history is repeating itself...lessons not learned?

[cindylouwho88]

You ever feel like the hamster on the wheel?  That no matter how hard you try to go forward, you're stuck in a perpetual state of motion with no accomplishment?  I have been feeling like that.  Back in March, after my trip to Utah, I felt like I had done a lot of healing around my grief.  I mean, I'll carry it until I die, but the load got lighter

Comments

[grail76]

Hug.

Deep breath.

Things tend to work out over time. This is a good thing to believe because it gives you ongoing hope, which we all need.

[cindylouwho88]

thanks J. Breathing :)

[khall]

Not all boys are all that messed up. I like a girl to just let me know she is interested. No games necessary. I don't need to chase. And the easier she is to catch, the more time we can spend developing a connection and energy. Sounds like he's got issues.

K.

[cindylouwho88]

It's become a pretty familiar refrain honestly. I am nothing if not authentic and vocal about being "interested". They run in the other direction. Or just stop calling. But you're right, I'm sure he does have issues. You know the joke about a "10" can date whoever she wants, but a 5 or a 6 need to date their own. He intimated more than once that he thought I was "above" him in the looks department. I think he thought something was wrong with ME cause I wanted to be with him. *shrug*

[alisha_stiletto]

Sending you hugs

[cindylouwho88]

Thanks A, I don't have enough women close to me that have done both sides of the proverbial fence. And you're right, I am generalizing, it just feels so familiar, like I've been here before and didn't get what I was supposed to get the first time. Ah well, thanks for the hugs, right back attcha girl! You got a shit ton of stuff going on, balancing way more than I'd ever take on! YOU ARE A ROCK STAR~

[alisha_stiletto]

You're welcome. Yep, sometimes I feel like Im one of the very few who have done both sides of that fence (lol) - however, the more I talk to people, the more I learn thats not really the case. *This is where I do not get into the whole shaming aspect of all of this. Im sure you can imagine how well I've been received after The Great Crossing of the Street. LOL

Anyway, I hope things get better for you soon, and I hope you find someone amazing that you can just enjoy yourself with.

And thanks for your words. I by no means am a rockstar. There are days where I'm barely getting by. Trust me. LOL

[cindylouwho88]

OH and you're icon there gave me an idea the other day and I took probably one of my most favorite "selfies" ever :)

[alphaloria]

When I did Dateapalooza 2010, I learned a lot about myself, my social conditioning, how I connected (or didn't) connect to men and how it was different from my relationships with women.

Ultimately, I found someone I just clicked with. And neither one of us had to be aggressive because we just naturally fell into a commitment. So really all of my overthinking how to "be" around men was a waste of time because connection makes all the difference.

Good luck with your new dude :)

[cindylouwho88]

HA thanks. I appreciate the response. Sometimes I have to step back and re-evaluate my purpose. Am I just lonely? What is it that I'm really looking for? I am hopeful the Universe knows what it's doing and will send along the right someone for ME :)

[steven]

He's 16 years younger than me and is a Brit.

Wait, this is a problem?

[cindylouwho88]

hehehe. yeah, you're right :)