Daniel Charleton University, Part 3
At long last (has it really been 8 months?), I have more of my WIP.
Title: Daniel Charleton University
Summary: AU. No superpowers, no saving the world from alien invasion. Just a college, students, and one young man's attempts to win his clueless classmate's affections. In this chapter, Michael becomes less clueless and angsts.
Rating: G (so far)
Word count: 3424
Part 1 Part 2
Part 3
“Welcome to Egyptian Archeology,” the professor said, surveying the classroom. “I’m Dr. Daniel Garrett.” He walked to the nearest desk and handed the student a stack of papers. “Take one and pass it back. These are your syllabi.” He walked back to the center of the room and faced the class. “Most of you are probably wondering who I am and what I’m doing here. Dr. Hall was supposed to be teaching this course, but he recently met the love of his life and they eloped over the semester break. He informed the school he was overdue for a sabbatical and he was taking it now. He and his new wife are currently honeymooning in Cairo and working on a dig there.” Garrett smiled. “I understand this news caused some disturbance among the college administers. None of them can understand why someone would spend their honeymoon digging in the dirt.” There were chuckles from the class. “One of my friends from the department called to say they’d juggled schedules enough to cover all of Hall’s class except one, and could I please help out. I was moved by his desperate begging. So,” he spread his arms, “you lucky students are the only ones who have to put up with me.”
“This is fantastic,” Michael whispered to Ted. “Dr. Garrett is the best. If the college had announced he was teaching before registration, the class would have been full before we signed up. I bet once word gets out, a lot of people try to get in.”
Ted smiled and tried to hide his nervousness. This was a 300-level class, and it had taken some fast talking for him to get in without any of the prerequisites, and then it was only because the class was half-empty. Ted had been taking a chance with his GPA by signing up, but Dr. Hall was supposed to be an easy grader. Now “the best in the field” was teaching, and Ted doubted he’d have much patience for a student who was more interested in a fellow classmate than the class itself. He briefly considered dropping, but a glance at Michael’s excited, happy face changed his mind. He’d sacrifice more than his GPA to see Michael so happy.
That didn’t mean he’d let his GPA go without a fight though. Ted focused on Dr. Garrett, determined to keep up. Mostly keep up. He wouldn’t mind a little private tutoring from Michael.
~~~~
Ted frowned at the monitor, tapping his lips. Two weeks into the semester, and he already had a paper due. Egyptian Archeology was proving much more difficult than he’d expected. Much more interesting too. It was his favorite class, and Mike was only part of the reason. Dr. Garrett was fascinating, and if Ted wasn’t already completely wrapped up in all things Mike, he’d probably have a crush on the older man. He suspected Mike did have a crush on their professor, but was confident enough not to feel threatened by the hero-worship in his friend’s eyes every time he looked at or spoke about Dr. Garrett. If nothing else, Michael was too shy to act on it and too repressed to even acknowledge the feelings to himself.
To Ted’s surprise, Dr. Garrett had warmed to him immediately. He’d been impressed by a student taking a class so outside his major, and teased that they’d convert Ted yet. He’d offered to give Ted any additional help he might need, but warned he would not grade Ted easier just because he didn’t have the same background in the subject as the other students. Ted was determined to do well, and was happy that at least his writing skills were decent. He’d seen some of the essays written by his fellow would-be engineers, and had realized that the nearly-incomprehensible gibberish found in some technical manuals may not be a translation problem at all. He’d also learned that many of his fellow students did not take criticism well. There was a reason he didn’t have any science-major friends.
Ted glanced at the computer’s clock and hurriedly saved his work. It was time to meet Michael at the library for their usual study date.
One of these days he really should tell Michael it was a date.
~~~~
“Hey-ya, Boost.” Guy slapped Michael on the back and fell into step beside him. “Headed to the library again?”
“Yeah, Ted’s going to help me study for my calc test.”
“Don’t take this the wrong way, but if you keep hanging out with that queer, people are going to talk.”
Michael looked puzzled. “What queer?”
Guy rolled his eyes. “How many do you know?”
“None?”
Guy gaped at him. “Are you majoring in cluelessness? Kord! He practically licks his lips every time you bend over.”
“I can’t see his lips when I’m bent over,” Michael snapped, then frowned. “Ted’s gay? Are you sure?”
“He’s treasurer of the gay pride group, isn’t he?”
“They do let non-gays in. It’s about equality.”
Guy waved that off. “Whatever. He wears tights.”
“For gymnastics!”
“He ogles men. He ogles you.”
