therapeutic writings because it’s obviously not working.”
“I agree,” House interjected. “You need to get everything out in the open. The only reason you can’t sleep is because you’re having repression issues and anxiety about your feelings.”
Brendon turned his head to stare at House, his mouth was slightly parted, obviously amazed. “What I said was right?”
“In idiots terms, yes.” The small smile that graced Brendon’s face upon hearing of his success quickly dropped at the sting of House’s insult.
“Don’t listen to that ass, Bren,” Ryan whispered, his mouth close to Brendon’s ear. House could see the younger boy shiver at the contact.
“This ass is going to help you with your problem, little emo boy.” For the first time all day, Ryan actually looked offended. “I’m sorry,” House rectified upon seeing Ryan’s face, “I meant little emo man. Obviously.”
House clapped his hands together loudly, causing Ryan to jump slightly against Brendon, falling against his chest. “Now, let’s get those deep dark thoughts exposed!”
Ryan glared up at House. “I’d rather not. It’s personal.”
“Fine,” House said. “I hope that you enjoy your many sleepless nights. Don’t forget to buy some heavy concealor next time you are browsing at the M.A.C. store.”
Brendon huffed. “Come on, Ryan. If this will let you get to sleep it’s worth a try. Dr. House probably doesn’t care what you have to say, and I’m your best friend.”
Still Ryan remained silent.
“Don’t you trust me?” Brendon’s voice wavered, revealing his hurt and insecurity. He pulled away from Ryan a little and House could see a frown start to form on Ryan’s lips.
“Of course I do, Brendon.”
“Then why won’t you tell me?”
Dr. House looked between the two boys. Ryan’s eyes were filled with inner turmoil, irritation, and just a tiny hint of something else. When Ryan still didn’t say anything House decided to intervene.
“Okay, I gave you your chance Ryan. I’ll say it.” House waited a beat, building up the anticipation. “Brendon, Ryan’s in love with you.”
Both boys turned and stared at the doctor. Ryan didn’t say anything. No confirmations or angry rejections were uttered. Brendon’s eyes grew larger as the silence expanded.
“I’m right, aren’t I?” House smugly asked. The expression on their faces was proof enough for him.
“What?” Brendon finally asked.
“Ryan’s in love with you and you’re in love with him.” Nothing. House sighed and continued. “I’ve known you two for about,” House peered down at his watch, “fifteen minutes, and I can tell that you want to bang each other. How could you miss something that obvious?”
Brendon looked over at Ryan. House could see that he had a hopeful expression on his face. “Is it me?” he asked. “Am I the reason that you can’t sleep?”
Ryan sighed, defeated. He raised his head, no longer hiding behind the sweep of his hair. “You’re the reason for everything.” Ryan’s voice had a hint of hesitation and fear in it. It was almost as if he were afraid that Brendon would freak out on him.
Brendon smiled big. He brought his hands up and grasped Ryan’s within his own. “You’re such a nerd.” Brendon leaned forward. He gently brought his hands up to graze the side of Ryan’s face and moved in, his lips aching to touch Ryan’s.
“Stop!” House yelled, breaking Brendon and Ryan out of their trance. “I can’t allow any PDA in here. Well, at least not without a fee. Or if you let me go get a video camera I’m sure that some crazy teenage girls would pay to see this.”
Ryan flicked House off and kissed Brendon.
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Author: ivesia19
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Ryden
POV: 3rd limited
Summary: Ryan has severe insomnia and goes with Brendon to Dr. House to find a solution. While helping Ryan, House can’t help but notice something interesting about his patient.
Disclaimer: I don’t own House. This is entirely fictional. Blah blah blah - you know the drill.
Author Notes: Just a little plot bunny that has been creeping around my head lately. Couldn’t help it.
Dr. Gregory House was in an unusually good mood today. He successfully tricked Wilson into taking his motorcycle for its six-month inspection, his favorite soap opera was getting more dramatic by the episode, and Cuddy was wearing a particularly low shirt this morning.
