Well 4th ed of D&D is out.I think it is wonderful.  I have been having some success in my relationship/love life..it is moving slowly but moving. And that is all I wish to say on that. I am still unable to float a car loan due to thet whole rent thing but...I am not suprised. I wil lfind a way to ditch Patience by the end of June. And SERENITY NOW ( Read more... )

Today I blew a great deal of cash on bills. But that is unimportant. What is important is I saw the film Redbelt...Directed and I belive written by David Mamet. It is one of the best meditations on honor I have ever seen .It reminded me why I do certain things that I do the way I do them. I am amazed at the depth of feeling this provoked in me. I ( Read more... )

 And still it stays the same. Well I am single once again. I have a new friend out of it but it still stings...but not as badly as I expected...I must be making some sort of progress in therapy. But life goes on....a bit more dangerous for the world as I don't have that release ( Read more... )

 Thursday and I am posting. Well today agfter reducing my sessions to twice monthly I find I may have been premature. I found my self unreasonably angry at the world for an inconvinence. This upsets me in ways that a hard to describe...it makes me fell as if I am still flawed somehow. I know I am not but  it still strikes me that way. And it wasn't ( Read more... )

Is the subject of todays meditation. I hit my first snag in a polyamorus relationship today. It involves her primary and the growing distance between them.  Some thing do not chage even after damn near half a year of therapy and that is this...my first reaction to some one I care for in pain is to help them and then if it is a caused by a person ( Read more... )

Seems to be an analogy that my mind is comfortable with. In therapy we are working on building a bypass as it were around my anger thoroughfare. And I find that my therapy is been fairly successful. That sword analogy for myself still holds. I'm working up a sheath and while all the nicks aren't out of the blade...and some are too deep to ( Read more... )

Was the main subject of todays conversations and therapy. It is strange to talk so much on this subject for me as it relates to my own relationships.But I have come to realize that I look directly at so many other things that to not look directly at this is a diservice to myself and anyone I will or have been involved with.  Thus I am learning to ( Read more... )

 So its Post time. SO in work news we are hemmorraghing personell at work of them the only one I'll miss is Roy. He is a fellow Geek and all around good fella. But the gig he is getting is a lateral shift and it will give him more cash and more time with his kids...so that is a plus. As for me the Yahoo gig should start up in March.Stay tuned for ( Read more... )

 I find myself some times not writing things in my journals.Not because they aren't important...but because they sound petty. I know that can be ridiculous but there it is.But in other news therapy is apperently going much better than I thought. I have made progress in the last five months thatI haven't even realized. It is kind of weird...but very ( Read more... )

 I caught up on my bills and therapy went well yesterday. I found out that the SOP and Emergency manuals I was working on was really just to be the emergency manuals.Of course I started with the sop book as it was shorter.So that time is a bust but  it  could be worse ( Read more... )