Michael had no retort. “I’ve never noticed,” he whispered.
Guy slapped him on the back. “Then you’re probably safe. If he wanted to make a move on you, he’d have mentioned it by now. Although how you never noticed,” Guy shook his head in baffled wonderment. “You really are oblivious.”
“Yeah,” Michael agreed, subdued.
“I gotta go. I’m meeting Tora in a few minutes.” Guy smirked and smoothed his hair. “Bea’s got a class for the next hour,” he gloated. “We’ll have the room to ourselves.”
“Have fun,” Mike said, and watched Guy saunter off before trudging to the library.
Ted was gay? And he’d been checking out Michael? Michael wasn’t sure he believed it. Ted was nice. He’d never tried to put a move on him. Even if he were gay, that didn’t mean he was attracted to Michael. But why hadn’t he told Michael?
Confused and distracted, Michael made his way to the library. Ted was already there. He smiled warmly at Michael. Michael promptly forgot the round-about speech he’d planned and blurted out “You’re gay.”
Ted frowned in confusion. “Ye-es?”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Michael dropped into a seat across from Ted, lowering his voice before the other students in the library got curious.
“I didn’t know I needed to. You didn’t know?”
“Guy had to tell me.”
Ted snickered. “How did you miss it? I’m not exactly subtle.”
“What do you mean? You act like a normal guy.”
Ted glared. “I am attracted to men. I flirt with men. I date men. I have sex with men. Believe it or not, that’s more than enough to meet the requirements. There are more choices than ‘in the closet’ or ‘flaming.’ I don’t go shopping and say, ‘I’ll buy that shirt, because I’m gay,’ or ‘I can’t wear that, it makes me look straight.’ I have a life and personality outside my sexual orientation.”
Michael stared at the table. “I guess.”
Ted bit his lip. “Mike?” He leaned over and stretched out a hand. When he touched Michael’s shoulder, Michael flinched and drew back.
“I have to go. Sorry.” He grabbed his bookbag and hurried to the exit. Ted watched him go, feeling sick.
“Ted?”
Ted started and turned to see Babs standing next to him. “Hey.”
“You okay?”
Ted nodded and stood. “Yeah. Fine. It’s nothing.”
“It didn’t look like nothing.” She hugged him. “Whatever it was, he’ll come around. It’ll take more than a disagreement to ruin your friendship.”
Ted hugged her back, wishing, for the first time in years, that he could be ecstatic about a curvy redhead pressed up against him. If he were straight, there’d be no chance of losing Mike. “I hope so.”
~~~~
Michael closed the textbook in frustration. Half an hour of studying, and he couldn’t even remember which dynasty the chapter was on.
Ted was gay. Everyone knew it but him. It was obvious. Except not, because Ted wasn’t defined by his sexuality. Mike tried to think of the clues everyone but him saw. Okay, there was the gay pride group. And a lot of Ted’s and his friends’ jokes made more sense now. But Mike was certain he’d never seen Ted checking out a guy. He’d also never seen him checking out a girl, but Michael didn’t check out girls either, so that wasn’t proof of anything. The girls were all very comfortable with Ted; they were always touching him and flirting. He supposed that was a sign. Girls seemed to like gay guys. His sister had once told him it was because they were safe.
He’d never seen Ted with a guy. Sure, he had male friends, but no boyfriends. He didn’t flirt with other guys. Ralph was comfortable rooming with him, and while Sue sometimes warned Ted to keep his hands to himself, it was always teasing.
Maybe Ted, like Mike, had decided to focus on academics? That would explain the lack of dating and the eagerness to study.
Michael flopped down on his bed. He’d overreacted this afternoon. It wasn’t like he cared. He knew other gay people. He’d just been surprised. And he’d never really been friends with a gay man before. He’d never really been friends with anyone.
He wanted to talk to someone about all this. Normally he’d talk to Ted, but that wouldn’t work until he sorted things out in his head. All of Ted’s friends would take Ted’s side. Guy wasn’t exactly Mr. Sensitive. Maybe Scott would listen? Scott was pretty open-minded, and friendly and supportive, and he wasn’t part of Ted’s circle. Scott and Michael weren’t close, but they’d lived together for two years now, and got along okay. Michael listened after Scott and Barda fought, so Scott owed him.
Michael opened his textbook again, trying to study until Scott got back. He’d almost managed to concentrate when the door opened and Scott and Barda spilled in, giggling and fumbling with each other. “Oh,” Barda said, seeing Michael. She pushed Scott away and scowled. Scott turned and looked surprised to see Michael.
