Fic: Paper Houses, chapters 3 & 4

[cloversworld]

Paper Houses 3&4/10
Uta no Prince-sama x La Corda d' Oro crossover
Jinguji Ren/Hijirikawa Masato, Tsuchiura Ryoutarou/Tsukimori Len
written for Small Fandoms Bang 2016 - round 5
written for Trope Bingo round 6, for the prompt/trope square 'marriage'

MASTER POST



chapters 1 & 2

3.

The enchanting rise and fall of the melody flowing across the corridor is what lures Ren to the room that serves as a den to several musical instruments. He finds his husband sitting in front of a baby grand, nimble fingers skipping over ebony and ivory keys with graceful dexterity.

Once Masato is done playing the piece, he drops his hands on his lap and says, "Can't you leave me alone for even a few hours?" without turning around.

Ren takes one of the chairs strategically arranged along the wall and sets it beside the piano bench, says, "Hey. You locked me out of our room last night so I had no choice but to sleep in one of the spare rooms down the hall," as he takes a seat. "So that would technically mean I did leave you alone for the entire night."

Masato sighs and finally swivels around to face him. "Are you going to be this difficult for the rest of the week?"

"Not unless you want me to." Ren leans over, hand gripping the edge of the bench so he can prop himself up while he brings his face close to Masato's. "Look, Masayan, I'm trying here. I'm really sorry I wasn't able to be home last Christmas and New Year. I know I have a lot to make up for, but how can I if you keep pushing me away?"

Masato doesn't pull back, Thank goodness, and he even looks straight into Ren's eyes when he says, "I just don't know if I should still believe in you, Ren."

There's a deep pool of hurt rippling in those dark blue orbs that makes Ren's heart ache knowing he's the reason for it. He lifts his free hand to stroke Masato's cheek with the back of his fingers. "I'm sorry. I've messed up big time, I know. But I promise you-"

"No Ren." Masato yanks his face away from his touch as if he's scorched. "No more promises."

Ren takes Masato's hand in his and tightens his grip when he senses Masato is about to flinch. "Then tell me what I need to do to fix this. To fix us."

"I just…" Masato chews on his bottom lip, eyes falling on their joined hands.

"There you are, Papa!" They both jump startled at the sudden intrusion. Their youngest son is standing by the open shoji door, tennis racket in hand. "I've been looking all over for you."

"What is it Hide-chan?" Ren asks, his fingers remain entwined with Masato's.

Hideaki lifts his racket and sets it on his shoulder, "You promised last night that we'll have a match so I can show you my new techniques. So come on."

Right. Ren did say something like that. He's tempted to tell Hideaki if they can postpone it until later, but Masato retracts his hand in silent warning and Ren knows he can't break another promise in front of his husband. He throws a reluctant glance at Masato. "We'll talk more later, okay?"

A cursory but assuring nod is what Masato offers in response. "Go on. You should spend more time with our children and you owe this to Hide. You weren't able to watch his match at the middle school national tournament."

"Of course." Ren brushes his lips against Masato's cheek in a chaste kiss then heaves an agitated breath before getting up on his feet. There seems to be a promise of pain ahead - lots of it. He pats his fourteen-year-old son on the head. "I'll go change."

"Awesome!" Hideaki exclaims then adds, "I'll wait for you at the court, Papa," as Ren takes one burdensome step after another away from the room.

Ren bids his time changing into a collared shirt, track pants and his running shoes, which may be inappropriate for the activity but heck, it's the only sporty pair he has with him. He plucks an elastic band out of his travel bag pocket then collects his thinning blond strands in the circle of his finger. His hair isn't as long as it had been during his idol days but still has extra length he can gather in a pony tail. Lastly, he grabs the tennis racket that Hideaki has left with him the night before after practically baiting him into agreeing to play a game or two.

Hideaki is doing practice swings when he arrives at the tennis court. His son seems to have warmed up already and Ren ponders on whether he should do the same but decides against it. This is just for fun, nothing short of a serious game. Besides, he has already done some running and stretching this morning so.

"Okay then," Ren says, claiming the opposite half of the court. "Show me what you've got, son."

A quizzical look is thrown his way and with a skeptic lour, Hideaki asks, "Aren't you even going to warm up, Papa?"

Ren responds with a dismissive wave. "Nah. I've done that already. Why don't you serve first?" He bends his knees lightly, hand curling around the handle of his racket, while he watches his son mosey toward the service line.

