Dark of the Moon (27/36)

[geekmama]

A little more Dark of the Moon, which hereswith was kind enough to edit for me earlier today. It could conceivably be counted toward the drabble theme of the week at Black Pearl Tales...

Comments

[hendercats]

The Pearl moved over the water under dark clouds of full, billowing sail, her masts and yards and stays and all the edges of her limned in gold from the westering sun.
Oooh! You're doing light paintings- how absolutely lovely!

it had not been kind of him to go with the Señora ...
... And yet... she still could not resist him.
Poor, poor Letty! No hope for her now (was there ever?).

Enjoyed her description of Jack - looks, voice, movement - especially the calculated savagery of his hair - wonderful!! Loving every chapter and looking forward to more.

[geekmama]

Jack and Pearl are always so worthy of description. I'm very glad you enjoyed that, and that you liked this little bit. Yes, poor Letty. She's a goner.

[hereswith]

This part is really lovely and poignant, not to mention there are gorgeous descriptions of both Jack and the Pearl :-) I love ...she would not only remember him, but would long for him in a way to which no female with the smallest pretension to honor or gentility could admit. Have I said how much I like Letty? Because I do, you've really made her come to life for us, her thoughts and her worries and her growing attraction for Jack. Wonderful, my dear.

[geekmama]

Have I said how much I like Letty? Because I do, you've really made her come to life for us, her thoughts and her worries and her growing attraction for Jack.

Thank you so much! That is such a wonderful thing to hear. I love writing the canon characters, but it's great fun trying to give life to OC's, too. One of these days I'll try to write something original again.

[erinya]

I'm finally getting caught up on this! As has already been mentioned, your description of Jack is really lovely. I don't blame Letty for studying him.

[geekmama]

I don't blame her, either. I've been doing it for years, myself. *G*

Glad you enjoyed! Thanks for commenting. :)

[tessabeth]

Mmmmm, description. I do like it, reading Jack described in detail ('specially when the details's as beautifully worded as the calculated savagery of his hair, the youthful incompleteness of his beard); it makes me look at him properly, in my head. Polishes up the detail on that little 'maginary Jack who skulks constantly around the darker recesses of my skull. Scrumptious creature! (Him, and you, petal.)

[geekmama]

Jack Description is always fun to read, particularly from another character's pov, I think. honorat has a new OC, a little boy who's ended up on the Pearl (and is now in the middle of a Pearl/Dauntless battle that she's writing -- you should read Crossing the Bar, btw, the ship/battle research she's done is astounding, yet it's never dry, the characters really grab you; the next chapter she's posting is really intense and graphically violent, however, so be warned) and she's thinking of writing the story of how the kid and Jack met from the kid's pov, which should be great fun. Come to think of it, that would be fun to read from you, as regards your OC's.

(Of course the plot bunnies I could come up for you to write are practically endless. And I'm just really thankful you and your esteemed co-author are going to favor us with another JS/JS tale, of any sort! *bounces happily*)

[tessabeth]

GOD DAMMIT SHARON!

I had a peek at Crossing the Bar and now I can't stop reading it. I can't get out of bed, I have the first nine chapters on the laptop and am trapped and engrossed and I HAVE WORK TO DO DAMMIT.

You are an evil, evil woman. It is FAB.

[geekmama]

I feel so privileged to be her beta reader. Not that it needs much tweaking, but then I get to see the chapters and comment before everyone else, and it's so much easier to just highlight phrases, lines, paragraphs. The next chapter is quite heartrendingly gruesome, I'm afraid, and the one after that scary/funny/repleat with fascinating ship detail. She's really done her research, and she has a keen eye for the characters we all love.

Yes, I am evil. So glad you're enjoying it!

[honorat]

I solemnly swear that I will eventually get all these little gems reviewed. Everyone keeps saying how nice it is to have at least one ongoing story that isn’t a nailbiter, and it’s true. You’ve got a lovely bittersweet romance here to counteract those of us who are turning him into Dauntless chow or mermaid chow or unidentified evil chow or Jaguar madness curse chow. Kudos to you! Jack’s lucky to have you, and so are we.

Lots of beautiful things to love in this chapter. The picture of the Black Pearl lit with gold. Jack’s dreams for her when she’s his that are so poignant because of the terrible future that awaits this man and this ship.

Too cold there, both in the physical and the metaphorical sense.
Ha! That would be Jack’s opinion.

She flushed, but returned his regard, steadily. “I certainly won’t forget you.”
He nodded. “Good enough. That’s ever an object with me, that not forgetting.” And yet he sounded a little wistful as he said this. This is another poignant moment. Letty’s good save-never tell the truth when you can

[geekmama]

Almost done with this, if you can believe it -- only three sections left to write. I'm hoping to have 31-33 up tomorrow, and then the rest over the next week or so. WhooHoo!

Thank you so much for the detailed feedback. I am very happy that this story has found a niche with readers who need a little break from all the mayhem. I like romances, both to read and write, because one knows that ultimately things will turn out OK. Of course this one is bittersweet, but there will still be a satisfying warm fuzzy ending, with a couple of surprises (I hope).