Destined, chapter 3
Title: Destined
Fandom: Heroes
Pairing: Peter/Claire, Zach/Claire friendship
Rating: PG
Summary: Zach's always there to listen when she talks about Peter. This Chapter: Claire's rescue attempt is thwarted.
Previous Chapters: 1, 2
Fic Art: HERE. ♥
A/N: I seem to like writing Depressed!Claire. Though hopefully it's still IC and I didn't go overboard. I hope everyone likes this! :)
Chapter Three - Homecoming
Claire's at a truck stop in Midland, studying a map intensely and trying not to panic. Zach's in the bathroom and she's just realized that she has absolutely no idea where she's going. Her destination is New York, but she has no clue how to get there and, apparently, no clue how to read a map.
"Ugh!" she says frustratedly, stamping her foot and regretting that she had never paid attention in geography class. She wishes that reading maps easily and effectively was her power.
Feeling a tap on her shoulder, Claire jumps about a foot in the air before turning around and smacking Zach for scaring her. Only it's not Zach.
"Dad?" she says, feeling her heart sink.
*
When Zach comes out of the bathroom, Claire doesn't notice. She's too busy yelling at her father.
"How can you not understand how important this is to me?" she cries, throwing the giant, unreadable map in his face.
"Claire, I understand," her dad says, moving closer to her. "I understand that you feel connected to him, that he saved your life and that he's your uncle. I understand. But sneaking out in the middle of the night, involving Zach... that's not the way to go about things."
"I was willing, Mr. Bennet," Zach says, interrupting the scene. "I just wanted to see Claire smile again, you know?"
*
In the car ride on the way home, Claire chooses to sit in the backseat with Zach. She takes his hand in hers, thanking him for at least trying to help her.
*
A week later she sits on the steps in the front of her school, even though it's the middle of the day and class is going on. It doesn't feel right to be learning about algebra when Peter is still out there somewhere dead or dying. School is nothing but guys trying to be cool and girls trying to get their attention, and Claire knows that this isn't who she is anymore.
What she is, she doesn't really know. She used to classify herself as a cheerleader, and in New York she thought maybe she could call herself a hero, but that's laughable now.
Even so, it's hard to go back to being "just a cheerleader". It seems so childish - a happy flick of red pom poms here and a bright white smile there - and she knows that she's past this point in her life. The joy had started to seep out of it after Jackie had died, and now, despite being promoted to Captain, all the thrill of it is gone. She thinks maybe she'd enjoy cheerleading if she knew Peter was okay; all of her time is spent worrying about him now, waiting for any sign that he's alive, and it's hard for her to enjoy anything anymore.
*
"What are you doing out here, Claire?" he asks, setting down his bag beside her. She's on the football field in the rain, sitting on the topmost bleacher, her uniform plastered to her white skin.
She doesn't answer him.
"When the hell did you start smoking?" he asks, glaring at the cigarette in her fingers with a mixture of surprise and disgust.
Claire shrugs. "Laurie's boyfriend smokes."
"So?"
In truth, it's only her second cigarette and probably her last, but it's a comfort and she needs all the comfort she can get.
She stands, almost slipping on the wet bleachers, but Zach grabs her arm to steady her.
"Seriously, Claire," he says, standing up with her.
She laughs hollowly. "It's not like I'll get cancer," she says, but she puts out the cigarette for his sake.
*
Claire thinks she's going crazy.
She'll be walking around town or cheering on the football field when she sees them - Peter and Nathan. Sometimes it's just Peter, looking the way he did when he told her life after high school gets better. Sometimes it's just Nathan, looking the way he did when he told her that he wanted to be there for her. And sometimes they're both there, smiling, as if they know something she doesn't.
One day she breaks down and starts yelling at their blurry forms, "This is sick, okay? Stop following me! I don't like stalkers!" She's not yelling because she's angry that the images keep haunting her - she's yelling because she's afraid that if she's seeing ghosts, then it means they're really dead.
*
"My dad told me I needed therapy," Claire sighs, resting her head on Zach's shoulder.
"What do you think?"
A shrug. "He says I need closure."
"Do you?"
"No." She shakes her head sadly. "I just want them back."
She's beginning to think she never will.
*
She's standing in the cafeteria, arms folded across her chest, waiting for the lunch line to move. It always seems to move at a snail's pace, and it's grating on her nerves.