House couldn’t help but smile to himself as he popped a Vicodin expertly into his mouth. Now all he needed to do was pawn his clinic hours off on one of the more easily manipulated doctors, an easy enough task. Perhaps then he would twirl his cane, or track Foreman down and trip him in front of a patient.
While these deliciously deviant thoughts were running through his head, Dr. Cuddy had somehow managed to sneak up behind him. “House!” she barked in his ear.
House startled and gave her an annoyed look. “Hasn’t anyone ever told you that women are preferred to be seen and not heard?” He leeringly stared her up and down, taking in her questionably low neckline. “You don’t seem to have a problem being seen obviously.”
Cuddy was unamused, “Very funny, House.” Though her voice was steady and she seemed unperturbed, Cuddy discreetly tried to tug her plunging neckline up to a more work-friendly placement. House smirked at her cover-up.
“You’re needed in the clinic. If I’m not mistaken, you still have three hours left this week and it’s already Friday. And don’t try to get one of your lackeys to cover for you.” Cuddy smiled sweetly. “And if you don’t finish them they’ll carry over to next week.”
Cuddy turned sharply on her heels, walking away. House rolled his eyes at the back of her head. “And they’ll double!” Cuddy shouted over her shoulder.
Damn.
House grumbled, apparently it was time to see the great unwashed, the mass populace. Oh joy.
As he walked down into the clinic area, he could see that a large mass of people were already waiting. It was going to be a long day. “Anyone who has a runny nose, sore throat, or slight headache listen up!”
Nearly every head turned to look at the misanthropic doctor. “Listening? Good. Go to a CVS and pick up some DayQuil. NyQuil if you’re feeling crazy. You have a cold. It’s winter. It happens.”
Before the indignant grumblings could happen, House opened the door to an examining room and let it slam behind him.
Morons.
A couple of minutes passed in blissful silence. Sure enough, just when House began to relax, the door opened and his first patient entered.
“Contestant number one, come on down!” House cupped his hands in front of his mouth, pantomiming a megaphone. The middle aged man that entered into the examining room looked around wildly. House smiled sardonically at his confusion. Sometimes it was too easy.
“Come on, sit down. We don’t have all day.” House pointed to the examining table with his cane. When the man didn’t move, House tapped him sharply with his cane. “Now.”
The man hurriedly jumped onto the table. “Perfect, now what seems to be the problem?”
“Um, I think I have Genital Warts,” the man embarrassingly confessed.
“That’s no way to get into my pants,” House retorted. The man blanched. “Well, let’s see it then, drop the jeans.”
His face growing steadily redder, the man pulled his jeans and boxers down past his knees.
Yep, the tiny sores were there. No mistaking them. “Congratulations, you have Genital Warts!”
At this proclamation, the examining room door suddenly opened. The man quickly pulled his boxers up to cover himself.
“Oh, I’m so sorry,” Dr. Cuddy choked out upon seeing the man. “House, I’m going to be sending in a patient in about five minutes.”
House raised his eyebrows up at her. “That’s great. Thank you for informing me that patients will come to see me. The doctor.” His voice was dripping with sarcasm.
Cuddy pursed her lips. “It’s a special case. A sensitive patient if you will.”
“What about me?” The STD-ridden man interjected.
House pulled out his prescription pad and scribbled. “Take this. Aldara. It’s your friend.”
The man hastily took the prescription and left the room, muttering a swift “Thanks” as he departed.
“Nice man,” House said. “It’s always good to have a little reminder that my penis is superior.”
Cuddy frowned. “Just be nice, whatever you do.”
“I always am!” House yelled after her, flinching slightly as the door slammed behind her.
True to her word, a couple of minutes later, Cuddy led two young men into the examining room. Both were rather skinny, though the taller one had an almost dancer-esque quality to him while the shorter was a bit curvier. They were standing very close together, and the fast movement of their arms made House suspect that they had been holding hands earlier. They had their heads leaned in close to each other, smiling discreetly at one another as if sharing a secret.