The form Hideaki takes is something Ren hasn't seen, but then again, when is the last time he'd watched Hideaki play? The ball is then tossed in the air and Hideaki swings his arm so fast, Ren is caught by surprise when the ball bounces off the ground and straight to his face.

Instinct kicks in and Ren's arm moves on its own, raising his racket right in time to block the round yellow green menace before it hits him. Once he's certain that the ball is rolling slowly on the ground, Ren stares at his son, completely thunderstruck. "What was that, Hide-chan?"

Seeing Hideaki's smug reaction when he says, "Twist serve," with a lopsided grin gives Ren the impression that he's looking at his younger self in the mirror. Masato often tells him how similar he and Hideaki are - ginger blonde hair, droopy blue eyes, surefooted and haughty attitude - and this is one proof that solidifies his husband's assertion.

"I bet that serve alone gives your opponents a hard time." Ren is still caught in awe over his son's display of skill that he fails to return the ball when Hideaki serves again. And again. And -

"Okay, I get it. That's really an impressive technique. But Hide-chan, can you give me a normal serve so that we can actually play?"

Hidden beneath the string of bouncy sniggers that comes spilling out of Hideaki's mouth is an unmistakable complacency that becomes more discernible when he says, "Sure, Papa," in that cocksure tone.

After their third game and apparently Ren's third loss, he can feel his muscles screaming and his lungs close to exploding. "Why don't we take a break?" he suggests in a laid-back manner to hide the fact he's reaching his limit.

"You're getting old, Papa." Hideaki drops on the bench at the side of the court, grabs a couple of bottled water and offers one to Ren.

"Thanks." Ren sinks beside his son and downs almost half the content of the liquid wonder. He's tempted to protest that he's not old, to point out that he's only in his early - erm, mid-forties, but Hideaki does have a point. Much as Ren tries to stay fit, he's not as agile as he used to be. He wonders if it would've been different should he have chosen sports over his inclination to music, which brings him to ask his son, "Aren't you really interested in music? Or in performing arts like your brother?"

Hideaki shrugs, takes a swig of his water before saying, "I like playing the sax and the piano and the violin as a hobby. But I do want to focus on tennis." His head is tilted when he adds, "Does that bother you?"

"Of course not," is Ren's immediate answer. Why would it bother him? He and Masato have both agreed to let their children choose their paths and will only intervene if it's anything that will harm them physically, mentally and spiritually. So far, they all seem to have made the right choices and have done nothing but make both of them proud. Guilt jumps at Ren when Masato's words, You owe this to Hide. You weren't able to watch his match at the middle school national tournament, invade his thoughts. "Listen, Hide-chan. I'm sorry I wasn't there during your nationals match. I did watch the video though. I can't believe you and your opponent went on a half hour tiebreak."

There's a wistful glint that sweeps past Hideaki's eyes when he says, "Yeah," and the curvature on his lips suggests that some memory is playing in his head. "I didn't particularly mind that you couldn't be there, Papa. It would've been embarrassing since you would have been the only parent there. Other than Mama, that is."

The thought of Masato watching with sheer enthusiasm, video camera in hand, propels Ren to guffaw loud enough to startle the birds out of the trees. "I guess you can't keep Mama away from something as monumental as that." He throws an arm over Hideaki's shoulders and pulls his son close. "He told me your school won the championship and couldn't stop talking about it for days."

Hideaki falls into a somewhat contemplative silence for a while. Then he clears his throat and says, "Papa? Are you and Mama alright?"

The question throws Ren off. There is no doubt his children would have noticed that he and Masato are having marital issues and he doesn't expect them to turn a blind eye either. "We have problems, yes. But I'm trying my hardest to fix it. So don't worry, okay?" He ruffles his son's hair, hoping that the gesture alone would chase any trepidation away.

Apprehension evidently lingers on Hideaki's face though. "So you're not getting a divorce like Ryu-nii says?"

"What? Your brother said that?" The mere thought of his marriage falling apart to the point of possible permanent separation brings unbearable foreboding in his heart. "No. No, Hide-chan. Not if I can help it."

*



*

White chiffon fabric falls gracefully over Mariko's body as she parades into the living room in her wedding gown. Seeing her looking so beautiful and so elegant rouses pure bliss to blossom in Masato's heart. Sometimes, he still finds it hard to accept the reality that his eldest child is all grown up and twenty-one and no longer a baby.

Mai seems to share his sentiments because she says, "You look absolutely gorgeous, Mari-chan," with obvious fondness then her eyes slide over to him. "She looks so much like you, Onichan-sama, except she has blond hair like Ren-niisan."

