I just finished my boards.  According to livejournal, it's been 21 weeks since my last post.  The hiatus has been pretty lonely and kind of surreal.  I used to write to maintain my center and now, I realized that center was as fictitious as any sort of belief I had.  Breaking it down, just to build it back up again, isn't that always the case ( Read more... )

            Things are never what they seem, it’s been said, reflected on, dissected and put back together, but I am still learning some basic life lessons for the first time.  I believed at one point and time in my life that I seemed to have things put together and I had a clear view of the world.  Now that I look back on those views they were ( Read more... )

    I just registered myself for the boards and I will be taking them at the end of June, 2008.  Hopefully all will go well and I will pass.  Personally, I find it very strange that the medical education system will have us pass a test that will determine what specialty that we can apply at the end of this four year endevour during our second year ( Read more... )

            I never win, the battle is never decisive enough.  What I used to think was an obvious challenge in my life just got flipped-turned-upside down.  Unbelievable to think that things aren’t what the seem on the surface are so clear once you hit a certain age.  The hard part isn’t recognizing what your issue is, that’s something you’ve ( Read more... )

I get this in my email the other day ( Read more... )

             Funny, the connections I draw from Long Island to Los Angeles.  They are all there, some of them are subtle and others are not so.  The story itself describes a search for a rocket during and post-world war 2.  It reads much like a fast-paced adventure novel, but with plot twists and sex.  It describes several depraved acts and then ( Read more... )

            “Sure, I’ll go, it sounds like something that might make some sense for once.”  I hadn’t seen Daniel for going on two years now and back when we used to work together in Chinatown.  It’s my bad habit - when you’re out of sight, you’re out of mind.  I don’t mean to, do something like this, but I thought that maybe things are turning ( Read more... )

        I wanted to talk about how I ended up at a monastery over the weekend with a very close friend of mine, but I think it’s more poignant to talk about the last ten days in Southern California.  I never made it to the beaches, well, I did but in passing.  They’re a bit overrated in the winter, besides I wanted to be in Seal Beach with a ( Read more... )

            I sit in a coffee house near where I used to go to high school.  It’s surreal, 8 years ago, I walked the halls just to get an education.  I walked away from the experience another person.  I sat around with these women I went to school with last night, in a local tea shop called Ten Ren.   I loved one once, not anymore, I don’t think I ( Read more... )

             Funny, I talked about seeing a therapist for the last ten years of my life.  Ever since junior year of high school, I talked myself out of it a couple of times.  That I was too busy, too concerned with other things in my life, and engaged in my significant other.  I would lose my edge, my sense of humor, my personality.  However, it ( Read more... )