i'm pretty sure we're married in some cultures.
NONE OF YOU SHOULD EVER STOP TALKING TO ME ABOUT SPELL BOUND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA CAL DIED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA SORRY I KNOW IT WAS NOBLE AND ALL BUT I HONESTLY DID BURST OUT LAUGHING WHEN THAT HAPPENED! SORRY CAL! BETTER LUCK NEXT TIME! SORRY YOU HAVE LITERALLY NOTHING IN YOUR LIFE OTHER THAN GRAYMALKIN ISLAND AND A GIRL WHO DOESN'T LOVE YOU BACK? YIKES!
EVERYTHING WAS FUCKING PERFECT! NGL when the first THIRD of the book was all Brannick shit I was like UHHHHHHHH IF THIS BOOK REALLY IS THE HEX HALL VERSION OF MOCKINGJAY I WILL KILL EVERYONE, ALSO PLEASE TELL ME ARCHER IS GOING TO SHOW UP SOON, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, I CAN'T DEAL WITH ANOTHER BOOK THAT HE'S BARELY IN, I CANNOT! And uhhhhhh then Lara had the same fucking idea, apparently, because she was like YEAH LET'S JUST MAGIC ALL OF THE IMPORTANT PEOPLE TO THE SAME PLACE AND LOCK THEM THERE TOGETHER SO THEY ALL HAVE TO HANG OUT ALL THE TIME AND MAKE OUT AT INAPPROPRIATE MOMENTS!
More importantly though after the end of Demonglass: EVERYONE IMPORTANT LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sorry, Cal.
SOPHIE'S DAD WAS OKAY!!!!!!!!!!!! [SOPHIE'S DAD WAS OKAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!] Guys, I was rereading Demonglass today and REMEMBER HOW FUCKING GREAT SOPHIE'S DAD IS? he just loves her so much and he's so happy to finally be in her life i can't i can't i can't
AND HE'S OKAY!!!!!! COVERED IN PURPLE TATTOOS BUT HE'S OKAY AND HE FUCKING CRIED WHEN HE GOT SOPHIE BACK AND HE AND SOPHIE'S MOM ARE BACK TOGETHER AND MAKING OUT ALL OVER THE PLACE LIKE THEIR NAMES ARE MERCER AND CROSS INSTEAD OF BRANNICK [!!!!!!] AND ATHERTON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SOPHIE'S OKAY AND ALL HER PEOPLE ARE OKAY! ARCHER'S OKAY! JENNA'S OKAY! VIX IS OKAY WHEREVER SHE IS! ELODIE'S SORT OF OKAY! Cal's dead. It's still funny.
I was SUPER worried that Sophie was going to lose her powers, since her demon blood was still linked to Lara and Anastasia and she was REVERSING ALL THE CASNOFF DEMONS, but nope! Everything was cool! SHE'S THE ONLY DEMON NOW, EVERYONE CAN FUCKING SUCK IT, AND THE NEW COUNCIL MADE HER THEIR BOSS EVEN THOUGH SHE'S ONLY SEVENTEEN BECAUSE SHE'S JUST THAT FUCKING AWESOME! But Sophie's like THANKS, GUYS, BUT NO THANKS, I'D LIKE TO GO BACK TO JUVIE FOR MONSTERS FOR A YEAR AND THEN GO TO COLLEGE! WITH MY VAMPIRE BEST FRIEND AND MY BOYFRIEND WHOSE FAKE NAME IS WAY BETTER THAN HIS REAL NAME! [Put "Daniel Anderson" on the list of NAMES I REFUSE TO ACKNOWLEDGE, right under ANDRE MICHAUX and ETIENNE!!!!!!]