When Claire finally reaches the counter, pink tray in her hands, she sighs. There's no more chocolate milk left. She catches the attention of one of the lunch ladies and asks if there's any more in the refridgerator and the lady shakes her head.
"Damn it," Claire says, feeling tears prickle in the corners of her eyes. It seems like everything is affecting her these days.
"Here, you can have mine," says the boy in front of her. Claire looks up at him as he hands her the brown carton of milk and sees that he's tall, with dark hair and brown eyes.
She lowers her own eyes. "Thanks," she says quietly.
*
She finds Zach and sits next to him, just like she always does. He's talking about a science test he just passed with flying colors, but she's too distracted to pay attention to him today. She keeps seeing the boy with dark hair and brown eyes in her head, and thinking about how Peter had dark hair and brown eyes, too.
*
She skips school for the hundredth time, goes to the highest bridge she can find, and jumps off.
When her body heals, she lets out a cry of angry frustration. If Peter could die despite his ability to regenerate, then why couldn't she?
She falls off the bridge over and over again, purposely trying to land on a bed of sticks she has arranged, hoping that one of them gets stuck in the back of her head.
*
When Claire's exhausted from killing herself repeatedly, she turns and sees that Zach's been standing there the whole time, watching her.
She snaps the five fingers of her right hand back into place simultaneously, and walks over to him. "Don't say a word," she says, climbing onto his handlebars.
He does anyway. "Maybe you do need therapy."
She responds, even though she wants to ignore him. "Maybe I do."
*
"Alright, squad!" she screams, a smile pasted on her face. "Nice work today. See you tomorrow!"
But the cheerleaders don't start to dispand. Claire looks at them, confused. "I said practice was over."
Melanie Bishop walks up to her, an almost regrettable expression on her face. "Claire, we need to talk," she says in a business like tone.
"What is it?"
"Well, I think...that you need to be replaced as Captain."
Claire glares up at Melanie, wishing she was taller so she could be more intimidating. "Why would that be?"
"Your heart just doesn't seem to be in it, Claire," says another girl, Patty Swanson. "Your mind has been up in the clouds lately. And ever since Jackie..." She pauses, clearly struggling with her words. "We're not trying to be mean or anything, seriously - "
Claire scoffs.
" - we just think you need to focus on something other than cheerleading right now. Like whatever's been bugging you," finishes Melanie.
Claire looks around at the other girls, taking note of their ground-fixated stares. Feeling all the tension bubble inside of her, she snaps, "Does everyone feel this way about me?"
Their silence is enough of an answer. It's too much. Throwing her pom-poms into Melanie's face, she runs to the locker room and cries.
*
When Claire finally stops crying, her Sidekick is blinking, but she doesn't check to see who the message is from; she knows automatically that it's Zach.
Walking out of the locker room, she shivers from the cold. It's gotten dark now; the stadium lights shine dimly on the football field. She reaches the corner of the field where she had been teaching the squad a new cheer only a couple hours before, and rolls her eyes angrily - the stupid bitches have left the boombox on the field. And they say my head is in the clouds? she thinks.
She tosses her backpack over her shoulder and picks up the boombox with one hand, slowly walking in a daze, losing herself, as always, in thoughts of Nathan and Peter and the family that she could have had. Claire brings up a hand to wipe away a tear from her face - God, she'd thought she was done crying for one night - and sniffs loudly.
Everything is all her fault. She's a freakshow that can bring herself back from the dead, and she's put everyone she's ever loved in danger because of it. She'd tried to kill Brody, had been the reason for Jackie's death. She couldn't bring herself to shoot Peter, and now he and Nathan are dead. She hadn't even been successful at being a good cheerleader, and now she has nothing.
The light coming from her bag starts to annoy her and she pulls out her blinking Sidekick, flipping it open. Zach has left her ten messages, all of them saying the same thing.
*
To: ClaireBearCheerleader
From: FilmsByZach
I don't know where you are right now, but you need to get home ASAP.
*
Rolling her eyes, she shoves the Sidekick back in her bag; he's probably found out how to do something new and geeky on his computer.
"Claire?" says a voice through the darkness.
"What?" she says back, like a reflex.
A pause.
Slowly, she looks up, and all the air seems to leave her lungs when she sees the person standing not even five feet away from her.
"Peter?"
Read the next chapter here!
FRIEND this journal for updates.
SEE the complete list of all the writing I've done. Includes my own fiction/poems, plus fanfic.