“Hey. I thought you were at the library.”
“Yeah, something came up.” Michael looked at them, Barda clearly annoyed and Scott trying to hide his disappointment, and gave up any hope of a heart-to-heart talk. He closed his textbook and stood. “Sorry. Didn’t realize you’d want the room. I’ll go study downstairs.”
Scott smiled. “Thanks, Mike.”
“Yeah. Anytime.”
~~~~
Michael shifted his feet and took a deep breath before knocking. He was being silly. Tora wouldn’t tell Guy. At least, not the specifics. Bea wouldn’t tell to John. Or she might, but John wouldn’t kill him for being confused. John wouldn’t tell Ted. Guy wouldn’t kill him for visiting his girlfriend’s room. Michael almost bolted at that last thought, but it was too late. The door opened, and Tora smiled at him. “Hello, Michael. Are you looking for Guy?”
“No. Is he here?”
Tora opened the door wider and took his hand, pulling him inside. “He left about ten minutes ago. If you aren’t looking for him, why did you ask?”
Bea was sitting at her desk, doing homework and listening to music. She looked up as Michael entered.
“I don’t want to talk to him. I want to talk to you.” Bea raised an eyebrow at that, pulling out her earbuds. She sized him up for a moment, then nodded.
“You are nicer than Guy. Much better for Tora than that lout.”
“Bea! Guy is really a sweet person. And I’m sure Michael isn’t trying to steal me from Guy.” She giggled at that.
“No! Definitely no! Please don’t even joke about that where Guy could hear!”
“You do not like Tora?” Bea stood, her high heels making her almost eye-level with Michael, and advanced on him. Michael stepped back, but Tora had already closed the door, and his escape was cut off.
“Bea, stop it,” Tora scolded. “Would you like to sit down, Michael?”
Michael glanced around the room and sat on the chair at the other desk, not daring to touch the beds. “I need to talk to someone,” he blurted, “and there’s no one else I can talk to.”
“Why not Ted?” Tora asked. “You two are close.”
“It’s about Ted.” Michael took a deep breath and explained everything. Bea laughed when Michael said he hadn’t known Ted was gay, but a glare from Tora kept her quiet after that. Michael hadn’t meant to tell everything in front of Bea, but once he started he couldn’t stop, trying to put into words his confusion and feelings of betrayal. Tora perched on the edge of her bed and took his hands, squeezing them reassuringly.
When he’d finished, Tora stood and hugged him. “Is that everything?”
“I think so,” Michael said, sniffing but most decidedly not crying. It was probably allergies.
“You are an idiot,” Bea announced. “Ted is nice, and your friend. He has always been gay, just as Dinah has always been a brunette and you have always had 20/20 vision. Nothing has changed except that now you know.”
“You have 20/20 vision?” Tora asked, while Michael reevaluated his belief that John wouldn’t spill secrets. He mentally filed away the “Dinah’s a brunette” for later.
“Yes,” Bea answered, “the glasses are a prop. Sue told me.”
John was safe. Sue was not. Michael was glad he hadn’t gone to her.
“I don’t understand why you are upset. You should be happy,” Bea insisted.
Michael furrowed his brow. “Because my friend is comfortable with himself and has made a decision he is happy with?”
Bea rolled her eyes. “Because now you know he is gay too. You can date.”
“What? I’m not gay!”
Tora shushed him, glaring at Bea. “Don’t mind Bea. She’s just teasing.”
“You’re not gay?” She frowned. “Guy was right? Are you sure this isn’t a sign of the end of the world?”
“Guy said he thought Ted was checking me out,” Michael whispered, worried that he’d said something to give both Ted and Bea the wrong impression.
Bea waved his comment aside. “So? Lots of people check you out. I have.”
“What?” There really should be a daily limit on shocking revelations.
“You are attractive. At least an eight, maybe a nine if you dressed up. You are also intelligent, funny, and non-threatening. Lots of girls find you appealing.”
Michael stood, edging towards the door. “I should go now.”
Bea stood and followed him. “This is what I meant by non-threatening. You are adorably vulnerable.”
“What about John?” Michael asked desperately.
Bea rolled her eyes. “I said you were good-looking, not that I was desperately in love with you. That’s my point. People like to look at you. This does not mean they are going to drag you off into a closet and do naughty things to you.” She cocked her head, considering. “Well, Sue might, if she weren’t so involved in Ralph. And what’s-his-name, the Olympic guy, he would if it weren’t for his girlfriend. I suppose I might, if I just wanted an itch scratched. Ted probably would too, if he got the chance. But so long as we all have boyfriends, you’re safe.”