The taller boy wore fitted gray pinstriped pants, a white oxford and a vest. The other was outfitted in tight black jeans and a tight blue shirt. Both were wearing eyeliner. House couldn’t help but crease his brow at their attire.
Cuddy interrupted House’s initial appraisal of the two men with her introductions. “Ryan, Brendon, this is Dr. House. House, this is Ryan Ross and Brendon Urie. The boys are in the area doing some publicity.”
House scanned quickly through his brain, trying to see if he knew them. Nope, didn’t ring a bell. “That’s nice.”
Neither Brendon nor Ryan seemed particularly bothered that House didn’t know who they were. Interesting. House knew that they were obviously somewhat important, hence the chaperoning.
The taller boy, the one that Cuddy identified as Ryan walked past House and gracefully climbed up onto the table. Brendon stuck his hand out. “Nice to meet you. I appreciate you helping us out.”
House stared at the hand and then turned to Ryan. “What’s your ailment?”
Cuddy sighed at House’s slight. “Be nice, House,” she said as she left the room. House waved her off.
Out of the corner of his eye, House could see Brendon sitting down in the empty chair by the door. Ryan shrugged at Brendon and gave him a wry smile.
House focused in on Ryan. He was delicate looking and almost feminine. Boy-pretty, House asserted to himself.
“I’ve been having trouble sleeping. Insomnia.” Ryan’s voice was deeper than House would have imagined. It was smooth and fluid, though it held little inflection.
“Maybe the tight pants you wear are cutting off your circulation,” House quipped. Ryan said nothing. His eyes displayed nothing.
If there was one thing that House loved more than anything else it was solving a mystery. He liked to understand people, discover their secrets. There was definitely something about this Ryan Ross that was intriguing.
“So, you say you can’t sleep.” Ryan nodded. “When did this start?”
Ryan paused, clearly thinking back in his head.
“About three weeks ago,” Brendon’s voice rang out.
House turned and faced the boy. “What are you, his boyfriend?” House took in the younger boy’s full lips and fuller hips. Oh, he was definitely the bottom.
“Band mate,” Brendon replied rather meekly. Ryan smiled reassuringly at Brendon.
Musicians. Great. Though House supposed that certainly explained the eyeliner. Somewhat. House observed the interaction between the two boys. Ryan’s eyes rarely left Brendon, though once and a while he would jerk, as if catching himself doing something wrong.
“Sure, band mates,” House scoffed. “If there’s one thing I’ve learned in my many years in medicine it’s that everyone lies. Especially musicians.”
The boys said nothing.
“So, three weeks. Why can’t you sleep?” Ryan shrugged. He wasn’t being much help.
“Okay then.” House moved across the room to grab a stethoscope. “I’m going to listen to your heartbeat for any irregularities. Just in case.” As he reached towards Ryan to use the instrument the boy flinched.
“Relax; I’m not going to beat you like your father.”
From behind him, House could hear Brendon make an angry noise. For his part, Ryan looked down. “Hm, guess I got that one right.”
“Can we just focus on the insomnia,” Brendon asked, his voice developing an angry edge.
“What are you doing here anyways?” House turned sharply and stared at the boy whose leg was bouncing wildly, though his face was a mask of control.
“I asked him to come,” Ryan said with a sharp edge.
“Why?”
“I wanted him here,” Ryan said still a little angry but blushing. “He’s my best friend.”
House observed the two of them carefully. He couldn’t figure them out. Definitely more research was required.
House directed his attention towards Ryan. “Often times, insomnia is caused by anxiety, stress, or racing thoughts. Have you experienced any of that recently?”
Once again Ryan remained silent and Brendon answered for him. “Well, we’re working on our second record right now. We threw out the whole first batch of lyrics so we’re basically back to step one.”
“Anything else?” House was staring intently at Ryan.
“I just broke up with my girlfriend,” Ryan mumbled.
“Why?” House asked. Ryan didn’t respond. House leaned in close to Ryan’s ear, whispering quietly so only he could hear. “Did she find out that you’re gay?” Ryan flushed red and jerked away from House.
“That’s none of your business,” Ryan said just as quietly. House smirked.