"I think she's a perfect mix of Hijirikawa-san and Jinguuji-san," Yumiko blurts out in an inflection reinforced with lucid honesty. "Do tell the modiste if there's anything you wish to change, Mariko-san."

Mariko shakes her head, says, "Oh no, this is fine," then peers into the full-length mirror and runs her hands over the curve of her hips. "It's perfect."

Tsukimori Len enters in a somewhat hurried gait but stills halfway through the room when his gaze lands on Mariko. "You look lovely, Mariko," he says with reverence, causing Mariko's cheek to turn rosy in color. Len then hands Yumiko a brochure, saying, "My friend, Yunoki-san, sent this. He says those are the flowers in season and he needs to know which ones we prefer so he can place the orders."

Yumiko barely turns a page when her assistant rushes in, saying, "Ueda-san, the cake samples are here."

Masato isn't sure whether it's by coincidence or by clear-cut intuition that Ryusei appears almost immediately after, just in time to try out the sweets.

"Where's Yusuke-nii and Tsuchiura-san?" Ryusei asks Mariko but it's Len who informs him that they have gone to the tailor for Yusuke's fitting.

Then he turns to Masato and asks, "And where is your husband?"

"Out in the tennis court," Masato says then an image of what could be happening right at that moment flashes in his mind. "Most probably being vanquished mercilessly by Hide."

"No he's not," Ryusei blurts, pausing mid-bite of what seems to be a piece of red velvet cake. "I saw him at the center garden, crawling up the stairs. Literally."

As if on cue, Hideaki skips inside with an impish grin and Masato asks, "What did you do to your father?" with an arduous effort to hide the grin threatening to break out on his face.

Hideaki flaunts his pearly white teeth, says, "He wanted to keep playing until he beats me. Which didn't happen. His fault for not warming up. I did tell him to," then picks up a piece of strawberry cake and pops it into his mouth.

Masato isn't sure whether he should be worried over his husband's unfortunate predicament or laugh at the ridiculousness of the situation. He chooses neither and decides to focus on the tasks at hand.

As soon as they're done, Masato makes a beeline to their bedroom where he finds Ren lying face down on their bed, shirtless. At least he has the decency to throw on his underwear. It seems he has just taken a shower, judging from how slightly wet his hair is.

"What happened to you?" Masato asks with a snort, sinking down on the edge of the mattress and keeping a fair distance between them. A shirtless Ren is never good for his self-control so he knows he has to keep his guard up at times like this.

Ren groans, says, "Hurts," and lifts his head to shift in an angle where Masato can see his face. "Hurts all over."

"Oh, you poor baby." Forgetting that there's a line he's drawn between them, Masato reaches out to touch Ren and feels that usual spine-tingling frisson at the tip of his fingers. He doesn't pull back though, he just can't. Before his mouth can even filter what his brain has supplied, he's already saying, "You want me to give you a massage?" and Masato thinks he might be possessed or something because his skin prickles at the thought of running his hands all over his husband.

One corner of Ren's mouth curls up, eyes slanting toward Masato when he drawls out, "Please?" in an intonation lascivious enough to send shivers all over Masato's body.

Throwing caution to the wind, Masato slides further onto the bed while lecturing Ren about the harm of not warming up before playing sports. His fingers dig into the taut muscles on Ren's shoulders hard enough to coax a distressed squawk out of his husband. Then Ren releases a prolonged whimper that does things… um, arousing things to Masato, which he shouldn't even be entertaining.

"I'll go get some oil." Masato crawls off the mattress then heads straight to the bathroom thinking that he's seen some bottles of massage oil on the counter the day before and when he gets there, he realizes there are several. Without looking much at the label, except that he can see it says essential massage oil, he grabs one and returns to his husband who doesn't seem like he has moved an inch. The only change is that he's completely naked now.

Like, What the heck?

"What took you so long?" There's a slight slur in Ren's speech that Masato wonders if he's still fully awake or slowly drifting off to lala land.

It will be to his advantage if Ren does fall asleep. Not that Masato is planning to leave him without giving the promised massage. Just that Masato can do the task without having to worry about… well, roaming hands and flirty come-ons.

Masato pours oil on his hand and the scent of sandalwood and a hint of vanilla and maybe jasmine shoots up his nostrils, making him feel lightheaded somehow. As soon as the oil warms on his palm, he spreads the thick liquid over Ren's back and once the skin is slick enough, he puts pressure on his husband's shoulder, feeling the hard flesh twitch.

