I'm depressed. What's new.

I decided I just want to up and off of the computer. I'm gonna go wallow in my own self pity and beat myself up over everything that I can't control.

I am way pissed and I just want it to stop. Do you know how long it's been since the last time I cried for no good fucking reason? Quite a few months save for dreams that I really cannot help ( Read more... )

I usually only post on live journal when I'm sad or upset with no one left to talk to.
Anyone who reads my posts (that are available) knows this.

In an effort to be less negative all the time,
What do you think (if anyone is reading) about deleting my livejournal?
Would that help or hurt me?

I'm thrilled for the day I lose all sympathy for anyone who remotely gives a shit about me so I have the courage to kill myself.

I'm back home but I can't help but feel like I've been forgotten..... or like I don't belong anymore.
Did I become someone who no one wants to be around? It sure feels like that...
Or like everyone's life is progressing too quickly to bother keeping up with me.

I don't understand how people put up with life and it's trials ( Read more... )

I wish I could write in a way that creeps inside your chest and grabs your heart.
I want my words to go in through your mouth and find its way to your core, to make your heart stop when you've realized that everything else ceases to exist because of this feeling.

That's what music does to me.

I found this saying my Aunt put up, and it hit the nail on the head. I want it here for safe keeping because I think that it heavily applies to my situation ( Read more... )

Now I have to put up with my worst fear.
Yay. /sarcasm

I'm not even back in LA and I'm already not allowed to sleep.
Bummer.

I feel kind of empty today. Just a bit as if I've lost something really important in my life.
Hopefully that's not the case......