Application: Leo (Fullmetal Alchemist)

[un_locket]

Leo sat in the Sorting Room, staring at the application before him. He was completely mystified by it; from the discussions he'd been overhearing snippets of, it was for some kind of magic school. Now, the only sort of magic he knew anything about was alchemy, and even then his knowledge was limited, but he knew it was nothing he wanted anything to

Comments

[woocha]

Sure you can prove a negative! If you prove you are useful, that's proving that you are the opposite of not useful, which is useless, so, you proved you are not useless!

It sounded a lot better in Wishbone's head.

[un_locket]

That was strange. It almost seemed like that voice had come from the dog down there.

Leo glanced around. "...good point," he said hesitantly. "But who said that?"

[woocha]

I did! Wishbone exclaimed, tail wagging. I'm Wishbone!

[un_locket]

Leo looked around some more, getting wary. That wasn't a voice, now that he thought about it. Not an ordinary one, anyway.

"Are you invisible?"

[lemondrop_party]

Who's Albus Dumbledore, anyway? the application read.

"I am Albus Dumbledore," Dumbledore announced cheerily.

[un_locket]

"Oh." Leo was a bit wary. Was Dumbledore really the kind of person to sexually harass somebody? "Why's your name on here, sir?"

[lemondrop_party]

"My name is on the application because I was once headmaster of this school," said Dumbledore, not taking offense. "I am now a professor emeritus, in residence. I hate to disappoint the students, but I have to insist I would rather not harass anyone, and I cannot bring myself to budge from that position."

His eyes twinkled with grandfatherly humor.

[un_locket]

"O-oh." Well, that was reassuring. "So it's just messing around with people then, huh?" Leo looked down at the application. "You used to be headmaster? So... is this really a school for magic?"

[mischief_fred]

Yay, more fun with Question 5B!

"Oh, all right, so it's okay if Harry messes around with George or me on the side, is it? But when it comes to settling down and being committed, that's a no-go?" Fred asked Leo after bounding into the Sorting Room.

Oh, yes, and he was wearing Tushless Trousers -- the successor to Headless Hats!

[un_locket]

"No, that's not okay either!" Seeing only Fred's frontside, Leo had yet to notice the lack of tush in his trousers. "That's-- you're the Fred guy in this question?"

[mischief_fred]

"In the flesh!" He did a 360 so Leo could see the cleverness of his double entendre.

[un_locket]

Okay what. He quickly covered his eyes and waved his other hand in front of himself as if that would help dispel the image. "You're a sick person!"

[pimpdrow]

Jarlaxle saw the young man who had entered the sorting room and smiled, tipping his huge purple plumed hat and walking in his direction, heels clicking loudly. He was a lithe creature with pure black skin, pointed ears, a cape of swirling rainbow colors, an eyepatch over one eye, and a lot of gold jewelry.

"Ah, I see you take issue with exiles and murderers," he said with a smile. "Personally I have found such individuals are quite useful."

[un_locket]

Leo wasn't sure whether the strange creature's skin, ears, or clothing was more disturbing. Still, he knew better than to comment on the colour of somebody's skin, and Jarlaxle's comment distracted his attention from the other details.

"Useful for what?" he asked hesitantly.

[pimpdrow]

"Useful for what?" Jarlaxle said with a small chuckle. "Why they have many uses, my friend. They already have condemned themselves anyway, so why not take advantage a little; use them to gain information, maybe conduct your dirty work. If they're not good for that, they're whearabouts make excellent currency to their pursuers."

[un_locket]

Leo paused to consider that. Those were all good points. But still -- "Those people should be put to death for what they did, though. If you use 'em for that, they're still alive."

[nazibyproxy]

There was company in the sorting room with him.

"Ah, hello there. Leo, is it?" He offered a friendly smile. "I'm Alfons."

[un_locket]

Finally, somebody who seemed normal. "Hi," he said. "Uh... nice t'meet you, I guess."

[nazibyproxy]

"It's good to meet you too. Do you know what's going on?" he asked, tilting his head slightly.

[un_locket]

He frowned, shaking his head. "No clue. Apparently this is a school for magic, and the former headmaster's trying to tell me that everyone here is some kind of magician even if they don't know it."