“Ted doesn’t have a boyfriend,” Michael pointed out.
Bea shrugged. “Mostly safe.”
“Bea, you’re scaring him.” Tora pushed past Bea and rested a hand on Michael’s arm. “What Bea is trying to say is that you are very handsome, and people notice that, but that doesn’t mean they want to pursue a relationship with you. They just like looking at you.”
“Great,” Mike muttered, turning to leave. “Now I’m artwork and gay.” He trudged down the hall, and feeling just as miserable and confused as he had before the talk with Tora. “I thought talking things out and unburdening yourself was supposed to help,” he grumbled. Once outside the girls’ dorm, he stopped and looked around. He couldn’t go back to his room yet, the library seemed very unwelcoming at the moment, and he still wasn’t ready to face Ted. He thought about heading to the gym for a work-out, but then he remembered some of the comments he’d never paid much attention to before-from men and women-during his previous work-outs, and didn’t think he could stand being ogled right now.
He still wanted to talk, hopefully to someone who was better at things than Bea was. Sighing, he turned and headed towards John’s dorm. Between Bea and Ted, John would hear about things soon enough anyway. Maybe the psych major could fix him.
~~~~
“You don’t need fixing,” John said after Mike had finished his story.
“That’s helpful,” Mike grumbled, slouched on the floor against the bed. John was sitting cross-legged across from him, strangely stiff in spite of the informal seating arrangements.
“Your reactions are normal. Textbook even,” John assured him. “There’s nothing wrong with you.”
Mike sighed, relieved that at least someone thought so. “Then why do I feel so wrong?”
“Because your environment, or at least your perception of it, has changed and you have not adjusted yet. That doesn’t mean you are flawed in some way. You just need to adapt.”
“How?” Mike asked, hating how close to whining he sounded. Fix this and make it better, make it how it was, he wanted to say.
“Let’s break this down and look at it rationally,” John suggested. “What bothers you the most: homosexuality, your friend’s homosexuality, or that you found out about it through a third party?”
“The last one, I guess,” Mike said. “I mean, Ted being gay is weird, but I don’t have any problems with homosexuality in general.”
“But it’s weird?”
Mike frowned. “I didn’t say that. Okay, I did, but that’s not what I meant.” He fumbled for the words. “He’s Ted, you know? He’s not supposed to be…” he trailed off, looking for words that didn’t sound homophobic. He didn’t care that there were gay people, he just cared that Ted was gay. It was different.
“Homosexuality is the Other,” John intoned. “It is normal to fear what is different and strange. From humankind’s earliest days, we have stayed close to the family unit, the people and places we know, and avoided or waged war on those different from us.”
“I don’t want to avoid or fight gay people,” Mike insisted.
“Of course not,” John agreed. “But they are Other. Ted isn’t. He’s your friend. He’s familiar and safe, and suddenly you learned he wasn’t. You feel threatened and confused, and it was only made worse because it came from an unexpected source.”
Mike nodded. “Yes! He’s Ted. He’s not supposed to be gay or checking me out.”
John raised an eyebrow. “He checked you out?”
Mike shrugged. “That’s what Guy said. And Bea thought I was gay and wanted to date Ted. And…” Mike trailed off, thinking. “He does, doesn’t he? He flirts. I am such an idiot.”
John sighed. “I warned him,” he muttered, but Mike heard.
“You knew! Does everyone know?”
John looked at Mike, his face expressionless except for one small wrinkle between his eyebrows, and Mike couldn’t read faces well enough to know if it was worry or confusion or annoyance, or just squinting because the light was too bright. “I’m not the one who should be telling you this.”
“No, Ted is, but he hasn’t, and I’m already getting it from everyone else. I could just ask Ralph or Sue or anyone, I bet. You at least won’t exaggerate.”
John nodded. “I won’t reveal things he told me in confidence, but what is common knowledge is safe, I suppose. Ted finds you attractive. He likes you, a lot. He hid it because he values your friendship and did not want to risk damaging it. I doubt he intended to hide his homosexuality though. While he does not allow it to define him solely, and thankfully avoids the more irritating stereotypes, he has never hid it. His friends all know, and we do mention it from time to time. I suspect you have begun to remember certain comments that allude to Ted’s preferences?” Mike nodded. “It never occurred to any of us that you did not know, or we would have told you. We are used to everyone knowing, and so see no reason to be explicit about it.”
“I guess.” Mike leaned up against the wall. “He likes me?”