“What?! You and Keltie are over?!” Compared to the quiet murmur of Ryan’s previous words, Brendon’s exclamation amplified in Houses ear.
“Keep it down, will ya?” House flinched.
Brendon threw himself out of his chair and rushed towards Ryan. House smartly backed out of the way. “Why didn’t you tell me that you and Keltie broke up?”
Ryan shrugged.
“I could have helped you. Now it’s manifesting itself in insomnia. I told you, Ryan, you can’t go repressing your emotions.” Brendon frowned, his lips growing fuller at the pull. He gently traced his hand down Ryan’s cheek and House could see how the older boy leaned into the touch. Interesting indeed. “And don’t give me crap about your therapeutic writings because it’s obviously not working.”
“I agree,” House interjected. “You need to get everything out in the open. The only reason you can’t sleep is because you’re having repression issues and anxiety about your feelings.”
Brendon turned his head to stare at House, his mouth was slightly parted, obviously amazed. “What I said was right?”
“In idiots terms, yes.” The small smile that graced Brendon’s face upon hearing of his success quickly dropped at the sting of House’s insult.
“Don’t listen to that ass, Bren,” Ryan whispered, his mouth close to Brendon’s ear. House could see the younger boy shiver at the contact.
“This ass is going to help you with your problem, little emo boy.” For the first time all day, Ryan actually looked offended. “I’m sorry,” House rectified upon seeing Ryan’s face, “I meant little emo man. Obviously.”
House clapped his hands together loudly, causing Ryan to jump slightly against Brendon, falling against his chest. “Now, let’s get those deep dark thoughts exposed!”
Ryan glared up at House. “I’d rather not. It’s personal.”
“Fine,” House said. “I hope that you enjoy your many sleepless nights. Don’t forget to buy some heavy concealor next time you are browsing at the M.A.C. store.”
Brendon huffed. “Come on, Ryan. If this will let you get to sleep it’s worth a try. Dr. House probably doesn’t care what you have to say, and I’m your best friend.”
Still Ryan remained silent.
“Don’t you trust me?” Brendon’s voice wavered, revealing his hurt and insecurity. He pulled away from Ryan a little and House could see a frown start to form on Ryan’s lips.
“Of course I do, Brendon.”
“Then why won’t you tell me?”
Dr. House looked between the two boys. Ryan’s eyes were filled with inner turmoil, irritation, and just a tiny hint of something else. When Ryan still didn’t say anything House decided to intervene.
“Okay, I gave you your chance Ryan. I’ll say it.” House waited a beat, building up the anticipation. “Brendon, Ryan’s in love with you.”
Both boys turned and stared at the doctor. Ryan didn’t say anything. No confirmations or angry rejections were uttered. Brendon’s eyes grew larger as the silence expanded.
“I’m right, aren’t I?” House smugly asked. The expression on their faces was proof enough for him.
“What?” Brendon finally asked.
“Ryan’s in love with you and you’re in love with him.” Nothing. House sighed and continued. “I’ve known you two for about,” House peered down at his watch, “fifteen minutes, and I can tell that you want to bang each other. How could you miss something that obvious?”
Brendon looked over at Ryan. House could see that he had a hopeful expression on his face. “Is it me?” he asked. “Am I the reason that you can’t sleep?”
Ryan sighed, defeated. He raised his head, no longer hiding behind the sweep of his hair. “You’re the reason for everything.” Ryan’s voice had a hint of hesitation and fear in it. It was almost as if he were afraid that Brendon would freak out on him.
Brendon smiled big. He brought his hands up and grasped Ryan’s within his own. “You’re such a nerd.” Brendon leaned forward. He gently brought his hands up to graze the side of Ryan’s face and moved in, his lips aching to touch Ryan’s.
“Stop!” House yelled, breaking Brendon and Ryan out of their trance. “I can’t allow any PDA in here. Well, at least not without a fee. Or if you let me go get a video camera I’m sure that some crazy teenage girls would pay to see this.”
Ryan flicked House off and kissed Brendon.
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