Fandom: Heroes
Pairing: Peter/Claire, Zach/Claire friendship
Rating: PG
Summary: Zach's always there to listen when she talks about Peter. This Chapter: Claire's rescue attempt is thwarted.
Previous Chapters: 1, 2
Fic Art: HERE. ♥
A/N: I seem to like writing Depressed!Claire. Though hopefully it's still IC and I didn't go overboard. I hope everyone likes this! :)
Chapter Three - Homecoming
Claire's at a truck stop in Midland, studying a map intensely and trying not to panic. Zach's in the bathroom and she's just realized that she has absolutely no idea where she's going. Her destination is New York, but she has no clue how to get there and, apparently, no clue how to read a map.
"Ugh!" she says frustratedly, stamping her foot and regretting that she had never paid attention in geography class. She wishes that reading maps easily and effectively was her power.
Feeling a tap on her shoulder, Claire jumps about a foot in the air before turning around and smacking Zach for scaring her. Only it's not Zach.
"Dad?" she says, feeling her heart sink.
*
When Zach comes out of the bathroom, Claire doesn't notice. She's too busy yelling at her father.
"How can you not understand how important this is to me?" she cries, throwing the giant, unreadable map in his face.
"Claire, I understand," her dad says, moving closer to her. "I understand that you feel connected to him, that he saved your life and that he's your uncle. I understand. But sneaking out in the middle of the night, involving Zach... that's not the way to go about things."
"I was willing, Mr. Bennet," Zach says, interrupting the scene. "I just wanted to see Claire smile again, you know?"
*
In the car ride on the way home, Claire chooses to sit in the backseat with Zach. She takes his hand in hers, thanking him for at least trying to help her.
*
A week later she sits on the steps in the front of her school, even though it's the middle of the day and class is going on. It doesn't feel right to be learning about algebra when Peter is still out there somewhere dead or dying. School is nothing but guys trying to be cool and girls trying to get their attention, and Claire knows that this isn't who she is anymore.
What she is, she doesn't really know. She used to classify herself as a cheerleader, and in New York she thought maybe she could call herself a hero, but that's laughable now.
Even so, it's hard to go back to being "just a cheerleader". It seems so childish - a happy flick of red pom poms here and a bright white smile there - and she knows that she's past this point in her life. The joy had started to seep out of it after Jackie had died, and now, despite being promoted to Captain, all the thrill of it is gone. She thinks maybe she'd enjoy cheerleading if she knew Peter was okay; all of her time is spent worrying about him now, waiting for any sign that he's alive, and it's hard for her to enjoy anything anymore.
*
"What are you doing out here, Claire?" he asks, setting down his bag beside her. She's on the football field in the rain, sitting on the topmost bleacher, her uniform plastered to her white skin.
She doesn't answer him.
"When the hell did you start smoking?" he asks, glaring at the cigarette in her fingers with a mixture of surprise and disgust.
Claire shrugs. "Laurie's boyfriend smokes."
"So?"
In truth, it's only her second cigarette and probably her last, but it's a comfort and she needs all the comfort she can get.
She stands, almost slipping on the wet bleachers, but Zach grabs her arm to steady her.
"Seriously, Claire," he says, standing up with her.
She laughs hollowly. "It's not like I'll get cancer," she says, but she puts out the cigarette for his sake.
*
Claire thinks she's going crazy.
She'll be walking around town or cheering on the football field when she sees them - Peter and Nathan. Sometimes it's just Peter, looking the way he did when he told her life after high school gets better. Sometimes it's just Nathan, looking the way he did when he told her that he wanted to be there for her. And sometimes they're both there, smiling, as if they know something she doesn't.
One day she breaks down and starts yelling at their blurry forms, "This is sick, okay? Stop following me! I don't like stalkers!" She's not yelling because she's angry that the images keep haunting her - she's yelling because she's afraid that if she's seeing ghosts, then it means they're really dead.
*
"My dad told me I needed therapy," Claire sighs, resting her head on Zach's shoulder.
"What do you think?"
A shrug. "He says I need closure."
"Do you?"
"No." She shakes her head sadly. "I just want them back."
She's beginning to think she never will.
*
She's standing in the cafeteria, arms folded across her chest, waiting for the lunch line to move. It always seems to move at a snail's pace, and it's grating on her nerves.
