(Untitled)

[benchilada]

I can never seem to properly express what this time was like.

I either get the seriousness of it across, which brings everybody down and prompts unwanted pity, or I tell it vaguely jokingly, and fail to quantify the abject horribleness of it all.

You see what you think.

Comments

[jimmahgee]

I love you, Ben Stone.

[grafunkel]

And he loves us ALL!

Ain't he The Greatness?

[benchilada]

And he loves us ALL!

Oddly, that's completely true...

[grafunkel]

My cuddly Bubby Bear!

*hugs*

[benchilada]

One of my criteria for medication is that it CANNOT give me a baseline that's below my personally acceptable batshit levels.

I had one, once, that kinda did, and it was a nightmare. It was like I'd suddenly become both bored and boring.

As for you, if that depression becomes even MILDLY debilitating, go see somebody. Maybe not pills if you don't need them, but don't wait until it gets worse, and don't "settle" with the idea that you'll "always be like this" until you die.

[benchilada]

Nah, man, it was a dorm room. They're practically made as S.S. jail cells.

Maybe if I'd tried S.S.2...

[benchilada]

It's always nice to hear a REAL illustrator commenting on things like this.
I think that, ultimately, the reason I've decided to do some of my Fuckbrain(tm) stuff as comics is that they work better when explained in person, so I thought I'd do a comic with shitty drawings of me talking directly to the reader.

Glad you're enjoing this. I anticipate me doing these FB Comix for a while...

[wulfsbane]

It's interesting to read about other people's past difficulties due to fuckbrain, as you put it. I've struggled with depression and attention deficit disorder for over a decade now. At it's worst, my depression got to the point where it affected my nervous system and I no longer processed pain. I just couldn't feel physical harm. o.O

[benchilada]

It was fascinating when I finally had my neurologist and my psychwhatever both agree, independently, that I'm not ADHD, but that I have the exact symptoms brought on by the combo of Tourette's, Bipolar, and general OMGWTFBBQBrain.

No physical pain? That's fascinating...can I hear more?

[wulfsbane]

Well, it was a REALLY long time ago, and a strange thing with me is I really don't remember much from sixth grade through my sophomore year of high school. I remember vague details, and random specific events, but nothing concrete.

It would be the kind of thing like I'd smash my hand in a door and wouldn't realize my thumb's sticking out at the wrong angle, so later I'd look at my hand and be confused, then push it back into place with a pop. (happened twice. Doesn't seem to be anything wrong with it). Or I'd be bleeding from something and not remember being cut.
I could smash my head against pretty much anything and only feel the vibration in my skull, but no discomfort... just some dizziness for a while >_>