REMEMBER HOW AFTER DEMONGLASS I WAS LIKE "ALL I WANT IN THE WORLD IS FIC ABOUT SOPHIE AND ARCHER GOING OFF THE GRID AND POSING AS HUMANS AT A NORMAL HIGH SCHOOL AND GOING TO PROM AND SHIT" AND IT'S NOT EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED, BUT WHAT HAPPENED WAS EVEN BETTER? Guys! They're all going to have a carefree senior year at Hex Hall where nobody dies and their main concern is DETENTION, aka Jenna is very concerned with NEVER GETTING IT because Archer and Sophie are always deliberately provoking the Vandy into giving them cellar duty and JENNA KNOWS WHAT THEY'RE DOING DOWN THERE, OKAY, AND SHE DOES NOT WANT TO BE SUBJECTED TO IT.
And then they're all going to graduate/get released from HH and GO TO MOTHERFUCKING NORMAL HUMAN COLLEGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Because where Sophie goes, SO GOES ARCHER'S NATION, and Jenna literally has ETERNITY ahead of her, why not do human youth stuff while she's still teenaged in every sense of the world? [Cal can't go to college with them because he's dead. Sorry, Cal!] FOUR YEARS OF SOPHIE AND JENNA AND ARCHER IN COLLEGE! Freshman year Sophie and Jenna are roommates; sophomore year Jenna lives at her sorority and Sophie and Archer have an apartment where they bang all the time, NATCH.
THESE BOOKS!!!!!!!! Rereading the first two I realized there are some passages that are never NOT going to explode my heart, like:
We'd laughed again, and Archer has just been a boy I liked, and I'd thought the only secret between us was just how much I liked him.
AND:
"This thing with us is the only real thing I've had in a long time. You're the only real thing."
AND NOW THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!
"Whatever's down there," Archer said after a moment, "it's hard-core enough that Casnoff went to all this trouble to hold it. Are you sure you want to do this, Mercer?"
"Of course I don't," I said, grabbing the iron ring affixed to the trap door. "But I'm gonna."
SOPHIE MERCER, YOU FUCKING WARRIOR YOU!!!!!!!! Ugh I love how Archer is the one who's been trained to deal with this shit ever since he was a BABY, he's an actual TEEN SOLDIER, but Sophie's the one who takes the lead always BECAUSE SHE'S SO GOOD AND STRONG AND WILLFUL!!!!!!!!!!!! SOPHIE MERCER! OR ATHERTON, OR BRANNICK, OR WHATEVER THE FUCK YOUR NAME IS! [THEIR NAMES AREN'T REALLY MERCER AND CROSS, NOT EVEN A LITTLE BIT!!!!!!!]
AND THEN THIS:
"Apparently I'm claustrophobic now. That's, uh, new. Probably a side effect of fleeing a burning building through an underground tunnel. Yay for psychological trauma."
"Come back up," Archer said automatically, and I kind of loved him for that.
I KIND OF LOVE THIS LINE FOR THAT! UUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH it is so great for SO MANY REASONS, like Archer is being reflexively but also calmly and rationally and casually protective, and Sophie KIND OF LOVES HIM FOR THAT BECAUSE LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE, but I love how the tone is almost a little condescending, if affectionately so? Like, she loves him for saying it, but bitch please: Sophie Mercer doesn't back down from anything, and she knows he knows it. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY: SOPHIE MERCER DOESN'T BACK DOWN FROM ANYTHING! SHE'S GOING TO GO FIRST AND JOKE ABOUT HOW IT'S BECAUSE OTHERWISE HE'LL JUST LOOK UP HER SKIRT [AND I WILL GET TO THE RETURN OF THE UNIFORMS LATER] BUT REALLY IT'S BECAUSE SOPHIE MERCER IS A FUCKING BADASS AND IT'S HER FUCKING DESTINY TO SAVE THE ENTIRE FUCKING WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! If Archer wants to help he's welcome to follow her into hell but LET'S BE CLEAR ON WHO IS DOING THE HEAVY LIFTING!!! NBD SHE'S JUST GOING TO GO TO THE UNDERWORLD BY HERSELF TO COLLECT SOME LITERALLY GOD DAMNED DEMONGLASS EVEN THOUGH IT BURNS HER HANDS! GLOVES? SOPHIA BRANNICK ATHERTON MERCER DOESN'T NEED ANY FUCKING GLOVES.
