Not ready yet

[ceitfianna]

Tomorrow I'm going to the memorial of a woman who was basically an adopted aunt. I have all these words I want to say about her and I don't know where to start. I keep looking back at my life and seeing her thumbprints in terms of being thoughtful, loving and teaching

Comments

[dodger_sister]

I'm so sorry, darling. I remember you telling me when she started falling and having troubles and how upsetting that was for you to see her like that, given that she was always such a strong presence in any room or conversation she was involved in. You don't know if you're ready to not have her be somewhere, but the thing is..she is somewhere. You are proof of that. If she left her thumbprints in your life, you can be assured she did in others as well. If she passed down knowledge and wisdom to you, you can be assured she did to others as well.
As cheesy as it sounds, she is somewhere - she's in you. And what she gave to you in knowledge and life, you give to others, so in a sense, she's in the life of every person you've touched online, in rp, fandom, at the library. Take comfort in that.

Hang in there, grief comes in waves, as you know. And send my love to your parents as well.

[ceitfianna]

Thank you, the memorial and reception after were amazing for all the people that were touched by her. There was a Quaker meeting and I found the words to speak about her and it was powerful. And now doors are opening in terms of an in person interview in Maryland and a school who's curious about me. I know she'd approve but definitely waves.