Kiss Me-Chapter Twenty Five
Title: Kiss Me
Rating: PG/NC-17
Disclaimer: Don't know, don't own, never happened. Promise.
Summary: Ville and Bam go to school together. They're not friends. They don't even know each other. But when they both get roped into Romeo and Juliet, sparks fly!
Ville was sitting outside, on the grassy patch he always hung out on while watching Bam skate. He pulled his knees to his chin and hugged them there, unsure about what to do, what to say.
He had to tell the truth sometime, didn’t he? But did it have to be right now? Could he have one more weekend? One more time dancing with Bam? That was all he wanted.
But it won’t be the end of it, will it? There was a nasty voice, whispering in his ear. Perhaps he only thought it was nasty because it was saying things he didn’t want to hear, didn’t even want to think about.
He sighed deeply, aware of the scent and feeling of night closing in quickly around him. So deep was Ville in his own thoughts, he did not see Bam creeping up. The older boy was unaware of him until he felt him drop down onto the ground next to him.
“Ville, there’s something I have to tell you.” Bam said. He could feel his cheeks turning red, knew he was talking way too fast. He couldn’t help it. He simply had to say this before he lost his nerve.
“I know, Bam. I’ve got to tell you something, too.” Ville swallowed.
“Please, let me go first.” The words were flowing from the skater’s mouth with an ease he hadn’t expected.
“I really, really like you. I know I freaked out when you told me in the auditorium, but that was just because, you know, I thought I was straight. But I’m not now, straight I mean. I think I’m bi or something, or I’m at least Ville sexual.
And yeah, I know it sounds weird because I dated your sister. But Ville, you’re all I can think about. Every time I start to think about her, I start thinking about you, and I just can’t stop. It’s like… I don’t know, it just makes me feel crazy. And all those things I was saying in Romeo and Juliet, I really felt them! I really want to touch your face, to hear you speak. I think I’m in love with you.” Bam finally stopped and took a breath.
“Bam,” Ville breathed. Maybe he’d never have to tell Bam the truth! Perhaps he was going to ask him to tell Violet, request to meet her one last time at the club. Anything that was going to get him off the hook for this one.
Before he could think any further, Bam was bending forward. His lips were against Ville’s, and Ville was eagerly opening his mouth, desperate for more. How amazing was this? How long had he wanted a kiss from Bam while not having to pretend to be Violet?
Maybe now he could let Violet die, maybe now….
Bam suddenly broke off the kiss.
**
Strawberries and cream, with just a hint of bubblegum. That’s the way Ville tasted. That’s the same way Violet tasted when he kissed her at the club. There was a sinking feeling in his heart.
“Violet?” he whispered. Couldn’t it be, he tried to reason with himself, that maybe Violet was just playing with her make up, dressing up her brother? But… No. It just… It couldn’t be happening.
“Ville?” he whispered.
There was a stricken look in those emerald green eyes he had come to love so well, with and without make up. Suddenly, Bam remembered something about nail polish. He snatched Ville’s hands.
Oh God. No. The hands. He had been playing with his nail polish earlier. He painted his nails so frequently, trying to get a good effect going with the colors. He’d stripped it off with some remover.
His hands still smelled strongly of it. And, though you had to look closely, there was still some emerald colored polish in the corners of his nails. Though he was praying that the boy wouldn’t, Bam lifted the hands to his face and inhaled.
And then he saw the color.
“Oh my God!” Bam screamed. He threw the hands away from him as though they were deadly snakes.
“You lied to me.” He hissed, voice full of poison and misery.
“I didn’t mean to. Please believe me.” Ville begged. Anxiously, he reached out for this boy, the one person he had come to trust so fully, to love so well. Oh love? Was that what they were calling this sick game now? Was this love? Could it be anything else when he was willing to go to any lengths for him, to cover his face and dress in skirts?
“Why didn’t you TELL me?” Bam demanded.
“Because you wouldn’t have loved me then.” The long, pale throat worked as the green eyed one tried to swallow his misery.
“I don’t love you. I don’t love you at all.” Bam spat. “I loved Violet, and I loved the Ville I thought you were. I don’t love liars!” he shouted. Before the Finnish boy could reply, the younger one shot to his feet and raced inside.
“But Bam,” he said to the empty air. “I love you. Can’t you see that? I love you.”
***
“Hello?” a pleasant, female voice picked up the phone. Bam felt his heart rate slowing down, was able to catch his breath.
“Mom?”
“Bam? Honey, is something wrong?” leave it to April. He never had been able to hide anything from her.