When Claire finally reaches the counter, pink tray in her hands, she sighs. There's no more chocolate milk left. She catches the attention of one of the lunch ladies and asks if there's any more in the refridgerator and the lady shakes her head.
"Damn it," Claire says, feeling tears prickle in the corners of her eyes. It seems like everything is affecting her these days.
"Here, you can have mine," says the boy in front of her. Claire looks up at him as he hands her the brown carton of milk and sees that he's tall, with dark hair and brown eyes.
She lowers her own eyes. "Thanks," she says quietly.
*
She finds Zach and sits next to him, just like she always does. He's talking about a science test he just passed with flying colors, but she's too distracted to pay attention to him today. She keeps seeing the boy with dark hair and brown eyes in her head, and thinking about how Peter had dark hair and brown eyes, too.
*
She skips school for the hundredth time, goes to the highest bridge she can find, and jumps off.
When her body heals, she lets out a cry of angry frustration. If Peter could die despite his ability to regenerate, then why couldn't she?
She falls off the bridge over and over again, purposely trying to land on a bed of sticks she has arranged, hoping that one of them gets stuck in the back of her head.
*
When Claire's exhausted from killing herself repeatedly, she turns and sees that Zach's been standing there the whole time, watching her.
She snaps the five fingers of her right hand back into place simultaneously, and walks over to him. "Don't say a word," she says, climbing onto his handlebars.
He does anyway. "Maybe you do need therapy."
She responds, even though she wants to ignore him. "Maybe I do."
*
"Alright, squad!" she screams, a smile pasted on her face. "Nice work today. See you tomorrow!"
But the cheerleaders don't start to dispand. Claire looks at them, confused. "I said practice was over."
Melanie Bishop walks up to her, an almost regrettable expression on her face. "Claire, we need to talk," she says in a business like tone.
"What is it?"
"Well, I think...that you need to be replaced as Captain."
Claire glares up at Melanie, wishing she was taller so she could be more intimidating. "Why would that be?"
"Your heart just doesn't seem to be in it, Claire," says another girl, Patty Swanson. "Your mind has been up in the clouds lately. And ever since Jackie..." She pauses, clearly struggling with her words. "We're not trying to be mean or anything, seriously - "
Claire scoffs.
" - we just think you need to focus on something other than cheerleading right now. Like whatever's been bugging you," finishes Melanie.
Claire looks around at the other girls, taking note of their ground-fixated stares. Feeling all the tension bubble inside of her, she snaps, "Does everyone feel this way about me?"
Their silence is enough of an answer. It's too much. Throwing her pom-poms into Melanie's face, she runs to the locker room and cries.
*
When Claire finally stops crying, her Sidekick is blinking, but she doesn't check to see who the message is from; she knows automatically that it's Zach.
Walking out of the locker room, she shivers from the cold. It's gotten dark now; the stadium lights shine dimly on the football field. She reaches the corner of the field where she had been teaching the squad a new cheer only a couple hours before, and rolls her eyes angrily - the stupid bitches have left the boombox on the field. And they say my head is in the clouds? she thinks.
She tosses her backpack over her shoulder and picks up the boombox with one hand, slowly walking in a daze, losing herself, as always, in thoughts of Nathan and Peter and the family that she could have had. Claire brings up a hand to wipe away a tear from her face - God, she'd thought she was done crying for one night - and sniffs loudly.
Everything is all her fault. She's a freakshow that can bring herself back from the dead, and she's put everyone she's ever loved in danger because of it. She'd tried to kill Brody, had been the reason for Jackie's death. She couldn't bring herself to shoot Peter, and now he and Nathan are dead. She hadn't even been successful at being a good cheerleader, and now she has nothing.
The light coming from her bag starts to annoy her and she pulls out her blinking Sidekick, flipping it open. Zach has left her ten messages, all of them saying the same thing.
*
To: ClaireBearCheerleader
From: FilmsByZach
I don't know where you are right now, but you need to get home ASAP.
*
Rolling her eyes, she shoves the Sidekick back in her bag; he's probably found out how to do something new and geeky on his computer.
"Claire?" says a voice through the darkness.
"What?" she says back, like a reflex.
A pause.
Slowly, she looks up, and all the air seems to leave her lungs when she sees the person standing not even five feet away from her.
"Peter?"
Read the next chapter here!
FRIEND this journal for updates.
SEE the complete list of all the writing I've done. Includes my own fiction/poems, plus fanfic.