“You should talk to him,” was the only answer John would give.
TBC
Part 4
Title: Daniel Charleton University
Summary: AU. No superpowers, no saving the world from alien invasion. Just a college, students, and one young man's attempts to win his clueless classmate's affections. In this chapter, Michael becomes less clueless and angsts.
Rating: G (so far)
Word count: 3424
Part 1 Part 2
Part 3
“Welcome to Egyptian Archeology,” the professor said, surveying the classroom. “I’m Dr. Daniel Garrett.” He walked to the nearest desk and handed the student a stack of papers. “Take one and pass it back. These are your syllabi.” He walked back to the center of the room and faced the class. “Most of you are probably wondering who I am and what I’m doing here. Dr. Hall was supposed to be teaching this course, but he recently met the love of his life and they eloped over the semester break. He informed the school he was overdue for a sabbatical and he was taking it now. He and his new wife are currently honeymooning in Cairo and working on a dig there.” Garrett smiled. “I understand this news caused some disturbance among the college administers. None of them can understand why someone would spend their honeymoon digging in the dirt.” There were chuckles from the class. “One of my friends from the department called to say they’d juggled schedules enough to cover all of Hall’s class except one, and could I please help out. I was moved by his desperate begging. So,” he spread his arms, “you lucky students are the only ones who have to put up with me.”
“This is fantastic,” Michael whispered to Ted. “Dr. Garrett is the best. If the college had announced he was teaching before registration, the class would have been full before we signed up. I bet once word gets out, a lot of people try to get in.”
Ted smiled and tried to hide his nervousness. This was a 300-level class, and it had taken some fast talking for him to get in without any of the prerequisites, and then it was only because the class was half-empty. Ted had been taking a chance with his GPA by signing up, but Dr. Hall was supposed to be an easy grader. Now “the best in the field” was teaching, and Ted doubted he’d have much patience for a student who was more interested in a fellow classmate than the class itself. He briefly considered dropping, but a glance at Michael’s excited, happy face changed his mind. He’d sacrifice more than his GPA to see Michael so happy.
That didn’t mean he’d let his GPA go without a fight though. Ted focused on Dr. Garrett, determined to keep up. Mostly keep up. He wouldn’t mind a little private tutoring from Michael.
~~~~
Ted frowned at the monitor, tapping his lips. Two weeks into the semester, and he already had a paper due. Egyptian Archeology was proving much more difficult than he’d expected. Much more interesting too. It was his favorite class, and Mike was only part of the reason. Dr. Garrett was fascinating, and if Ted wasn’t already completely wrapped up in all things Mike, he’d probably have a crush on the older man. He suspected Mike did have a crush on their professor, but was confident enough not to feel threatened by the hero-worship in his friend’s eyes every time he looked at or spoke about Dr. Garrett. If nothing else, Michael was too shy to act on it and too repressed to even acknowledge the feelings to himself.
To Ted’s surprise, Dr. Garrett had warmed to him immediately. He’d been impressed by a student taking a class so outside his major, and teased that they’d convert Ted yet. He’d offered to give Ted any additional help he might need, but warned he would not grade Ted easier just because he didn’t have the same background in the subject as the other students. Ted was determined to do well, and was happy that at least his writing skills were decent. He’d seen some of the essays written by his fellow would-be engineers, and had realized that the nearly-incomprehensible gibberish found in some technical manuals may not be a translation problem at all. He’d also learned that many of his fellow students did not take criticism well. There was a reason he didn’t have any science-major friends.
Ted glanced at the computer’s clock and hurriedly saved his work. It was time to meet Michael at the library for their usual study date.
One of these days he really should tell Michael it was a date.
~~~~
“Hey-ya, Boost.” Guy slapped Michael on the back and fell into step beside him. “Headed to the library again?”
“Yeah, Ted’s going to help me study for my calc test.”
“Don’t take this the wrong way, but if you keep hanging out with that queer, people are going to talk.”
Michael looked puzzled. “What queer?”
Guy rolled his eyes. “How many do you know?”
“None?”
Guy gaped at him. “Are you majoring in cluelessness? Kord! He practically licks his lips every time you bend over.”
“I can’t see his lips when I’m bent over,” Michael snapped, then frowned. “Ted’s gay? Are you sure?”
“He’s treasurer of the gay pride group, isn’t he?”
“They do let non-gays in. It’s about equality.”
Guy waved that off. “Whatever. He wears tights.”
“For gymnastics!”
“He ogles men. He ogles you.”
Michael had no retort. “I’ve never noticed,” he whispered.