“Mom,” much to his chagrin, tears began to fall on his cheeks. “Oh Mom, I really wish you were here.”
“Honey, tell me what happened.” She prompted. He heard a chair scraping along the floor and could almost picture his mother in the kitchen, sitting down at the table. Most likely she had been getting things ready for dinner. Bam could almost bet that she had a pile of vegetables in front of her now to chop up.
“I fell in love.”
“Okay,”
“With a girl, who wasn’t really a girl, she was a guy. And the guy that she really was goes to school with me, and then I fell in love with him, even though he said he was her brother, but really they were the same person. I realized I was in love with him, and I kissed him, and he tasted like her, so I found out that…” he trailed off, swallowing hard. There was no way she could make sense of this.
If nothing else, mothers are especially skilled in the art of forming coherent thoughts of babble. April paused for a second.
“Oh, sweetie, you must have felt so betrayed.”
There! That was the perfect word for it. Betrayed, he felt betrayed. And it was ripping his heart in two.
“Yes,” he dropped onto his bed, wiping away the hot tears on his cheeks with the back of his hand. “He betrayed me, Mom.”
“You still love him though, don’t you?”
“Yes,” he whimpered. How was it she could understand this so well? How could she know? Was it some sort of special thing that women were born with, something that got switched on when they had children?
That couldn’t be it. Lotus did it too. It must have been something that happened when they loved someone, anyone so much.
“I’m so sorry, Bam. I know that it hurts to love someone so much and have them smash your heart like that. It feels like they just ground your heart with the heel of their shoe. It’s miserable, isn’t it?”
“Yes.” Already he felt better. It was somewhat comforting to realize that he wasn’t the only one in the world who’d ever ached like this. There was a silence from April, and for some reason, it was nice just to have that.
When he had been upset at home, he had liked to go and sit in the kitchen with her while she made dinner. She would never ask him what the matter was, assuming he’d speak to her when he was ready.
Something about her presence was soothing in itself. Usually, he felt better just watching her move, listening to her hum under her breath. That was a habit she had, she was usually unaware that she was doing it.
“Mom?”
“Yes, baby?”
“Will it always hurt like this?”
April closed her eyes. Why couldn’t she have always stood between her son and heartache? Why couldn’t she have always protected him? She knew that you had to let children experience the world, but dammit, it hurt her too.
“No,” she said softly. “You won’t always feel this way. I promise.”
Rating: PG/NC-17
Disclaimer: Don't know, don't own, never happened. Promise.
Summary: Ville and Bam go to school together. They're not friends. They don't even know each other. But when they both get roped into Romeo and Juliet, sparks fly!
Ville was sitting outside, on the grassy patch he always hung out on while watching Bam skate. He pulled his knees to his chin and hugged them there, unsure about what to do, what to say.
He had to tell the truth sometime, didn’t he? But did it have to be right now? Could he have one more weekend? One more time dancing with Bam? That was all he wanted.
But it won’t be the end of it, will it? There was a nasty voice, whispering in his ear. Perhaps he only thought it was nasty because it was saying things he didn’t want to hear, didn’t even want to think about.
He sighed deeply, aware of the scent and feeling of night closing in quickly around him. So deep was Ville in his own thoughts, he did not see Bam creeping up. The older boy was unaware of him until he felt him drop down onto the ground next to him.
“Ville, there’s something I have to tell you.” Bam said. He could feel his cheeks turning red, knew he was talking way too fast. He couldn’t help it. He simply had to say this before he lost his nerve.
“I know, Bam. I’ve got to tell you something, too.” Ville swallowed.
“Please, let me go first.” The words were flowing from the skater’s mouth with an ease he hadn’t expected.
“I really, really like you. I know I freaked out when you told me in the auditorium, but that was just because, you know, I thought I was straight. But I’m not now, straight I mean. I think I’m bi or something, or I’m at least Ville sexual.
And yeah, I know it sounds weird because I dated your sister. But Ville, you’re all I can think about. Every time I start to think about her, I start thinking about you, and I just can’t stop. It’s like… I don’t know, it just makes me feel crazy. And all those things I was saying in Romeo and Juliet, I really felt them! I really want to touch your face, to hear you speak. I think I’m in love with you.” Bam finally stopped and took a breath.
“Bam,” Ville breathed. Maybe he’d never have to tell Bam the truth! Perhaps he was going to ask him to tell Violet, request to meet her one last time at the club. Anything that was going to get him off the hook for this one.
Before he could think any further, Bam was bending forward. His lips were against Ville’s, and Ville was eagerly opening his mouth, desperate for more. How amazing was this? How long had he wanted a kiss from Bam while not having to pretend to be Violet?