OKAY BUT RETURN OF THE UNIFORMS: Everyone getting sucked back to a nightmare version of Hex Hall was EVERYTHING I NEVER KNEW I WANTED. LOL at how Prodigium are the worst so instead of the Battle of Hogwarts we just had EVERYONE GETTING TURNED INTO DEMONS because they're terrible. IT'S COOL, THOUGH, BECAUSE SOPHIE AND HER CREW ARE AWESOME ENOUGH TO MAKE UP FOR ALL ONE HUNDRED OF THEM!!!! Everyone's just back in school and in their uniforms again! No big deal! The whole building is gross and mildewy now! The world is falling down around them! ALL SOPHIE AND ARCHER CARE ABOUT IS MAKING OUT ALL THE TIME! FUCKING PERFECT! EVERYTHING WAS FUCKING PERFECT!
AND ARCHER AND JENNA ARE BROS NOW! Ugh my favorite part of their new friendship was DEFINITELY him quietly apologizing to her in hell when they saw the Eye killing Amanda. SO GREAT! SO GREAT! Jenna and Archer as Sophie's platonic Ron and Hermione = my whole shit, basically. OF COURSE WE'RE STAYING AT HEX HALL WITH YOU, WHERE ELSE WOULD WE GO? OF COURSE WE'RE WALKING INTO HELL WITH YOU. ARCHER'S IN LOVE WITH HIS TENT AND FUCK IF JENNA'S GONNA LET YOU DIE BEFORE YOU CAN GET THOSE BFF BLOODSTONE NECKLACES MADE.
[SUPER sad about how the book ended with Archer completely cut off from the Eye, by the way. I was SUPER INTO that one fight he and Sophie had where he pointed out that she was able to trust the Brannicks because they were family, but the Eye was his family, which was SUCH A GOOD POINT, EXCELLENT DEBATING SKILLS, CROSS, but then he was wrong! Even the small faction that was willing to come and help him out turned out to be DUDES HE HAD JUST MIND CONTROLLED INTO HELPING HIM! ARCHER! I'M SO SORRY YOUR FAMILY DOESN'T LOVE YOU! SOPHIE LOVES YOU ENOUGH TO MAKE UP FOR ALL OF THEM AND I'M PRETTY SURE HER PARENTS WILL WELCOME YOU INTO THE FOLD SEEING HOW YOU VOLUNTEERED TO WALK INTO HELL WITH THEIR DAUGHTER AND ALL, ESPECIALLY SINCE THE FIANCE THEY PICKED OUT FOR HER IS DEAD. SORRY, CAL!
AND THE ENDING!!!!!!
"So really," said Jenna, and looped her arm through mine, "what more do you need?"
I looked back and forth between them, these two people I loved so much. The breeze ruffled the tall grass around the pond, and I thought I could hear Elodie's laugh.
"Nothing," I told them, squeezing both their hands. "Nothing."
LIKE I SAID, OPPOSITE OF MOCKINGJAY!!!!!! WHEN I FINISHED MOCKINGJAY I REMOVED THE FINAL FEW PAGES WITH A BOX CUTTER AND THEN FLUSHED THEM DOWN THE TOILET BECAUSE I DIDN'T KNOW HOW ELSE TO DEAL WITH THE AWFULNESS! HERE I CAN'T DEAL WITH THE ENDING EITHER BUT IT'S BECAUSE I'M TOO BUSY CHOKING ON HOW RIGHT IT IS!
And speaking of Elodie, dear disco_vendetta please finish this book YESTERDAY so we can talk forever about Elodie possessing Sophie's body and them having arguments entirely in their shared head and upsetting each other with their choice in dude and how Elodie can't do or say anything unless she takes over Sophie's body and how Cal couldn't tell which was which but Archer couldn't stand to look at Elodie in Sophie's body AND HOW IT WAS PAINFUL FOR SOPHIE TO UNBIND THEM, COME AND TALK TO ME ABOUT THIS FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!!