Guy slapped him on the back. “Then you’re probably safe. If he wanted to make a move on you, he’d have mentioned it by now. Although how you never noticed,” Guy shook his head in baffled wonderment. “You really are oblivious.”
“Yeah,” Michael agreed, subdued.
“I gotta go. I’m meeting Tora in a few minutes.” Guy smirked and smoothed his hair. “Bea’s got a class for the next hour,” he gloated. “We’ll have the room to ourselves.”
“Have fun,” Mike said, and watched Guy saunter off before trudging to the library.
Ted was gay? And he’d been checking out Michael? Michael wasn’t sure he believed it. Ted was nice. He’d never tried to put a move on him. Even if he were gay, that didn’t mean he was attracted to Michael. But why hadn’t he told Michael?
Confused and distracted, Michael made his way to the library. Ted was already there. He smiled warmly at Michael. Michael promptly forgot the round-about speech he’d planned and blurted out “You’re gay.”
Ted frowned in confusion. “Ye-es?”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Michael dropped into a seat across from Ted, lowering his voice before the other students in the library got curious.
“I didn’t know I needed to. You didn’t know?”
“Guy had to tell me.”
Ted snickered. “How did you miss it? I’m not exactly subtle.”
“What do you mean? You act like a normal guy.”
Ted glared. “I am attracted to men. I flirt with men. I date men. I have sex with men. Believe it or not, that’s more than enough to meet the requirements. There are more choices than ‘in the closet’ or ‘flaming.’ I don’t go shopping and say, ‘I’ll buy that shirt, because I’m gay,’ or ‘I can’t wear that, it makes me look straight.’ I have a life and personality outside my sexual orientation.”
Michael stared at the table. “I guess.”
Ted bit his lip. “Mike?” He leaned over and stretched out a hand. When he touched Michael’s shoulder, Michael flinched and drew back.
“I have to go. Sorry.” He grabbed his bookbag and hurried to the exit. Ted watched him go, feeling sick.
“Ted?”
Ted started and turned to see Babs standing next to him. “Hey.”
“You okay?”
Ted nodded and stood. “Yeah. Fine. It’s nothing.”
“It didn’t look like nothing.” She hugged him. “Whatever it was, he’ll come around. It’ll take more than a disagreement to ruin your friendship.”
Ted hugged her back, wishing, for the first time in years, that he could be ecstatic about a curvy redhead pressed up against him. If he were straight, there’d be no chance of losing Mike. “I hope so.”
~~~~
Michael closed the textbook in frustration. Half an hour of studying, and he couldn’t even remember which dynasty the chapter was on.
Ted was gay. Everyone knew it but him. It was obvious. Except not, because Ted wasn’t defined by his sexuality. Mike tried to think of the clues everyone but him saw. Okay, there was the gay pride group. And a lot of Ted’s and his friends’ jokes made more sense now. But Mike was certain he’d never seen Ted checking out a guy. He’d also never seen him checking out a girl, but Michael didn’t check out girls either, so that wasn’t proof of anything. The girls were all very comfortable with Ted; they were always touching him and flirting. He supposed that was a sign. Girls seemed to like gay guys. His sister had once told him it was because they were safe.
He’d never seen Ted with a guy. Sure, he had male friends, but no boyfriends. He didn’t flirt with other guys. Ralph was comfortable rooming with him, and while Sue sometimes warned Ted to keep his hands to himself, it was always teasing.
Maybe Ted, like Mike, had decided to focus on academics? That would explain the lack of dating and the eagerness to study.
Michael flopped down on his bed. He’d overreacted this afternoon. It wasn’t like he cared. He knew other gay people. He’d just been surprised. And he’d never really been friends with a gay man before. He’d never really been friends with anyone.
He wanted to talk to someone about all this. Normally he’d talk to Ted, but that wouldn’t work until he sorted things out in his head. All of Ted’s friends would take Ted’s side. Guy wasn’t exactly Mr. Sensitive. Maybe Scott would listen? Scott was pretty open-minded, and friendly and supportive, and he wasn’t part of Ted’s circle. Scott and Michael weren’t close, but they’d lived together for two years now, and got along okay. Michael listened after Scott and Barda fought, so Scott owed him.
Michael opened his textbook again, trying to study until Scott got back. He’d almost managed to concentrate when the door opened and Scott and Barda spilled in, giggling and fumbling with each other. “Oh,” Barda said, seeing Michael. She pushed Scott away and scowled. Scott turned and looked surprised to see Michael.
“Hey. I thought you were at the library.”