Knowing what he needs to work on now, he moves to straddle his husband so he can use his body weight to add more pressure when needed. He starts with gentle strokes, working on softening those tight knots then pushing the heels of his palm against the stiff muscles. "This okay?"

Ren groans, the vibration coursing under Masato's skin. "Feels goooood," Ren says, drawing out the word 'good' in a sensual, provocative way that has Masato biting down on his lower lip. His hand may have stalled a bit because Ren's shoulder jerks, as if to tell Masato not to stop.

Once he deems the stiffness in Ren's shoulder has loosen, he leaves them in favor of sliding his palm over Ren's back, pressing on the spots that feel rigid to the touch, listening to Ren mutter, "There, right there," every so often, until he reaches the mounds of Ren's ass.

Masato knows touching them is totally unnecessary, because Ren can't be feeling any pain there unless he has fallen on his backside, which is likely but. Masato focuses on Ren's hips instead then rubs the small of Ren's back with his thumbs. He's trying to keep his attention away from the firm buttocks on display, trying (but failing miserably) not to drool over Ren's glistening tanned skin. But Masato's body betrays him. He can feel an irrepressible arousal coiling inside him.

"Your muscles are too hard," he says in his desperate attempt to stay focused on the task, using his knuckles now to knead on a particularly stiff area just above Ren's hipbone.

"Mhmm," Ren hums then he tilts his head and glances up at Masato with those drowsy eyes. "I see you are, too." His lips stretch into a conniving smirk. Masato should have taken that as a warning, should've gotten off Ren right that instant. But it's too late. He jolts at the sudden brush of Ren's butt against his growing erection.

"You pervert." Masato smacks Ren on his shoulder before sliding off him with the intention of fleeing but Ren grabs his wrist then uses his forearm to push himself up until he's propped on one elbow, his hard cock on display.

"And who's the one rubbing his cock on my butt?" Ren tugs him close and Masato hates himself for allowing him. "Besides, you were obviously seducing me since you just rubbed an aphrodisiac blend on my back."

"I… What?" Masato grabs the bottle of oil and only then does he read the label. Damn it! He almost chucks the vial across the room but Ren steals it then sets it on the table, away from Masato's destructive clutches.

Then Ren's hand is pressed behind his head, the other releasing his wrist and snaking around him until Masato feels them against his ass. He wants to push himself off, knows he shouldn't be falling into Ren's trap, but damn, his body has other plans and apparently, they are in Ren's favor.

When their mouths collide in a desperate and fervent kiss and he feels Ren's tongue sliding against his, what's left of Masato's steel conviction to keep a wall between him and his husband melts into a puddle.

Pride and dignity aside, Masato wants this, misses this and he wants Ren to touch him all over, to feel Ren's naked body rubbing against his, for Ren to just tear his clothes off.

As if Ren has read his mind, his fingers begin to work on the buttons of Masato's shirt, undoing each in a slow agonizing pace. Ren does have his own special way of driving Masato out of his mind.

Impatience isn't one of his best qualities and it rears its ugly head when Masato is pushed towards the edge. He rips his mouth off Ren, hisses, "Fuck!" and takes over undoing the freaking buttons until he's shrugging his shirt off.

"Eager, aren't we?" Ren says in a flirtatious undertone.

"Shut up." Masato crashes his lips against Ren's in a torrid manifestation of the sensual hunger that's been clawing inside him while trying to undo his own pants. Ren shoves his hands away though and finishes the job, this time in a swift and expertly executed manner.

Once he's completely nude, Ren flips them over until he's on his back and Ren's hovering above him, his lips slightly parted, eyes beguiling. "I missed you," Ren mutters before lowering his head to claim Masato's lips in a slow and gentle kiss, erasing the remaining disinclination lingering at the back of Masato's mind.

When Masato relaxes, Ren lowers himself, his cock hard against Masato's own. Then he starts grinding his hips, their cocks rubbing against each other and the friction is sending pinpricks of pleasure all over Masato's body, so good that his toes curl, fingers clinging on Ren's arm.

"Wait, Ren, wait," he says, trying to keep his husband steady. "Want more. Need you inside," spills out before Masato can string together a proper sentence in his head because Damn, he wants to feel all of Ren.

"Okay," Ren says a bit throatily, like he's nearly breathless, then his lips are on Masato's neck, kissing and biting and sucking, warm tongue sliding down to Masato's clavicle, to his chest, to his navel. Then he wraps a hand around Masato's cock, giving him a teasing tug before his mouth takes over and….

All his blood rushes up to his head, making Masato feel like his brain is about to combust.