Maybe now he could let Violet die, maybe now….
Bam suddenly broke off the kiss.
**
Strawberries and cream, with just a hint of bubblegum. That’s the way Ville tasted. That’s the same way Violet tasted when he kissed her at the club. There was a sinking feeling in his heart.
“Violet?” he whispered. Couldn’t it be, he tried to reason with himself, that maybe Violet was just playing with her make up, dressing up her brother? But… No. It just… It couldn’t be happening.
“Ville?” he whispered.
There was a stricken look in those emerald green eyes he had come to love so well, with and without make up. Suddenly, Bam remembered something about nail polish. He snatched Ville’s hands.
Oh God. No. The hands. He had been playing with his nail polish earlier. He painted his nails so frequently, trying to get a good effect going with the colors. He’d stripped it off with some remover.
His hands still smelled strongly of it. And, though you had to look closely, there was still some emerald colored polish in the corners of his nails. Though he was praying that the boy wouldn’t, Bam lifted the hands to his face and inhaled.
And then he saw the color.
“Oh my God!” Bam screamed. He threw the hands away from him as though they were deadly snakes.
“You lied to me.” He hissed, voice full of poison and misery.
“I didn’t mean to. Please believe me.” Ville begged. Anxiously, he reached out for this boy, the one person he had come to trust so fully, to love so well. Oh love? Was that what they were calling this sick game now? Was this love? Could it be anything else when he was willing to go to any lengths for him, to cover his face and dress in skirts?
“Why didn’t you TELL me?” Bam demanded.
“Because you wouldn’t have loved me then.” The long, pale throat worked as the green eyed one tried to swallow his misery.
“I don’t love you. I don’t love you at all.” Bam spat. “I loved Violet, and I loved the Ville I thought you were. I don’t love liars!” he shouted. Before the Finnish boy could reply, the younger one shot to his feet and raced inside.
“But Bam,” he said to the empty air. “I love you. Can’t you see that? I love you.”
***
“Hello?” a pleasant, female voice picked up the phone. Bam felt his heart rate slowing down, was able to catch his breath.
“Mom?”
“Bam? Honey, is something wrong?” leave it to April. He never had been able to hide anything from her.
“Mom,” much to his chagrin, tears began to fall on his cheeks. “Oh Mom, I really wish you were here.”
“Honey, tell me what happened.” She prompted. He heard a chair scraping along the floor and could almost picture his mother in the kitchen, sitting down at the table. Most likely she had been getting things ready for dinner. Bam could almost bet that she had a pile of vegetables in front of her now to chop up.
“I fell in love.”
“Okay,”
“With a girl, who wasn’t really a girl, she was a guy. And the guy that she really was goes to school with me, and then I fell in love with him, even though he said he was her brother, but really they were the same person. I realized I was in love with him, and I kissed him, and he tasted like her, so I found out that…” he trailed off, swallowing hard. There was no way she could make sense of this.
If nothing else, mothers are especially skilled in the art of forming coherent thoughts of babble. April paused for a second.
“Oh, sweetie, you must have felt so betrayed.”
There! That was the perfect word for it. Betrayed, he felt betrayed. And it was ripping his heart in two.
“Yes,” he dropped onto his bed, wiping away the hot tears on his cheeks with the back of his hand. “He betrayed me, Mom.”
“You still love him though, don’t you?”
“Yes,” he whimpered. How was it she could understand this so well? How could she know? Was it some sort of special thing that women were born with, something that got switched on when they had children?
That couldn’t be it. Lotus did it too. It must have been something that happened when they loved someone, anyone so much.
“I’m so sorry, Bam. I know that it hurts to love someone so much and have them smash your heart like that. It feels like they just ground your heart with the heel of their shoe. It’s miserable, isn’t it?”
“Yes.” Already he felt better. It was somewhat comforting to realize that he wasn’t the only one in the world who’d ever ached like this. There was a silence from April, and for some reason, it was nice just to have that.
When he had been upset at home, he had liked to go and sit in the kitchen with her while she made dinner. She would never ask him what the matter was, assuming he’d speak to her when he was ready.
Something about her presence was soothing in itself. Usually, he felt better just watching her move, listening to her hum under her breath. That was a habit she had, she was usually unaware that she was doing it.
“Mom?”
“Yes, baby?”
“Will it always hurt like this?”
April closed her eyes. Why couldn’t she have always stood between her son and heartache? Why couldn’t she have always protected him? She knew that you had to let children experience the world, but dammit, it hurt her too.
“No,” she said softly. “You won’t always feel this way. I promise.”