“Yeah, something came up.” Michael looked at them, Barda clearly annoyed and Scott trying to hide his disappointment, and gave up any hope of a heart-to-heart talk. He closed his textbook and stood. “Sorry. Didn’t realize you’d want the room. I’ll go study downstairs.”
Scott smiled. “Thanks, Mike.”
“Yeah. Anytime.”
~~~~
Michael shifted his feet and took a deep breath before knocking. He was being silly. Tora wouldn’t tell Guy. At least, not the specifics. Bea wouldn’t tell to John. Or she might, but John wouldn’t kill him for being confused. John wouldn’t tell Ted. Guy wouldn’t kill him for visiting his girlfriend’s room. Michael almost bolted at that last thought, but it was too late. The door opened, and Tora smiled at him. “Hello, Michael. Are you looking for Guy?”
“No. Is he here?”
Tora opened the door wider and took his hand, pulling him inside. “He left about ten minutes ago. If you aren’t looking for him, why did you ask?”
Bea was sitting at her desk, doing homework and listening to music. She looked up as Michael entered.
“I don’t want to talk to him. I want to talk to you.” Bea raised an eyebrow at that, pulling out her earbuds. She sized him up for a moment, then nodded.
“You are nicer than Guy. Much better for Tora than that lout.”
“Bea! Guy is really a sweet person. And I’m sure Michael isn’t trying to steal me from Guy.” She giggled at that.
“No! Definitely no! Please don’t even joke about that where Guy could hear!”
“You do not like Tora?” Bea stood, her high heels making her almost eye-level with Michael, and advanced on him. Michael stepped back, but Tora had already closed the door, and his escape was cut off.
“Bea, stop it,” Tora scolded. “Would you like to sit down, Michael?”
Michael glanced around the room and sat on the chair at the other desk, not daring to touch the beds. “I need to talk to someone,” he blurted, “and there’s no one else I can talk to.”
“Why not Ted?” Tora asked. “You two are close.”
“It’s about Ted.” Michael took a deep breath and explained everything. Bea laughed when Michael said he hadn’t known Ted was gay, but a glare from Tora kept her quiet after that. Michael hadn’t meant to tell everything in front of Bea, but once he started he couldn’t stop, trying to put into words his confusion and feelings of betrayal. Tora perched on the edge of her bed and took his hands, squeezing them reassuringly.
When he’d finished, Tora stood and hugged him. “Is that everything?”
“I think so,” Michael said, sniffing but most decidedly not crying. It was probably allergies.
“You are an idiot,” Bea announced. “Ted is nice, and your friend. He has always been gay, just as Dinah has always been a brunette and you have always had 20/20 vision. Nothing has changed except that now you know.”
“You have 20/20 vision?” Tora asked, while Michael reevaluated his belief that John wouldn’t spill secrets. He mentally filed away the “Dinah’s a brunette” for later.
“Yes,” Bea answered, “the glasses are a prop. Sue told me.”
John was safe. Sue was not. Michael was glad he hadn’t gone to her.
“I don’t understand why you are upset. You should be happy,” Bea insisted.
Michael furrowed his brow. “Because my friend is comfortable with himself and has made a decision he is happy with?”
Bea rolled her eyes. “Because now you know he is gay too. You can date.”
“What? I’m not gay!”
Tora shushed him, glaring at Bea. “Don’t mind Bea. She’s just teasing.”
“You’re not gay?” She frowned. “Guy was right? Are you sure this isn’t a sign of the end of the world?”
“Guy said he thought Ted was checking me out,” Michael whispered, worried that he’d said something to give both Ted and Bea the wrong impression.
Bea waved his comment aside. “So? Lots of people check you out. I have.”
“What?” There really should be a daily limit on shocking revelations.
“You are attractive. At least an eight, maybe a nine if you dressed up. You are also intelligent, funny, and non-threatening. Lots of girls find you appealing.”
Michael stood, edging towards the door. “I should go now.”
Bea stood and followed him. “This is what I meant by non-threatening. You are adorably vulnerable.”
“What about John?” Michael asked desperately.
Bea rolled her eyes. “I said you were good-looking, not that I was desperately in love with you. That’s my point. People like to look at you. This does not mean they are going to drag you off into a closet and do naughty things to you.” She cocked her head, considering. “Well, Sue might, if she weren’t so involved in Ralph. And what’s-his-name, the Olympic guy, he would if it weren’t for his girlfriend. I suppose I might, if I just wanted an itch scratched. Ted probably would too, if he got the chance. But so long as we all have boyfriends, you’re safe.”