Ren's mouth is as skillful as ever, sliding down to the hilt, taking all of Masato in, then pulling back and tightening his lips just below the head of Masato's cock while his finger is stroking Masato's entrance. The sensation is causing a current of chills to gush through his nerves.

Masato knows he won't last long, so he grabs Ren by the hair, says, "Don't, I'll come," but Ren doesn't stop. He bobs his head a few times before releasing him with a vulgar pop.

"Don't fight it, Masayan. I'll make you come as many times as you can," is all Ren says and then takes Masato's cock in his mouth again, sucking and licking and pressing the tip of his tongue on the slit that rends a sharp screech out of Masato. The whole shaft disappears in Ren's mouth, the muscles in that warm cavern stroking him as Ren sucks. Then Masato just can't take it anymore. Blood surges down south, his body and mind caught in a momentary suspension of time until the tide of orgasm hits him. And he's coming.

Masato is still floating on the cloud of pleasure when Ren gets off him. He watches his husband wipe cum off his chin with the back of his hand, the sly smirk back on his face. "I'll go get the lube," Ren declares and before Masato can point out that he didn't bring any, his husband is already marching over to the tansu. Ren pulls a drawer that Masato is certain doesn't hold any of his belongings and sprints back to the bed, lube in hand.

So you planned for this to happen? is what Masato wants to tell his husband, but he stomps on the thought and watches Ren pour the clear liquid on his fingers, waits for those same fingers to come prodding his entrance. One first, then two, sliding in and out of him and-

Lights explode right before his eyes, shivers streaming through his veins. "Fuck!" jumps out of his mouth before he can bite back the curse.

"Found it," Ren says, a victorious smile sitting on his lips. He keeps rubbing on Masato's sensitive spot, making him shudder, his cock hard again, throbbing in anticipation.

"Stop teasing," he manages in between panting, hips snapping against Ren's fingers. He can feel three inside him now and he's so, so ready that he grabs Ren's wrist. "Now Ren. I want you know."

Just as Ren is positioning his cock near Masato's entrance, logic nudges Masato out of his corporeal trance. He grabs Ren by the arm and says, "Use protection."

"What?" A frown mars Ren's forehead and his eyes bore into Masato's. "You're kidding, right? I'm clean, Masayan, I swear."

Trust has never been an issue with them. Until lately. And as much as Masato wants to believe Ren, he still clings on his cautious side so he glares at his husband and insists. "Protection or you can forget about it."

Ren grumbles in protest but he gets off Masato anyway and tramples back to the tansu, rummages through what Masato now assumes are Ren's personal effects and marches back with a few foils in hand. "Once I prove to you I'm clean, we're doing this bareback and I'm not going to let you rest," he says, working on record-breaking speed of getting a condom on, rubbing lube on his covered cock, and soon, he's pushing against Masato's tight ring of muscle, sliding inside with ease and Masato does his best to relax, thinking that maybe… maybe he should just let Ren fuck him without the damn thing.

Then Ren slams his hips against his with such force that spurs profanities to pour out of his mouth. "Damn it, Ren! A little warning next time."

"You're cursing a lot today," Ren says, purring against his ear. Masato realizes how right Ren is and hates his husband for always dragging him out of his comfort zone.

"Oh be quiet and just…." Masato is at a complete loss for words so he wriggles his hips, hoping Ren will get the message and just freaking move, to just fuck him already until they're both tired and boneless.

Ren doesn't disappoint. He starts pushing, his cock sliding in while his hips gyrate, resulting in a more mind-blowing friction. Then he's pulling out slow and languid before he slams back in. A few more thrusts and Ren is picking up pace, rocking with him in a steady rhythm, his hot mouth on Masato's once more, swallowing the moans that pulsates through his throat, then Ren's sucks his lower lip before he moves elsewhere, his tongue tracing Masato's jaw.

His skin sings at the sensation of Ren's cock moving inside him, every inch of him is on fire and he can feel pressure building up in his groin area. Ren's pounding into him faster now, grunting at every hard thrust. Masato peers up to see Ren's head tilted back, eyes barely open, lower lip wedged between his teeth. Ren is close, Masato can tell. And so is he.

Before he can grab his own cock, Ren's hand beats him to it and he's stroking him, fingers curled tightly around Masato's shaft. That and the feeling of Ren's erection rubbing inside him drives him to his peak then his whole body seizes for several titillating seconds before he's releasing, his cum warm on his belly, on his chest.