ELODIE PARRIS, YOU GUYS. I was DELIGHTED when she made a couple of appearances in Demonglass, but she was EVERYWHERE in this one! SOPHIE ----> ARCHER ----> JENNA ----> ELODIE ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------> CAL, basically. [SORRY, CAL.] FYA picked Meaghan Martin for Elodie FOREVER AGO and it stuck with me permanently because of how fucking perfect it is - I don't visualize characters very well? Like I tend to disregard ACTUAL physical descriptions entirely and my brain just randomly assigns an impression to a character, and my impression for Archer is v. similar to Hunter Parrish but NOT Hunter Parrish at all, and Sophie just IS, and Jenna is maybe my friend Betsy [who I guess modeled in high school and then was MySpace famous when MySpace was a thing? ONE TIME I GOOGLED HER AND FOUND LIKE, DEVIANTART DRAWINGS OF BETSY AND BETSY PICSPAMS AND BETSY ICON POSTS] but not really either, I don't have clear visual pictures for any of them, but ELODIE IS MEAGHAN MARTIN in my head. It's so right! ELODIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE, WHO PROMISED THAT IF SHE DIED SHE'D HAUNT SOPHIE'S ASS, WHO WAS A BETTER PERSON IN DEATH THAN SHE WAS FOR MOST OF HER LIFE, WHO LIKES TO TAKE OVER SOPHIE'S BODY WHENEVER BITCHES NEED TO GET TOLD, WHO SOPHIE COULD NEVER HAVE SAVED THE WORLD WITHOUT. FORGET ARCHER AND JENNA AND CAL - they helped, but Elodie was instrumental, and then ALL SHE GOT IN THE END WAS CAL??????????? Kidding, that was mean, I actually thought her story was wrapped up pretty nicely, BUT NEVER ENOUGH CAL-BASHING!!! And SOPHIE IS HER FRIEND, OKAY? DON'T MAKE HER SAY IT AGAIN, JEEZ.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA CAL DIED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA SORRY I KNOW IT WAS NOBLE AND ALL BUT I HONESTLY DID BURST OUT LAUGHING WHEN THAT HAPPENED! SORRY CAL! BETTER LUCK NEXT TIME! SORRY YOU HAVE LITERALLY NOTHING IN YOUR LIFE OTHER THAN GRAYMALKIN ISLAND AND A GIRL WHO DOESN'T LOVE YOU BACK? YIKES!
EVERYTHING WAS FUCKING PERFECT! NGL when the first THIRD of the book was all Brannick shit I was like UHHHHHHHH IF THIS BOOK REALLY IS THE HEX HALL VERSION OF MOCKINGJAY I WILL KILL EVERYONE, ALSO PLEASE TELL ME ARCHER IS GOING TO SHOW UP SOON, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, I CAN'T DEAL WITH ANOTHER BOOK THAT HE'S BARELY IN, I CANNOT! And uhhhhhh then Lara had the same fucking idea, apparently, because she was like YEAH LET'S JUST MAGIC ALL OF THE IMPORTANT PEOPLE TO THE SAME PLACE AND LOCK THEM THERE TOGETHER SO THEY ALL HAVE TO HANG OUT ALL THE TIME AND MAKE OUT AT INAPPROPRIATE MOMENTS!
More importantly though after the end of Demonglass: EVERYONE IMPORTANT LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sorry, Cal.