“Ted doesn’t have a boyfriend,” Michael pointed out.
Bea shrugged. “Mostly safe.”
“Bea, you’re scaring him.” Tora pushed past Bea and rested a hand on Michael’s arm. “What Bea is trying to say is that you are very handsome, and people notice that, but that doesn’t mean they want to pursue a relationship with you. They just like looking at you.”
“Great,” Mike muttered, turning to leave. “Now I’m artwork and gay.” He trudged down the hall, and feeling just as miserable and confused as he had before the talk with Tora. “I thought talking things out and unburdening yourself was supposed to help,” he grumbled. Once outside the girls’ dorm, he stopped and looked around. He couldn’t go back to his room yet, the library seemed very unwelcoming at the moment, and he still wasn’t ready to face Ted. He thought about heading to the gym for a work-out, but then he remembered some of the comments he’d never paid much attention to before-from men and women-during his previous work-outs, and didn’t think he could stand being ogled right now.
He still wanted to talk, hopefully to someone who was better at things than Bea was. Sighing, he turned and headed towards John’s dorm. Between Bea and Ted, John would hear about things soon enough anyway. Maybe the psych major could fix him.
~~~~
“You don’t need fixing,” John said after Mike had finished his story.
“That’s helpful,” Mike grumbled, slouched on the floor against the bed. John was sitting cross-legged across from him, strangely stiff in spite of the informal seating arrangements.
“Your reactions are normal. Textbook even,” John assured him. “There’s nothing wrong with you.”
Mike sighed, relieved that at least someone thought so. “Then why do I feel so wrong?”
“Because your environment, or at least your perception of it, has changed and you have not adjusted yet. That doesn’t mean you are flawed in some way. You just need to adapt.”
“How?” Mike asked, hating how close to whining he sounded. Fix this and make it better, make it how it was, he wanted to say.
“Let’s break this down and look at it rationally,” John suggested. “What bothers you the most: homosexuality, your friend’s homosexuality, or that you found out about it through a third party?”
“The last one, I guess,” Mike said. “I mean, Ted being gay is weird, but I don’t have any problems with homosexuality in general.”
“But it’s weird?”
Mike frowned. “I didn’t say that. Okay, I did, but that’s not what I meant.” He fumbled for the words. “He’s Ted, you know? He’s not supposed to be…” he trailed off, looking for words that didn’t sound homophobic. He didn’t care that there were gay people, he just cared that Ted was gay. It was different.
“Homosexuality is the Other,” John intoned. “It is normal to fear what is different and strange. From humankind’s earliest days, we have stayed close to the family unit, the people and places we know, and avoided or waged war on those different from us.”
“I don’t want to avoid or fight gay people,” Mike insisted.
“Of course not,” John agreed. “But they are Other. Ted isn’t. He’s your friend. He’s familiar and safe, and suddenly you learned he wasn’t. You feel threatened and confused, and it was only made worse because it came from an unexpected source.”
Mike nodded. “Yes! He’s Ted. He’s not supposed to be gay or checking me out.”
John raised an eyebrow. “He checked you out?”
Mike shrugged. “That’s what Guy said. And Bea thought I was gay and wanted to date Ted. And…” Mike trailed off, thinking. “He does, doesn’t he? He flirts. I am such an idiot.”
John sighed. “I warned him,” he muttered, but Mike heard.
“You knew! Does everyone know?”
John looked at Mike, his face expressionless except for one small wrinkle between his eyebrows, and Mike couldn’t read faces well enough to know if it was worry or confusion or annoyance, or just squinting because the light was too bright. “I’m not the one who should be telling you this.”
“No, Ted is, but he hasn’t, and I’m already getting it from everyone else. I could just ask Ralph or Sue or anyone, I bet. You at least won’t exaggerate.”
John nodded. “I won’t reveal things he told me in confidence, but what is common knowledge is safe, I suppose. Ted finds you attractive. He likes you, a lot. He hid it because he values your friendship and did not want to risk damaging it. I doubt he intended to hide his homosexuality though. While he does not allow it to define him solely, and thankfully avoids the more irritating stereotypes, he has never hid it. His friends all know, and we do mention it from time to time. I suspect you have begun to remember certain comments that allude to Ted’s preferences?” Mike nodded. “It never occurred to any of us that you did not know, or we would have told you. We are used to everyone knowing, and so see no reason to be explicit about it.”
“I guess.” Mike leaned up against the wall. “He likes me?”
“You should talk to him,” was the only answer John would give.
TBC
Part 4