It doesn’t take long before Ren turns rigid, and Masato is still too sensitive that he can almost feel him emptying his load in the condom with a few shallow thrusts. Then Ren slumps on top of him, breathing heavily against his neck while he slips out and Masato watches him pluck the rubber off without getting up entirely, ties the open end and tosses it at the side - presumably at a nearby trash can.

"Give me ten minutes and we'll do that again," Ren announces in between hitched breaths and Masato is thinking, I just want to see you try, but chooses to simply grunt while stroking Ren's back. It doesn't take long before he hears Ren's soft snores and feels warm air blowing against the side of his neck.

* * * * *

4.

"So where's Asumi?" The question is thrown casually, in the middle of dribbling and running past him. Yusuke sends the ball into the basket before facing him. "I don't recall seeing her today."

Ryoutarou claims the abandoned ball and let it bounce between the ground and his hand. "I think she said she's going shopping or something." If he were to be honest, he hasn't been too focused on his girlfriend lately so whatever she told him earlier has failed to register in his mind. He only has Len to blame. His ex-husband has been stealing his attention ever since he arrived.

"Or something," Yusuke utters after several wordless minutes has passed, both of them lost in the game for a while. When the ball falls right into Yusuke's hands, he tucks it against his hip and he gapes at Ryoutarou, his mouth open as if the words are balancing on the tip of his tongue but refuse to spill.

"What?" Ryoutarou asks though he can already sense where this is going.

The folds of the skin between Yusuke's eyebrows deepen. "Do you really love her?"

Ryoutarou opts for a safe answer, one that won't lead to any potential complication so he coughs out, "I do," but his son is not so subtle in showing his doubt so Ryoutarou reconsiders. "At least I thought I did. I thought I was seriously in love with her until…."

His train of thought derails when the image of his ex-husband parades around his head. Unable to follow up, his phrase is left hanging that Yusuke prompts, "Until?"

Denial will be futile at this point so Ryoutarou heaves a sigh and braces himself for the truth he's about to hurl. Seeing Len again has indeed made him question his sincerity for Asumi. "Until I saw your mother again." He takes advantage of the distraction and steals the ball from Yusuke then tosses the ball in the basket, watches it roll around the ring before finally falling through the net.

The ball bounces to Yusuke's hand then he turns to Ryoutarou with a wicked grin. "Are you saying you're still in love with Tochan?"

With an attempt to hide behind a perfectly crafted lie, Ryoutarou starts to shake his head but Yusuke's raised eyebrow makes him backtrack and think, Argh! To hell with it! and says, "I missed him. I miss a lot of things about him, mostly his bitchy attitude, I guess," which draws out rich and crisp laughter out of Yusuke. He tries to steal the ball from Yusuke again but his son makes a sharp turn and drives for the basket.

"Should you really be engaging in such rough activity, Yusuke?" At the sound of Len's voice, Ryoutarou spins around to find his husband off to the side, arms crossed over his chest. "Your hands and fingers might get injured and you should know well that taking care of them is a priority for a violinist like yourself."

Ryoutarou can't fight the urge to roll his eyes. This has been an age old lecture that he's gotten tired of hearing. "Don't you think Yusuke's too old to be reprimanded like that, Len? Our son's already twenty-three and-"

"All the more reason why he should be cautious and avoid doing anything rash that may jeopardize his-" The words suddenly stop pouring out of Len's mouth and Len seems to hold his breath for a second or two before he exhales, shoulders sagging. "You know what? You're right. And that's what I find irritating with this whole situation. You are always right."

The cynicism in Len's tone is so sharp it pierces right through Ryoutarou's ego. "And what's that supposed to mean? Are you implying that-"

"Stop. Both of you." Yusuke steps forward, arms raised, one palm facing Ryoutarou and the other directed at Len. "Oyaji. Tochan. Please. I wish you'd find a way to talk without fighting."

Len fixes Yusuke with an apologetic look, says, "Sorry, Yusuke. I should have expected your father won't see my point," then spins on his heel and stomps inside the house.

What the-

Ryoutarou can feel the anger boiling in the pit of his stomach. The nerve of his ex-husband…. He stalks after Len, paying no mind to Yusuke who hollers, "Wait, Oyajj! Don't provoke Tochan any further," and catches up to Len at the rouka.

"Len!" he calls out, expecting his ex-husband to turn a deaf ear but is caught by surprise when Len actually halts and turns around, meeting his gaze head on. Len's eyes hold so much emotion that leaves Ryoutarou speechless, his anger dissipating. But then he recalls the deigning look Len gave him earlier, the offensive satire in his words and his ire flares up once more. "What was that back there? Are you trying to pick a fight?"