SOPHIE'S DAD WAS OKAY!!!!!!!!!!!! [SOPHIE'S DAD WAS OKAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!] Guys, I was rereading Demonglass today and REMEMBER HOW FUCKING GREAT SOPHIE'S DAD IS? he just loves her so much and he's so happy to finally be in her life i can't i can't i can't
AND HE'S OKAY!!!!!! COVERED IN PURPLE TATTOOS BUT HE'S OKAY AND HE FUCKING CRIED WHEN HE GOT SOPHIE BACK AND HE AND SOPHIE'S MOM ARE BACK TOGETHER AND MAKING OUT ALL OVER THE PLACE LIKE THEIR NAMES ARE MERCER AND CROSS INSTEAD OF BRANNICK [!!!!!!] AND ATHERTON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SOPHIE'S OKAY AND ALL HER PEOPLE ARE OKAY! ARCHER'S OKAY! JENNA'S OKAY! VIX IS OKAY WHEREVER SHE IS! ELODIE'S SORT OF OKAY! Cal's dead. It's still funny.
I was SUPER worried that Sophie was going to lose her powers, since her demon blood was still linked to Lara and Anastasia and she was REVERSING ALL THE CASNOFF DEMONS, but nope! Everything was cool! SHE'S THE ONLY DEMON NOW, EVERYONE CAN FUCKING SUCK IT, AND THE NEW COUNCIL MADE HER THEIR BOSS EVEN THOUGH SHE'S ONLY SEVENTEEN BECAUSE SHE'S JUST THAT FUCKING AWESOME! But Sophie's like THANKS, GUYS, BUT NO THANKS, I'D LIKE TO GO BACK TO JUVIE FOR MONSTERS FOR A YEAR AND THEN GO TO COLLEGE! WITH MY VAMPIRE BEST FRIEND AND MY BOYFRIEND WHOSE FAKE NAME IS WAY BETTER THAN HIS REAL NAME! [Put "Daniel Anderson" on the list of NAMES I REFUSE TO ACKNOWLEDGE, right under ANDRE MICHAUX and ETIENNE!!!!!!]
REMEMBER HOW AFTER DEMONGLASS I WAS LIKE "ALL I WANT IN THE WORLD IS FIC ABOUT SOPHIE AND ARCHER GOING OFF THE GRID AND POSING AS HUMANS AT A NORMAL HIGH SCHOOL AND GOING TO PROM AND SHIT" AND IT'S NOT EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED, BUT WHAT HAPPENED WAS EVEN BETTER? Guys! They're all going to have a carefree senior year at Hex Hall where nobody dies and their main concern is DETENTION, aka Jenna is very concerned with NEVER GETTING IT because Archer and Sophie are always deliberately provoking the Vandy into giving them cellar duty and JENNA KNOWS WHAT THEY'RE DOING DOWN THERE, OKAY, AND SHE DOES NOT WANT TO BE SUBJECTED TO IT.
And then they're all going to graduate/get released from HH and GO TO MOTHERFUCKING NORMAL HUMAN COLLEGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Because where Sophie goes, SO GOES ARCHER'S NATION, and Jenna literally has ETERNITY ahead of her, why not do human youth stuff while she's still teenaged in every sense of the world? [Cal can't go to college with them because he's dead. Sorry, Cal!] FOUR YEARS OF SOPHIE AND JENNA AND ARCHER IN COLLEGE! Freshman year Sophie and Jenna are roommates; sophomore year Jenna lives at her sorority and Sophie and Archer have an apartment where they bang all the time, NATCH.
THESE BOOKS!!!!!!!! Rereading the first two I realized there are some passages that are never NOT going to explode my heart, like:
We'd laughed again, and Archer has just been a boy I liked, and I'd thought the only secret between us was just how much I liked him.
AND:
"This thing with us is the only real thing I've had in a long time. You're the only real thing."
AND NOW THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!
"Whatever's down there," Archer said after a moment, "it's hard-core enough that Casnoff went to all this trouble to hold it. Are you sure you want to do this, Mercer?"
"Of course I don't," I said, grabbing the iron ring affixed to the trap door. "But I'm gonna."
SOPHIE MERCER, YOU FUCKING WARRIOR YOU!!!!!!!! Ugh I love how Archer is the one who's been trained to deal with this shit ever since he was a BABY, he's an actual TEEN SOLDIER, but Sophie's the one who takes the lead always BECAUSE SHE'S SO GOOD AND STRONG AND WILLFUL!!!!!!!!!!!! SOPHIE MERCER! OR ATHERTON, OR BRANNICK, OR WHATEVER THE FUCK YOUR NAME IS! [THEIR NAMES AREN'T REALLY MERCER AND CROSS, NOT EVEN A LITTLE BIT!!!!!!!]
