Dr. Killjoy, The Suffering

[doctorkilljoy]

There's an ancient, 16mm projector sitting on the stool. It wasn't there two seconds ago, and there doesn't seem to anyone around who could have placed it there. After a few more seconds of silence, it begins to click, winding up to speed. A beam of light is projected from the lens; it displays the image of a stereotypical surgeon from the 1920's

Comments

[whoopwhoowhoop]

Zoidberg stopped reading at question two, nodding enthusiastically.

"Lobotomies are a woooooonderful cure for the common cold! And let me tell, a cold makes everyone behave hoooorribly."

[doctorkilljoy]

Killjoy laughed appreciatively at what was obviously a joke. Heaven knew he'd thought the same thing on numerous occasions. "Are you a doctor as well, then?" he asked, despite the labcoat. One could never be sure, after all, especially where giant, lobster-like creatures were concerned. "Of medicine or psychiatry?"

[whoopwhoowhoop]

"I am indeed!" Zoidberg straightened up, importantly. This man clearly knew his stuff, to be able to recognize Zoidberd's abilities right away. A meeting of the minds, this was sure to be!

"Of medicine, my good sir! I am also an expert in Murderology and Murderonomy!"

[doctorkilljoy]

And a wonderful sense of humor, as well. "That was where I began, medicine. Ah, the life of student. I wouldn't go back to it for all the funding in the world, but it was wonderful practice for reality." He sighed and pulled himself back out of reminiscence. "I am, of course, still a liscensed surgeon. The layman would be astonished to know how often brain surgery is required in mental health."

"Might I ask where you practice?" he asked, though he doubted it was any place he'd ever heard of.

[h_m_winter]

Henry read the application with interest. Camilla had told him about Dr. Killjoy, and Henry had to come see for himself.

"How is it you are tied to the projector?" he asked. "It there some magic involved, or is it something simpler?"

[doctorkilljoy]

"Hm. Well, simpler or more complicated is for you decide," he finally allowed. "My home of Carnate Island is as a swirling vortex of rampant violence. Nothing ever truly dies there; it is...sucked down, if you will, to become part of the whole. A collective of malefactors with forms most horrendous and bizzare. Now, the how, I do not know, but I am sure it is little to do with magic. However you prefer to use the term."

Subsequent conversation is warded for Henry and Dr. Killjoy

[h_m_winter]

Pulling his wand from his pocket, Henry cast a silencing ward, so that no one else could overhear them. "So it's an in-between state...and you can travel with these projectors, wherever they might be taken? There is no...territory dispute?"

Re: Subsequent conversation is warded for Henry and Dr. Killjoy

[doctorkilljoy]

[[Er, can I still hear people outside the ward? Not that it probably matters much here, but just for future reference.]]

And he was waving a stick around in the air. Killjoy very nearly commented on that, until he remembered the nice young woman (and had she introduced herself? He couldn't quite recall her name if she had) who had mentioned the need for wands.

"There can be. As I was telling that young woman earlier, there are two spirits besides myself who occupy Carnate, and I can't venture into areas they control. And vice versa of course. But as neither of them are here, I don't forsee many problems. Er, outside my inability to leave this room yet.

"Tell me," he waved his hand in a loose rendition of wand waving, "that was a...charm of some kind?"

[ugly_old_hat]

"Well, well, well! It seems the votes for you are almost unanimous ... what's this I hear about Jengapuff?" The Hat bobbed its brim in a manner one might call inquisitive, if one were given to personifying hats.

[doctorkilljoy]

Killjoy stared. The hat was talking. He might have thought himself insane if he didn't know he was immune to such ailments. Clearly, he'd been wrong. It was no school (and for magic! Hah!). His time in Carnate had merely been a form of purgatory, and by some gross miscarriage of justice, he had been found wanting. It was a psychiatrist's Hell.

"Er...that armless fellow...I believe..." he managed weakly.

[ugly_old_hat]

"There are so many students who share a lack of visible arms!" The Hat was being coy. Of course it had all been recorded in the Sorting Room Pensieve, who gave what votes. "I don't have visible arms!"

[doctorkilljoy]

It was a talking hat! Of course, it didn't have arms! But he restrained himself, instead giving a muttered, "Oh, yes. Of course."

...Freud would have something very interesting to say about that.

Ravenclaw!

[ugly_old_hat]

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