"No, Ryou." Len's gaze drops to the floor and it's in a voice only above whisper that he says, "You wouldn't understand. You never did."

Something breaks inside Ryoutarou. In all those times they've argued in the past, he has always regarded Len's condescending attitude with aggravation but he rarely - or maybe never did - considers what goes through Len's mind and heart, that maybe, maybe Len feels Ryoutarou has been refusing to see his way. Perhaps that was the reason why Len left.

Now Ryoutarou recognizes the tangible facet that has created a rift in their marriage. It's the misunderstanding and miscommunication that has broken the delicate bond they had. And it wasn't only Len's fault then, isn't Len's fault now, but also Ryoutarou's. He recalls what Hino Kahoko had once told him when he and Len were going through that painful divorce process: Everything works two ways in a marriage - love, trust, understanding, caring… everything. A couple should work together, not just one or the other.

All those thoughts sum up to a profound regret that weighs heavy in his chest. "I'm sorry," falls from Ryoutarou's lips and with quick, long strides he closes their distance then he grabs Len and smashes their mouths together.

Len starts to respond, melting further into the kiss, but reality must have caught up with him because he pushes Ryoutarou away. The perturbed expression that creeps into his face drills a hole at Ryoutarou's conscience. Len touches his lips, fingertips resting on the kiss-bruised surface when he asks, "What are you doing?" before dashing down the hallway.

Ryoutarou just stands there and watches Len disappear around the corner, heart hammering against his chest. Shit.

*



*

Len's been pacing in his room for the past couple of hours now, his mind filled with thoughts of Ryoutarou, of that damn kiss, of everything about his ex-husband.

His finger lingers on his lower lip and he curses inwardly when he remembers how he responded to the kiss earlier without second thought. He can still taste Ryoutarou, his ex-husband's scent clinging to his nose and he hates how he wants more of him.

Hiding in his room isn't clearly helping so Len braves to wander into the rouka, only for his legs to still when he makes the mistake of looking out the window and spies Ryoutarou and his girlfriend in the garden.

Damn it, damn it, damn it!

Len can't seem to tear his eyes away from the couple so he watches Asumi cling onto Ryoutarou's arm, stands on tiptoes and pecks Ryoutarou's cheek. Something awfully painful inflates in his chest.

"Never pegged you to be a voyeur, Tochan." The sound of Yusuke's voice gives Len a start that he spins so fast he could have had whiplash but seeing the Cheshire cat-like grin across his son's face disperses the consternation that has momentarily gripped his heart.

For a moment, Len feels the stab of embarrassment but then he has the sudden urge to jump into his defense so he says, "Oh, quit it. This isn't voyeurism, and I wasn't deliberately watching them. I just happened to look out the window-"

"And I just happen to show up at a bad time?" Yusuke folds his arms over his chest, the grin on his lips morphing into a soft smile. "I was just teasing Tochan. Can't help but be curious though." He gestures toward the couple in the garden with a brisk tilt of his head. "Do you feel a tinge of jealousy, even if it's just a little, seeing Oyaji with Asumi?"

"Of course not," springs out of Len's mouth but judging from the way Yusuke studies him with ostensible suspicion, he presumes he doesn't sound as convincing as he hopes. "Think whatever you want, Yusuke. But I'm over your father. In fact, I'm just as ready to move on as he had." The lie tastes bitter in his mouth and the mere acknowledgement that Ryoutarou has indeed moved on burns like acid in his throat.

"Tochan." Yusuke heaves a deep sigh, tucks his hands in his cardigan pockets and leans his shoulder against the wall right next to the window. "Are you sure you're being honest to yourself?" His son regards him with inquisitive and heedful eyes - Ryoutarou's eyes. "Do you still love Oyaji?"

Another string of repudiation is ready to stream out of him but something about Yusuke's intense gaze, as if he's reading Len's mind, weakens his obstinacy. His son is right. He hasn't been too honest with himself. Len breathes in before vomiting the sour-coated truth. "I do still love your father. But I don't think we can ever go back to how we used to. Past is past. He's moved on. It's time for me to do the same."

"You wouldn't know unless you try, Tochan." The hint of hopefulness in Yusuke's tone creates a crack on the crystal walls that Len has built around his heart.

Uncertainties start flooding him and Len just wants break away from all this at the moment so he can clear his head. "I'll uh… I think I could use a hot bath right now. Would you know if someone is using the onsen?"