AND THEN THIS:
"Apparently I'm claustrophobic now. That's, uh, new. Probably a side effect of fleeing a burning building through an underground tunnel. Yay for psychological trauma."
"Come back up," Archer said automatically, and I kind of loved him for that.
I KIND OF LOVE THIS LINE FOR THAT! UUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH it is so great for SO MANY REASONS, like Archer is being reflexively but also calmly and rationally and casually protective, and Sophie KIND OF LOVES HIM FOR THAT BECAUSE LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE, but I love how the tone is almost a little condescending, if affectionately so? Like, she loves him for saying it, but bitch please: Sophie Mercer doesn't back down from anything, and she knows he knows it. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY: SOPHIE MERCER DOESN'T BACK DOWN FROM ANYTHING! SHE'S GOING TO GO FIRST AND JOKE ABOUT HOW IT'S BECAUSE OTHERWISE HE'LL JUST LOOK UP HER SKIRT [AND I WILL GET TO THE RETURN OF THE UNIFORMS LATER] BUT REALLY IT'S BECAUSE SOPHIE MERCER IS A FUCKING BADASS AND IT'S HER FUCKING DESTINY TO SAVE THE ENTIRE FUCKING WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! If Archer wants to help he's welcome to follow her into hell but LET'S BE CLEAR ON WHO IS DOING THE HEAVY LIFTING!!! NBD SHE'S JUST GOING TO GO TO THE UNDERWORLD BY HERSELF TO COLLECT SOME LITERALLY GOD DAMNED DEMONGLASS EVEN THOUGH IT BURNS HER HANDS! GLOVES? SOPHIA BRANNICK ATHERTON MERCER DOESN'T NEED ANY FUCKING GLOVES.
OKAY BUT RETURN OF THE UNIFORMS: Everyone getting sucked back to a nightmare version of Hex Hall was EVERYTHING I NEVER KNEW I WANTED. LOL at how Prodigium are the worst so instead of the Battle of Hogwarts we just had EVERYONE GETTING TURNED INTO DEMONS because they're terrible. IT'S COOL, THOUGH, BECAUSE SOPHIE AND HER CREW ARE AWESOME ENOUGH TO MAKE UP FOR ALL ONE HUNDRED OF THEM!!!! Everyone's just back in school and in their uniforms again! No big deal! The whole building is gross and mildewy now! The world is falling down around them! ALL SOPHIE AND ARCHER CARE ABOUT IS MAKING OUT ALL THE TIME! FUCKING PERFECT! EVERYTHING WAS FUCKING PERFECT!
AND ARCHER AND JENNA ARE BROS NOW! Ugh my favorite part of their new friendship was DEFINITELY him quietly apologizing to her in hell when they saw the Eye killing Amanda. SO GREAT! SO GREAT! Jenna and Archer as Sophie's platonic Ron and Hermione = my whole shit, basically. OF COURSE WE'RE STAYING AT HEX HALL WITH YOU, WHERE ELSE WOULD WE GO? OF COURSE WE'RE WALKING INTO HELL WITH YOU. ARCHER'S IN LOVE WITH HIS TENT AND FUCK IF JENNA'S GONNA LET YOU DIE BEFORE YOU CAN GET THOSE BFF BLOODSTONE NECKLACES MADE.
[SUPER sad about how the book ended with Archer completely cut off from the Eye, by the way. I was SUPER INTO that one fight he and Sophie had where he pointed out that she was able to trust the Brannicks because they were family, but the Eye was his family, which was SUCH A GOOD POINT, EXCELLENT DEBATING SKILLS, CROSS, but then he was wrong! Even the small faction that was willing to come and help him out turned out to be DUDES HE HAD JUST MIND CONTROLLED INTO HELPING HIM! ARCHER! I'M SO SORRY YOUR FAMILY DOESN'T LOVE YOU! SOPHIE LOVES YOU ENOUGH TO MAKE UP FOR ALL OF THEM AND I'M PRETTY SURE HER PARENTS WILL WELCOME YOU INTO THE FOLD SEEING HOW YOU VOLUNTEERED TO WALK INTO HELL WITH THEIR DAUGHTER AND ALL, ESPECIALLY SINCE THE FIANCE THEY PICKED OUT FOR HER IS DEAD. SORRY, CAL!
AND THE ENDING!!!!!!
"So really," said Jenna, and looped her arm through mine, "what more do you need?"
I looked back and forth between them, these two people I loved so much. The breeze ruffled the tall grass around the pond, and I thought I could hear Elodie's laugh.
"Nothing," I told them, squeezing both their hands. "Nothing."
LIKE I SAID, OPPOSITE OF MOCKINGJAY!!!!!! WHEN I FINISHED MOCKINGJAY I REMOVED THE FINAL FEW PAGES WITH A BOX CUTTER AND THEN FLUSHED THEM DOWN THE TOILET BECAUSE I DIDN'T KNOW HOW ELSE TO DEAL WITH THE AWFULNESS! HERE I CAN'T DEAL WITH THE ENDING EITHER BUT IT'S BECAUSE I'M TOO BUSY CHOKING ON HOW RIGHT IT IS!
And speaking of Elodie, dear disco_vendetta please finish this book YESTERDAY so we can talk forever about Elodie possessing Sophie's body and them having arguments entirely in their shared head and upsetting each other with their choice in dude and how Elodie can't do or say anything unless she takes over Sophie's body and how Cal couldn't tell which was which but Archer couldn't stand to look at Elodie in Sophie's body AND HOW IT WAS PAINFUL FOR SOPHIE TO UNBIND THEM, COME AND TALK TO ME ABOUT THIS FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!!
ELODIE PARRIS, YOU GUYS. I was DELIGHTED when she made a couple of appearances in Demonglass, but she was EVERYWHERE in this one! SOPHIE ----> ARCHER ----> JENNA ----> ELODIE ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------> CAL, basically. [SORRY, CAL.] FYA picked Meaghan Martin for Elodie FOREVER AGO and it stuck with me permanently because of how fucking perfect it is - I don't visualize characters very well? Like I tend to disregard ACTUAL physical descriptions entirely and my brain just randomly assigns an impression to a character, and my impression for Archer is v. similar to Hunter Parrish but NOT Hunter Parrish at all, and Sophie just IS, and Jenna is maybe my friend Betsy [who I guess modeled in high school and then was MySpace famous when MySpace was a thing? ONE TIME I GOOGLED HER AND FOUND LIKE, DEVIANTART DRAWINGS OF BETSY AND BETSY PICSPAMS AND BETSY ICON POSTS] but not really either, I don't have clear visual pictures for any of them, but ELODIE IS MEAGHAN MARTIN in my head. It's so right! ELODIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE, WHO PROMISED THAT IF SHE DIED SHE'D HAUNT SOPHIE'S ASS, WHO WAS A BETTER PERSON IN DEATH THAN SHE WAS FOR MOST OF HER LIFE, WHO LIKES TO TAKE OVER SOPHIE'S BODY WHENEVER BITCHES NEED TO GET TOLD, WHO SOPHIE COULD NEVER HAVE SAVED THE WORLD WITHOUT. FORGET ARCHER AND JENNA AND CAL - they helped, but Elodie was instrumental, and then ALL SHE GOT IN THE END WAS CAL??????????? Kidding, that was mean, I actually thought her story was wrapped up pretty nicely, BUT NEVER ENOUGH CAL-BASHING!!! And SOPHIE IS HER FRIEND, OKAY? DON'T MAKE HER SAY IT AGAIN, JEEZ.