"It's open to anyone, but it's just us here," Yusuke says as a blunt reminder. "Mariko, her brothers and her parents are out for a family dinner, so I'm guessing the men's side is free?"

Having some time alone is certainly appealing. Len leaves Yusuke with an unelaborated message of, "I might as well take advantage then," and heads back to his room to grab anything and everything he needs before proceeding to the hot spring area.

The bath is indeed empty, save for one worker who is drying the floor near the entrance. The worker lowers his head before Len, which he mirrors and he's soon left alone to enjoy the privacy. He strips off his clothes and steps under the shower, mind wandering to his ex-husband once more.

Where and when had their marriage gone wrong? It's the same question he's been asking himself for the past two years. Perhaps it's because they got married too young. Or maybe he had Hino Kahoko to hold accountable for everything. If she hadn't broken up with him during their last year in high school, then Ryoutarou wouldn't have gone to his house to comfort him and they wouldn't have ended up as close friends, and Len wouldn't have ended up falling for the big oaf.

But he did.

Deeming he has scrubbed down enough, Len moves toward the bath and lowers himself into the hot water, feeling its warmth seeping through his skin. His muscles relax at contact and Len finally feels at ease. He leans his head over the edge and closes his eyes, mind returning to his earlier journey down memory lane.

Back to how this convoluted story of his life started.

He and Ryoutarou were barely out of high school then, with rough plans for the future. Fate had other schemes though and even as Len had tried to put a distance between them, their paths were always crossing always intertwining, red thread tying them together, until he got pregnant.

Len has been so lost in thought that he's caught off guard when he senses someone getting into the water. His eyes spring open and he nearly jumps out when he saw Ryoutarou's naked form slowly inching towards him.

"Ryou. What are you-"

"I hope you don't mind if I join you." Ryoutarou is already sinking beside him even before he finishes that sentence and his back is pressed against the wall, head resting on the granite edge of the bath when he affirms, "This onsen's for everyone to use, anyway."

Any coherent reply fails to form as Len's eyes wander down his ex-husband's bare torso. Ryoutarou has always been in top shape, tanned skin stretching over taut muscles. Len unconsciously licks his lips and when he gets wind that he's been ogling, he wills his eyes to stray elsewhere.

Soft chuckles ripple out of Ryoutarou's mouth and when he says, "You don't look so bad yourself, Len," the embarrassing reality that Ryoutarou has been keenly aware Len's been watching smacks him across the head.

Len shuts his eyes once more and fills his mind with other thoughts that isn't related to his ex-husband. It works for about a minute until he hears the slosh of the water and feels hot breath against his face. He struggles to keep his eyes closed but they flutter open when he feels a finger sliding down his cheek.

"You've been avoiding me," Ryoutarou breathes out in a whisper, the proximity making Len's body tremble. Ryoutarou's too close. Too close!

His instinct is to play ignorant so Len says, "What makes you think that?" and anything else he wishes to utter is hindered by Ryoutarou's finger on his lips.

"No more lies, Len." Bare sincerity and honest longing radiate off of Ryoutarou's hazel eyes that Len suddenly finds it hard to breathe. He watches Ryoutarou's lips move but the ringing in his ears makes it difficult for him to understand what his ex-husband is saying.

The next thing he knows is Ryoutarou's mouth is on his, his hand gliding down Len's chest and into the water and-

His mind shuts off and Len's not able to think anymore. They're in a public bath and a small part of his consciousness knows they shouldn't be doing this here. It's unethical and someone can see but Ryoutarou's grip on his cock throws all logic aside, etiquette and hygiene be damned.

Ryoutarou's mouth slides down to his jaw, teeth nibbling on every inch of skin. Then Len feels warm tongue gliding down his neck. His arms seem to have a life of their own, coiling over Ryoutarou's shoulders, fingers digging into the muscles on his ex-husband's back.

"What the hell?" The female voice registers a little too late and by the time Len is jolted back to reality, he sees the dark-haired figure of Asumi storming out of the bath area.

Stunned with the venomous sting of guilt, Len shoves Ryoutarou off him then wraps his arms over his chest as if this will help hide his sudden discomfiture. "Damn it, Ryou." When Ryoutarou makes no move to leave, he adds, "Shouldn't you be running after her?"

Ryoutarou doesn't budge, his burning gaze locked on Len. After what seems like a lifetime, he draws in a deep breath, his chest rising and falling. "Between us, I'm probably the more hypocrite one to believe I'm over you," is all he says before climbing out of the bath and heading out to the changing area.

chapters 5 & 6